“It’s been months Baekhyun, don’t count on a letter from him.” Chen rolled his eyes, cuffing his dirty sleeves back.

“I’m not counting on anything. I’m simply hoping. Don’t you have work to do?” Baekhyun continued to flip through pages of job applications.

People had come from all round to help with the war effort. Especially those who weren’t able to go to war. Whether it be a disability or of old age. He found people who felt guilty they couldn't help the nation came here to the weapon factory to help out in any way they could.

Chen was one of them. Baekhyun had accepted him to work in the factory when he found out that he too suffered a disability that involved his leg. Except, his leg had completely been severed off. His amputation was a miracle and to Baekhyun he couldn’t help but feel immense pain knowing that that could have been him too.

They soon became close friends and Baekhyun told him about everything about himself. 

“I’m off then,” Chen slowly limped off to the door with his crutch.

When Baekhyun was alone in his office, he made sure to close the curtains of one of the windows behind him. He limped to the door and slightly opened to check if anyone was outside. Then, he quietly twisted the lock.

Sighing, he sat back on his seat and massaged his temples.

A lot had changed since he’d left the village.

Ever since he had come to run the factory he found himself degrading from stress. The job, the environment, the smell of dynamite and tar. Keeping up with such a large business was not easy alone and with a disability. People treated him differently here like he was just some spoiled rich boy. It was overwhelming. He couldn’t help but want to bask in quiet for a moment. He had been used to the loneliness after all.

His parents rarely visited which he preferred. Baekhyun had full control over the company within 6 months. His father started getting too ill to stand around in the factory all day so he decided it was best to retire.

Baekhyun finally stood from his chair and shuffled over to the file cabinets where he stored very important business letters. He had a lock made for the topmost drawer where he kept his one and only true secrets.

Chanyeol's letters.

However, at this point, they weren't such a secret. Baekhyun was grateful to find Chen so that could gush about Chanyeol all night long when they work late nights. He told him everything. From the time they met to the time they bid farewell. And since then, Chanyeol had been writing him letters to him every two weeks.

Except for this month.

Chanyeol's letters were hard to miss. He had a habit of using red wax on the opening and stamping it with a beautifully embroidered design. One time he had even sent a red rose that had died on its way to Baekhyun. Nonetheless it made him flush the same colour.

But today...there was no letter to be found. Not in the mailbox nor when the mailman had delivered it this morning.

Baekhyun looked visibly distressed throughout the day. He was pacing around his office, and now he had locked himself in his office.

Unlocking the top drawer, he gently withdrew one of the letters Chanyeol had sent him the first month in. They all looked open but had been neatly placed in an organized pile. Baekhyun opened the recent one and read it to himself;

Dear Baekhyun,

It’s a shame really that you’re not here to enjoy the carrot stew I made. Sooyoung loves it but she wishes you were here too.

I’ve made changes around the house. The roof’s shingles I switched out and I’ve made a walkway with small blue flowers. I got the flowers from a gardener he told me they were called “forget me not”. I planted them for you.

The sky grows darker and darker as the war goes on. I haven’t seen a sunny day since Sooyoung was born. I hope this ends.

I hope we meet again, my love.

Yours truly, Chanyeol.

Baekhyun chokes back his tears reading the last line. He’s read this letter for weeks now and he always feel like weeping.

Suddenly, there a knock on his door.

He hastily put the letters back into the cabinet, remembering to lock it. He curiously limped towards his door with his crutch. Who could it be?

When he opened it, a bored looking man held out an envelope. Baekhyun tried not to show it but he immediately felt his heart beat quicker. He didn’t have time to process what the envelope looked like, if it was even from Chanyeol.

He opened it, ripping off the top.

But it wasn’t Chanyeol’s. There was no red wax. It was merely a business letter. Baekhyun had gotten his hopes up. Perhaps Chen was right, it was best not to count on anything.

---------------------------------------------------------------

It had been 8 months now. Baekhyun was offered to build another manufacturing company near the front lines. He’d be offered double by the government and given special benefits after the war ended. He didn’t care for it, but his parents made sure he signed the contract.

The military general thought it would be a better idea to have weapons right beside the war front where personnel could easily have access to guns, grenades of sorts. Working here, it wasn’t much different.

It still smelled like nitroglycerin and perhaps even worse. He heard explosions and guns firing every day. He heard screams and howls in the eerie night. He began to understand why the government was offering him so much money.

Baekhyun had grown used to it. He had even grown used to seeing injured soldiers being carried out into stretchers towards the infirmary in the buildings around the weapon factory. There was blood everywhere on the mud outside. It had all dried up when the sun rose in the morning. It smelled vile here, it felt vile.

“Here,” Chen tossed him a glass bottle of whiskey.

Baekhyun caught it, immediately opening it and chugging it whole.

Chen sat down on the chair in front of him, drinking out of his beverage sparingly.

“Slow down there kiddo.” Chen chuckled teasingly.

“I’m not a child.” He wiped his mouth with his sleeve.

“Listen, I understand you’re stressed, but I think I have something that could cheer you up.”

Baekhyun crossed his arms, visibly annoyed, “What?”

“Well...my buddies at the factory were planning to go out tonight. Have a few drinks. The usual. Except this place...it’s got some gorgeous ladies. Apparently, they're for the soldiers but...we could get ourselves-”

“Oh shut up, would you. I’m not interested.” Baekhyun snapped.

“Jesus Christ. Fine, just come for the drinks. No one's forcing anything’ on ya.” Chen held his hands up as a surrender.

Baekhyun sighed deeply. Fiddling with his fingers wondering if this was a good idea. He was considered underaged, but everything about his existence was illegal. So what? Everyone was to die in the war anyway. It wouldn’t hurt to get drunk just this once.

--------------------------------------------------

The rain was heavy tonight. That did not stop Chen and Baekhyun as they walked along the deep mud towards what looked like a brothel. In the front were very drunk looking soldiers. They shoved each other playfully, hiccuping at the sound of a grenade going off.

“This place is disgusting,” Baekhyun whispered.

Chen nodded, eyes gleaming, “Exactly my friend.”

They found the workers at the factory all toasting with a mug of beer. Some had gone drunk and were sleeping on the tables while other were joking around. There were only a few lights on, but Baekhyun could still see the women.

They were wearing tight black clothes with black pantyhose underneath. They all had dark makeup painted over their eyes, and bright red lipstick. They wandered around, offering drinks to young men who looked crazed from the war.

Baekhyun ignored the women although many had tried to approach him. He decided to walk over to the bar to ask for the strongest whiskey they had but as he approached the bartender he heard a chilling voice.

“A cup of gin please,” A deep voice asked in front of him.

Baekhyun held his breath, feeling like his ribcage would explode just by hearing the low voice he so deeply yearned for.

It was then when the familiar man turned around in his army green jumper, looking startled to see a young man standing in front of him.

“I can’t believe it’s you.” Baekhyun held back his tears.

----------------------------

Chanyeol, the man he so deeply loved looked just as handsome and manly the day he left the village. He was sporting military attire now. Baekhyun frowned at the clothes. Had he been conscripted after he left?

“Baekhyun...I- what are you doing here?” He asked while the bartender handed him the gin drink.

Baekhyun remained as stern as possible. He’d prepared for this moment just not in this environment. He felt strange standing here seeing Chanyeol with his own eyes. It felt like a dream.

“I should ask you the same,” Baekhyun managed to say.

Chanyeol seemed speechless. His eyes, blinking only a few times. There was a moment of nervousness that passed in his expression one that Baekhyun noticed.

“What's the matter?” Baekhyun asked, surprised that Chanyeol hadn’t said anything.

“I...just didn’t plan to see you here. At this...time…” Chanyeol sputtered.

“What do you mean-”

He stopped when he saw a woman approach the two. She was wearing a red silk dress and her makeup was considerably different from the rest of the showgirls.

“I’ve prepared the bed for us…” She smiled suggestively.

Baekhyun’s eyes followed her painted red nails as they trailed down Chanyeol's neck and across his chest. At that moment Baekhyun hadn’t felt more idiotic. It felt like a metal rod had been stuck through his chest, he couldn’t take it any longer.

He stormed out of the brothel, his crutch making the floor beneath him creak.

The world deafened around him, he could only make out someone call out his name behind him.