the doctor
UNCHANGEABLE"so, how are you holding up?"
seulgi, who's lying on the couch, hears seungwan's voice behind her.
"better. i can no longer hear the voices."
"that's nice. do you remember when exactly the voices stopped?"
seulgi's eyes dart left and right before she settles to looking straight ahead. "they seem to disappear when..." she hesitates.
"go ahead. it's better if you tell me everything with no filters."
"okay." seulgi breathes in. "the voices seem to stop whenever joohyun is around me." she pauses, waiting for seungwan to speak. but the doctor stays silent. "they will return, but the reoccurrence lessens, and it keeps decreasing until they go away permanently."
seungwan hums. "what do you think joohyun is doing that silences these voices?"
seulgi takes a bit of time to respond. "can't say. but i think it's because i've always seen her as home--my home--when we were still together. maybe that impression stayed with me even after we broke up, a reason i feel calm and at ease whenever she's around--like i can finally relax from a long and tiring day."
"hm. do you see yerim in the same way?"
"yerim brings me a different feeling, like whenever i see her all i wanted to do is protect her, make her happy, and make sure she's loved and taken cared for."
"mm-mm. with the things you mentioned about yerim, do you remember feeling something like that towards another person?"
"well, it's almost the same with my affection towards joohyun, but it's different in a way. it's like..." seulgi clicks her tongue, unsure of what to say.
"it's like the affection of a parent towards an offspring," says seungwan. "is that what you wanted to say?"
seulgi wants to glance at seungwan from behind her but her cast won't allow her to do so. "yeah. i guess you're right. it's like how joohyun is to yerim."
"so, how do you feel about joohyun doing these things for you?"
"happy. and scared."
"what are you scared of?"
" i know she's trying to build me up again like what she did before; fix me slowly, piece by piece, until i become whole again. but i know she won't be staying, seungwan. and i don't know what will happen to me again after all of this is over."
her statement hangs in the air. seulgi can tell seungwan is thinking this thoroughly.
"i'm curious," seungwan speaks again. "have you had these attacks before when you broke up?"
"i was depressed, but i don't think i've had attacks like these because i was busy with sau operations." seulgi tilts her head to the side. "i'm still busy now with a lot of work stuff before this happened, so i'm not sure what caused it."
seungwan stays silent as she keeps tapping her pen on her notebook. "i think i know what's missing."
"please tell me it's not love life."
seungwan chuckles. "it's somehow related to that, but much bigger than that." she walks over to the couch and taps seulgi's forehead with her pen. "you lack a purpose, seulgi. a purpose."
seulgi creases her forehead. "a purpose?"
"yup, a purpose." seungwan sits on the sofa across seulgi. "a reason to live. a flame to keep you burning. a drive to keep you going. you don't have that anymore after you were dismissed from sau. your current work--these endorsements and business investments--it gives you money, but it doesn't give you any sense of accomplishment because of your lack of purpose."
seulgi's body relaxes. "come to think of it, i think you're right, seungwan."
"thank you for agreeing." seungwan smiles. "that's the reason yerim has this effect on you because she gives you a sense of purpose like you wanted to protect her. you were used to doing that for years. saving people has been your life goal. and now that evens are gone and the entirety of aef is dissolved, your purpose is gone."
"so, i need to find a new purpose..." said seulgi thoughtfully. "but how?"
"that's tough because a purpose is subjective," says seungwan. "a doctor's purpose is to cure his or her patient. a parent's purpose is to provide for his or her family. a lover's purpose is to make his or her lover happy. an artist's purpose is to inspire people with his or her works. the list goes on."
seulgi stays silent, thinking deeply.
"don't force it. it may not come to you right away. but you can always start with the little things."
seulgi glances at her friend. "little things like?"
"like finding a girlfriend."
"ugh." seulgi rolls her eyes. "like i can do that in my current state."
"or get a pet. those fluffy creatures can give love expecting nothing in return. and they give you purpose too."
seulgi nods. taking it all in. "getting a pet sounds good."
"this is just a phase, seulgi." seungwan smiles warmly. "whatever you're feeling now, it's just a phase. everyone goes through something like that in different intensity. what's important is for you not to give up. it'll be okay. trust me. everything will be okay."
seulgi can feel something inside her get ignited by those words.
"you're right, seungwan. it'll be all right."
---
"joohyun says they'll be here any minute now. not sure if yerim's with them, but junmyeon will be here."
seulgi scratches her head. "do you really have to leave me alone with them?"
"believe me, i'd be here if it weren't for my appointment with another patient."
seulgi sighs in defeat. "thanks for the visit and the lunch."
"anytime. i'll go now, okay? take care."
"you too."
seulgi watches seungwan walk down and along the parking. not having much to do, seulgi spaces out until the door to her neighbour opens.
"oh. hey, seulgi..." sunmi steps out of her room in a black skirt and red striped blouse. "what are you doing outside alone again?"
"just looking..." seulgi gestures to the parking lot, didn't notice a new car arrived. "a friend just came by."
"oh. cool. so, you're all alone again?"
"not in a little while. someone's coming over."
"wow. lots of visitors, huh." sunmi fixes the bag on her shoulder. "do you live here alone?"
"yup. but my friends are checking on me all the time while i recover. you?"
"same. since we both live alone, maybe we could hang out sometime? if you don't have visitors?"
"yeah. sure. i'd love to. would be better tho once i've recovered."
"don't worry, you'll be back in no time." sunmi trails the cast on seulgi's arm. "i can even give you a massage once this cast has been removed, to restore your arm's mobility."
"really? you can do that?"
sunmi nods before her eyes catch two people in the hallway. "i guess your friends are here."
seulgi turns and sees joohyun walking with junmyeon hand in hand. she clears .
"hey, seulgi," greets junmyeon, smiling. "it's nice to see you looking better now."
"yeah. thanks." she briefly glances at joohyun before gesturing to sunmi. "but the way, this is sunmi. she lives next door. and sunmi, this is junmyeon and joohyun."
sunmi shakes hands with the couple. "it's nice to meet you."
"i'm curious. by any chance, are you a therapist by profession? we happen to hear you offered seulgi a massage," asks junmyeon.
"yes, i'm a licenced physical therapist, specialising in orthopaedic and neurological therapy," says sunmi. "i also took courses under massage therapy."
joohyun and junmyeon look surprised. "wow. it must be nice to have a family member who knows stuff like that, huh?"
sunmi smiles, but seulgi didn't miss the awkwardness behind that.
"maybe you can help seulgi here once she's recovered?" junmyeon turns to his wife. "what do you think, babe?"
"y-yeah, sure. if seulgi likes her." joohyun nods hesitantly. "i meant, if seulgi prefers her, then it's fine instead of hiring another therapist, right?"
"sure. it'll be my pleasure." sunmi's smile grows wider. "by the way, i really should go now. i'll see you guys around. and don't hesitate to knock on my door if you need something," she tells seulgi.
they say their thank-yous and goodbyes before sunmi leaves them.
"so, she's a therapist after all," murmurs junmyeon. "a licensed therapist to be exact. that's totally different from a masseuse, babe."
"well, the landlady says she's bringing a lot of clients home, which i think caused the misconception," says joohyun.
"she did say she took massage therapy courses tho. never mind." junmyeon turns to seulgi. "why don't we go inside for now? my orthopaedist friend will come over in a bit to check on you."
seulgi is glad someone's coming over to ease the tension between them.
---
"so, do you like it here?" asks junmyeon, his eyes observing the apartment.
seulgi nods. "yes. it's comfy. thank you for having me around."
"this is the only thing we can do after all the things you've done for my kid, myself, and my wife." junmyeon glances at joohyun who's seated beside him. "we haven't got the chance to talk after what happened in jeoswa two years ago, and i'd like to take this opportunity to thank you, with my whole heart, for risking your life to save us. we're forever grateful for that."
"it is always my pleasure to help," says seulgi. "as what i've told joohyun here, you don't owe me anything. but still, thank you for the support you're giving."
junmyeon turns to his wife. "what do you think about hiring a private nurse for seulgi? she needs to be with someone all day."
"there's no need for that if i can go here daily before and after work to check on her," says joohyun. "i can even bring yerim here every afternoon so they can play together."
"you know seulgi can't do those activities yet, babe."
"yerim knows that," says joohyun. "they can draw together, or watch tv together. you know how much your daughter wants to be with seulgi."
junmyeon sighs, looks at seulgi, then smiles. "you know the saying 'a happy wife means a happy life'?"
seulgi fakes a chuckle and looks down.
yeah. right.
"i hope everything's okay with you, seulgi; to have me here, my wife, and yerim," says junmyeon. "i mean, i don't want to avoid the elephant in the room. i am completely aware of what you and joohyun shared in the past. but we're not kids anymore; we're adults and should act maturely about this. i want you to know that i trust you and joohyun."
seulgi meets joohyun's eyes. she can tell the other woman is feeling awkward with the topic.
"joohyun's mom told us of what yerim told you in the forest the day she got lost," adds junmyeon. "i want to clarify that i am not mad at you. i was an unreasonable man at that time. maybe i miss my family that much as was being immature. don't worry. joohyun surely knocked some senses to me after."
seulgi fakes another smile, unsure of what to say.
gosh. she doesn't want to imagine how joohyun knocked some senses to him.
because joohyun tends to be too sweet and sensual before whenever they are fighting and she's trying to apologise.
seulgi blinks a few times, trying to shake the idea off her head.
"i understand. thank you for the trust," she says instead. "whatever happened between me and joohyun before, that was a long time ago. we're different people now. it won't affect us or what you have in any way."
she can feel joohyun is staring intently at her.
"thanks." junmyeon smiles warmly. "i always wanted to be friends with the kang seulgi, you know." he chuckles. "i don't want your past with my wife to hinder that." he offers his hand. "so, friends?"
a knock on the door interrupts them before seulgi can even shake junmyeon's hand.
"ahh. i think that's her." junmyeon stands to his feet. "excuse me. i'll get that."
there is a little awkward moment once seulgi and joohyun are alone. but the velvet voice coming from the person behind the door makes seulgi look.
and boy, it is a sight to behold.
seulgi stares, hangs open. she can't believe some doctors are this beautiful.
junmyeon leads the long-haired woman in a simple white dress inside. seulgi and joohyun stand up as a courtesy.
"you've already met my wife before," says junmyeon. "seulgi, this is doctor park gyuri, my orthopaedist friend i was talking about earlier. she's the one who took care of you after the accident."
"thank you, doctor," says seulgi, feeling rather shy of how beautiful the doctor is.
"just call me gyuri," says the doctor. "it feels awkward to hear kang seulgi address me so formally."
"she's a fan of yours," junmyeon whispers to seulgi, thumb pointing at gyuri. "she is totally excited to go here today."
"yah. junmyeon."
"don't deny it. i know you had a crush on seulgi even when we were interns." junmyeon chuckles.
"yah! junmyeon!"
seulgi blushes and looks down.
joohyun clears . "please stop with the teasing, babe. can we proceed with the check-up now since we still have to pick up yerim from school in a bit?"
junmyeon clears his throat and composes himself. "yeah. right. totally forgot about that." he turns to gyuri. "please start now, doctor park."
gyuri smirks. "sure, doctor kim."
it still hurt seulgi to hear joohyun address her husband in that way. but the sight of the pretty doctor in front of her somehow helps ease the pain.
she smiles a bit, thinking about the crazy situation she's in.
if getting injured and agreeing to joohyun's wishes meant meeting beautiful girls like sunmi and gyuri, then maybe, just maybe, seulgi made the right decision.
---
"i knew i should have dragged you with us when we were about to leave the island for our honeymoon," says sooyoung, stretching her long legs on the coffee table.
"that's selfish. who would have saved yerim if i wasn't there?" asks seulgi.
"i'm sure the staff would have found her first." sooyoung spreads her arms on the couch this time. "and just so you know, the kid would not have run away from her parents if she didn't see them fighting, which was because of you."
"are you saying it's my fault i got injured?"
"not really. but i told you to stay away from them, remember?"
"not that easy. we were at your wedding. and tell me, how can i even ignore yerim, huh?"
sooyoung shifts her position, bringing her feet down and resting her elbows on her knees.
"hey. i know you're worried," says seulgi. "i don't know why these things are happening too. but joohyun and i are civil towards each other. she even told me herself she doesn't have plans of leaving her husband for me nor anyone."
"ouch." sooyoung looks at her friend, worried.
"i'm fine. i'm fine." seulgi quickly waves a hand. "at least she made it clear. no expectations."
"and are you all right with that?"
"i'm getting used to it." seulgi glances at the painting. "and the more i see them together, the more i feel numb. maybe that's what i need, to see them together and happy until this stubborn brain of mine feels too much pain it'll just reject all joohyun-related thoughts."
"maybe this is what you need after all? you said it makes you feel numb, right? is it really helping?"
"i think so. i won't claim i'm not affected at all. but i'm getting used to it."
"if you say so. just remember, i'm always here, okay? sungjae and i are here for you. call us anytime."
"yeah. i would call you even if you're having , and i wouldn't care."
a pillow hits seulgi's face after.
in case you missed reading the foreword, this is a sequel story. if you haven't read untouchable yet, i suggest you go over that before proceeding with this.
enjoy!
enjoy!
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