CHAPTER 11

Babysitting

 

 

“That Kim Yerim…” Park Soo-Young muttered. They had been wandering around for hours until they finally gave up on the chase and did nothing but loiter in the car while watching the sunset from the lakeside. “You think she would have been caught by Taeyeon Unnie by now?”

“If you think about it, it really is none of our business,” Wendy said while fumbling with her smartphone.

“You really think she’s Joohyun Unnie’s sister?”

“Who knows? I do remember that she moved in with Taeyeon’s family after Joohyun Unnie died. Maybe she changed her name too. It’s not impossible.” Down on her phone screen was a search list of news articles on deaths and murders in Yeonsan. She kept scrolling and scrolling, but it seemed she could not find the article she was looking for. Giving up on it, she put down her phone and looked out at the evening twilight.

Soo-Young’s fist lightly hit the steering wheel with a thud. “Do you think maybe Yeri would agree to look for the time capsule with us if she does remember us? She might want to know what Joohyun had hidden there with us back then.”

“What if she doesn't even want to remember,” Seulgi suddenly began as she stared at the changing colours of the evening sky. She had been so quiet the entire time that it almost startled the other two to hear her voice again. 

“You're saying that because you don't want to remember. You're not her. Not everyone is like you,” retaliated Soo-Young. Again, they were sparking another bickering battle.

“Sorry...” Seulgi muttered. “You know what? Maybe I need to take a break from all of this.” Pulling the latch, Seulgi opened the car door and went outside.

“Hey! Where are you going?” Soo-Young called out.

"Out for a walk." And with that, Seulgi slammed the car door and left.

"Oh, so you're running away again, huh?!" Soo-Young yelled some more, but Seulgi ignored her and kept walking.

 

Half an hour later the sun has left, just like how Seulgi just slammed the door at them—literally and figuratively. How many times does she have to do this? The image of Seulgi's back getting further and further away replayed like a glitching video file. That air of nonchalance... not a single drop of pity or consideration did she show... Did she ever care about any of us at all? Despite all the efforts of convincing herself that she has forgiven Seulgi’s betrayal years ago, Soo-Young still felt this anger burning deep within her, especially since she kept doing it again and again... Subtly trying to get away from them and blocking them off for some unknown reason.

Wendy had gone off to look for Seulgi but she hasn’t returned either. All alone, 24-year-old Soo-Young stared right ahead at the dark horizon from the driver’s seat. The darkness stared back at her. And for lack of better imagination, she almost swore she saw a smiling face somewhere in those shadows—like a mischievously grinning Cheshire Cat, like the face of a Gengar with malicious intentions. Of course, no one was there except her and her constant frown, but if the author of all misery enjoyed playing with her, he must be having so much fun right now. She wasn't having fun though. But it did not matter. She hasn't had fun in many years. She was used to it.

Through that time that she was alone, numerous thoughts passed through Soo-Young’s head. So many things to do… So many things to prove… None of those thoughts were pleasant, not even a few. When you invite a bit of darkness in, it was always more than what you bargained for.

 

What if… what if… what if…

What if…? Seulgi’s insecure voice echoed over and over in Soo-Young’s head.

…Or was it her own voice…?

Shut up.

Shut up. Shutupshutupshutup shut—

 

 

Thirteen Years Ago: November 2005

Midnight, the worst time of any day—if it was even considered part of the day. Every night the toddler’s cries get louder; every night it all got worse. 11-year-old Soo-Young took a pillow and pressed it hard on her face. Despite her brother crying almost every night, she never got used to the noises he made. She hated it. She hated it all. This messed up family, this messed up house…

That little boy in the next room cried even louder. He seemed to be begging—pleading—for anything or anyone to comfort him.

“Stupid kid,” Soo-Young muttered through the pillow. Can’t he just shut up and stop crying?

A second later and she could not take it any longer. Tossing her pillow and blanket away, she grumpily hopped down her bed and marched out to the next room. Before twisting the knob and opening the door she looked around the corridor. It was dark and quiet (other than the incessant cries coming from the room). The coast is clear.

Soo-Young opened the door and flicked on the light switch. The boy was sitting up within the crib.

“Shush…” Soo-Young approached the boy and lightly caressed his thin hair. “Do you know how much I’d get in trouble if I get caught here with you, huh?” she whispered to him as if he would understand. Oddly, he stopped crying. “Of course, you don’t know. You never get in trouble. Do me a favour and at least let me sleep. What do you want? Do you want milk?”

The toddler cooed at the sound of Soo-Young’s voice. He seemed to have understood the word “milk.” He was so innocent, so naïve… He only wanted milk and would be happy at just the mention of it. He was just like Seulgi with her junk food—a total baby. And he was a baby. He was just 2.

“Alright. I’ll go get it for you. But you have to be quiet, deal?”

Soo-Young quickly made her way down stairs and prepared a bottle of milk. When she got back to his room, she gave him the bottle. He held it and lay down while drinking.

As he watched him, she began talking to him in a soft voice. “You know, I liked it better when you weren’t around.” She knew he wouldn’t understand anything, but carried on a one-sided conversation anyway, because she knew the sound soothed him.

“Before you came, Dad still lived with us. I used to like Dad. He was much nicer to me than Mom was. But now because of you I barely even see him. He left because he hates Mom, you know that?” She paused. Her brother looked endearingly into her eyes as if waiting for her to continue. “Of course, you don’t know. You don’t know anything. But I do. I’m older than you. And smarter. And now I hate Dad too. And Mom. And you. Someday I’ll leave this place and I’ll never see you again, so I hope you enjoy this little time I’m sparing for you.”

Since the baby had calmed down, Soo-Young walked back to the door to leave. The moment she touched the door, the toddler started crying again. Soo-Young ran back to his crib. “Hey, I said shush!”

The toddler made some undecipherable sound. It was as if he was trying to say something, but he couldn’t enounce the words properly. It looked like he wanted her to stay.

“What do you want me to do now? I need to leave. She might catch me.” Every time she tried to leave her brother, he cried harder. He only seemed to stop when she stayed close to his crib. “I know you don’t like being alone, but I can’t stay here. I’m leaving, okay?”

Her brother cried so loud.

“Park Soo-Young!” That voice.

Soo-Young almost jumped in fear. Right by the door was her worst nightmare—the impending doom she was so afraid of. There was no escape now. Immediately, she went on her knees and rubbed her palms together.

“I-it wasn’t my fault! He kept crying on his own!”

“How dare you!” her mother yelled. “I told you not to bother him!”

The next thing she knew was a swift stinging slap by a cold, hard hand. Soo-Young held her burning cheek and ran back to her room, back to where she should have stayed in the first place.

 

***

 

The next morning, Seungwan finished her meal and went to her desk to start doing her homework. It was the weekend; there was nothing else to do. Seulgi called her on the landline saying she had contracted a bad case of the colds yesterday so she would probably be sick in bed right now, and Soo-Young had not called her to come out and play yet. Seungwan thought she might as well study and reread and revise, just like how her parents were always looking through legal documents.

As she flipped through her notes, she heard the voice of her mother calling out to her.

Immediately running out to the living room, Seungwan answered, “Yes?”

“Your friends are waiting for you outside. I suggested they come in, but they insisted that they talk to you first.”

Oh, it’s probably Soo-Young and Seulgi again. Though I thought Seulgi said she got sick with a cold from playing around in the forest? 

Upon looking out the gate, Seungwan's heart almost skipped a beat. To her surprise, she did not find Soo-Young or Seulgi there. Instead, she saw the teenage Joohyun with her kid sister Yeri, awkwardly standing in front of their gate.

“Unnie? What’s going on?” Seungwan put on her blue jacket and went out to meet them. The last time she saw them, Joohyun yelled at them with dark intimidating eyes, telling them to leave their hideout in the forest. What does she want now? The closer Seungwan's steps made for Joohyun the louder her heart pounded. 

“Seungwannie!” Yeri said excitedly and went to hug her. At the same time, the early-winter winds swooped down, causing Yeri to hold on to Seungwan tighter. Seungwan welcomed Yeri's hug, but was still apprehensive about the unnie with the dark pearly eyes watch over them.

“Can I ask you a favour?” Joohyun started as she held onto her worn-out coat. By the way Joohyun looked down onto Yeri with worry in her eyes, Seungwan's fear was taken over by a different emotion. Sympathy? Pity? Something seemed wrong.

“What is it, unnie?” Seungwan asked while lightly patting Yeri's shoulder.

Joohyun flinched in the cold. Her lips parted halfway, but it took longer to get her words out. She was hesitating. “Can... can you look after Yeri today?”

“Me?” Seungwan could not believe her ears. Wrapped around her hip was a small Yeri rejoicing and making excited squeals.

“You told her she could come over and play with you, right?” Joohyun's brow intimidatingly hiked upward.

“Y-yes, I did b-but…”

The scary unnie’s expression grew gentler, as if she was saddened by something. “But?”

I never thought you would allow her, Seungwan wanted to say, but held herself back. Staring at Joohyun face to face, it looked as though Joohyun might cry—or heaven knows what she might do—if Seungwan was to refuse. Instead, Seungwan told her, “Nothing.” Looking down at Yeri she then said, “Let’s play together today, Yeri!”

Upon seeing Yeri light up, Joohyun bit her lip.

"Don't worry, I'll take good care of her," Seungwan reassured her.

"Just be wary of the silly things she says," Joohyun warned Seungwan. "She's a kid with a... um... wild imagination." Joohyun then crouched down to meet Yeri’s eye level and said, “Yeri, I’m leaving you here with Seungwan Unnie, okay?”

Yeri head quickly turned to her older sister. Her hands let go of Seungwan. “You’re leaving? But we can play together with Seungwan Unnie!”

“I can’t play with you today. Play nicely with Seungwan Unnie, okay?” Joohyun stood up and prepared to leave.

“But Unnie…,” Yeri whined. She almost went after her sister, but Seungwan held her hand to stop her.

“I’ll be back later at around sunset,” Joohyun told them. Before turning to leave, Joohyun nodded at Seungwan and mouthed out a “thank you.” Then the two younger girls watched her walk down the road until she was gone.

 

***

 

2 o’clock. Soo-young’s thumb pressed on a button on the remote control repeatedly while watching the second hand tick at the clock above the television. The channels switched in time with the second hand’s ticking—one channel per second.

“Time passes too slowly,” she groaned. Every unpleasant weekend without Seulgi always seemed like torture. Stupid sick kid… As usual she was lonely, but not lonely enough to bother Seungwan today. Seeing Seungwan’s nerdy parents were also rather annoying. Just the whole idea of “parents” irked her.

With her free hand, she grabbed a small bottle from her pocket and briefly scrutinized the label. Cold Pressed Arnica Oil. 100% Pure and Natural. With another groan, she got up and trudged to the decorative mirror on stuck on the wall. Her gaze locked in on the slightly greyish bruise on the reflected image of her cheek. It was barely visible, unless looked at closely, but to her it throbbed and ached like a gigantic, obnoxious pimple.

Does this even work? Soo-Young thought as she rubbed the oil on her face. This could very well ruin my skin and that weirdo unnie from across the street could just be lying… and it smells like old lady perfume…

Suddenly, the bell rang.

She wasn’t really expecting anyone, so she continued looking at herself in the mirror, pretending that nobody was at home. It’s probably just the mailman.

Ding-dong! The bell rang again.

And again.

And again.

And agai—

Like an incessant annoying itch, Soo-Young could not take it anymore.

“What the hell do you wa—” When she opened the gate, she saw Seungwan… lifting a shorter kid up so that this kid could freely abuse the doorbell button. This smaller kid with the black mask… Wait, what?

“Hi Soo-Young, I know this is a little unexpected…,” Seungwan said as she set down the kid on the ground. The little girl then ran behind Seungwan’s to hide. “You don’t have to hide, Yeri. It’s okay.”

“Yeri? Isn’t that that creepy girl’s sister?” Soo-Young tried to make sense of this, but she was still very confused. “What are you doing with that kid?”

“I’m babysitting. We already had lunch together and played a bit in my house, but she’s getting bored and I don’t know what else to do. You have a lot of toys though and—”

“Hey, wait, wait! You’re not saying I let her play here in my house? The answer is no! I’m not letting this kid from that creepy house enter mine! For all we know, their family could be witches or something!”

“They’re not witches, Soo-Young. Look, if you don’t want to let her play in your house, you don’t have to. Maybe directions to a good playground or some place we could play together?”

“Why are you even babysitting that kid?! You saw her older sister transform into an angry monster in that forest! Who knows what this kid can do!”

“Just please, Soo-Young? I don’t want to bother my parents and ask them to drive us around. They’re busy in their case study right now.”

Seungwan looked into her sweet puppy dog eyes. Being a good friend involved doing favours, and Soo-Young was learning that more and more each day, but this? Doing a favour involving this tiny child of a phantom menace just did not sit right with her. Ugh, why does Seungwan Unnie have to be the one to ask? This was what it was like to have friends: having some sort of Kryptonite meant your armour of stubbornness ended up gaining bad cracks on the worst places...

“Fine.” Not wanting to say no to Seungwan, Soo-Young agreed to take them out for a little entertainment. (She was in no way letting that neighbour kid into her house. That kid’s weird unnie still gave her the creeps.)

Sensing Soo-Young’s distaste with her, Yeri hid behind Seungwan as they walked. She avoided making eye contact with Soo-Young—only sneaking small peeks when she knew the bully-like unnie wasn’t looking. Her intuition wasn’t wrong; Soo-Young was cussing in her head the entire time they were together. To her, this child was nothing but annoying. Whenever Yeri saw something, she would squeal and tug at Wendy’s coat, and yap on about how her “amazing” unnie did this… did that… The wind blows for a bit and Yeri would say, “My Joohyun Unnie doesn’t like the cold!” They see the store on the corner and Yeri would say, “My Joohyun Unnie buys me snacks here!” They ride the bus together and Yeri would say, “I ride with Joohyun Unnie every morning!”

“Yeah, we get it, you do stuff with your sister all the damn time,” Soo-Young muttered in her bus seat while Seungwan was blithely going along with the little girl’s stories.

“You must love being with your sister,” Seungwan said with a smile.

“I love my sister! And she loves me too! She says so every night.”

“Ugh, I can’t believe we’re babysitting today.” Soo-Young rolled her eyes. She only had one sibling and she hated him—or at least she liked to believe that she hated him. How anyone could love a sibling was a concept too foreign for her to understand.

When they got to the place downtown with all the shops, the three of them walked around and went window-shopping for toys and little trinkets. Then they went to the open market to buy some street food.

“Hey, there’s some fish-shaped buns (붕어빵) over there!” Seungwan pointed as they were walking along the colourful path filled with the savoury smell of Korean street food.

“Goldfish!” Yeri exclaimed. Those popular Korean buns were literally golden, and inside was a filling of sweet red bean or cream. They were usually sold during the colder months, and children particularly love them.

Seungwan bent down and said, “Do you want some, Yeri? Seungwannie Unnie will buy you some!”

Soo-Young obnoxiously cleared to make sure those two still remembered of her existence. “Um, buy me some too.”

And so Seungwan bought enough for the three of them to snack on.

“Here Yeri! Be careful; it’s hot,” Seungwan wrapped the bottom half of the fish bun with tissue and gave it to Yeri, who had gratefully accepted it with glee. Warm street food on a cold day is always a treat.

When Yeri pulled down her mask to eat, Seungwan and Soo-Young finally got to see her face for the first time.

She looks exactly like a smaller version of her sister, Soo-Young thought as she watched the kid bite on the warm fish-shaped bun. But, what’s…

“What’s this?” Seungwan bent down and lightly touched Yeri’s cheek with her thumb, tracing the outline of what seemed to be a discoloured patch of skin. At first, Seungwan thought it was just a dried-up slash of dirt, but it wasn’t coming off. “Birthmark?”

 Yeri pushed Seungwan’s hand away. Soo-Young looked at her closer.

This… isn’t a birthmark.

Soo-Young looked away from Yeri’s face and stepped back, while her hand unconsciously gravitated to the barely-noticeable, yet still-throbbing bruise on her own cheek. Suddenly, every slap, every beating, every single punishment caused by her every little rebellion started coming back to her.

 “Park Soo-Young!”

“It wasn’t my fault…”

…

Soo-Young’s harsh expression towards Yeri softened. Then she lightly poked the kid’s cheek. “Does it hurt?”

“Uh-uh.” Yeri shook her head.

So, it doesn’t hurt. “I think it’s a scar,” Soo-Young said to Seungwan.

“A scar?” Seungwan looked closer and gently poked Yeri’s cheek again. “Did you hurt yourself back then, Yeri?”

Yeri ignored Seungwan’s question and continued eating her food.

 Suddenly, Soo-Young remembered that odd conversation with Joohyun a few months ago:

 “Try raising your legs up and pressing ice on your bruises. It will help ease the pain.”

“…if you go to the pharmacy, ask for arnica oil. It makes your bruises and scars heal faster.”

…

What does that weird Joohyun Unnie know?

…

Soo-Young grew quiet. After eating, they continued looking around, but Soo-Young only silently trailed from behind. She just could not stop thinking about that scar. And to think that Yeri and her sister also lived in that dark creepy house, and that they also have this weird hideout deep in the woods… There was just something so off about them. Maybe they were not witches, but they certainly act that way…

“Gosh, it’s pretty cold today. Yeri, are you cold?” Soo-Young heard Seungwan say. “Maybe we should go home.”

“No, I want to keep walking!” Yeri said. She was pretty stubborn, even in this cold weather.

“There’s a small pharmacy over there,” Soo-Young spoke up. “We can buy hot packs.”

“I don’t think I have enough pocket money for the three of us though,” said Seungwan.

“Fine. I’ll buy.”

This time it was Soo-Young’s treat. This is all part of being a good friend, she thought. When she got the hot packs, she gave an unsealed one to Seungwan. Then she tore the wrapper of another one, shook the hot pack to make sure it heats up, and handed it to Yeri.

“Well, whaddya know? Soo-Young Unnie isn’t so bad, right?” Seungwan said to Yeri.

Soo-Young turned red. “Shut up.”

“Say thank you,” Seungwan whispered to Yeri and playfully wiggled her eyebrows up and down.

“Thank you,” Yeri said shyly while clutching her hot pack.

At that moment, Yeri seemed… so cute. Maybe Soo-Young’s heart melted a bit. Just a bit. Maybe not enough for anyone to notice… but she did appreciate that forced thank you for some reason.

 

On the bus ride home, Seungwan continued talking with little Yeri, while Soo-Young silently listened.

“Did you have fun today? Although it was quite cold outside…”

“I’m happy today!” said Yeri.

“Well, that’s a relief. You don’t think Wannie Unnie is boring?”

“I love Wannie Unnie.” Yeri leaned her head on Seungwan’s chest and extended her short arms to give her a hug.

“Aww, did you hear that, Soo-Young? Isn’t she adorable?”

Soo-Young just rolled her eyes.

“Joohyun Unnie says that if I’m happy she’s happy too. And mom is happy too,” Yeri said.

Soo-Young’s eyebrows jerked up. It was one of those words she hated hearing. “Mom? You have a mother?” Soo-Young suddenly asked Yeri.

Seungwan glared at her. “Of course she does, Soo-Young. People aren’t born through cranes.”

“Where are your parents? I’ve never seen them at all,” Soo-Young asked as though she was questioning a law offender.

“Soo-Young, don’t start.” Seungwan put her arm around Yeri, trying to protect her.

“Come on, Yeri, you’re a smart girl. Where’s your mom?” Soo-Young continued her interrogation.

Yeri looked at her with the most innocent eyes, as if she truly believed every word that came out of her own lips. “Joohyun unnie says mom is somewhere far away in a beautiful, happy place. I don’t know what she looks like, but I think she’s smiling today.”

Seungwan and Soo-Young glanced at each other.

The heck does that mean? Both Soo-Young and Seungwan had some terrible ideas, but were too afraid to say it out loud.

Just to confirm, Soo-Young asked Yeri, “Where’s that faraway place?”

“Far away. Past the lake and past the mountains and clouds, unnie says.”  Joohyun warned Seungwan about Yeri saying "silly things," but...

Before Seungwan could shush her again, Soo-Young continued asking more questions. Satisfying her curiosity might kill her, but she was dying of curiousness to hold herself back anyway. “What about your dad?”

Yeri just stared at her and did not answer.

“Why is your ugly house always dark?” Soo-Young went on.

“Soo-Young!” Seungwan hissed. “Maybe that’s enough questions.”

“The lights are broken,” Yeri innocently answered.

“Broken?” Even Seungwan thought that answer was strange.

“Your house’s lights have been broken all this time?” Soo-Young asked some more.

“Yes.”

“Why don’t you get them fixed then?” Seungwan asked this time, starting to look even more concerned.

“I don’t know,” Yeri simply answered.

“Okay…” Since she was on a roll already, Soo-Young thought she might as well keep going. “What about that house in the middle of the woods? Why do you even go there?”

“Unnie likes to study there. She has lots of books there! She also likes to write and draw and play with me there. It’s not dark on sunny days in the forest.”

“So, your unnie prefers to go there because your house is dark?” At this point, even Seungwan could not help but ask questions too.

Yeri nodded. “I miss Joohyun Unnie. I’ll tell her all we did today! Next time we should all play together! With Joohyun Unnie!”

The two older girls stopped asking questions. Something was definitely off. Are Yeri’s parents both dead? Did their mother leave them like her Dad left for Japan? Were they abandoned like those poor puppies at the shelter? What exactly happened to them? Plenty more questions ran through Soo-Young’s head, and she was sure Seungwan was thinking the same thing. Oh, she was so curious… but what was the point in asking? If her guesses were true, she knew she would most likely feel sympathy for them, and she did not want to.

 

When they arrived home at the same old street where they all lived, they saw that Joohyun was already there. It was almost sunset and the temperature dropped faster, yet she was still waiting outside for Yeri as the wind tossed and twisted her hair.

“Unnie!” The little girl ran toward her older sister and gave her a big hug.

Upon seeing the big smile on Yeri’s face, Joohyun smiled too. She lightly patted Yeri’s head and then affectionately cupped her sister’s face with her porcelain-like hands.

“Ack!” Yeri squealed. “Your hands are cold!”

“Oh, sorry,” Joohyun then removed her hands from Yeri’s cheeks.

“Welp… it’s so c-cold… I’m leaving.” With another gust of wind on that blustery evening, Soo-Young crossed her arms and turned to head toward her house. Besides, she did not really want to witness those two sisters ogling over each other. Also, with that information she just pulled out of Yeri earlier, she didn’t think could face them without going overly judgmental again.

“Wait! Soo-Young Unnie!” Yeri suddenly ran toward her and hugged her long legs. Soo-Young did not expect that at all, so she just stood there awkwardly. “Bye, bye,” said that squeaky little voice. Then Yeri let go.

That… What was that? Soo-Young thought before entering the gate. A little kid has never done anything like that to her. Usually little kids run away from her… Now she was too flustered to even react.

“Bye, Soo-Young,” Seungwan said before Soo-Young closed the gate without even looking back at her.

“Thanks for looking after my sister,” Joohyun said to Seungwan sheepishly. “I hope she wasn’t too much trouble.”

“I had so much fun!” Yeri raved again.

“Oh no! She wasn’t!” Seungwan waved her hands. “I had fun with her too.

“Also please say thank you to your friend Soo-Young for me.”

“Oh, yeah sure,” Seungwan said.

Behind the gate, Soo-Young heard it all.

Joohyun. That weirdo girl from across the street… thanked her.

 

 

October 2018

 

What if Seulgi Unnie was right...

What if the time capsule can no longer be found?

What if Yeri doesn't want to see us?

What if I'm just wasting my time?

What if our friendship is over... for good? 

What if we'll NEVER be okay?

Soo-Young had a choir of dissonant voices in her head that bothered her constantly. However, when the voices blur into one deafening voice, it never sounded like Seulgi's petulant voice. It sounded more like her own.

---

 

Author's Note:

Yeah I know I haven't updated in ages, coz well, I didn't feel like writing for the past idk months. But now, because of the damned coronavirus, I have nothing better to do at home and I got bored of playing Pokemon (Y and OmegaRuby) and Minecraft all day, so I got back to writing and planning this again.
Anyway, I hope you guys are safe. Don't panic. Keep calm and wash your hands.
Stream Psycho for good health and idk... because I officially put it in my Little House playlist and it fits this story? Idk. I'll try to update this story whenever I can.

Meanwhile, you can help me battle corona boredom by providing me some entertainment through commenting...something...anything. lol I want to read something too..... I can't be the only one writing here. I'll read them and reply. I swear I don't bite. :P