The Fake Girlfriend

            I was screwed.  My parents were coming to visit me at school and the girl I’d been dating the last couple months had dumped me.  Again.  And I could handle the heartbreak just fine.  I wasn’t that hooked on her to begin with.  The trouble was, my parents kept threatening to bring in a matchmaker if I didn’t start showing some ability to keep a woman around for more than a few weeks.  They were worried that I was throwing my future away already on my photography degree, claiming that I would never find a decent job once I graduated.  They at least wanted me to provide grandchildren for them at some point in the future before they were too old to enjoy them.

            Personally, I wasn’t in any kind of hurry to settle down.  I planned to travel around the world and take pictures once I graduated.  But I needed them to remain pacified until then because they were flipping the bills for college.  I wanted them to think that I was seriously dating someone and contemplating starting a family after college so they wouldn’t start trying to plan a future for me.  And that is how I found myself venting my frustrations after class to my musically minded friends at the café down the street from campus. 

            “Just tell them to mind their own business,” was Heechul’s response.

            I glared at him from across the table.  “You are not helpful!  Some of us don’t have rich boyfriends that buy us anything we want.  When they’re done paying all my living expenses, I can tell them I’m not interested in dating anyone at the moment.  In the meantime, what do you suggest?”

            Ryeowook thought long and hard on this as he took a sip of his coffee.  “Do you have any female friends that you could convince to pretend to be your girlfriend while they’re in town?” he asked.

            I laughed at this. 

            So did Heechul and I threw my spoon at him.  He deftly ducked out of the way and it hit Henry instead as he walked up to the group.  “Hyung!”

            “Sorry, Henry.”

            He sat down beside me and set the spoon back down on the table.  “What did I miss?”

            “Yesung is angry because his girlfriend broke up with him—not a surprise—just as his parents are coming into town to visit.  They are going to flip out on him and hire a matchmaker if they find out he’s single again, which he’s against because he has no plans to get married, which is probably why every girl he dates keeps breaking it off with him.  Ryeowook suggested that he ask one of his female friends to pose as his girlfriends for the couple weeks they’re here, but he doesn’t have any.  He just has a bunch of angry ex-girlfriends and wannabe girlfriends,” Heechul informed Henry.

            “Thank you for so much for the delightful summary of my depressing love life.”

            “You’re welcome,” Heechul chimed, smiling bright as the door to the café opened and his own beloved boyfriend walked into the café and waved at the table before heading to the barista to order his drink.

            “How about you pay a woman to be your girlfriend for a couple weeks?” Henry suggested. 

            “That sounds like a e?” I pointed out.

            “If you got a e you could have as well,” Heechul pointed out.  “Without strings attached.  Isn’t that basically the kind of relationship you’re looking for anyway?”

            “No, thank you,” I said.  “Why are we even here?  I knew this was going to be a waste of time.”

            Siwon walked over to the table with his coffee and sat down beside his boyfriend, who wrapped his arms around Siwon’s neck and kissed his cheek, regardless of the fact we were sitting in a public place.  He caught his boyfriend up on the conversation the same way that he’d done Henry and Siwon thought over the situation as well.  Now, Siwon is not part of our music program—in fact, he’s a fashion model and met Heechul because he also models on the side—but he is a wonderful problem solver. 

            “It’s too bad that everyone has already seen Heechul dress as a woman because he could have just dressed in drag and pretended to be your date for a couple weeks.  No one is as convincing as he is!  He went to my family reunion as a woman and all my aunts adored him!  They insisted he come to brunch and the salon with him the next morning.  They called me up and informed me that they approve of my new girlfriend and expect invitations to the wedding,” Siwon explained.

            “Again, as you said, that would work if everyone on campus hadn’t already seen him in drag so much,” I pointed out.

            Heechul looked over at Ryeowook.  “But no one has seen Ryeowook in drag except a few of us and he’s just as convincing.”

            Ryeowook was just about to take another sip of coffee and froze with his cup in midair, looking around the table at us.  “Me?”

            “Is anyone else here named Ryeowook?” Heechul pointed out.

            “I forgot that you wore drag to that costume party!” I realized.  “All the guys on campus were hitting on you!  You were dressed as a cheerleader with that short skirt of yours!”

            “You never even told anyone who you were at the end of the night,” Henry said, laughing about it.  “Some of the guys in my class still talk about it and wonder which school you came from.”

            Ryeowook’s cheeks t