Characters: Park Bom, TOP

It’s that smell again. I smell corn. And just from the smell, I can already tell who it is.

“Oppa.” Her sweet voice called my name. I turn to the direction of her voice. I just can imagine how her face looks like when she calls me that and I smiled at the memory. turns into a cute pout while her eyes only show happiness and glee. “Are you nervous?” she asked.

Nervous? That’s right. Today will be my surgery. My eyes were impaired when I got us in an accident. In a few hours, I’ll be getting a new pair of eyes. I’m most grateful on whoever gave me those. It took them a day just to find a donor. My parents told me that normally, it takes a week or two to find a donor. And my surgery was scheduled a week after that. I told myself I was lucky. That person gave me a second chance to see the love of my life – Park Bom. I felt Bommie’s hand intertwine in mine and I felt more secured than ever.

I requested to get my daily dose of sunshine and the nurse accompanied me in my wheelchair to the hospital grounds. I can smell the flowers in full bloom and that lingering smell of corn tells me that Bom is still at my side. When I woke up from the accident, I can’t see. It scared me to death. But what scared me most was when no one would tell me what happened to her. I was relieved when she visited me a few hours after I woke up. I knew it was her. I can tell from the scent of sweet corn I knew she must have eaten before she visited me.

“Oppa,” It was not her voice. It sounded like a little girl’s voice and that cute little voice asked, “I got a camera for my birthday. Can I take a photo of you?”

A photo. I missed taking photos. I’m a photographer. It was a hobby that became a business. Some say that my photos have a nostalgic effect. Through pictures, memories are stored and can never be forgotten.

I still remember when I first met Bom. I was in my last year of senior high when her family moved beside our house. It was love at first sight. I stole a shot of her, and until now I still keep it beside my bed. She was round and had a chubby face. I playfully Bbap Bom, or Rice Bom, wordplay of her full name. Bom never took it against me though. She then made a nickname for me, TOP, because of the haircut I had back then. We’ve been friends ever since.

Bom for me was full of surprises. She and her family went on a long vacation and when she came back, she looked like a porcelain doll. From the plump, round girl I knew, she came back as a goddess. Her mother later confessed to me that Bom spent her vacation days working out and toning her body muscles. The moment I saw Bom, I hugged her tight and told her that plump or not, I will still love her. We became a couple that day forward.

Bom took culinary arts as her course in college and I chose film and photography. When we graduated college, we put up a business using her talents and mine. Bom and I are hired to do wedding stuff--mine would be the photos and hers would be the cake. She always loved the sweet stuff, but her favorite will always be sweet corn. I always knew if she ate one, because she’ll smell like that all day. And I like it because it is part of her.

“Oppa,” The little girl must be tired waiting for my answer because she started tugging my hand. I nodded and said, “Okay. Okay. What camera are you using?”

The little girl giggled. “I don’t know. But the picture comes right after you take one.” A Polaroid. I smiled and said, “Give me a copy okay?” I heard the little girl say yes. I pulled Bom closer to me and she went behind me. Bom wrapped her hands around my torso and with my free hand, I held her hand that was resting on my shoulder. When the little girl handed me the Polaroid shot, I thanked her.

“I wish I could see now.” I told Bom when we got to my room. Bom chuckled and said, “TOP-oppa, the surgery will be today, so be patient.” She then bade her goodbye and before the scent of corn left, I told her, “When they get the bandage off of my eyes, I want you to be the first one I’ll see, okay?”

“Araso.” Then I heard the door close. The truth is I want her to stay by my side, but I also know she must have had injuries from the accident. She probably snuck out of her room just to see me.

We went to the countryside to attend a common friend’s wedding. They let Bom bake their cake and I take their pictures for the dress rehearsal. At the dress rehearsal, the bride told Bom to try one dress on the rack and she shyly put one on. And when she came out of the fitting room, it took the wind out of me. She looked breathtaking and from that moment, I thought of how I was going to propose to her. I decided to tell her about it the moment we come back to the city.

We never made it. We got into an accident on the way. The last thing I remembered from the accident was the smell of corn coming from the stash I bought for her that day.

When the doctors came for me, I asked my sister to have the photo given to me framed. I told her to place it near my bed. She said yes and they wheeled me in the operating room. I was very nervous and happy at the same time. When this ends, I’ll be able to see Bom again.

It’s been days since she last visited me. The surgery was successful, and I thought she’ll be there after. She never came and I was feeling a little neglected. I hear the door opening and the voices of doctors and nurses who will remove the bandage from my eyes and check if I could see. I heard my parent’s voice and my sister’s. In the far corner, I can hear Bommie’s parents talking. I can’t hear Bom’s though. And I was starting to worry about her.

After they removed the bandage and the gauze, I was given instructions. They told me to open my eyes slowly, and let it adjust to the light. I nodded and slowly opened my eyes. The light seemed to blur my vision and I wanted to rub my eyes, but the doctor gave stern instructions not to rub them. So I focused my eyes on the picture my sister have placed near the bed. That way, the first face I’ll see will be Bom’s.

I didn’t see her. The only person in that picture was me. I was holding my shoulder instead of her hand. I wept.

How could it be? I’m pretty sure she was there with me when the photo was taken. I remember holding her hand, and instead, the picture showed me holding my shoulder. By then, my vision has returned to normal and I can already see everybody in the room. Still, Bom was not there.

“Where’s Bom?” I asked to no one in particular. “Where is she?”

I watched their faces contort into confusion. My mother inched near to my bed and wiped my tears which were flowing generously on my cheeks. She let out in one sentence the thing I dread the most. “Bommie’s dead, Seung-hyun.”

Bom is dead. The love of my life is gone. But this doesn’t make sense. Nothing makes sense to me. Now they are telling me that she died a couple of hours before I woke up. How could she be, when she was just with me the past few days?

Bom’s father told me that her condition was much worse than I was. Upon learning that I would lose my eyesight, she requested her eyes be given to me upon her death. The eyes that helped me see again are hers. Tears flowed again on my cheeks. I closed my eyes again, hoping that when I open them, she will be there in front of me, smiling and alive.

I don’t smell her, I don’t smell corn. And I cried knowing she'll never be at my side, ever again.