AUTHOR'S NOTE: So I know I said this was coming tomorrow but I'm not here/won't be around so I figured a day early is no issue, right? ;)   

Warning, this chapter is:

1.) Very very long

2.) Bat insane

 

Anyway, enjoy! And let me know how you're feeling in general about SCV at the moment? Still enjoying? Still reading? Fave characters? Moments? Etc. More bonuses coming sometime soon, since y'all asked for them and I very much enjoy writing them 💕

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The Speed Demon

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Part III

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She ran her hand along the hood of the Camaro and to the doorhandles and back again. Already she'd developed a sort of strange liking for it - perhaps it was the fact it had unwittingly helped her win her first race, or saved her from certain embarrassment, or something about the car itself. She thought maybe it was the sound of that V8. That could turn even the hardest-nosed eco-friendly terrorist into a petrolhead. Lisa was still across the room talking to someone and drinking and laughing. Everybody was laughing. Even Seulgi wanted to laugh. When she turned around again Irene was stood there rubbing at her arm and trying to balance herself properly.

'Babe,' she mumbled. 'I'm really sorry.'

'It's okay. Did you give them the keys?'

'Uh huh. I'm really sorry.'

'It's okay.'

'What's Hongki going to say?'

'I'll just say I lost it.'

'You lost it.'

Seulgi shrugged. 'I'll say I forgot where I parked it and some kid stole it or something. It's fine.'

'I shouldn't have-' she hiccupped. 'I shouldn't have drunk. I'm sorry.'

'It's okay. I knew you would.'

'Yeah. Well. Babe.'

'What?'

'Can we go and talk to that girl again? What was her name? Jade? Jane?'

'Uh...Lisa.'

'Ah. Yeah. Duh.'

'Where the did you get Jade?'

'From the name bag.'

'The what?'

Irene giggled. 'You want some Peach Schnapps, babe? Before I finish it.'

'No, I'm good. And sober. And I want to stay that way.'

'Not even a little sippy sip?'

'No.'

'God, you look so good in that suit. I love you so much.'

'You’re drunk, stop it,' Seulgi said. Irene leant forward and wrapped her arms around the back of Seulgi's neck and gave her a sloppy kiss and smiled that smile of much mischief and many insober thoughts. 'You look amazing,' she murmured. 'Amazing.'

'We've got a job to be doing.'

'Can't it wait fifteen minutes? I'm sure we can find-' hiccupping again. Then: 'I'm sure we find a spare room or something.'

'In a warehouse?'

'That's probably the best place to find spare rooms, honestly. Babe. C'mon.'

'No. We've got a job to be doing. Or we did, until we lost our car.'

'We.'

Seulgi shrugged shyly. Irene stepped back and finished the last of the Peach Schnapps and tossed the bottle absently away and looked around. 'That her?' she said, nodding to absolutely nobody and expecting no proper answer.

'She's over there.'

They went over, Irene following close behind so that she didn't simply evaporate into the crowd and be lost to the allure of partying for the rest of the evening. As no doubt she would be. When Lisa saw them coming she excused herself from some girl she was talking to and smiled and nodded at Seulgi.

'You're still here.'

'We wanted to talk to you,' Seulgi said.

'We love you,' said Irene. 'I mean...never mind. I'm ed.'

Lisa took one look at her and laughed and drank. 'What do you want to talk about?' she said. 'Nothing important, I hope. I'm not really in the mood.'

'Just about this,' Seulgi said.

'Racing?'

'Racing. We're new.'

'I guessed. Still, you're really ing good for a new driver.'

'Just naturally talented, I guess.'

'You can say that again. What did you want to talk about, then?'

'How long have you be doing this?'

'What? Racing?'

Seulgi nodded.

'Most of my life, I guess. Ever since my dad let me drive his old beat-up Mercedes around the block and back. So, yeah. But it's different here. Korea's a different place. Different rules.'

'Korea?'

'That's where we are. You drunk as well or something?'

'You're not from here.'

'That's right.'

'You're a foreigner.'

'You couldn't tell before? From the name and everything.'

'I had a couple guesses. Thai?'

'You got a problem with that?'

'Oh, believe me,' Irene said, 'she doesn't discriminate. She shot a couple Mexicans last week.'

'What?'

'Not because they were Mexican or anything. But...y'know. She still shot them.'

'What is she talking about?'

'Ignore her,' Seulgi said. 'They weren't real Mexicans. Just costume ones.'

'Uh...Right. Is that what you wanted to tell me? About you shooting Mexicans?'

'She's quite trigger happy,' Irene said. 'Hey, you got any more Peach Schnapps?'

'I don't know. You'd have to ask around.'

'What about party sausages?'

'Same answer.'

'Alright. Babe, I'll be right back.'

'No,' Seulgi said. She put a hand on the fabric of Irene's shirt and pulled her closer, close enough that when she stumbled and almost fell Seulgi could smell the perfume on the flush of .

'You're staying right here. I don't want you wandering off.'

'I'm not a-' hiccup. 'A child.'

'Still.'

Lisa laughed at them again. 'I hope she's not planning on racing anyone tonight.'

'She's not a racer. She's just my, uh, tagalong.'

'Your muse.'

'Something like that, I guess. My moral support.'

There was no response. Lisa just eyed them curiously. In the dim neonlight Seulgi couldn't make out the expression on her face at all. Then she said, 'You seem pretty cool.'

'Cool.'

‘You know what I meant. You fancy racing again?'

'Uh...'

'If you find yourself a car, I mean. Sorry about that.'

'It's okay. It wasn't my intention to lose it tonight.'

'Nice car, too. How'd you find out about us, by the way? I'm guessing you didn't just turn up on the street and clock that we were racers.'

Seulgi paused a moment. She looked at Irene for reassurance but Irene had her eyes closed and was humming something to herself like a child in her own little world. 'I was introduced through an old friend,' she said.

'Who?'

'Changmin.'

Lisa nodded. 'He's a good kid. Same car as you, too. Same Chevy and everything.'

'Uh, yeah. Different plates, though.'

'Well, yeah.'

'Different cars. Just, you know...same model. Not the same car, though. Absolutely not. That would be stupid. Would be...uh, yeah. Stupid.'

'Right,' Lisa said. She drank. 'Well. If you guys find this to your liking, there's plenty more. Next one is a big one, too. More than just these guys here. It's a place in Ichon. Near the river.'

'Where?'

'You want to come along?'

'We'll think about it.'

'Cheongpa road. You can't miss it.'

'When?'

'Three days from now. Real big thing. I'll be there.'

'What about police?' Seulgi said.

'Police never come around for us. Well, they do, but they don't give a . Think about it, really. We're harmless in the grand scheme of things. We only drive at night. We don't do any like selling drugs.'

'What about weapons?' Irene said.

'What?'

'Weapons. Like, grenade launchers and . Or machineguns. Bang bang!'

'No.'

'What about tanks?'

'What?'

'I dunno. I just said it. You don't sell illegal weapons?'

'No,' Lisa said. 'We don't.'

'Well. Cool, then.'

She turned back to Seulgi and before Seulgi could apologise she said, 'It'd be good to see you there, if you've got a ride. It's always good to see new blood.'

'We'll be there.'

'Yeah?'

'Yeah,' Seulgi said.

'Alright then. I look forward to it.' She smiled at them again. 'I've got to go. I'll catch you some other time, Seulgi. And you, Irene. Nice to meet you.'

'Yes sir captain!' Irene said, taking off her Soviet hat and saluting. When Lisa was gone Seulgi shot her a look as if to say: Please. Irene shrugged. They went on out and around the corner and stood up the cold like creatures of the night, not really knowing what to do. Irene silent for a change. After a while Seulgi called for a cab and they hitched a ride back to her apartment and paid the driver and went on up.

She folded her suitjacket over the back of one of the kitchen chairs and took off her shoes and when she turned around Irene was leaning against the counter with a frown on her face that was almost too adorable.

'Are you mad?' she said. 'Baby.'

'No. I'm not mad.'

'You are.'

'I'm not.'

'You are.'

Seulgi smiled a tired smile.

'You're mad at me and you should be. I-' two hiccups. 'I ed up, babe. Again.'

'It's fine. We all make mistakes.'

'I'll make it up to you. Properly this time.'

'We just need to find out a way to get to that party in Ichon.'

'We don't have a car anymore.'

'I know.'

Irene was quiet. She seemed almost sober, which was surprising. 'We could ask Hongki for another one,' she said. 'Or Wheein.'

'Not a chance.'

'We could rent one.'

'Rent what?'

'Dunno. A Lamborghini?'

'How much money do you think I make?'

'You said you were frugal.'

'I'm not Pablo ing Escobar. I've got limits.'

'Well. I didn't know that. But I do now. So, no rental.'

'No rental.'

'What, then?'

Seulgi rubbed her head. 'I don't know,' she said. ', I don't know.'

'She seemed nice, though.'

'Lisa?'

'Uh huh.'

'There's something about her I don't like.'

'Is it because her hair is nicer than yours?'

'What? No.'

Irene giggled. 'Just saying.'

'I think I was right.'

'No surprises there, then.'

'I'm serious,' Seulgi said. 'She's the one. Did you see her face when you mentioned weapons?'

'I shouldn't have done that.'

'Yeah, but you did. And I'm kind of glad you did actually. Did you see the way her expression dropped? She knows something. I'm sure of it.'

'I don't think so.'

'What?'

'I don't think so,' Irene said.

'You said her name was Jade.'

'So? What's that got to do with anything?'

'You weren't even sober enough to remember her name. No offence.'

'I just didn't get that vibe from her.'

'Oh, the crimelord vibe?'

Irene shrugged.

'Trust me,' Seulgi said. 'I know these things.'

'Wanna bet?'

'What?'

'Wanna bet.'

'Bet what?'

'That she's not in on it. Or she's not the top boss.'

Seulgi laughed.

'No, I'm serious, babe. Wanna bet?'

'Well I'd bet the car but you already did that. So.'

'Alright. How about this: If she's in on it all, and I'm wrong, I'll buy you a nice new three-piece suit. And the shoes, too! But if I'm right, and she's just some random girl who happens to have very nice hair and an amazing hourglass figure and a really, really beautiful face-'

'Irene.'

'Right. If I'm right, you have to do something for me.'

'Go on.'

'You have to love me forever and ever.'

'You're drunk,' Seulgi said.

Irene laughed again. 'Okay. How about, you have to take me on a romantic riverboat cruise. Actually, wait. No. I'm not sure if I trust you on riverboats anymore. Or cruises of any kind. Or near water.'

'Me? You don't trust me near water?'

'Uh huh.'

'Are you forgetting the time you...you know...died?'

Irene was quiet a moment. 'I actually did forget that,' she said. 'Huh. Crazy.'

'It was last week.'

'Time flies. Anyway. You have to..., I dunno. Do something nice for me.'

'Whatever.'

'Deal?'

'Deal,' Seulgi said with a sigh. 'Now, can you go and clean up or something? You stink of whiskey.'

'That's the good thing about Peach Schnapps, you see? It's odourless. Doesn't smell even a bit. Now that's next-level right there. If only I'd had three more bottles of it. Oh well. Hey, I haven't had any cocktail sausages in forever. Crazy . And you know what? I'm not even in the mood for them. Maybe dying changed my tastebuds permanently. Maybe I'll never like party sausages again. Huh. Now isn't that scary thought.'

 

♣   ♣   ♣

 

She closed the door in a hurry and disappeared into the livingroom before Irene even had chance to say: Hey, babe! Wait! I made toast. When she came back through in a rush she had her jacket only half on and a phone in one hand frantically thumbing something in and she only looked at Irene for a moment, there behind the counter with a plate of unbuttered toast in front of her.

'You okay?' Irene said.

'I've been trying all ing morning to get someone who'd be able to lend us a car. Old colleagues, associates. Friends of friends.

'So... friends of Wheein.'

'Whatever. I've tried everything. You ing name it.'

'And?'

'Nothing. Not a thing. Zip.'

'Zilch?'

'Sure. Whatever.'

'Babe, it's fine.'

'It's not fine though, is it? We've got, what?' She looked at her watch and cursed. 'Eight hours until this ing race starts and we've got no car or anything. So, what? We just let this one go? We go back to the office and I tell Hongki I've failed to do absolutely everything? Maybe I should just tell him I shot him while I'm there. It'd put me out of my misery.'

'You need to calm down.'

'I am calm!'

Irene buttered a piece of the toast and bit and chewed. 'Y'know,' she said, 'I've got a theory.'

Seulgi sat at the table and turned to her with an expression that motioned her to continue only through the absolute understanding of knowing that it was impossible to make Irene shut up so why even try?

'I've been thinking about this a lot lately,' Irene said, 'and I think I've finally figured it out. I think there's this big worldwide ploy between toaster companies and electricity providers to squeeze more money out of people on their electricity bills.'

She chewed another corner off the slice of toast. Seulgi just looked at her blankly.

'No, listen for a moment. I'm serious! I mean, just think about it logically. How come every single ing toaster you ever buy can't fit a piece of bread in it? It's so stupid! It's like, you fit three quarters of it in but then the rest only half-toasts. Or doesn't even bother at all. And then you're left with soggy toast that tastes awful. Doesn't matter what way in you put, y'know? It's always the same. So in the end you've got two options, right? Cut the crusts off the bread - and who the wants to do that? - or...or.'

'Or?'

'Or put the bread in twice! Pop it in, let it toast, then turn it upside down and do it again for half as long. Just to have a slice of toast that's properly edible. And I'm thinking this has got to be some conspiracy by Big Energy to get us to use more electricity. I mean, it's so sneaky that nobody would ever question it. At first I was thinking maybe the bread manufacturers were in collusion too, but I'm not so sure. Bread's a basic item, right? The bakers are just doing their part for the world. Toasters, though, are technically a luxury. So I don't think so. I think it's just a sort of silent agreement between the toaster companies and the corporate suits at the electricity boards to make toasters that don't ing fit bread in them. God, that's stupid. And then I'm guessing the toaster companies get a little cut of the extra profit the electricity companies make as a result of literally everybody on the planet earth having to toast their bread twice. ing capitalist pigdogs. Know what I'm saying?'

Seulgi just looked at her.

'Anyway. Continue.'

'I... I mean. I don't really know how to respond to that, honestly.'

'How about: Wow, you're so smart, Irene! How could I ever hope to be as smart and amazing as you are?'

'I'll pass.'

'Spoilsport. So. About tonight.'

'Don't remind me.'

'No, wait. I've got an idea.'

'Forget it.'

'Just hear me out, babe. Please. Trust me on this one.'

Seulgi looked at her and sighed. As if to say: Give me all you've got. I'm sure it can't get much worse. But she just stood there eating her toast in silence.

'Well?'

'Never mind,' Irene said.

'What?'

'I wanna surprise you.'

'What?'

'Okay, so: You go along tonight, and I'll surprise you.'

'I don't have a car.'

'Just trust me on this one.'

'Trust you to get us a car?'

'I know a lot of people in this city. A lot of important people.'

'Like Yeri?'

'Sure. So, please, babe. Just for once - trust me. Please?'

'Whatever,' Seulgi said. 'It's not like we've got any better ideas.'

'Sweet.'

'So you're going to bring it tonight? A car, I mean.'

'That's exactly what I'm going to do.'

'And if you don't?'

'God, you've really got no faith left in me, do ya? Listen, Seulgs.'

'Don't call me that.'

'I'll get you that car. Trust me.'

'Fine,' Seulgi said. 'I trust you.'

 

♣   ♣   ♣

 

She was out the door by three in the afternoon and by the time Seulgi stepped out of the cab on the corner on Cheongpa road in Ichon at ten minutes past nine she'd still not heard a word from Irene nor had she answered any of the twenty-two missed calls Seulgi had left her. Seulgi stood a moment taking everything in. The cab disappeared up the avenue. The dim murmur of music ever so familiar. On the corner overlooking the riverfront was a big storage yard warehouse with a glass ceiling that looked better fit for the countryside and already she could make out a thousand tiny lights of every imaginable shade making shapes out of the night sky like bat signals.

She thought about calling another cab and going home. But she had a job to be doing and she had no idea where Irene was, either. So after a moment she crossed and made for the front of the warehouse with no car or anything apart from whatever dignity she still had left, now rapidly dwindling. Thinking to herself: Don Johnson never ing walked.

The two gorillas on duty looked her over and told her she had to off and she told them to go and speak to Lisa. When one of them came back a couple minutes later they let her through without a word.

Inside was the same as the place they'd been in Itaewon only somehow even larger and darker and smelling even worse. Cars lining both sides of the showroom without plinths. Lamborghinis with neon underside jobs and old Porsches with gaudy teenage bodykits and Junho's orange Supra and the Camaro she'd used to smoke that same Toyota only three days ago. People pushing past without even looking at her. She took one more look around and couldn't help but think: Man, Irene would ing love this.

She found Lisa standing by the far corner of the room opposite one of the DJ's booths, drinking and paying attention to nobody. She smiled at Seulgi and Seulgi smiled back.

'Found yourself a car?' she said.

No, Seulgi wanted to say. But instead she said: 'Yeah.'

'Where is it?'

'Uh, my girlfriend's bringing it. She's just running a bit late.'

'Your girlfriend. The one you were with. Irene?'

'Yeah. That's her.'

'She on her way?'

'Yeah,' Seulgi said, not knowing if she was indeed on her way. Lisa offered her a drink and she took it and tipped it back with a grimace. It tasted like paintstripper. She surveyed the room again. Near the entrance on the right was an old black minivan with the windows tinted to five percent and black wheelrims and Junho standing near it with his boys.

'He's got eyes for you,' Lisa said. 'I don't know if he wants to fight you or you.'

'What?'

'Junho. Or maybe he just wants to race you again.'

'He'd lose.'

Lisa laughed. 'Loving the confidence. Hey, listen - I'll catch you in a bit, yeah? I've got some stuff to take care of.' She looked at her watch. 'Meet me out front in half an hour. If your girlfriend's got your ride, I mean.'

'What for?'

'There's a big race going down. Nine of these bad boys so far. Ten if you're in.'

'What does the winner get?'

'The chance at the main event.'

'Which is what?'

'The last race of the night.'

'Are you going to be racing?'

'Me and Junho.'

'In the main event?'

Lisa nodded. 'Anyway, I'll see soon.'

'Uh huh.'

Before Seulgi could anything more she was gone, lost among the bodies. Seulgi just stood there. She stole a glance at Junho and turned away. Half an hour later she'd heard nothing at all from Irene and people were already filing out into the empty street like patrons at a festival, laughing and dancing and sharing drinks. Seulgi stayed at the back. In the cold air it was hard to think of much at all. Lisa was stood on the left side of the sidewalk and they made a big divide by the warehouse doors to let the other cars spill out onto the road in a sort of makeshift grid. Three of them were American Dodges. One was a green Lamborghini, two were Ferraris. The rest were Nissans and Honda NSXs and one a Subaru with gold wheelrims and black headlamps. The sound was tremendous. Lisa caught eye of her again and called her over.

'You ready?' she said.

'Ready for what?'

'To race. You should get in your car.'

'Uh-' she made to tell Lisa everything but the noise had grown into a sort of general laughter at something and they both turned to see what the commotion was. Immediately Seulgi wished she had not.

It was Irene, behind the wheel of an enormous white Ford Transit van, wobbling about as it came around the corner of the avenue and parked up at the back of the grid as if in some peculiar way it belonged there.

'Uh...'

'That's Irene, isn't it?'

'Yeah,' Seulgi said in resignation. 'Yeah, it is.'

'That's your ing car? A delivery van?'

'It's all we could get.'

'You'd be better off jogging. You sure you want to do this?'

Seulgi looked at her again. 'I've got no choice,' she said, not knowing how right she was. She excused herself through the laughing crowd and climbed into the cab of the van without even a word to anyone. They were all laughing. The girl in the croptop stepped out into the road and they waited. When Seulgi was sure they couldn't be heard she turned to Irene in the passenger's seat and said, 'What the actual is this?'

'It's your ride. Told you I'd come through.'

'It's a ing van, Irene.'

'It's all I could get.'

'Jesus.' She looked around the interior. There was a big button by the gearstick in an enclosed glass case that said WARNING NUCLEAR WASTE DISPOSAL on it and a couple other buttons on the dashboard by the speaker that she dared not ask about.

'Where the did you get a-' pausing, turning to the back of the van and seeing it had no room for storage at all: 'Wendy?'

'Hey, man,' Wendy said. She was sat on a little stool just behind the cab with a joint in her hand, smiling lazily at them through her glasses. 'Good lookin' out.'

'What the are you doing here?'

'It's my van, man.'

'Yours?'

'Hell yeah. Groovy.'

'Totally groovy,' Irene said.

'Jesus Christ,' said Seulgi. 'I don't believe this.'

'Hey, relax. It's cool. If anything, you should be thankful.'

'For what?'

'For Wendy lending you this. It's not often she comes out of her house.'

'She's right,' Wendy said. 'Too much at stake, you know? But this, man. Too cool to throw away this opportunity. Too radical, if you dig.'

'I dig.'

Seulgi looked at the back of the van. There were crates and boxes piled on both sides that she thought did not belong in a van at all. Things Wendy had put there. Things better left unmentioned. She pointed to the glass case behind the gearstick.

'What is this?' she said.

'Oh, that? That's just a little optional extra, you dig? Yeah, man. I thought you might need it for something like this.'

'Why does it say Nuclear Waste Disposal?'

'I couldn't find any appropriate stickers so I just put that on it. Sounds cool though, right, man? Totally Cold War-era . Tells you to stay away.'

'Is this a van?' Seulgi said.

'What?'

'Is this a van.'

'Of course it's a van.'

'What have you done to it?'

'A couple things,' Wendy said, taking a toke of the joint.

'Have you messed with the engine?'

'Messed? It's a whole new beast under that hood, man! A totally new system.'

'What sort of system?'

'V12.'

Seulgi laughed dryly. 'A V12 engine.'

'Yeah, man.'

'In a ing van.'

'Groovy, right?'

'Alright,' Seulgi said, more to herself than anything. The girl at the front of the grid winked at somebody and the other drivers were warming their engines and the noise was electric. Lisa watched them curiously from the sidewalk. So too did Junho, stood by the tinted minivan.

'Hey,' Irene said, pointing to him. 'Maybe he's gonna race in a van, too.'

Seulgi ignored her. 'How much power does this thing have?' she said. 'Three hundred horsepower? Three-fifty?'

'Uh, a little bit more.'

'Three seventy-five at maximum.'

Irene gestured in the direction of Wendy, still sat there, still smoking.

'Wendy.'

'Yo.'

'How much power does this thing have?'

'Twelve hundred BHP.'

Seulgi just laughed.

'What?'

'How much,' Seulgi asked. 'Seriously.'

'Twelve hundred, man. Your hearing going or something?'

'Are you out of your ing mind?'

'What?'

'You put a thousand-horsepower engine in a Transit van?'

'Thousand two-hundred, man. Whoo! Hey, heads up. Looks like you're racing, bro.'

She had no time to say anything else. The girl in the road dropped the ONE and all nine cars kicked off the grid and then Seulgi hammered the accelerator and immediately wished she had not. The entire van seemed to shake violently and the engine made the worst noise she had ever heard and within three seconds they were doing sixty-five miles an hour.

'Holy ,' Irene said. 'Why did I not think of doing this?'

Seulgi ignored her. They rounded two corners and a third. She had no idea where they were going and that was a serious problem because the van was faster than everything. By the end of the next straight the two Ferraris and the Nissans were in the dust and the only cars ahead of her were the Lamborghini and one of the Dodges that had started at the front. She shifted into third at a hundred miles an hour and the van lurched like some metal beast and the tires sounded as if they were already burning.

'How fast does this go?' Seulgi said, shouting to be heard.

'Dunno,' Wendy said. 'Never tested it.'

'Are you ing kidding?'

She tailed the Lamborghini in front as close as possible without crashing. The streets appeared as if they were not there at all. Buildings vanishing as soon as they were seen.

'They're gaining,' Irene said. 'How are they gaining?'

'Because I'm not putting my foot down.'

'What? Why not?'

'Because I don't want to ing die. Jesus Christ, what is this thing?'

'Well, do something! They're gonna overtake us.'

'Nuh uh,' Wendy said. 'Here. Take this.' She passed the smoking joint to Irene while Seulgi took each corner far too fast and wobbled the loose steeringwheel about like a lunatic.

'What are you doing?' Seulgi said. Wendy was busy sorting through one of the packingcrates. She held up a paintcan filled with oil and lugged it to the back of the van and with one hand pushed open one of doors. It went swinging madly on its hinges. All Irene could do was laugh.

'Wendy, what the are you doing?'

She didn't reply. She popped the lid away from the can and emptied as much of the oil as she could on the road behind them like something from a videogame. The first car to drive through it was the Dodge Challenger with the yellow hood and almost instantly it slowed and went skittering across the pavement and into the front of a shop on the sidewalk.

'Jesus wept,' Seulgi said. They were right behind the Lamborghini and gaining so fast she had to purposely slow to know where she was going next.

'Yo,' Irene said, laughing. 'That is ing extreme.'

'Wendy. Wendy!'

'What?'

'What are these buttons? On the dashboard.'

'Oh, don't press any of them yet, man. Nah, you don't need em.'

'What about this one?'

'Which one?'

'The Nuclear Waste Disposal.'

'Oh, that's nitrous.'

'What?'

'Yeah, man. Groovy.'

Seulgi checked the road. They were easing around the last corner. The warehouse along the Cheongpa riverfront was about three quarters of a mile up ahead and they could make out the jade face of the Han River gleaming at them in the thin eye of the moon through the window. The Lamborghini seemed suddenly to gain an extra gear or two.

'Floor it,' Irene said.

'I am flooring it!'

'Why's it not going any faster then?'

'I don't know!'

Irene leant over and pushed back the glass lid on the button.

'Don't press-'

She pressed it. They heard a momentary click of something and a hiss that sounded awfully like a gas leak and then the world became a blur and the ground seemed to peel away and everything in the observable universe slowed to a crawl. The van was doing almost two hundred within seconds. Wendy clung to the side of one of the crates she'd tied down and Irene made a little cross sign to God in the air and by the time they passed the finish line the Lamborghini was only just making it back onto the straight in their rear-view mirror. As if it had literally not moved at all. Slowly the van came to a halt. Far too slowly. When they stopped and Seulgi turned it back in the road the last of the racers were only just finishing.

'Oh my God,' Irene said. 'I'm so sorry.'

'Wendy.'

'Yo, man.'

'What the is wrong with you?'

'Me?'

'This is a deathtrap.'

'Hey, man. You won, didn't you?'

'That's beside the point.'

'Seems like the point to me,' Irene said. 'You can say it now, by the way.'

'Say what?'

'Thank you, Irene, for helping you win the race.'

Seulgi didn't reply. She parked the van by the side of the road and stepped out with Irene after her and made her way over to where Lisa was laughing and applauding.

'I'm not going to lie,' she said, 'I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't that.'

'Yeah. Well.'

'Congrats on the win.'

'Thanks.'

'You ready for the big one?'

'Uh, yeah. Guess we'll have to be.'

'Did you see that ?' Irene said. 'We were like ing...uh. , I had something for this. Wait...no. Never mind. It's gone.'

'Nice wheels,' Lisa said.

Seulgi smiled a nervous smile. 'Thanks. Sorry if it's, you know, illegal.'

'Forget it. Nothing's illegal here. Well, I mean, everything is, technically. But nothing's off limits. Can't say I've ever seen a van do that before.'

'I'll be honest, neither have-'

'Knight Rider!' Irene said. They both turned to her. 'That's who I was thinking of. Knight Rider. Y'know, the car? Eh. Forget it.'

'Uh huh,' Lisa said. 'Well. Catch you later. Nice driving again, by the way.'

'Thanks,' Seulgi said, rubbing her head. When Lisa was gone she let out an enormous sigh and Irene just laughed.

'I'm never doing that again.'

'Well,' Irene said. 'I think you've kinda got to, right?'

'I don't even want to get behind the wheel of thing again.'

'Relax.'

'I thought I was going to die.'

Irene giggled again. She leant forward and kissed Seulgi softly and grabbed her belt and pulled her closer and kissed her again. Seulgi could smell the jasmine and sandalwood. 'You're alive,' she said. 'And you did great.'

'Why the did you not text me? Or answer my calls.'

'House policy.'

'What?'

'Wendy said I had to leave my phone in a safety deposit box if I wanted to help her.'

'Why?'

'Dunno. In case I was recording, I guess. You know what she's like.'

'Oh, so you're best friends now or something?'

'Why?' Irene said, smirking. 'You jealous?'

'No. I mean- Whatever. Where is she?'

'Well, presumably still inside the van.'

'I need to have a word with her.'

'Yeah, about that. Babe.'

'What?'

'We've got bigger problems.'

'Like what?'

'I think you owe me a romantic meal.'

'What?'

Irene nodded a slight in the direction of the warehouse entrance. Even through the crowd they could make out Junho and his guys stood by the Supra and the black van. They were talking to a couple of other men in suits and one of them stole a glance at Seulgi and Irene and then turned away.

'I don't wanna say you were wrong or anything, but...I think you were wrong.'

'What do you mean?'

'That's the guy you beat the other day, right? Over there.'

'Yeah. Junho. He's racing against us later, too.'

'Right. Well. Please don't panic or anything.'

'What?'

Irene pulled her closer again. As if someone might be privy to their conversation. 'You see those guys he's talking to?' she said.

'Yeah. I see them.'

'They're the guys that beat me in that Baccarat game. The guys who won the car off me. And they're looking over here again.'

',' Seulgi said.

'Yeah. I can't read lips very well but I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it's probably not good. So.'

'So.'

'So I'm thinking your little idea about this Lisa chick being the mastermind gun smuggler is probably wrong. I'm thinking it's those guys.'

'Why?'

'Look at them. Or don't, please. But why else would they have a black van if they weren't racing? With tinted ing windows. To transport guns, babe. I'm telling ya, it's him. And now they're onto us, I just know it.'

'Onto us. How?'

'The guys they're talking to. The guys that beat me.'

'Yeah.'

'They'll know about Changmin. They'll know the car is his.'

'Alright.'

'Jesus,' Irene muttered, 'you're slow sometimes. And so they'll know he got arrested the other day, right? Which means they'll know whoever's got his car-'

'Is a cop. .'

'Bingo. So, like I said, don't panic.'

Seulgi eyed them for only a moment. They were looking at Lisa and saying something among themselves like conspirators at a gathering. 'They'll think she's in on it, too,' Seulgi said.

'What? Who?'

'Lisa.'

'Why?'

'Because she was talking to us. Because she let us race. And because she doesn't know yet that Changmin was arrested. They'll think she's an informant. Which means she’s in as much trouble as us.'

'You can't know that.'

'We don't know anything for certain,' Seulgi said. 'This is all guesswork.'

'Point taken. What do we do, then?'

'I don't know. .'

'What?'

She nodded to the shifting of the crowd. Two other cars driving out of the warehouse entrance and onto the street.

'It's starting.'

'Time for us to race?' Irene said.

'We can't.'

'We kinda have to.'

'What about her? And them?'

Seulgi was quiet a moment. She cursed under her breath. The van still sat there, watching her, goading her into driving it. Saying: Come on, you ! Put me into fifth gear, I dare you!

'Damn it,' she said.

'Babe.'

'Yeah. , Irene. What do we do?'

She looked to Irene but Irene was looking about. When she turned back she nodded to herself and herself only. 'Okay,' she said. 'Babe, do you trust me?'

'What?'

'Do you trust me?'

'Yeah. Of course.'

'Okay, then listen. I've got a plan.'

 

♣   ♣   ♣

 

She listened to the engine rumble with a sort of tension she hadn't felt in a long time. Not since Jisoo was singing Stayin' Alive to the beat of Irene's chest. It never occurred to her that that had happened less than a week ago, nor that the frequency of such events perhaps said something about her choice of lifestyle. And Irene's, too.

'This is ing suicide,' she said, to no reply. She thought Wendy would say something but Wendy was busy doing absolutely nothing in the back of the van. The girl stepped out into the road and dropped the THREE again. She took only a half-second to eye the other drivers. A few she didn't know. One of the Dodges from earlier. Then right at the front were Junho's bright orange Supra and the red Demon, so loud she could hear the pained whine of the enormous supercharger even from the cabin of the van. The girl dropped the TWO, the ONE.

'Hey,' Irene said. 'Maybe we should think of something el-'

She was interrupted by what sounded like the end of the world but was in fact Seulgi putting her foot down and flooring the acceleration.

'Jesus Christ, I'm going to die. Again.'

They were up to the first corner before Wendy or Irene could react. All they could hear was the vast report of engines in the open night. Small lights flickering in windows where people had come to see what the holy living that racket was, and then seeing a white Ford Transit van with a thousand horsepower powersliding around the corner and rubbing their eyes and thinking: Am I still asleep? Probably.

'This thing is so ing cool,' Irene said, laughing to herself. They made the second corner and came out along the street closest to the riverfront. It was a long straight, about a mile or more, and down to their left were rows of grass banks and below the footpath and the wide arch of a footbridge which served no practical purpose but, admittedly, looked rather pretty. There was no time to stop and think about how insane Irene's plan was. No time at all. They were neck and neck with the Supra on the left and the Demon on the right, all three fighting for the lead. And gaining on the end of the straight.

'Now!' Irene said, peering out of the passenger's window. 'Do it now!'

She did. There was no point thinking about how much of a lunatic she was or how ed they were about to be because at that stage she'd already turned the wheel. The van veered off wildly to the right at about a hundred miles an hour and caught Lisa's wheel and spun her off down the grass banks. Seulgi watched for but a moment. She had no time to correct the course of the van, only slow it a little. The Supra and the others disappeared in a cloud of tiresmoke and were gone around another corner, known only by their sound evaporating in the night.

Lisa's Demon had been stopped by the bridge. She'd slowed it enough to have only done minimal damage to the bodywork but the paint had been disintegrated in the impact with the van and now she stood rubbing her head and cursing to herself at the smoking wreckage.

Seulgi pulled the van up about fifteen metres behind the bridge and sat a minute trying to gain her senses.

'Woah,' Wendy said, leaning forward and looking out the windscreen. 'Cool.'

'Right?' said Irene. 'Knew it'd work.'

Seulgi glared at her. By the time the two of them had climbed out of the cab Lisa was already in front of her.

'What the are you doing?' she said. 'Are you insane?'

'Lisa-'

'You drove straight into me!'

'Lisa, just-'

'You've ing lost it. You know, here I was thinking you were a good driver, and then-'

'Shut up!' Irene said. 'Please, shut up.'

Lisa looked at her. The anger simmering in her eyes. She rubbed her head and spat and swore under her breath again.

'Don't worry about it,' said Irene. 'The crash, I mean. After a while you get used to it.'

'What?'

'Yeah, it's all Gucci. I actually died last week in a crash like this. Crazy . Anyway. Babe.'

Lisa looked at Seulgi. As if searching for an answer that might magically appear. Seulgi looked about. They could hear the cars in the distance and they didn't sound like they were driving away anymore.

'What is this?' Lisa said. 'Why'd you do that?'

'Your life is in danger.'

'Well, it probably is now. I wouldn't be surprised if I've got a ing haemorrhage.'

‘Or an aneurysm,’ Irene said.

'Just listen to me,' Seulgi said. 'Please. For a second.'

'Listen to what?'

'There's no time to explain it all.'

'What?'

Seulgi was quiet a moment. Craning her neck as if to see back up the road they had drifted away from. The grass on the banks had been obliterated in the squealing wake of their wet tires. 'Look,' she said, 'there's someone in the Black Flags that's selling weapons.'

'What?'

'Gunrunners. Shipping illegal firearms across Korea and the East, using your outfit as a cover.'

'I don't understand.'

'It's that with the shiny car,' Irene said. 'What's his name? The one with the big head.'

'Junho?'

'See, babe? Visual clues work every time.'

'Will somebody tell me what the is going on?'

She looked to Seulgi for an answer and Seulgi sighed. 'She's right. We think it's Junho selling weapons, and he's using you and your group to hide it because he knows the police don't bother with you. We don't have the manpower for it.'

'We?'

'We're-'

'Cops. You're cops.'

Seulgi nodded.

'I ing knew it! I smelt it on you!'

'Uh huh.'

'What's it smell like?' Irene said. 'I've always wanted to smell like a cop.'

'Listen,' said Seulgi. 'You're in a lot of trouble if you don't come with us right now.'

Lisa laughed dryly.

'I'm serious. They're going to think you're involved with us. They know we're cops.'

'They do? How?'

'They know Changmin was arrested the other day. And that black Camaro we used? The one she lost in a gambling game? That was his, and they know that. So now they know we busted him and took his car. And now they think you're undercover as well.'

'What?'

'Because you helped us.'

'I didn't know you were-'

'Cops. Right. But they're not going to believe that.'

'What the is going on?'

They stopped and listened. Cars coming back and much too fast. ',' Seulgi said. 'There's no time.'

'Time for what?'

'Come with me if you want to live.'

She ran back to the van and started up the engine and pulled out before Irene and Lisa had even closed the passenger door. By the time she'd swung the van around and started back along the waterfront path the Supra and another black Mercedes were on the street parallel to them and chasing fast.

'.'

Irene giggled.

'What's so funny about this?'

'You.'

'What?'

'You said: Come with me if you want to live. Like the Terminator.'

Seulgi glanced at her for only a second and she shrugged.

'Just thought it was cute, is all. And really appropriate.'

'Wendy, you still back there?'

'Yeah, man,' Wendy said, throwing up a peace sign. Seulgi peered out the window. They were going sixty along a path that was far too narrow and at the next flat bank she swung the van up and back onto the road going in the opposite direction they'd first gone through the destitute Itaewon streets. The Supra and the Mercedes were right behind them.

'Can you do something?' Seulgi said.

'Do what?'

'About them.'

Wendy was quiet a moment, thinking. Then she said, 'I got you, man.'

'Where are we going?' Irene said, leaning and looking through the wingmirror. Lisa just sat there. As if she couldn't quite believe anything that was happening.

Seulgi hit the gas pedal and shifted into third at ninety. 'I don't know,' she said. 'Wherever.'

'You mean you don't have a plan?'

'Me? You were the one that told me to do that!'

'Well, yeah...but that's about it. Now I'm stumped.'

'Jesus, sometimes I wonder why- Look out!'

They had no time to react before they heard metal snapping and tearing. Then they heard the bullets a split second later, the sound carrying in the air like a whistle. The Mercedes had pulled up alongside them and a guy with his body half out the window let loose with a machinepistol until he'd emptied the entire magazine into the side of the van. The sound was enormous. Seulgi turned left at the next corner. It was hard to see or concentrate on much of anything.

'Everyone okay?' she said.

'Yo,' Irene said, sitting up again, 'these guys are on some hardcore . They've got Uzis!'

'Anyone want to tell me what the is going on?' Lisa said, holding on to the side of Irene's seat for her life. They slid too fast around another corner and caught the tail end of a parked car and immediately set off the alarm. The Mercedes slowed a slight behind them and the Supra tailed the Mercedes so that they made a trio of rather unusual cars going twice the speed limit in a built-up area like action men from a film setpiece. Wendy was busy sorting through her crates and piling stuff on the floor and fitting the pieces together like big Lego bricks.

'Wendy,' said Seulgi, glimpsing her through the rear-view mirror for only a second. 'You want to help us out here or what?'

She held up a little peace sign over her shoulder again. 'Don't worry, man,' she said. 'I've got your back like a buttcrack.'

Seulgi slowed the van a slight on the next turn. They were heading west and soon they would be along the riverfront again and a moment later they came out into the clearing of the road and saw the dark shadow of Yanghwa Bridge looming not two or three minutes away.

'There,' Irene said. 'Go on, I dare you.'

'What?'

'Take the bridge.'

She turned in her seat to see Wendy dragging something heavy to the doors of the van.

'Wendy. What are you doing?'

She didn't reply. Seulgi tried to keep the van straight and level and Wendy kicked the back doors open and perched herself on one knee and lifted the enormous gadget like a rocket launcher over one shoulder.

'Is that an RPG?' Irene said.

'No, man. Magnet gun.'

'Magnet...magnet gun?'

She nodded to nobody. The van swerved and righted and the Mercedes was gaining behind them. The guy with the Uzi was still reloading. 'Yeah,' Wendy said. 'Totally cool. And not Soviet design.'

'Who designed it?'

'Whodya think?'

'You.'

'Totally. Groovy!'

'What does it do?' Irene said. She had to shout to be heard over the tremor of the engines. Lisa looked at Seulgi as if to ask what the was going on but Seulgi's eyes were on the road.

'It does what you think it does,' Wendy said. 'It magnetises, man. It attracts.'

'Attracts what?'

'Metal. Like the metal in their guns.'

She pressed something on the device and all they heard was a terrible whirring sound like a vacuum cleaner and then the floor of the van began shaking a little. She pointed the magnet gun at the Mercedes. Junho slowed the Supra and backed a good distance away. As if he already knew.

'Wait,' Irene said. 'It's a magnet gun.'

'Uh huh. You might want to hold onto something.'

'And it attracts metal.'

'That it does!'

'Like the metal in their guns.'

'Bingo, man.'

'And the metal in their...'

'Their what?'

'Their cars...'

Wendy turned to look at her. She was wearing her ridiculous Elton John star glasses. 'Huh,' she said. 'I hadn't thought of-'

'Look out!'

Seulgi swerved the van out of the way just in time. The Mercedes peeled away from the road nose-first and tipped on its crumpled hood and went rolling down the street beside them like an upturned aluminium domino. When it stopped it looked like it had been the victim of some insane natural disaster. The van wobbled and slid and Lisa and Irene almost fell out of the cab and Seulgi hit the brakes and downshifted and made for the bridge. The magnet gun had fallen out of the back and was gone. Wendy sat rubbing her head and pondering something.

'Holy !' Irene said, laughing like a mad woman.

'I should've thought that through more carefully.'

'Babe, the bridge! Hurry.'

'I am,' Seulgi said.

Lisa shook her head. 'You're crazy,' she muttered. 'All crazy.'

They turned to look back at the open doors. All of Seoul rolling away behind them at a hundred miles per hour. And Junho in the orange Supra gaining again.

'Uh, Wendy,' said Seulgi.

'Yo.'

'A little help, please?'

'. Right.' She hobbled back to the open crates like a monkey and hauled out something equally large and equally metal and equally ridiculous from inside one of them and laid it on the ground.

Irene laughed in disbelief. 'Is that-'

'A harpoon gun. Yeah, man.'

'What?' Seulgi said, eyes on the road. They were coming up to the bottom of the bridge turn-on and there was little traffic. 'Why the do you have a harpoon gun?'

'Well. To harpoon things with.'

'Like what?'

'Like this. Watch.'

She set the gun on the ground by the doors and lined it up and punched something on the back of it. The great metal spike went soaring out into the night with a pneumatic hiss. It flew over the roof of Junho's Supra and shattered the back window and there it landed, lodged against the frame of his backseats, unmoving, stuck.

'Now what?' Irene said.

'Now we, uh...I actually don't know.'

'This is crazy,' Lisa said again. She had a hand over the glass-encased button without even realising it. 'And what the is this?'

'No, wait! Don't press-'

She pressed it. The van lurched and kicked them all backward and Wendy almost fell out and would have done if she didn't grab hold of the side of the inner door hinges with one hand and the harpoon cannon with the other, splayed out like she had been caught in the middle of some rather strenuous exercise. Seulgi tried everything - downshifting, shortshifting, shifting up, breaking as hard as she could. The van was still going seventy along the bridge and the wheels were spinning left and the back end of the van kicking right. She spun the wheel as hard as it would go into the slide and then spun it right and then when she tried to correct it a third time the steeringwheel came off in her hands.

'Oh, . Oh . Uh, Wendy. Wendy!'

'Yo, man!'

'The wheel's come off.'

'What?'

'The ing wheel's come off! What do I do?'

'Oh ,' Irene said. 'That's, uh. That's not good.'

They were going forty and then thirty-five and drifting sideways across both lanes but it was too late to do anything. Seulgi sat there trying to put the wheel back on. They went slamming into the concrete first and then the bridge railings and one of the girders and they were not slowing. It was too late to do anything except pray that they would not die. They felt the full brunt of the concrete shattered by the weight of the van and the metal railings. The next thing they felt was nothing, an airy weightlessness, and it wasn't for a good three seconds that any of the four of them realised they were nosediving into the Han River.

'Oh !' Lisa said. Wendy went sprawling backward and fell against Irene's seat and laid out like a corpse. Irene turned. The last thing she saw before the van hit the water was Junho's harpooned Supra being dragged in behind them like a fish on a line.

 

♣   ♣   ♣

 

They had seconds before they would inevitably begin to drown. By some minor miracle the airbags had not gone off and they were all conscious, if only barely. Seulgi blinked and looked about. Thinking: That ing aneurysm's coming any day now, I just know it.

'Are you okay?' she said. Lisa groaned. Irene held a thumb up and Wendy rubbed her head and coughed and tried to sit up and failed miserably.

'Oh, ,' Irene said. 'We're, uh. Well. I think we're ed.'

'No, man. Hey, Seulgs.'

'Don't call me-'

'Now's not really the time, is it babe?' Irene said.

Seulgi glared at her and sighed.

'Hit that button on the dashboard,' said Wendy.

'Which one?'

'That one.'

There were four buttons.

'Which?'

'The red one.'

One was red. One, crimson. One, a darker red. One, burgundy. She punched the one on the left. They heard a little popping noise and then a tinny explosion and a great burst of pink light erupted in the atmosphere somewhere above them, bright enough that they had to wince. Except Wendy in her Elton Johns.

'What was that?'

'Distress flare,' Wendy said. 'Why'd you press that, man?'

'You said the red button!'

'I meant the other red button.'

Seulgi punched the second button and was rewarded with a deafening siren and a man's robot voice saying: WARNING. WARNING. THIS VEHICLE CONTAINS DANGEROUS RADIOACTIVE CHEMICALS. PLEASE CLEAR THE ROAD. WARNING. WARNING.

She punched it again and it died away. They sat holding their ears and grimacing.

'No, man,' Wendy said. 'The other red one. On the far right.'

She thumbed the last one. They felt the air seemingly expand underneath them. The water stopped seeping in. Then they realised at last that they were not sinking any longer. They were just floating on the water. Just bobbing about.

'What was that?' Seulgi said.

'Hovercraft.'

'It's a ing hovercraft?'

'Uh, kinda. Got no engine, though. But we won't sink. Not for...well, sixty minutes.'

'Why didn't you mention that before?'

She made a gesture that said: I dunno, actually.

'Oh ,' Irene said again.

'What?'

She nodded to something out of the passenger window. It was the Supra, slowly sinking, Junho floating just on the surface like an enormous bathplug, gasping into the cold.

'I guess that worked.'

'Jesus,' Seulgi said.

'You can thank Wendy for that. Everybody say it together: Thank you, Wendy.'

'You're welcome,' Wendy said with a lazy grin. Lisa just looked at them.

'Sorry about that.'

'You're ing crazy,' she said. 'Every single one of you. You should be dead. , I should be dead. We all should.'

'Yeah, well. Crazy's my middle name. My other middle name. After Intolerable. And Insatiable. And- Y'know what? Forget it.'

 

♣   ♣   ♣

 

When the van and the Supra had been pulled out of the water they got out and stood around not quite knowing what to do next, or who to talk to. The other police cruisers had begun to pull up along the banks and the man in the tow truck and the man in the rescue boat both struck up conversations with the officers. They nodded. They looked over at Junho with his arms cuffed behind his back and then Seulgi and Irene where they stood as if to say: It's these two clowns again. Of course it is.

Lisa came back a couple minutes later. She had been catching her breath and pinching herself to make sure everything had not been strange feverdream. She stood a minute looking at the two of them. A pair of jokers fit for one another only.

'I suppose I should thank you,' she said. 'For saving my life.'

'Don't mention it,' Irene said.

Lisa turned to Seulgi. 'You really were a pretty good driver. Shame you're a cop.'

'Sorry about the car,' Seulgi said.

'It'll buff out. Sorry about the...actually, I don't know what I have to be sorry over.'

'Nothing, really.'

'Are you going to arrest me now?'

Seulgi thought about it for a minute. Then she said, 'Legally, you've done nothing wrong. As long as you get in your car and drive away before we show up again.'

'What?'

'We'll handle it. Consider it our apology for ruining your evening.'

'You saved my life.'

'Only technically,' Irene said. 'There was always the possibility Junho would have just tortured you instead. In which case...actually, never mind. Ignore me.'

Lisa made a face that said: I've learned that part already. 'Thanks again,' she said to Seulgi.

'Uh huh. Maybe we'll see you around sometime.'

'Don't count on it.'

When she was halfway back along the path she turned against the night and winced and said, 'Just for the record, I would've had you on that last corner.'

'Uh huh.'

'I always do.'

'I don't doubt that.'

They watched her disappear. None of the officers bothered to stop her. Perhaps they were all too concerned with how a Transit van had plummeted a hundred feet from Yanghwa Bridge into the river and then floated away. Or perhaps they simply didn't care. Irene stood with her arms folded in front of her chest, giggling.

'What?' Seulgi said.

'What do you think of that?'

'Think of what?'

'Her beating you.'

'She's just saying that to save face.'

'Well...'

'Well what?'

'Would she have?'

'Beaten me?'

Irene nodded. Seulgi was quiet a moment. Then she said, 'Not a chance. She didn't have the power in a straight line.'

She was rewarded with another laugh and a kiss on the cheek. They waited in the cold until Hongki and Wheein showed up half an hour later in Wheein's Hyundai and stepped out and stood there looking at everything twice and then four times like aliens unused to human recognition. Wheein resting against the top of the car's door, Hongki balancing precariously on his crutch. He saw Seulgi and Irene and hobbled over to them like a man not fifty-five but ninety and stood a moment. He smelled of incense, as usual.

Seulgi looked at Wheein over his shoulder. She was laughing.

'Kang,' he said.

'Yes sir.'

He opened his mouth to say something. She thought he would tell her she was fired, or perhaps that he had found out it was her that shot him in the leg, or something about Switzerland, or how Irene was going back to jail, but no. He just opened his mouth and closed it again and opened it a third time and then he said, 'You know what? Whatever.'

'Sir.'

'Whatever.'

Then he motioned for Wheein to start the car and get out of there. Irene managed to hold her laughter in until they were gone from sight and the only company they kept were the officers tasked with piecing together an impossible series of events.

'Only us,' Irene said. 'That could literally only happen to us.'

'I'm not even sure it did. I might still be dreaming.'

'I'm hungry.'

'What?'

'I want something to eat.'

'You've just been in a car crash. Again. Again again, I mean. Actually...again again again again. If I'm counting correctly.'

'I know, right?' Irene turned to her, confused at something. 'It's like this biological reaction to me being in life-threatening situations. Crazy. When I died I wanted some party sausages as well. I wonder what that's about. God, Pavlov would have loved me.'

They sat in the van's cabin a while in silence. Not really knowing what to do. The hovercraft skirts had deflated a long time ago. It smelled of damp and sweat and faintly of the perfume Lisa had been wearing.

'She was pretty cool,' Irene said.

'Who? Lisa?'

'Yeah. Don't you think?'

'I mean...I guess.'

Irene smiled a precious smile. A smile of many mischievous things. 'Not as cool as you though, Miss Johnson. How many people do you see powersliding vans in three-piece suits? And by the way, you owe me a romantic dinner.'

'What? Why?'

'Uh, we made a bet, remember? And you lost.'

Seulgi was quiet a minute. Then she leant forward and kissed Irene and said, 'I'm sorry for ever doubting you.'

'I did kinda save the day, didn't I? Maybe I'm actually getting used to this whole cop thing, after all. I mean, ignoring the whole getting-drunk-and-losing-your-car shebang. Forget that.'

'We've all got our issues,' Seulgi said.

'True. Like how you're a good driver and a great detective but really you've been sent back in time to kill the saviour of the human race and ensure the survival of the robot species.'

'What the are you talking about?'

'It was a Terminator joke. You know? Never mind. Can we get something to eat now? I'm owed, big time.'

Seulgi just looked at her.

'What?'

'I'm glad you're okay,' Seulgi said, leaning forward and kissing her again. She made to pull back and Irene giggled against her lips and kissed her for a long time, so tender and loving and beautiful and full of tongue and rather messy and absolutely needed and interrupted fifteen seconds later by somebody coughing that was not Irene or Seulgi. They flinched and jerked back and turned around.

'Wendy?'

She was sat on the floor with a bunch of gadgets between her legs and she gave a little wave. 'Hey, man,' she said. 'Yeah, don't mind me. I was just...ya know.'

'Why are you even here?' Seulgi said.

'Uh, this is my van.'

'Oh. Right. Sorry about that.'

'Eh. Forget it. Water under the bridge. Get it? Because we were...never mind.'

'I get it,' Irene said. 'Groovy. Hey, what's this button on the dashboard for, by the way? The one Seulgi didn't press. Is it a rocket launcher? Or, like, invisibility.'

'Oh, that's just music, man. Yeah, I kinda forgot to add a stereo before I rewired all the electrics for the nitrous and the flare gun but I figured I needed at least something, ya know? A groovy tune.'

'What song is it?'

'What?'

'The button. What song?'

Wendy threw up a little peace sign and grinned like an idiot. 'Danger Zone,' she said. 'By Kenny Loggins.'

Irene laughed. 'Of course,' she said. 'Of course it is. Babe, you know what?'

'What?' Seulgi said.

'This - all of this.'

'Yeah?'

'I think it might just be fate.'