part two of double update

The last year of middle school and Eunhyuk was playing in Kyuhyun’s house. He was excited to grow up and go to high school. Then he would go to college, study hard and own a company. He wanted to earn a lot of money to buy a big house, a big car and drive around the city with Donghae. He would let Kyuhyun tag along too. Given how smart Kyuhyun was, he could simply own his own company and buy his car. Donghae, however, would have to depend on him. Donghae should depend on him.

“What are you doing? Let me go.” Kyuhyun tried to free from Eunhyuk’s arms. He was caught in a deadly headlock. It wasn’t his fault that Eunhyuk was defeated in a game.

“You cheated!”

“I did not. I play fair and square.” Kyuhyun screamed and elbowed Eunhyuk’s in his ribs making him squeal and let go.

“OWW!!!” Eunhyuk rubbed his ribs and attacked Kyuhyun once again.

“HYUKKKIIIIEEEEE!!!!” Another voice stopped them in their actions.

“Donghae?” Eunhyuk shoved Kyuhyun away and smiled at his best friend. Kyuhyun grumbled about favoritism.

“You look happy. What happened?”

“You won’t believe it!” Donghae’s hair was long and the mop on his head was huge. His eyes were wide and innocent. “I have a girlfriend now!”

~

“What are you doing here?” Kyuhyun asked Eunhyuk who was standing outside the gate.

“Donghae said he’d come to play with me.”

“When? At midnight?” Kyuhyun raised an eyebrow. It was already eight at night and he was sure he had seen Eunhyuk outside two hours ago too.

Eunhyuk remained silent. His parents had asked him to come inside so many times but he didn’t move.

“He’s not going to come, stupid.” Kyuhyun whacked his head. “And you can wait inside. Why stand here?”

“We will go to eat ice cream. Better to go from here than waste time by going inside. He’s already late.” His voice was soft.

Kyuhyun wondered whether or not he should tell Eunhyuk that Donghae was with Minji, his girlfriend, at the park. He decided not to tell.

~

“Eunhyuk, I can’t come to your birthday party. But I have a gift for you. Here, take it.” Donghae gave a bag to him.

Eunhyuk accepted the bag.

Kyuhyun was surprised. Donghae always came to Eunhyuk’s birthday party. He always came before the party even started. Why not this time?

“Why are you not coming?” Kyuhyun frowned.

“Because Minji’s birthday is also today. She invited me too.”

~

“Eunhyuk-ah?” Kyuhyun woke up to the sound of sobs.

Eunhyuk’s birthday party was over. Kyuhyun had decided to sleepover at his place. Every year, Donghae would be the one to stay for the night. But since Donghae won’t make it tonight, Kyuhyun decided to fill in. He didn’t want Eunhyuk to feel lonely.

But he was woken up by barely controlled sobs and Eunhyuk’s shaking body,

Concerned, Kyuhyun sat up and put a hand on the crying boy’s shoulder.

“What happened?”

Eunhyuk looked at him, tears all over his face.

He hugged Kyuhyun tightly.

“I don’t know what to do. It hurts.”

“Where? Should I call aunty?”

Eunhyuk shook his head. “Donghae, he isn’t here.”

~

“…then I popped a balloon and she jumped. It was so funny. You should have been there, Hyukkie. It was so much fun.” Donghae was telling him about Minji’s birthday party.

Eunhyuk listened in silence and smiled now and then. He felt so hurt. It seemed liked Donghae enjoyed Minji’s birthday party more than he ever enjoyed Eunhyuk’s.

He had now realized that he didn’t see Donghae as his friend only. He loved Donghae. And to see him so happy with her made Eunhyuk so sad.

~

“What happened, Eunhyuk? You cry a lot recently.” Kyuhyun asked Eunhyuk. They were playing and Donghae didn’t come. When Kyuhyun called Donghae’s mom, on Eunhyuk’s request, it turned out that the boy was with Minji.

“Because I’m stupid.” The older boy was weeping again.

“You were always stupid. But you never cried before. Tell me, what happened?”

“I’m in love with Donghae.” Eunhyuk sobbed.

~

Eunhyuk loved Donghae. He loved him so much. He never stopped loving him. When he first came to know what love was, he fell for his best friend. Though he got hurt a lot when Donghae started dating a girl back in middle school. He vowed to stop loving Donghae. Even though he got infatuated with someone else, Donghae was someone who always stayed in his heart. There was no place for anyone else.

When Somin said that he liked Donghae more than her and broke up with him, he wondered how much of it was true. He realized that unknowingly, he had set Somin aside for Donghae. Even though he tried to appease her, appease himself, he couldn’t just keep himself away from the boy. When he was with her, he still thought of his best friend, he talked about him and he compared everyone with Donghae as if it was their fault for not being like him.

He knew it when they broke up that he wasn’t over Donghae. He knew it for sure. That’s when he decided that he was going to give up. He was sure that Donghae was never going to return his feelings. Moreover, he couldn’t risk their friendship at all. Never ever.

But after seeing Donghae getting close and cozy with Kyuhyun, he started to feel jealous. He tried to convince himself that it didn’t bother him but that was like standing against a tornado. There was no way he won’t get blown away by the swirl of feelings, especially jealousy.

He wanted Donghae. But the question was – did Donghae want him? The answer to him was still no, the same back in middle school. Being optimistic wasn’t easy for him. That too when it concerned Donghae. The predictable but still unpredictable Donghae. Moreover, he feared that Donghae would show up with a girl once again and introduce her as his girlfriend. He was so scared of getting his heartbroken once again.

He scolded himself and his feelings. Why did he have to fall in love with Donghae? There were so many people in the world. Why did it have to be him?