“….and if anything else, I wanted to thank you in person again. That I could somehow tell you how your words lift me up a bit. Hoping that I would find the courage to.

 

Seulgi”

 

 

A smile has formed slowly on Joohyun’s sorrowful face. Thinking back, Seulgi’s the kind who would never open things up. She always had a hunch that maybe, the lone woman was taking all her courage to do so and was yet to interpret those emotions she felt. Of course, she was always there patiently waiting. Although Joohyun wanted to ask questions to her, she also understand that Seulgi was struggling on expressing it.

 

While reading the first letter, she reminisces those unforgettable moments. The way she scared out of her by approaching with such consistency, and the way Seulgi was indeed avoiding any conversations or sort of because she doesn’t have the energy to. And the way her eyes were too deep – showing no emotions and as if it held too much despair already given up life, but somehow screams help.

 

She also noticed how those beautiful monolid eyes blinked softly wondering if what she heard was right. And Joohyun also did not miss a chance to notice the change of the look of it reflecting a little bit of hope to maybe change something in her life.

 

Ah, she loves staring at those eyes. She loved it too much she won’t care falling for it.  

 

A small laugh came out from with the thought of it. To think Seulgi had to hastily put a bill on the table although she settled it at the counter. She must have been so startled at her appearance or anything, her trembling hands says so.  Apparently, she was too lost at her own thoughts that you could tell she must have been letting her mind swallow her whole.

 

Joohyun folded the papers in half and put it back inside the lavender envelope. Her tea on the table was left untouched, deliberating whether to drink it first to relax or read the second letter inside the box. Of course, she decided to choose the latter.

 

Reading Seulgi’s letter will calm her anyways. Finally knowing all sort of things she couldn’t say out loud.

 

Calm but painful.

 

Leisurely putting the envelope aside, she now opened the second letter but was surprised to see a photo inside in it. The photo was too cute – it was as if she was still there remembering how she nagged the girl to take one. It was as if it only happened yesterday, where they were having awkward conversations because Seulgi is all over shy in front of her. Fortunately, her being persistent always wins. But hey don’t get it all wrong, she also knows her boundaries.

 

The photo were them being cute together. Seulgi’s rigid posture and a shy smile while she clung to her arm, she also leaned a bit on her shoulder after the count went to three for a cue that the photo will be taken.

 

Ah, it was really such a nice day for her. She wonders if she could grab a chance to go back to it. Joohyun will definitely take it.

 

So, the woman begins to read the second letter.

 

“Dearest Joohyun,

….

..."

 

Seulgi stayed up all night with the same thoughts that had stuck in her mind for days now. She and Joohyun would exchange conversations ever since that incident happened at her shop. The woman really likes to give her company even though she can only offer boring and uninteresting stories. However, the owner wouldn’t even mind listening to her so called boring and stupid jokes – she would usually laugh out of it as if she just heard the funniest one ever!

 

She also thinks that maybe Joohyun would react that way to pay her respect. Or was it because Seulgi can’t really be a comedian because good Lord, she’s a hundred percent no jam! But she’s not really sure about which reason was it. Maybe none of the above?

 

Back to the reason why she couldn’t sleep tonight, was she unknowingly told her about her grandmother who passed away just few weeks ago. Seulgi was too sorry to even kill the happy atmosphere that time when they chatted until dawn, talking about nonsense stuff, that she had to bring it up in a most unexpected way.

 

[1:13AM, Joohyun]: I’ve been meaning to ask, I’ve seen you often sketching aside from doing your work on your laptop. But nowadays, you stopped

[1:14AM, Joohyun]: Did something happen that made you to?

 

It was a question she expected from the woman. Knowing how she observes her ordering the same drink and would make sure to pick a spot beside the window to see the scenery in the street. She wondered when did Joohyun begun to do this, so maybe avoiding the question by asking her one would save her? Let’s see.

 

[1:15AM, Seulgi]: Just got no motivation to draw now

[1:15AM, Seulgi]: Anyway, you seem to be observing me most of the time, wondered when it started. Do you happened to have interest in me? :O

 

She really didn’t think through with the last message sent. She prays that Joohyun will not take it seriously. God, she just wanted to be funny in a natural way and also, why the hell does she type so fast?

 

[1:17AM, Joohyun]: Hahahaha funny Seulgi

[1:19AM, Joohyun]: So you really thought about that huh? What if I say yes? :P

 

Now, she’s thanking herself for being so stupid.

 

[1:22AM, Joohyun]: Honestly, I always find it interesting that you looked really enjoyed focusing on sketching

[1:23AM, Joohyun]: And also wondered why the look in your eyes says otherwise. It looked so, so sad

 

After she left the last message on read, her thoughts became deep again. Berating herself mentally for always being like this. It would be rude to leave Joohyun on read with the question. She also couldn’t come up with any excuses that would not let the woman ask questions back.

 

[1:27AM, Seulgi]: Yes, I enjoyed drawing. I was still practicing tho

 

And Seulgi continued typing while her emotions were all over the place.

 

[1:27AM, Seulgi]: I was about to give the portrait of my grandmother, knowing I found improvement with my work. But she passed away

 

Her hands were trembling, as she tries to take a deep breath. Who would have thought that sending such sentence would make her feel this way again? Seulgi’s been keeping it all this time but she also did not expect she would open it up to Joohyun like this.

 

Now she felt the wet hot tears filling up in her eyes.

 

Joohyun apologizes and said her condolence to her. She knows the other would be persistent enough to ask her questions about her late grandmother, but the woman did not. Seulgi is thankful that she also understands that she’s not ready to spill it out. Or did Joohyun felt like she’s not comfortable to talk about it yet?

 

With the thought of getting enough sleep and them having work to handle in a few hours, Seulgi decided to bid goodnight to the petite woman. She also has deadlines to meet or else her client would pester her with lots of demands. Thought she could just divert her thinking on her work for later and have a good sleep. But heavens, as much as she would love to, her mind won’t let her. So, the two hours of sleep.

 

Maybe she should at least think through before typing those messages. Again she questioned and blamed herself for being too fast at typing.

 

After that revelation from her, the kind Joohyun suggested if not, she could find other things she finds interesting to distract and enjoy herself. Joohyun didn’t pry at her after that night, nor she speaks that would remind her that. She always has this feeling that the woman is allowing her to mourn in her own way, not forcing her to just talk it all out. It felt so good to have a friend like Joohyun, knowing she’s being patient with her. But will she be able to express it in some other time? Seulgi’s sure she can’t even say what she feels, so speaking would be a bad idea for her.

 

So she decides to maybe write another letter where she could deliver her words to her.

 

Also wondered if she also has the courage to give it. Last time she checked, the first letter was still in her room. Yup, she’s a mess.

 

Just recently, she bought a camera to take photos when she’s not in the mood to draw. Seulgi is excited to share this newfound interest to her friend, whom she imagined would beam at her prettily looking at her being cheerful and all. Her advice did work, as so she tries to capture scenery as much as she could at her place, at the beach, or even in streets with people bustling. The lone woman starts to enjoy again holding this camera – it was as if she’s starting her life again.

 

She finished all her work and already sent the output to her client that day. Thinking she has still lot of time to laze around, she chose to go somewhere to at least to grab something to eat. She’s not that hungry, but she also noticed she haven’t eaten since the last four hours. Maybe getting a drink and sweet will fulfill her tummy.

 

“Welcome!”

 

Seulgi was greeted with a warm welcome by this adorable girl smiling brightly. The shop was not that crowded like the usual, the reason why she likes going here whenever she craves something sweet to dine in.

 

“The usual?” the same girl asked, waiting for her order to be noted.

 

“Ah, y-yes..”

 

She replied meekly. She thought she haven’t seen this girl before, is she perhaps a new part-timer?

 

“Alright, Kang Seulgi. That would be 11,000 won,”

 

And she knows her name too?

 

“Oh,” she smiles sheepishly, “thank you”

 

Rather than recalling whether she knew this girl or not, she went straight to her usual spot while waiting for her order.

 

Checking her emails through her phone to see any replies from her certain client, only to see nothing but a lot of messages contains job offers and her subscriptions of her apps she just paid recently. It had been days since she was too busy with this project that it prevented her to reply to all of Joohyun’s messages which of course, were a whole lot of questions asking if she’s doing fine and whatnot. Or asking if she got annoyed with bombarding her questions.

 

But who is she to complain? Why would she complain to Joohyun being cute and all? She also wonders if she’s really busy or not, but she remembers the woman mentioned she would leave messages to her in her free time.

 

Joohyun is as busy as she is too.

 

“Here’s your order” the girl at the counter placed her drink and cake on her table, couldn’t hide that she got startled for it a bit. Also a little inside of her thanking this girl for voluntarily serving the food. She prefers getting it at the counter though, but oh well.

 

“Thank you,” was all she can mutters,

 

She was about to dig in and slurp to her favorite frappe drink only to get distracted when the girl sat in front of her. Her both hands on the table, giving her this cheeky smile as her eyes speaks curiosity.

 

Okay, now she’s starting to get nervous for some reason.

 

“Name’s Yerim,” again she started, this time clearing , “of course I should introduce myself first before anything gets awkward.”

 

Seulgi blinked her eyes twice. Now she’s starting to ask questions mentally to herself. She decides, maybe taking a sip on her drink would be a good idea.

 

“So what do you do for a living?”

 

The poor woman had to stop feeling the liquid on choking her. Why is this girl asking her this question? She admits she did not expect that at all and also what’s with the question?

 

“Sorry,” the older replied, regaining back her posture “what was that again?”

 

“Yeah, I’m asking what you do for a living. You seem to be in our shop like, a lot”

 

Our shop she says? What relationship does this girl in front have with Joohyun?

 

Seulgi again, gulped on her drink before she answers, “Okay, I’m a freelancer”

 

“I do web designing and stuff,” she added.

 

Yerim clapped her hands lightly, showing she respected the older. Seulgi seemed to find it funny that all of her questions about this girl faded away just like that.

 

“Now that’s cool! You mean you can work all you want, anytime anywhere right?” another question asked, wondered if this girl prepared these at all.

 

Seulgi nodded with a smile plastered on her face. It felt odd having conversation with this unknown Yerim but surprisingly she’s comfortable enough to answer her curiosity. As if it would do bad answering her questions, right?

 

She looks around and noticed there’s no sight of Joohyun. She’s not at the counter either or wiping tables after customers left the cups and plates on the table. Hmm, maybe she got out somewhere? She haven’t receive any messages from her though and speaking of it, she did not send one either. Maybe a little text would do?

 

“Oh, before I forget” Yerim snaps her fingers demanding the elder’s attention, “Joohyun unnie went out today. She said to give you some macaroons,”

 

“Don’t worry, it’s for free. Let me just get it for you”

 

The younger stood up slowly without forgetting to beam at her. She didn’t wait for her answer as she went straight ahead inside a room where a signage says “Authorized Personnel Only” on the door.

 

Yerim came back with a brown bag containing the food she mentioned earlier. Placing the bag on the table with her still very much amusing smile, Seulgi thought the beaming one would leave her alone after the small talk they had asking questions about herself. But no, she’s wrong. The younger instead seated again on the chair she was on earlier and asked another question that made her cheeks blush so hard.

 

And of course, the great Yerim didn’t miss this chance to tease the shy woman.

 

“Do you like my sister, Joohyun unnie?”

 

Now the liquid from her frappe drink made her choke again, this time worst. She coughs hard but that did not stop Yerim,

 

“You have the right to not answer it,” the girl laughed making the other caught beet in red yet again, still calming herself before she sips another in her drink.

 

Now that she’s calmer, she heaves a big sigh. No wonder this girl knows her, Joohyun must have told her about herself to the girl. Thinking about it, she noticed some resemblance of them – talking very brightly with their lovely attitude and smiles attractively it could blind you in a good way. They also have the same hopeful and pretty eyes; it does so much speak curiosity. The only difference is that this girl is much louder than her big sister, but isn’t Joohyun too loud when she laughs too? Maybe not that much difference but the fact that they are sisters, they are indeed much alike.

 

Not that she’s complaining but she really loves the way Joohyun laughs.

 

Seulgi was about to ask her sister’s whereabouts, she plans on staying here until the woman comes. She really is that excited to see her – but she can wait, she have the rest of the night to. She cleared again to begin her question, however the younger in front was looking somewhere else- her brows narrowed as her lips pursed. Did she saw something unpleasant or?

 

“Wait a minute…” the girl stated, “why is she here?”

 

She turned her head to where her vision is – there she saw a few costumers on the other tables chattering. She looks back at Yerim still with a question mark on her expression, wondered if she saw a ghost or perhaps someone she doesn’t want to see?

 

Ah, maybe someone she knows. But nevermind, she opt to just maybe send Joohyun a text saying she’s waiting for her knowing the girl in front is somehow busy with other matters.

 

“I’ll get back to you Seulgi unnie” she says, tapping the table but still her gaze at nowhere she could determine, “this is going to be fun”

 

Yerim took a slow steps coming towards to a girl seated, covering her half of her face with a newspaper while her sight fixated at the counter – where she divert at it to see Joohyun’s bestfriend assisting customers with their orders.

 

“Well, well! Look what we have here,”

 

She turned her head to Yerim again talking to the girl, slowly placing the newspaper at the table with a very unamused face. The girl was tall, have this fierce look on her and just around Yerim’s age. Are they friends? But what’s with the gazes?

 

“Why is the great oh so lovely Park Sooyoung here in this shop?”

 

The other rolled her eyes before letting out a big frustrating sigh, now crossing her arms finally lifting her head to the figure who approached her.

 

“Alright, I really am so sorry about your book. I will replace it, I promise.” The taller one said in an annoying way, not really sincere with her words.

 

“So you’re here to say sorry? That’s new!” the shorter exclaims

 

Seulgi chuckled at the sight, she guessed they must be friends who loves to bicker. She shook her head lightly before typing a message for Joohyun.

 

[5:29PM, Seulgi]: Hey, I’m at your shop and your sister told me you went out somewhere. I’ll wait for you, I have something to tell

 

After sending the message, the woman continued to listen to the other girls. This is really entertaining for her, but not like she’s eavesdropping. It’s just that she has ears to listen and the girls are not that far from where she seated.

 

“Don’t tell me…”

 

“Shh!”

 

The last thing she saw was that the taller friend of Yerim shushed her by covering her hand on . She wondered what the beaming girl did for her to do that.

 

“Waiting for Joohyun?” Seungwan asked, already done with serving the drinks. A tray still in her hands while she waits for her reply,

 

“Yeah, I didn’t know she’s not here” Seulgi lifted her face a bit, mirroring the expression Seungwan gave to her.

 

“She’ll be back anytime now. Have you received her gift yet?”

 

“Yup, and oh!” she quickly grabs the macaroons inside the bag, “I should taste it and say my thanks to her”

 

Seungwan smiled, still standing “Do you know she made it herself? That it makes me think she really loves doing things for you”

 

She smiled inwardly at the comment but her flushing cheeks and her ears turning pink wouldn’t really allow her to hide it. Sometimes words are too much, and there are a lot of comments or questions she got caught off guard just for this day. Why are people in this shop likes to fluster her?

 

“I-” she likes to reply but she got all so shy that she halted.

 

“Seungwan unnie!” thankfully, Yerim called her so she sets her attention to the younger.

 

Sometimes she really needs a savior for comments just like what Seungwan did. She can’t really reply to those nor she’s able to answer it right away. Please, have mercy on her!

 

After saying her excuses to Seulgi, the short haired woman went towards the younger which she knows with her calm and approachable facial. Seungwan is like an angel, she really is so kind. Picturing out her expression, she glimpsed at the other who seemed to be panicking internally as the woman comes nearer to them – giving death glances to Yerim who’s just smiling widely as she introduces them to each other.

 

“Unnie this is Sooyung, my friend,” the younger stood up, her hand clung onto the elder’s arm, “she needs help looking for a job.”

 

Sooyoung widen her eyes – her hand clenched. Her expression says otherwise, maybe what she stated was a lie. But can you really tell?

 

“I did not said-”

 

“Shh relax my friend! My unnie Seungwan here is really kind” she reassures, more like teasing the taller one.

 

Yerim leaned closer to the elder’s ear, obviously going to whisper something to her so the other couldn’t hear. But her voice was playful and loud, maybe not too loud but good enough for Seulgi and Sooyoung to hear. Bet the other customers could too.

 

“She really needs to save up money for next semester. And she really is just too timid on her own”

 

Now the younger pulls herself, she set her attention to the taller one whose apparently just wanted to choke and kill her with the way she stares at her. If only eyes could kill, Yerim is probably dead right now. Lord, please forgive this innocent girl.

 

Seulgi got distracted from the rare sight of the scene when her phone chimes indicating she received a message.

 

[5:41PM, Joohyun]: Alright, on my way back to the shop

[5:43PM, Joohyun]: Also hoping you’ll like my gift ;)

 

And now she thought about what Seungwan said to her.

 

“…..I never thought I could be this comfortable at your shop. You see, I was too nervous when I got there only to be greeted with an unfamiliar girl whom I thought was a new part-timer, turns out it was your younger sister, Yerim. I liked the vibe she’s giving me, it is like I wanted to have a sister like her too. Not that I would steal her away from you, I just get jealous with the thought that I couldn’t get to enjoy things when I was her age. In fact, it made me think that why I did not live my teenage self the way your sister does? Too many questions but life has not given me answers yet. Or maybe I am only doing this to myself?

 

Yerim also told me a secret and to not tell anyone – it’s about her friend Sooyung who apparently has a crush on Seungwan. I didn’t know your sister could be this playful, I thought she could get killed by her with the lie she said to your bestfriend. I really tried my best not to laugh at the sight of them bickering, they are just way too adorable to see….

….

..

.”

 

Joohyun came back around few minutes after, Seulgi got excited to see the woman who smiled at her the moment she sighted her sitting, now left with a glass of water on the table. The petite woman also likes the way Seulgi beams then her eyes forming crescent – she’s too cute on her own.

 

Noticing the other was holding a camera in her hand, she decides to initiate the conversation because she knows, Seulgi wouldn’t even utter a single word when she’s around. She really is too shy but she wouldn’t mind coming up a topic just to have a conversation with her.

 

The longer the better.

 

“New camera?” she asked, sitting next beside the timid woman

 

Seulgi being by herself, bowed down her head as if collecting her brain cells to come up with words to utter. She got so excited to see Joohyun but now that she’s already here, she got really speechless having her around. Remembering Seungwan’s and Yerim’s words did not help either.

 

“What photos did you take?” again it was added with another one. Soon questions will be piled up, so she must respond back,

 

“Just scenery,” she says, “and this is what I wanted to tell you”

 

Joohyun’s brows lifted, having this expression to allow her to continue her story.

 

“You said I could try things I might get interested in to enjoy myself, so I bought one”

 

“Found it fascinating to take photos, so the try” she continues.

 

“Are you enjoying it?”

 

Seulgi was scanning the photos she took for few days. She admits, she enjoys taking random stuff with her camera even not having a single idea about the rules to have a perfect shot. She can study it later, for now she just wants to focus on enjoying things freely.

 

“Definitely!” she responded enthusiastically, “and thanks to you. For the macaroons too”

 

The woman chuckled lovingly as Seulgi showed the photos taken. She’s still not confident with the output but still, what matters is she is enjoying it. She also likes it that Joohyun is so considerate with the things she wanted to try.

 

“Now that you’ve mentioned it, why don’t we take a photo of you tonight?” Joohyun asked, making the other flinch a bit with the sudden thought.

 

“Oh, I’m not really photogenic so…” she replies while flailing her hands saying she disagrees with the idea

 

But Joohyun knows she would say it, so she retorts, “Too bad I like your smile the most,” then laughed when she saw how Seulgi got all flustered with the comment

 

“Okay how about a photo together?”

 

The shy woman couldn’t say no this time, not when Joohyun is staring at her like she hangs the stars in the sky. She would lie to herself saying she didn’t want to, because honestly, she’s too weak to say no to the woman whenever she pleases. You can’t just say no to this beautiful woman. You can’t if it’s Bae Joohyun.

 

Luckily Yerim came out from the room to greet her sister who just came back, her elder sister asked to take a photo of them together. It was visible to the younger’s face that she loved the idea, not to mention how her lips turned upwards as her eyes glittery whne she got the camera.  Oh, Seulgi will forever be blushing if people around her are being like this.

 

Again, she’s not complaining.

 

Seulgi’s red face were so obvious. It got worst when the petite woman clung to her arm making her body stiff for a while. She really isn’t used with skin ship so maybe her body is reacting this way. It did not help either when Joohyun leaned her head on her shoulder as the younger cue to take a shot. Now as if her body malfunctioned, she also felt the electricity ran through her veins.

 

Glad she managed to smile, but it was still awkward.

 

She sighs in relief when the other stood up to check the photo taken by her sister. Feeling her body relax, she smiled looking at them with satisfactory she haven’t felt all her life.

 

" ….

..

….it did not come across my mind that taking photos would be this enjoyable. I kept taking one after another, and another each day. Thanks to you I could somehow try new things I thought I wouldn’t be able to. Also believe me, when you said we could take a photo together, I did not mean to react that way when you clung onto me. I’m not blaming you for being clingy, it just that I’m not used to it. But I bet you’re someone who likes clinging arms or holding hands, I assure you I will get used to it anytime.

 

I also like to give this first photo of us together – you can do anything you want with it or make it a memento perharps? I admit, this is something special for me. Don’t worry, I have my own copy, I just thought you would ask to have one so I’m giving this photo along with the letter.

 

I’m really having fun around you Joohyun. I hope we could take a lot of memories and photos together with this camera.

 

Yours,

Seulgi”