There are so many emotions to hold in that I was undeniably feeling relentless just a few minutes after the conference had started. I look at him again, his eyes still intense but also empty. It’s all too familiar that I freeze as soon as he stands straight. I have this tendency to block out the world when thoughts are swimming in my head but with Chul, it was just so damn quiet. It stings.

Mr. Lee looked at me before he turns his head to find Chul quietly listening. He almost jumped out of his seat but Chul just softly shakes his head and motions for the presentation to continue but he pulls out a chair and offers it inaudibly.

I’m standing on the edge of a cliff and one movement will push me to fall face flat on the ground. With gracefulness, Chul walks toward the seat offered to him. He s his suit and fixates his eyes on the screen. So, I did too, with all my might.

They presented a list of models and celebrities they’re willing to sign for the advertisements, as well as the magazines and websites that could possibly cater to more audiences.

“As, well, you’ve seen on the paper works we sent out, we wanted to also campaign for all genders to give light to the current issues. But this… we actually wanted it to be toned down because we don’t want the campaign to steal the spotlight of the resort.”

He ended the presentation and Julie steps forward to begin hers. My mind drifts away with the ocean tide like a thread tied to a kite soaring the raging winds of the sky. I swallow the big lump on my throat too many times that I completely blocked out the fact that the man I was wanting to meet again for a long time is sitting just ing across the table.

If they didn’t clap for Julie, my mind would’ve sailed away farther to the endless sea but I snap back as soon as I hear Aly’s voice whispering something. As a reflex, I lean in closer to her, completely blank on what she’s talking about. I nod trying to look like I understand everything she said. A loud pounding on my chest begins when I raise my head and accidentally meet eyes with Chul.

He blankly stares with his head tilted on his right. This is getting a lot more chaotic than how I pictured meeting him again. Well, at least, internally. I even practiced in my head, wrote down the words I will say—Where were you? Why did you leave me? How are you? Have you been well? —but right now, with his eyes sending my whole being to a rollercoaster, the words didn’t seem to fit.

My eyes swiftly drift from him to Mr. Lee who has taken over the floor. He concludes the meeting and offered his appreciation to everyone who came over to participate with the bidding.

. I don’t know what the hell happened.

As soon as I look at Julie, I knew we got the project. Her face instantly grows brighter as victory reigns over it. I smile at her and tap her shoulder to let her know she did a good job. It’s the least thing I can think of doing right now. I’m having trouble regaining my self-control and composure.

“I’m hungry,” Aly’s voice beside me makes my head snap back to look at her. Her voice sounded like so innocent and free—she sounded like my Aly. And I’m soft for this Aly.

I nod my head and laugh a little. She knows. “Alright, let’s go eat.”

“That’s more like you now…” She sighs and abruptly stands. “Relax and composed.”

Her bag is back on her shoulder, her phone ringing which she didn’t mind answering. Instead, she faces Chul and bows her head. “Thank you for such a great opportunity, Sir.”

I have to look. I know I do. If I won’t act cool right now, I probably never will. Chul slightly nods his head and bites a small portion of his lips.

“Please leave th