It was three years ago in early spring, she remembered. The cherry blossoms have not bloomed and the air was still cold from the leaving winter. Nana was at home with a nanny she hired for the day and chores at home were all done the day before. She was walking hand in hand with the love of her life beside her on a street that had trees lining up the path. Leaves were beginning to appear, a clear sign of winter ending, but the wind was still as cold as ever.

They were walking back from the hospital that day, with Maiyan insisting on waking home instead of taking a cab. After two weeks in and out of the hospital, they were told that what Maiyan had was terminal, and that treatment could only delay its progression. Maiyan was surprisingly quiet the entire time, opening only to say thank you and that she understands as they leave the doctor's office. Nanase was still talking as they were in the hallway, saying how they'll get a third opinion and that she's having none of this nonsense, all the way to the parking lot. As they walk towards a parked cab, Maiyan lightly grabbed her wrist, gently turning her around to say that she preferred if they just walked home today, slowly, by foot. She said she wanted to take the long way home. Strangely to herself, Nanase agreed to Maiyan's request despite not being a walker herself.

So that's how they ended up walking down this street, she thought to herself as she turned to look at Maiyan who was walking alongside her. Maiyan had this red scarf around her neck that barely concealed her angular jaw that traced all the way to her ears, which was pink from the cold weather. Her hair was in this side parting fashion that she always wore, strands on the side resting lightly by her high cheekbones that further accentuated her now noticeably sunken cheeks. Brown pupils nestled in tired eyes that had dark circles under them. She had this alert but stern gaze, almost snobbish in a way, a look naturally given out when Maiyan wears her resting face without any expression. This is the face she usually sees of Maiyan, the face when she's focused on something, the face when she's driving, when she's eating, when she's walking, working. Literally the face Maiyan has when she isn't feeling anything in particular. The very face she fell in love with. The face of the parent of her child, the face of her life partner, her best friend, her lover. The face of a woman who is her entire world. The face she wakes up to every morning and sleeps to every night. The face that she might never see again.

Nanase's steps was brought to a sudden halt. The sole of her boots produced a scraping noise on the hard pavement beneath it. The two women then stood still, facing each other in the chill late afternoon weather.

She could feel Maiyan's hands gently tracing up her arms, resting just below the shoulders, holding her. Her face was then brushed lightly with cold fingers that gently lifted up her face into view. She was crying. She knew Maiyan could see that she was crying. She was trying NOT to cry. She was trying to be strong. She was trying. She swears she was.

But Maiyan also had tears in her eyes, as Nanase looked up. Maiyan was looking straight at her with eyes that she could not read. Then Nanase started to sob.

"What are we going to do..?" Nanase quietly muttered.

"I don't know, but I love you very much" Maiyan replied.

"I love you too" Nanase said.

They embraced, albeit a little roughly, almost desperately even, clinging to one another. Their bodies pressing against each other, transferring heat against the cold wind. They stayed that way for a while. Praying for the time to stop. Wishing for the world to stop spinning. Nanase had her head wresting on Maiyan's shoulder, her arms tightly wrapped around Maiyan's waist. Nanase knew Maiyan was holding her as tight as she could, and Nanase too was trying her best, wishing that her arms be longer so that she could just entangle them together this way forever.

But Maiyan suddenly whispered in her ear that they should go home now since Nana is at home and they told the nanny they would be home by evening. Nanase let out a little restrained eye roll at Maiyan's sudden tactless statement and sniped that Maiyan will be Maiyan no matter what the situation is. Maiyan gave her a cheeky smile, putting her arm around Nanase's shoulders. They continued walking, with Nanase's arm around Maiyan's waist and Maiyan's around her shoulders. As they were walking Maiyan was looking straight in front her, sometimes gazing at the scenery and stealing looks at Nanase who was right beside her. But Nanase's eyes never left Maiyan's face since they started walking, a doing that she herself was not aware of.

Was it greed? She thought to herself. Was it her, trying to salvage whatever time they have left? Was it her trying to capture this image of Maiyan's face, in hopes she'll have this moment forever? Was it her, admitting defeat to this disease...that she now simply rests on the fact that this woman beside her will soon leave her behind? She doesn't know, she thought. For once in her life, her mind was blank. All she wanted to do was to look at this face beside her. All she wanted was this person at her side. All she wanted was just. More. Time.