June xx 2020
It’s been already one and a half year since IZ*ONE made their Korean debut. Gaining popularity over time and considered as one of the best-selling artists of all times. None of it can get better for the girls. 

Not for Sakura though.

Sakura never knew she’ll like someone in her life as deep for Chaeyeon. Sure, she had several crushes when she was young - artist, classmate, or even sunbaes. Yet, the feelings Chaeyeon give to her is different. Sakura feels out of her mind whenever she’s with Chaeyeon, similar to a drug. Sakura just finds Chaeyeon addicting, the small touches Chaeyeon gives to her. She craves for it. Even the slightest attention Chaeyeon gives to her, she loves it. Enjoy nothing more hearing her laugh, the joy in her voice, it warms Sakura somewhere deep within. Or how she feels secured around the dancer’s presence itself.

But she’s here in Japan in a shared room with Chaeyeon and her head is laying Chaeyeon’s lap as they watch a romantic movie ‘Love Letter’ which Sakura is sure of that both of them have already watched it before. Sakura can’t help to have herself fixated at Chaeyeon, rather than the movie that Chaeyeon is focused on. Sakura’s knowingly she wants to touch Chaeyeon’s face, maybe caress it, same as how Chaeyeon is brushing her fingers through her hair gently right now. 

Sakura is afraid. Even they're on the stage of ‘friendship’ to go as far as that, she can't help but feel scared on the younger’s reaction. She is known not to be the clingy type after all. Well, exclude Chaeyeon on that list. Sakura might’ve stuck around Chaeyeon whenever they have free time or even on a broadcast. But she’s contented with this. Just staying by Chaeyeon side and their normal routines. Sakura won’t let their friendship go in vain because of this mere feeling or even the member’s future.

Greed is bad.

Sakura knows that inside her. 

She is unsatisfied with their relationship rather want something more than friendship with Chaeyeon.

An unpleasant feeling Chaeyeon arises as she sees Sakura with Hyewon. Hugging to be exact and they’re live on V live! Chaeyeon approaches Eunbi and sits beside her with a playful smile then side hugs the leader. Eunbi oblivious on the tension between the two, she rests her head on Chaeyeon’s shoulder. 

Also, Eunbi might be feeling some uncomfortable stares directing at her.

It wasn’t uncommon for the two to do that. Chaeyeon knows that. But there’s an inner instinct that she wants to remove Sakura away from Hyewon. Far, far away. And Chaeyeon also knows she can’t do that silly thing. Shipping is common in their idol career. You could say its necessary. Chaeyeon is also aware that HyeKura is a famous ship. Scratch that Sakura has a harem already. Not only in her group but also in Japan.

Chaeyeon lets her feelings sink inside and continues smiling throughout the V live without a hint of concern about Sakura and Hyewon. Except.

It bothers her a lot.

“She’s only a friend.” Chaeyeon keeps on muttering to herself those words, maybe since ever, Sakura cried on her shoulders when Sashihara Rino announced her graduation from HKT48. Chaeyeon could even remember the date - December 15, 2018.

Chaeyeon vividly remembers that day. The day her heart wrenched in pain so much from every tear the Japanese girl shed. It wasn’t a new sight for her, she’s always been Sakura’s counselor however that time she could feel the despair of the girl. Sashihara Rino, after all, is their team’s theatre manager and mother of HKT48.

All of IZ*ONE members are all asleep except for Chaeyeon who is anxiously waiting for Nako and Sakura. She keeps herself updated through the internet since the remaining members are in Korea and the two Japanese are in Japan. However, as she scrolls down the forbidden lane – the comment section. Her hands curl up unconsciously as she reads the ‘concerns’ their fans are giving.

[+58, -6] Why do the Korean members have to suffer; ㅡㅡ; just send them back to Japan, the group is fine with the Korean members alone!!

[+18, -1] Are they joking with the fans? It's IZ*ONE or AKB, pick one and be clear about it. I don't want the Korean members to be affected by their decisions. Do we even need the Japanese members?

Chaeyeon throws her phone on the side of her bed – not harshly. She heaves a heavy sigh as she stares on her phone. Sometimes K-netizens could really get crazy over things. They wouldn’t even understand how much these Japanese girls worked hard for this and labeling them as ‘thrashes’. Chaeyeon knows this situation very well, K-netizens bashing other people as if they are better. 

‘Ugly’

‘Untalented’

‘Unattractive’

Those were just some of the words thrown at her when she first started off. And it's mostly full of the beauty standards of Korea which she doesn’t pass. It broke her. It wasn’t her fault in the first place for being born with an ‘unpretty’ face. Her face wasn’t small similar to the size of a fist nor she has a nose with a thin bridge. Yet amidst of that she never cursed that part of her. Chaeyeon is grateful for her parents with her whole life and blaming them isn’t on her mind even once. Chaeyeon is proud of herself, maybe her confidence gets lower since she considers herself as puffy which Wonyoung tries to debunk every single time and Chaeyeon is grateful for the giant maknae for those words.

Chaeyeon already dealt with these stuff countless of times, she just hopes Sakura and Nako wouldn’t be affected through this. Hearing the dorm’s door opening up Chaeyeon jolts from her bed and runs quickly through the door. Saku-chan and Nako-chan?

Running up to the door with light footsteps hoping not to disturb the member's sleep. Chaeyeon with a body of a feather successfully did her job on arriving in front of the door without waking up any members. Her face drops to a worried expression as she sees both of the Japanese members with a gloomy looking face. Swollen eyes are visible from their eyes most likely from crying earlier. Nako dismisses herself after she greets Chaeyeon a ‘good morning’ and heads to her respective room.

Its already morning, how much time did I spend in reading on the comment section?

Sakura who is standing still from the door. Chaeyeon turns around to find herself on the Japanese girls embrace that silently weeps on her. Lightly the girl’s hair which Chaeyeon usually does to the girl that unpredictably calms down the older one.

“Jja-jjayeon, Rino-chan is now go-gone. What will I do after these two years?” Sakura said in between her cries that can’t help a painful sting struck to the taller girl as she carries the petite girl to the couch. The sight before her eyes is a vulnerable Sakura, she might have seen this side of the girl but never this in despair. If only there’s a way for her to ease the pain of Sakura, Chaeyeon would take it. Only that she knows only time would heal the girl. Fate might really put Sakura in IZ*ONE since if ever she’s still promoting in HKT48, the girl might’ve remembered every memory she has with Sashihara as they promote.

“Please don’t leave me,”

“Saku-chan, I’m here. I’m on your side” Chaeyeon gently utter to the girl as she lifts up her face to see the older girl’s orbs. 

“I might not know Sashihara-san very well though I’m sure she doesn’t want her kohai (junior) in this condition, right?” Sakura nods as she grasps on Chaeyeon’s words that brought a smile to the older’s face. A beaming one to be exact.

Chaeyeon guided Sakura’s head to her shoulders as she knew very well that Sakura is tired – exhausted. The long-haired girl kept still as she turns her head to take a glance at the peacefully sleeping girl. Chaeyeon chuckles as Sakura is known to be a fast sleeper in their group and lives up to its name.

Thump

A weird warmth feeling is felt by Chaeyeon. Exactly the feeling she felt back then in MAMA on Japan. Much different though, it grew.

“Just remember whatever happens I’m always on your side,” Chaeyeon mutters softly before her eyesight darken as she goes into a deep sleep alongside with Sakura.

“Chaeyeon unnie. Unnie!”

“Wha-what?” Chaeyeon screams in confusion as she heard Yujin’s voice so suddenly.

“Come on unnie stop spacing out, we need to head back to the dorms unnie and tonight you’ll be making tonkatsu!” Yujin excitedly said as she jumps up and down from where she stands. Chaeyeon could even see a wagging tail behind Yujin. 

“You go first to the car Yujin, I’ll catch up” Yujin nods frantically as she skips her way outside of the practice room. That girl is too energetic even for the past year, Chaeyeon internally chuckles as she goes back in getting her bag.

As she walks in front where her bag is and grabs it, she stops as her eye’s darts on a familiar keychain beside her bag. Sakura’s keychain.

If her memory serves right that is Sakura’s keychain that has always been dangling on the older’s bag. Taking the keychain, it's her first time seeing this small keychain up close. A blushing bear blowing cherry blossom petals. Chaeyeon gently smiles as there is a distinguishable copy of this keychain. Isn’t this ---. Her thoughts are interrupted by a loud Yena calling out her name.

Chaeyeon slips down the keychain to her pockets later giving it to the owner and dashes out of the practice room.

Sakura grits her teeth in annoyance as she sees a rather lovey-dovey father and mother figure of the group cooking for tonight’s midnight snack party. Chaeyeon and Eunbi’s laugh echoes into Sakura’s ears as Chaeyeon probably made a joke.

Eunbi unnie…

The small girl hugs the already suffocating pillow tighter as the view from the living room to the kitchen is disturbing her. Her actions gain attention from a smirking Yena that head keeps on turning left and right from Sakura and the two members that are preparing their food. Sakura sensing an odd stare sees the person who frequently plays with her smirking. Sakura shakes off her head to the younger girl that smirk only grew. Feeling in defeat she defensively points out to Yuri who is laughing her off with Yujin’s corny joke. Yena looks at the direction where Sakura points and blushes as her unnie uses her weakness. Now that Yena thinks of it, Yuri should be beside her. Yena forgetting about her initial plan in teasing Sakura stands up and hugs Yuri from behind.

Another round of laughter rings inside Sakura’s ears however louder than earlier. Sakura’s might’ve had enough of the two and stomps her way stopping both of them in laughing and averts their attention to Sakura. As she is at loss for words with the two members questioning gaze, Sakura blurted out any excuse in her head.

“I want to help in cooking.”

Chaeyeon tilts her head in confusion and heartily accepts Sakura as she moves to the side giving her enough space to cook. Eunbi sighs though Sakura could’ve sworn she heard Eunbi squealed rather than a sigh. Chaeyeon fast to her hands quickly ties the apron string around on Sakura’s waist that flusters the older girl with the sudden action.

It wasn’t a bad choice after all.

Peeking over the living room Sakura could swear that all of the member's faces have a ‘knowing’ look visible on their faces and quickly go back to their business as Chaeyeon calls out Sakura on helping with the tteokbokki.

“The string cheese is mine!” Yujin shouts as she claims the newly heated cheese that is actually Yena’s but grabs it first when the microwave timer turned into zero.

“Ya! Yujin-ah I microwaved that for me!” Yena said as she tries to reach for the cheese which is above her reach since the tall girl height towers her own. Yujin sticks out her tongue in a playful manner as Yena still couldn’t reach out for the cheese even she is jumping. It went on for three minutes straight until a very angry-looking leader stands in front of them.

“You guys are disturbing the lovely cooking couple here! Besides I bought that cheese in the first place!” Eunbi unperturbedly said as her eyes are twitching obviously calming herself from vexing out to the two ‘fake maknaes.’

Yena and Yujin glance through each other’s eyes with one message in mind. We’re doomed.

“We’re sorry Eunbi unnie” both of them apologetically said at the exact same to the leader and run their way around to the living room while hiding to the smallest member. Nako who is perplexed by the sudden situation with the two girls using her as a shield which effectively works as Eunbi softens and signals Chaeyeon and Sakura to continue their work.

“Eunbi unnie should really hide her cheese” Chaeyeon laughs as she turns her head around to focus on the last one remaining dish for the night. Sakura chuckles totally agreeing with the latter as Eunbi always loses her cheese whenever she wakes up in the morning just to see the emptied snack thrown on the trash bin.

“Saku-chan?” Chaeyeon softly calls out the girl which caught the attention of the girl and turn her head around after turning off the stove.

“I actually want to give you something later,” Chaeyeon said as she grabs the tray that is overflowing with only half of their food for tonight’s feast. Sakura hums but inside of her she is anticipating so much.

Carrying two trays that are full of food everyone’s faces lit up with the sight of food. Putting down the trays to the table Chaeyeon and Sakura settle down to the left side of the couch.

“Oh, I forgot something!” Eunbi said as she enters her room making everyone curious about the sudden action of the leader.

Eunbi arrives with six bottles of soju in hand causing for everyone to panic.

“Eunbi unnie we can’t be doing that and we have minors,” Yena disconcertingly said and everyone nods in agreement.

“Guys we should enjoy just one in a while and it was really hard for me to hide these from our managers if you all forgot tomorrow is our day-off so no worries” Eunbi confidently puts down the bottles of soju to the table. Sakura actually wants to drink tonight so that she could forget her problems regarding a certain girl.

“All right,” Chaeyeon approves and grabs a glass for each one. Nobody continues in protesting rather likes the idea. 

Four hours have passed and all the people in the room got drunk one by one. Hyewon just continues on eating the food remaining from the plates. While Yena who is crying in a corner decides on cupping the passed-out main vocalist Jo Yuri and mummering some incoherent words probably letting out all of her suppressed thoughts to the girl. The worst side is Yujin, Wonyoung, and Minju. 

Yujin is still clinging so much on to Minju who is barely awake while Wonyoung sober enough is still trying for the past thirty minutes removing the still energetic Yujin away from Minju.

“Minju unnnnniee notice meeee,” Yujin uses her killer (literally) aegyo on Minju and it went on as earlier.

Nako, Hitomi, Eunbi, and Chaewon are still continuing playing truth or dare that all of them were playing earlier but the eight dropped since mostly Yujin and Yena did the most embarrassing dares. The four are obviously drunk from drinking since the requirement on not doing a dare nor a truth is to drink one glass of soju. Eunbi perhaps hid more soju bottles on her cabinet.

“Gather up! Gather up!” Eunbi slurs as she shouts and hugs Nako who is beside her.

“I’m washing my hair, wait unnie” Chaewon said as she pours down half of glass of water to her hair and passes out with mouth wide open.

“Five more minutes unnie” Hitomi weakly said before she steals Nako away from Eunbi and conversated in Japanese.

“We’re going to be late, gather up!” Eunbi stands up as if she really is doing their morning call and walks up to the couch just find herself sleeping on it. Chaeyeon chuckles at the sight of her members.

Chaeyeon the last one remaining member who can actually think straight is taking care of the drunkest member right now which is Sakura. Sakura feels too intoxicated to the point she can’t remember where she is right now.

“I feel really light and good, really good!” Sakura mutters before opening her eyes slowly.

“You're drunk Saku-chan,” Chaeyeon chuckles on the older girl that’s face is so red from drinking.

Oh, I bet this is another dream. Me and Chaeyeon.

“What are young doing in my dream Jja-jjaeyeon?” 

“I’m here to help you Saku-chan. I’ll get some water for you,” Chaeyeon went along with Sakura’s dream as she stands up to fetch her unnie a glass of water, she felt a soft tug from the older girl trying to stop her from walking any further.

“Saku-chan?” Chaeyeon questions the older girl whose face is about to cry.

“Don’t go, please. Its been a while since I get to dream of you and now you're trying to leave me.” Sakura desperately pleads to Chaeyeon and felt a thump in her heart as the thought of Sakura dreaming of her. 

“Yameru! Yamete! (Stop! Stop!)” Sakura pulls Chaeyeon’s t-shirt tighter than earlier.

“But unnie I really think you need water right now” Chaeyeon timidly said as she goes back sitting beside on Sakura and the older girl unexpectedly grabs her arms to squeeze herself in. Chaeyeon face turns into a bright red. This must be because of the alcohol.

“Do you hate me Chaeyeon?” Sakura faces Chaeyeon. Too close for Chaeyeon as if one more inch she could swear they have kissed by now.

“That’s not the problem unnie” Chaeyeon tries her best in removing herself from Sakura. The petite body