#2: wedding shenanigans

Tags: Modern Day AU, Established Relationship

Notes: mild crack?

Summary: Yeri plans for a wedding. Things… go well?  

"Sooyoung-ah. Do you think that there is something that they're not telling us?"

Sooyoung looks up from her book, frowning to express some displeasure at being interrupted, but honestly, she didn't really mind. The book was skull-numbingly dull anyway.

"They?"

"Yeah! Seulgi and Joohyun have been... have been so... happy recently!" Yeri throws her hands up in exasperation as she finally finds the correct adjective. "They're never like this! Doesn't it get on your nerves at all?"

Sooyoung returns to making a show out of reading her book. "Hardly. They're totally allowed to live their lives."

"God. No – you don't get it do you? They've been so damned chummy with each other – which reminds me – was that a ring on Seulgi's finger that I saw?"

Yeri continues pacing, furiously. 

Sooyoung can't really feign any further interest in her book anymore. "What are you saying?”

"Yeah! It's a small thing – but it's finally on that finger..."

"Don't tell me you're jealous," Sooyoung jibes with a laugh.

"Me? Jealous? Of course not!" Yeri laughs, slightly forced. "Okay, maybe a little, but... I'm not sure whether I should be more jealous of Joohyun-unnie or Seulgi-unnie."

"How about neither?" Seungwan says as she walks into the room, balancing three cups in her small hands. "You claimed that you're definitely over your little crush on Seulgi, and well, Seulgi's just as lucky that she's finally... what – did you say a ring?"

Yeri exclaims, "Yeah! Like, dude, I know they're both beautiful and but like hey they finally got together–"

"–And one of those idiots got their act together enough to pop the question?" Sooyoung's voice is laced with such incredulity.

"I mean, who would have thought they would get engaged before the entire planet crashes and burns and we all starve to death, right?" Yeri finishes.

"Fair enough..." Seungwan slowly sets the cups down onto the desk. "So... this is relevant because…?"

"We should plan a wedding for them!" Yeri cries out, jumping at where she's standing. "God, that's a great idea. Why didn't I think of it before?"

"Hmm." 

"Err, hang on. What makes you so sure they want to get married so quickly?"

"Shush, Seungwan-unnie. Why not? They're in love and they are engaged, and they've known each other for more than a stupid decade – of course they need to get married! Heck, my parents got married in less than half that time – not that it was their best idea but whatever. Anyway–"

"Why don't we plan something else instead, like... a bachelorette's party? Wouldn't that make more sense?" Sooyoung interjects.

Yeri scoffs, shaking her head. "Why not we just do both?"

"I don't think–"

"Seungwan-unnie, are you in this, or are you not?" Sooyoung's eyes grow steely and Seungwan lets out a sigh that spoke of ten years of long-suffering.

"I still think that maybe we should ask Joohyun or Seulgi what they want before–"

“Shut up. Don’t spoil the fun.”

“Yeah, you’re either with us, or you aren’t.”

Seungwan sighs again, throwing her hands up. “Fine, fine. But if something goes wrong...”

“Don’t worry. We’ll sort it all out,” Yeri grins, brightly, and Seungwan wonders just what the hell she signed up for.

––––––––––––

The plans swing into motion.

Yeri throws together a contact list of all of Seulgi and Joohyun’s friends. The list grows too long. Sooyoung slashes out some names. Sooyoung wonders if she should slash out more names. But Seulgi collects female friends like Sally collects seashells on the beach or something. Oh well. They both know that if Joohyun’s the one putting the list together, none of them would be invited for this party. With the exception of Moonbyul and Yongsun, possibly. But Yongsun’s more of Joohyun’s friend, and god, why do they have so many overlapping friend circles?

Seungwan comes up with an entire working plan. There is a list and there are bulleted points and things that are bolded and/or underlined all throughout the Microsoft Word and PowerPoint documents she has drawn up.

Yeri rolls her eyes at the PowerPoint. Sooyoung’s the one that actually comments on how pointless it is, since they’re throwing an impromptu quick celebration together, and they certainly didn’t need a thirty slides long presentation deck.

They let Seungwan go ahead with her plans though.

Within the week, Yeri manages to convince Sunny to pull enough strings for them to secure a venue. Seungwan’s full repertoire of caterers was narrowed down. They find enough entertainers. Yeri makes Taeyeon draw an invitation, which she promptly sends to Seulgi and Joohyun.

––––––––––––

“Joohyun-ah,” Seulgi coos. “You look very cute like that.”

“Eung?” Joohyun makes a noise, surprised. “You like these pink pjs?”

“I like anything you wear. Or don’t, for that matter.” If Seulgi was next to Joohyun, she would have earned a round smack on her leg for that comment. As it is, all Joohyun does in respond was to turn slightly pink. “It’s pretty cute. Where did you get them from? Can you get up, turn around, let me see them?”

“Sure.” She slants her laptop to face away from the bed and hops onto the floor. “I bought you a matching set, by the way. When are you coming back again?”

“In two days. Why? Do you miss me?”

“Seulgi.”

Seulgi laughs. “I miss you too. Tokyo isn’t quite the same without you darling. It’s too bright. Too much smoke. Is the dust situation bad in Seoul right now?”

“Yeah. It kind of is.” Joohyun clambers back onto the bed, adjusting her laptop on her legs such that it faces her again. She clicks through the tabs on her computer. “Ooh, Yeri sent us an email...”

Thirty seconds and a group call later:

“Wait, you guys are planning a bachelorette’s party? For… us?” Seulgi can’t sound any more surprised if she tried.

“Yeah! Isn’t it exciting? Congrats on finally getting engaged, by the way!”

“I…” Seulgi swallows, her brows scrunching for a moment. Then she beams. “Thanks.”

Joohyun giggles. “Thank you. So we just have to be there on Friday?”

“Yeah! Wear something nice! None of that ‘scrubby flannel nonsense’ as Sooyoung’s told me to remind you guys about.”

Joohyun gives an easy shrug. “Okay.”

––––––––––––

“They will hate this!” Seungwan cries out, her hands wringing. “I don’t even know why I agreed in the first place!”

Taeyeon nods, sympathetic. “Well, what’s done is done. I mean, if things don’t go that well, at least Yeri’s really enjoyed herself all throughout this entire process.”

“You, on the other hand, look really stressed out,” Yoona observes. “If you don’t mind me saying, that is.”

“How can I not be?” Seungwan bites her lips, nervously. One of her brow is angled in a way that signals how utterly perplexed she is. “We didn’t even ask them whether they wanted a party thrown for them! And then they’ve probably just gotten their rings and might not even want to get to the vows stuff yet! Oh my god, are we going to ruin their entire engagement?”

Taeyeon laughs. “There, there. I’m sure it can’t be that bad.”

“It can be that bad.”

––––––––––––

Seulgi adjusts the long sleeves of her body-hugging black dress. Her hair is carefully curled and pulled into a low ponytail. Her eyes shimmer when the light hits them.

Joohyun thinks it is unfair that Seulgi gets to look this good all the time. Although she knows very well that Seulgi thinks the same about her. She watches as Seulgi paints her lips a deep shade of red.

“Are we ever going to tell them?” Seulgi inquires, popping her lips to let her lipstick spread more evenly.

“Tell them what?” Joohyun asks, innocently.

Seulgi gives her a look. Then she laughs. “I guess we’ll have it your way.”

“I mean, you could tell them.”

“Nah. Your way is better. Most of the time.”

“Most?”

“There was the time you told me that the salt shaker was the sugar one!”

Joohyun’s brow rises. “I told you that the one on the left was the sugar one. And it would’ve been, if you hadn’t switched them and forgot about it.”

“Okay, you get that one. But what about the other time you told me to take a left on the first turn instead of the second and we wound up in the middle of some random suburb where all the stupid little houses look the same?”

“You still remember that?” Joohyun’s lips curl upwards. “Are you keeping tabs on all my mistakes, Kang Seulgi?”

“Maybe. I mean. You don’t make many and I want to remember everything about you.”

She laughs again. “I love you, do you know that?”

“I love you too. You really look great, Joohyun-ie.”

“Stop saying such things!”

“Why not?”

“Because I wouldn’t go for this little party that Yeri’s thrown for us if continue like this! Seriously. But are you really up for it? You look kind of tired. Were the Japanese investors really that bad?”

Seulgi waves her concern off as she gets to her feet. “I just missed you, that’s all. At any rate, we should probably get going. Sooyoung’s going to kill us if we’re late.”

––––––––––––

Somewhere in the back of the building, Tiffany’s fingers are clutched around her iPhone and her brows are hitched so high that they’ve nearly disappeared beneath the fringe of her recently bobbed hair. There is nothing but incredulity in her voice as the woman demands, “You’re hosting a bachelorette’s party with both of them in attendance? What are you guys all playing at?”

“Fany–”

“Don’t you dare, Kim Taeyeon! This has got to be one of the most poorly planned things I’ve ever encountered in my life, and God, I’ve seen too many piles of hitting the damn fan in my life, you hear? How did I not hear about this before today?”

“Well. Yeri took a week to plan this,” Hyoyeon tries to point out. “You have to give her a chance?”

––––––––––––

At the very least, Yeri’s managed to get a ton of alcohol for the event. Seungwan privately wonders how much underage drinking Yeri’s done, but it won’t do her own sanity any good if she spends too much time dwelling on the question. After all, it’s not as if she’d be able to assert any claim over Yeri’s upbringing. That would be Joohyun’s job. Or Seulgi’s, for that matter.

She bites down on her lips nervously as she watches Yeri and Sooyoung pull the couple apart with gusto. Watches as Seulgi gives Joohyun a slight pout before she lets herself be frisked away by Kim Yeri. And bites her lips more when a small frown appears on Joohyun’s face. Seungwan’s heard Tiffany’s complaint from Taeyeon, who realized that maybe they weren’t really thinking all that clearly when they were planning this entire… gala.

But it’s too late to back out now.

At the very least, none of them hired any strippers. A pity, Sooyoung and Yeri had scoffed. But a little logic never hurt anyone here: Taeyeon was a little worried that Yeri would find herself on the wrong end of Joohyun’s temper. Certainly, none of them wanted any heads to roll.

So instead, they settled for light entertainment. Some pole-dancers.

But no stripping.

There would be no involved tonight, Seungwan had managed to empathetically declare. There had been some dissent, but the majority, again, valued their lives more than the entertainment value that voting otherwise might bring.

Still, Yuri’s tiebreaking vote got the lighting all dim and purplish, much to Yeri’s delight. After all, Joohyun-unnie’s favourite colour is purple!

––––––––––––

“So let’s have some fun!” Yeri squeals as she pulls Seulgi to one section of the room, somewhere deliberately partitioned from the other side with dividers and an elaborate series of flowers and balloons. The decoration’s nothing short of being out-of-sync with each other, but time was at a premium after all.

Seulgi nods, beaming as she looks around to meet the laughing expressions of her friends. There’s a lot of loud music blaring from the speakers and honestly, she’s sworn not to go to clubs anymore, but… there are always exception. And it’s not as if Joohyun’s not here, probably trying to figure out where Yeri’s dragged her to. God. How much did they spend on booking this floor?

YooA’s excited voice pulls her out of her thoughts. “Now that you guys are finally here, we can get the party started!” She wobbles over to Seulgi, grabbing her arm to pull her towards the others. “We’ve cracked open a bottle for you – look the staff’s put such pretty lights into the bottle! Say ‘ah’, that’s it!”

“Aww, she spluttered! Kang Seulgi, that vodka didn’t come cheap!”

She fends them off, lightly, with a silly grin blooming on her face as she wipes some of the stray drops of vodka off her chin. “Sorry, sorry, but wow, I’m like, really surprised that all of you could make it today.”

Sunmi’s cherry red lips stretch into a wide grin, her white teeth flashing under the strobe lights. “How could we miss this? Seulgi, please!”

“So. Tell us. How’s Joohyun like in bed?”

“Yoona-unnie!” Yeri’s voice cannot hide her the shock. “What even—”

“I mean. Our Sooyoung-ie used to do that a lot,” Taeyeon points out as neutrally as she can, her lips set in the straightest line. “Guess someone has to compensate for her absence today.”

“It’s a fair question,” Sunmi points out.

“But… still!” YooA’s already large eyes are wide. “Yeri’s here!”

“So?”

“So I don’t need to hear about any lewd details between you and Joohyun-unnie! My god, please hold your mouth until I get out of here—”

––––––––––––

Joohyun finds herself clinging to Sooyoung’s arm, just slightly annoyed that the music’s much to loud for her comfort. Or at least, it’s truly much too loud without any ethanol in her system.

The first thing she does when Sooyoung lets her open her eyes is take a swig of the bottle of rum. Straight. It’s lukewarm and honestly sort of meh without any ice.

So the second thing she does is to take Yongsun’s proffered glass of, “it’s rum and coke, you idiot”, and glug the entire glass down within six seconds.

The third is to step towards the bar to order a Graveyard, because well, why not? The entire tab’s not falling on her anyway.

The fourth is to let herself be wrapped in a bone-crushing hug from Jennie, who’s “so glad that you and Seul are finally engaged!”

The fifth is to take the Graveyard and get Jisoo to take her glass too, and ensure that she, Bae Joohyun, beat Kim Jisoo at downing the entire thing in one breath. (She wins, of course.)

––––––––––––

One hour and twenty minutes later, the party is still in full swing. Seulgi’s lost somewhere in the gaggle of her semi-drunk friends, and her left temple sports some smudged lipstick. Not that Seulgi could tell whose lipstick it came from, not in this lighting.

is parched, and her tongue feels a bit like sandpaper from drinking all that alcohol and she needs to escape to the washroom. Where is it?

After some gesturing and loud questions yelled into ears, she finally gets someone to point her towards the general direction of the washroom. She nearly trips over her own feet four times as she traces her way down the stairs to the toilet downstairs. She grimaces at the sight of the red against her forehead, taking some tissue to swipe it off. Her own lipstick is coming slightly undone, but only slightly. The Bobbi Brown’s pretty smudge-proof.  Yay. She’ll have to go thank Sooyoung for that present then.

It’s when she makes her way out of the bathroom when she stumbles into someone. Someone who’s probably hs had too many martinis by this hour, for her gait’s worse than Seulgi’s. Which says quite a bit.

In apology, she offers Seulgi some of her martini, her smile wide and altogether very friendly.

Seulgi doesn’t remember getting her name, nor does she remember what exactly she tells this girl, but she begins to cry. The kind that’s full on tears, completely and utterly bawling her eyes out.

Caught off guard, Seulgi tries to awkward pat her arm. “You okay?”

“No! You’re… you’re… you’re too pretty to be married!”

“Thanks? Please stop crying—”

“No! Not until you become un-married!” Her tears do stop though.

Seulgi pulls back, shaking her head vehemently and pouting. “But that would mean un-marrying Joohyun! That’s nuts and totally not happening, okay?”

“Come on. You’re pretty. I’m pretty. You’re already pretty so your husband or wife or whatever can’t be that good looking because that would be totally against the laws of the universe for two people to congregate together like that.”

“Erm.”

“Are you saying that I’m not pretty?” There’s a tremor to her voice. Like she’s about to start bawling again.

“No, no, that’s not…” Seulgi sighs, defeatedly as she tries to make out the person’s face in the darkness. It doesn’t look like anyone she knows, so she figures that she’s probably one of the regular partygoers from the floor down here. “Look, we’re kind of blocking the way to the toilet and—” Seulgi jerks them out of the way of a projectile of vomit that was about to land and her feet. “Yeah. Blocking the way. Come on. Let’s go elsewhere?”

“Yes! Elsewhere!” The girl gleefully claps her hands as she stumbles after Seulgi.

“No, hey it’s really not what you’re thinking!”

For someone so small and drunk, the girl has a really strong grip. She all but drags Seulgi through the crowd. Seulgi guesses that she’s familiar with the bartender, for the guy’s eyes light up in recognition when he sees her, grinning easily as he pours the ice into his shaker and mixes a tray of kamikaze shots.

“I really shouldn’t—”

“Oh, c’mon. What harm can it do?”

She supposes it couldn’t hurt. Could it? She squints, somewhat uneasily, at the bartender and the drunk girl. She did see the drink being made in front of her after all. And she didn’t really want to hurt the girl’s feelings. So she takes a shot, for politeness’ sake. Or two.

She thanks them. Tries to extricate herself. Gosh. How does she get someone off her arm?

“There you are!” Seungwan’s voice cuts through the noise. It’s a wonder how Seulgi manages to hear her but Seungwan’s always been loud, to say the least. “I’ve been looking all over for you.”

“Seungwan-ie!” She cries out as she makes another attempt at freeing herself. “You’re here.” The relief that washes over here is laden in her voice. “Can I go yet?”

“What, no!” Then the girl stalks up to Seungwan, frowning deeply. “Are you her wife?”

Seungwan blinks. dropping open. “What, no? No, no, no, she’s not–” Then, at Seulgi’s frantic blinking, she quickly corrects herself. “Actually, as a matter of fact, I am. So get your hands off her.”

Drunk girl relents, her vice grip loosening and Seulgi feels a rush of blood run through her veins. “God. Whatever. Be happy in your married-ness, I guess. But if you ever change your mind…” A paper magically slips into the front of Seulgi’s dress and she jumps at the contact. “Call me.”

“Oh my god. Get away from her?” Seungwan repeats. She sounds moderately unconvincing in the role of Seulgi’s wife but would otherwise sound like a perfectly good friend. More jealousy would be good, Seulgi notes. “Come on, Seul. Let’s go.”

When they hit the first steps of the staircase, Seungwan demands, “What was that?”

“What’s what?”

“That, you idiot.”

“Someone wanted to hook up with me, clearly?” Seulgi tries. “But hey. I didn’t go with her. Obviously. Please don’t tell Joohyun anyway.”

“Speaking of Joohyun… you told the girl you were married already?”

“Erm. Hmm. Maybe.”

“Wait, so were you lying? Because you could very well have told her that you were still engaged or something…” Seungwan pulls Seulgi’s left hand up. “Wait a minute this ring’s different from the one you had two months ago! What the hell? Did you guys run off to get hitched without telling us?”

Seulgi nods, slowly. “Maybe?”

“God. Kang Seulgi! It’s not just a simple technicality, you got married without telling your friends!”

Seulgi winces. “Yeah. Well. Since we aren’t really doing an actual bachelorette party, why don’t you like… unwind a bit. Drink with me.”

“I really shouldn’t.”

“What Yeri doesn’t know won’t kill you.”

––––––––––––

Neither of them are sure how much alcohol has made its way into their systems, but Seulgi’s BAC is probably creeping too close to the point of mild alcohol poisoning to be safe. By this time, Moonbyul has located them and Seulgi’s back in the embrace of her friends, tucked into the leather couches. Sunmi giggles when she notices how Seulgi can barely recognise any of them by this point. She’s mostly content to let herself drape over the others, snuggling against the shiny sequins that Sunmi’s wearing.

(Sunmi’s not exactly sure if she’s going to make it out of this alive: yes, it’s entirely platonic but Bae Joohyun’s never been known to like sharing Kang Seulgi.)

“How much did she drink?”

“Er…” Seungwan tries to remember, but honestly, she’s lost count. “A lot?”

“She doesn’t usually drink this much,” Sunmi points out, slowly. “How did she let herself get this drunk?”

Moonbyul shrugs. “Also. I think that’s Joohyun I see coming over.”

Sunmi silently thanks Moonbyul for the warning. She values her neck to quite a substantial degree, after all. Seulgi groans a little as Sunmi hastily shifts the younger girl’s head onto her knee instead. Even from a small distance, Joohyun’s steps are obviously a little unsteady, but her bright smile cannot be matched by anyone around her as she spots Seulgi.

“Hello!” Joohyun calls cheerily. “Sooyoung says that we can go home. Seulgi-ya, come on, we’ll head home now.”

Seulgi doesn’t open her eyes, and just shakes her head vehemently. Then she groans because everything spins a bit too much when she does so. She mumbles something that none of them catch.

“Come again?”

“Won’t go home with nobody,” Seulgi mumbles again.

“Come on, Seulgi-ya. We should go. I want to go home.”  Sunmi’s still trying to free herself from Seulgi, but the others have swiftly shifted themselves away from the couch. Sunmi’s heart nearly stops when Seulgi tries holding onto her knee with Joohyun watching, but Joohyun doesn’t seem to care that much.

“But. No— Can’t. Didn’t I tell you already?”

“Tell me what?”

“Told youuu, I’m married, and I’m not un-marrying Joohyun-ie for anybody,” Seulgi slurs, clutching more tightly onto Sunmi’s knees. Sunmi’s eyes are grow comically wide. Whether it’s because she’s still terrified of Joohyun or whether it’s because of her surprise at Seulgi’s revelation, she’ll figure that out later.

Something in Joohyun flares for a second – who in the world tried to proposition Seulgi? She knows that Sunmi wouldn’t dare, so… But in any case, Seulgi’s fending off all advances. Even from her. It’s kind of cute, and she lets out a chuckle as she looks down at Seulgi.

Joohyun moves to crouch next to the couch, helping Sunmi free herself from Seulgi’s grip. “It’s me, Joohyun-ie.”

“Yeah, Seul, it’s really her. Open your eyes, kiddo,” Sunmi encourages with a slight prod of Seulgi’s shoulders, exhaling in relief as she’s finally extricated herself.

Seulgi groans a little as her head’s gently lowered onto the couch. She opens her eyes briefly and catches a glimpse at Joohyun before squeezing them shut. “Can’t really see you properly. Are you as pretty and smart as my Joohyun-ie?”

Is Joohyun really meant to reply with an affirmative? “Yeah, it’s really me.” Then she wrinkles her nose a little. “You really stink.” Then she turns to Sunmi, demanding, “How much did she drink?”

Sunmi shrugs. “A lot. I think she drank the most when she made Seungwan do shots with her though. Byul found her like this.”

Joohyun sighs. She’s not Sober Enough to deal with this. She tries again, “Seulgi-ah, let’s go. Come on.”

“But Joohyun-ie will be mad if I leave with someone else – and I never want to make her sad,” Seulgi whispers as she shakes her head again. Tears suddenly leak out from her eyes. “Making Joohyun-ie sad will make me sad.” Joohyun manages to push her up to a sitting position, though Seulgi’s eyes are still squeezed shut. Seulgi shakes her head once more. “Please. I don’t wanna make anyone sad.”

“Shh.. shh, it’s really me. Come on. Seulgi. Open your eyes.”

“You’re very pretty, I’m sure, but…” Seulgi frowns a bit before she pouts. Her hands crack her knuckles and Joohyun slaps at them to make her stop. “Maybe you really are her. But if you are really Joohyun, you would know the password.”

“The password?”

“Yeah!”

She hesitates. “I… love you?”

“I love Joohyun-ie too. But not that. And not my phone’s password either.”  

Joohyun considers this. “Okay. You do remember the time I messed up. The one time I messed up at doing the laundry. Like, it was what, a couple of years ago? Somehow, I managed to use two kinds of softeners instead of the detergent in one wash. And everything smelled great since the scents happened to mesh well, but you also realised how I messed up because the towels seemed like they were coated with too much of that weird softener layer. And for the record, I still blame you for this one because you were really being too damned distracting that day.”

“And what did you do after?” Seulgi’s bunched up left fist is trying to wipe at her eyes, clumsily, as she tries to squint at Joohyun to get a better look at her. Joohyun realises that Seulgi’s contact lenses either fell out or were removed at some point, for whatever reason.

“I banned you from all your leather jackets for a week. A pity, because you look stupidly good in them. But the laundry had to be done. You felt bad enough, somehow, even though we both knew it wasn’t objectively your fault. And then you tried doing the laundry the week after. But you didn’t the shirts before you washed them. And you also overdried everything.”

Seulgi’s eyes are finally open enough now. Although, with how she’s simply grinning and leaning into Joohyun’s shoulders, Joohyun can’t really tell.

“But come, let’s go home now.”

––––––––––––

It takes three hours and forty-seven minutes for someone to finally tell Yeri to call off whatever plans she had for an actual wedding. It takes Yeri another hour to send out a series of texts and emails to get all the plans she had in motion cancelled.

Yeri’s brows are stitched together.

She’s annoyed that Seungwan’s completely sloshed and that well, all her plans are for naught. But well. Joohyun and Seulgi are cute and she can’t really yell at them either. She’s probably going to KIV this, and bring it up in the future, remind them that neither of the two bothered to tell any of their friends that they were already married. Aha. Some guilt tripping is in order. Hopefully, one of them would feel bad enough to buy her a present. Or at least, treat her to lunch.

“Sooyoung!” She calls out as she scurries to her feet. “We need a new plan.”