Chapter 11 

Cornered 

The next morning he got ready for school like usual, Seunghoon greeted him sleepily before leaving early which left him to himself to eat breakfast. He and Mino would be going to school together for once as Mino had messaged him asking if he too got a morning lecture. 

Meeting in the hall to walk to the bus together they were both wrapped in several layers of warm clothes. Mino stopped him just as he was about to open the front door, pulling on his scarf. 

    "Just one thing before we go" he said before pulling him in closer by the tight grip he got on his scarf. 

    "What?" he asked confused, already mentally bracing himself to face the cold weather outside. 

Instead of saying anything had Mino leaned in for a kiss, first just a quick peck on the lips but after a moments pause had he gone in for another one. It didn’t take long for all thoughts of the weather to evaporate from his mind, every thought overtaken by Mino’s ever dominating presence. 

Soon he had detangled his already cold hands from his oversized sweater and coat pockets to cup Mino’s face gently between the palms of his hands. 

    "We’ll miss the bus" Mino mumbled between their many soft kisses. 

    "We better hurry then" he replied, but made no move to pull away. 

It was only when they heard someone come walking down the stairs from the apartments above them they finally broke apart. Grabbing Mino’s hand in his he threw his scarf back around his neck before dragging Mino along with him into the crips autumn morning.

The bus to campus was always super crowded in the mornings and today was no exception, but he didn’t mind standing around swaying when he could do it next to Mino. At one moment had Mino grabbed him by the waist to stop himself from toppling over and that had been enough to send butterflies swarming all over his insides. Smiling over at Mino he found him to already be looking at him which gave all the more power to the already fluttering butterflies.

They kept exchanging glances like that through out the entire trip as the place was too crowded for a proper conversation. 

When they said their goodbyes by Mino’s lecture hall was he well aware that he might not see him for a couple of days as they both got packed schedules. That left him with a sinking feeling as he walked down the hall towards the campus square, a feeling that grew stronger as he ran into the date wreckers from the restaurant on his way out. 

The thought of Mino spending every day with girls who were so obviously attracted to him made his stomach turn. He trusted Mino, but were Mino to be blamed if he decided he preferred girls after all? 

He spent the first part of his lecture pondering this instead of paying attention before finally managing to pull himself together. 

The rest of his school day flew by. He had plans to keep working on a paper before the meeting at the radio club in the afternoon when he remembered his promise to Zico. They never agreed on a time and so he texted him to ask. 

    "I’m free now, but later works too" Zico replied after a couple of minutes. 

    "I’m on my way, but where to?" he asked heading towards the cafeteria to get himself something to eat knowing he would be busy all afternoon. 

Standing in line he spotted Mino with his usual crowd, Jihoon at the forefront and the girls from before trailing after them. It felt strange watching Mino like this, it made him feel unimportant and a bit lonely. He had made an effort to befriend his classmates too, but they were all calm and polite with each other still. Nothing like Mino with his slightly rowdy crowd joking around laughing. 

A small part of him wanted to walk over and say hi on his way out, but he promised to help Zico and there weren’t that much time until the radio club meeting. 

Turning his back on Mino and his friends he started on the walk across campus to the recording rooms in some barracks at the opposite end of campus from the cafeteria. 

A good ten minutes later and he was unwrapping himself from his jacket and scarf in the studio where Zico looked to have been working all day judging by the mess of notes, papers and books piled around him. 

He had thought to bring them both coffee and the way Zico’s face lit up when he saw the coffee almost made him laugh. 

Zico had been working on their song ever since they last met and the result was amazing. He made sure to praise it according to his opinion of it, but he couldn’t see what it was Zico wanted to change. 

In the end had it only been a couple of lines in the beginning that needed a tempo change, but once he was done had Zico asked if he could help him with some guitar recordings for another one of his projects. 

That took them a good couple of hours to finish, but the time had flown by so quickly he was shocked when he saw the time. 

    "I’m sorry but I need to start thinking about getting over to the radio club. This was really fun though, I feel like I’ve learned a lot!" he said putting away the guitar Zico had borrowed from the performing arts faculty. 

    "Before you go, just one more thing" Zico said getting up from his chair. He had just picked up his things from a chair by the door when Zico started walking closer.

    "Sure?" he replied stopping to listen to what Zico had to say. 

Zico looked like he was hesitating for a moment, looking at his hands and shifting his weight from one foot to another before he spoke.

    "I know you like Mino, and that he likes you" Zico began and it looked like he was struggling hard to keep eye contact. The way his voice shook made him feel slightly uncomfortable. 

    "I know that you know, Mino told me" he responded wondering what this was about. 

    "What Mino probably didn’t tell you when he told you about that conversation was that I told him that I like you too" Zico said, looking away out the nearest window as he said the last part, voice slightly trembling. 

    "Oh, no he didn’t. When was this?" he asked suddenly feeling a little sick. 

    "Before our trip to the cinema" Zico responded turning his focus right back at him. Those piercing eyes staring right into his soul. 

    "I honestly didn’t know. I’m so sorry" he confessed, his thoughts churning away at rapid speed trying to think about every moment the three of them had spent together where Mino knew and he didn’t. 

    "Don’t be sorry. You didn’t know because I didn’t tell you. It’s not really as if I wanted Mino to tell you for me anyway" Zico said taking another step closer. 

His mind was screaming for him to take a step back, but still processing all the suffering Zico must have gone through being with them the previous weeks he simply couldn’t. 

    "I’m not expecting you to give me an answer of any kind, I’ll deal with my emotions on my own. Just know that I am here for you" Zico said reaching out a hand towards Seungyoon's face as he spoke, brushing a couple of strands of hair out of his eyes. 

Zico's hand lingered on his cheek for a moment before taking a step back. 

    "I can wait for you" Zico said before smiling a small smile that felt incredibly forced. He liked Zico a lot, but not in the same way he liked Mino. Not that he had ever tried to think of Zico that way either, but now it was too late he wouldn’t allow himself to go down that road considering everything he got with Mino already. 

    "I’m sorry, I, we.." suddenly the evening on the bus sprung to the forefront of his mind. With the scarf, and the kiss marks. "It was inconsiderate of him, knowing how you felt. At the cinema and everything" he felt a strong urge to just keep apologizing, probably because he knew he couldn’t even give Zico a chance. 

He remembered Mino standing by the glass with his own handprints above his head tauntingly.. Mino must have known exactly what he was doing back then and it made him angry. There was no reason to rub it in like that.  

    "I honestly don’t know what to tell you, I feel really bad" he began apologizing yet again, feeling sick to his stomach about how they had acted. 

    "Please don’t, I don’t want you to associate negative feelings with me because of this. You didn’t know right?" he nodded to confirm what Zico was saying, he folded his arms across his chest and unfolded them again. 

He was at a loss for what to do, because of his friendship with Zico, what he had learned from him and everything they had done together was something he really treasured. About to apologize yet again he had just opened his mouth when Zico pressed a finger to his lips. 

    "No more apologizing, It’s fine" he then leaned in.. And kissed him. 

Unable to fathom what was happening at first he blinked hard and before he could step away had Zico pulled back. His heart was racing and the uncomfortable nausea that had lingered in him ever since Zico’s confession burst up into full blown physical sickness. 

    "Apology accepted" Zico said before straightening up and turning around to start tidying up his things. 

Still not able to force his thoughts into actual words he stuttered something about being late before picking up his things and bursting out the door. 

He was overwhelmed by his own feelings and so he didn’t know what to do with himself. He felt betrayed by Zico for taking it this far, but he still somehow felt heartbroken for him. 

He was scared to tell Mino about what had happened too, because he should have rejected Zico better. What would become of the two roommates friendship after this? He stopped in the middle of the hall wondering if he actually was about to throw up.

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