Those whispered promises, the nights we stayed up, I hope you remember them. 

"Let's start the choreography again from here." I stood up and went to position. "Chanwoo, you have to extend your arms more. It'll look better."

We've been preparing for our upcoming comeback for weeks now. The song was made a long time ago, but we had to wait for the company's go signal to record. Donghyuk was in charge of choreography and everyone's satisfied. It looks good and it fits the song well, we just have to practice it a lot more since the moves are a bit fast and mv filming is not long from now. 

"Everyone get in position. I'm going to film it." I said and positioned the camera. "Let's finish it in one take so we can rest, okay? "

"We all know we're going to hear 'again' about 100 times before we can rest. " Jinhwan joked.

I raised an eyebrow "I'm sure that I won't be one of the hundred reasons though." I heard everyone chuckle. 

"Okay. Let's just start and get over the 100, I'm really really hungry. " Bobby said, putting down his water bottle. "I WANT PIZZA!" 

"Pizza? Hanbin's going to treat us pizza right? " Yunhyeong asked. "I seriously don't want to cook, I'm beat. "

"Alright. Whatever. Just stop talking we don't have much time, do you want to eat at dawn? " I said frustratingly. 

"Don't get angry! Don't get angry! " June said in between laughs. 

"He won't. Tigerbin never comes out these days. " Donghyuk said. "It's a relief. " he laughed. I eyed him. 

"It's almost like he's too kind now right? I'm getting a bit nervous." Chanwoo said. "Please spare me. "

I sighed and rolled my eyes. "Let's just start before I really get angry. " 

There is no point in getting angry, really. And I'm not in the mood. Besides the physical exhaustion, I've felt tired from everything that shows up in my mind. If there is such thing as being tired of thinking, then I am tired of thinking. It just takes over me sometimes, and it's frustrating, because there is a lot of things I need to do and we've been really busy for this comeback. I can't afford to be worrying about something else on top of what's already at hand. 

"I'm going to stay here a bit more. " I said when we finally finished practice. That is after more than a hundred agains "Go back to the dorm without me. "

"Are you not going to shower?" Donghyuk asked. 

"Says someone who sleeps without even showering." Chanwoo teased. 

"It's because you asshats take too long."

"I'm going to take a shower here, I'll probably stay here until tomorrow too. " I said. "I don't know yet. It depends. "

"You practically live here. " Jinhwan said. "You're missing out on the fun. "

"You mean missing out on the noise? " I chuckled. "There's just still stuffs needed to be done. "

"Just be sure your taking a rest" Yunhyeong said. I just nodded. 

"Okay. We'll be going then. " June said. "I might sleep on your room!"

My ears twitched. "Give it a try and I'll kick your . " 

I went to my studio after they got out and looked for a change of clothes somewhere in the drawers. I don't have any issues with working after practice, even if that means I have to wear sweaty clothes under air condition, but someone changed my habits, because she said its not good for my health and she swore that I don't smell bad, but told me it doesn't hurt to have a good hygiene. Now I always make it a point to have spare clothing here just in case. I guess when you grow comfortable with someone, you don't notice that they become part of your everyday. 

I picked up my clothes and went to the restroom in the same floor where my studio is and took a quick shower. I honestly don't have anymore work to do but I don't feel like myself today and I don't want to act okay in front of the other members. Though, I'm sure that they noticed, I'm glad that they just let me be and I'm glad that they don't ask. Because I'm fine. I guess I just need time to not think, to negotiate with the thoughts in my head or to get used to it at least. I smiled bitterly, I might just be able to write songs in this state.

I went out the bathroom as I dry my hair with a towel, not minding if anyone would see me. At this hour, only the cool guys still work, by that I mean, Raesong, Jaewon and me. And by cool I mean, having nothing else to take up your time but work. I don't mind, because making music doesn't mean work to me just yet. I booted up the pc immediately when I reached the studio, leaning back on my chair like I always do. Maybe music is part of me, maybe this is what makes me. I always think that I have to say what's on my mind no matter if it's right or wrong, good or bad, that's why I have always enjoyed writing. It gives me the courage I could never have from anything else and at the same time be the weakest I could be. What I write is all that I am without the walls. Funnily enough since I met her, I started writing more everyday. I find writing about her the easiest. I made a lot of songs for her, about her, because of her. Some released, some, only I would know about. Those songs were our story, only if you look in my perspective. Because I would know the meaning behind those words, the memory that inspired it, the reality it holds. Maybe these songs were my everyday and the day that follows. 

"Hey, Hanbin! " I hear someone shout from outside the door. "How many times do I have to knock? "

My eyes avert back to the screen of my pc and noticed that I haven't even typed in my password yet.

I heard him knock again. "Is he sleeping?"

"Wait up. " I said and glided my chair towards the door and unlocked it. 

"Yo. What took you so long? " It's June

"Right. I'm a bit upset." and Jinhwan. "But here we are" he said, putting down plastic bags from the mart, taking out cans of beer and convenience store foods "Brother. We have to talk. "

I ran my hand over my face. I don't like where this is going. "I'm not drinking. "

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