Chapter 23

 

“Don’t you know my feelings for you?” The captain poses the question with a pout. 

 

"I hope they'll never change."

 

“Of course I know.” Irene replies, with one hand patting Seulgi’s cheek. “Silly bear.” 

 

“Let me just double confirm it.”

 

With a click, Seulgi takes off her seatbelt and the next moment, Irene finds her girlfriend on top of her, with their lips locked together and full-on making out. After the initial shock, she eases into the kiss and wraps her arms around Seulgi too. 

 

Seulgi’s hands starts to be a little more daring, sliding along the length of her body and getting closer to her chest. She pulls in Irene by the nape, to taste the latter for the last time before they part. 

 

Seulgi knows in her heart that there is no doubt that she will be on the verge of going crazy without seeing Irene for the next few days. But for now, those concerns can wait. 

 

As their lips part, Seulgi opens her eyes slowly and Irene’s beauty up close surprises her yet again. Those beautiful, deep brown eyes are a sight to marvel indeed. 

 

“You’re so beautiful, Hyun-ah.” Seulgi tells her sincerely. “I’m serious.” 

 

Her girlfriend who is looking back at her, with lips still slightly parted, breaks into a beautiful smile.

 

“You have told me that so many times already. I’m starting to get bored of it.” Irene muses, but the soft look in her eyes tells Seulgi that she is happy. 

 

“Hyun-ah, I need to tell you something right now.” Seulgi spontaneously decides on something important at that moment. The look in her eyes has never been this determined. 

 

“Hmm?”

 

Seulgi leaves a dramatic pause to give Irene another gentle kiss, but the latter is too stunned at the moment to even appreciate it. This moment...Irene cannot say that she did not anticipate it coming, but all along, she thought she was going to say it first. 

 

“Listen to me carefully.” Seulgi pokes Irene’s cheek to bring her back to reality. She clears dramatically and takes a deep breath. “Here goes nothing...Hyun-ah” 

 

Seulgi looks at her girlfriend and smiles upon seeing her clueless expression. She takes Irene’s hands into her own and begins slowly, “I want to let you know that you have become a very important person in my life. You are amazing in so many ways and your support has made me grown into a better person. That was when I knew. I-“ 

 

“Ppa-ppa-ppalgan mat, gunggeumhae honey”

 

They both look at each other, wide-eyed, as the ringtone reverberates in the quiet car. 

 

What a timing. 

 

Irene is the first to collect herself and she nudges the captain, “Seulgi, your phone.” She breaks into a giggle, thinking about how ridiculous this is. 

 

“H-Huh?” The captain blinks, still hovering on top of Irene in her seat, in a half-sitting and standing position, without moving an inch. 

 

"Kkaemulmyeon jeomjeom nogadeun strawberry geu mat"

 

Irene adores how clueless Seulgi can be at times, despite being the all-knowing captain. 

 

“Your phone is ringing.” She informs the bear. 

 

“Oh yeah. Damn it...Of all timings...” She removes herself from her hovering position and goes back to her seat. “I swear I’m gonna kill whoever who is rushing me for prac-“ She mutters under her breath as picks up her phone from her side door. 

 

“What...”

 

"Corner candy shop chaja bwa baby"

 

Irene whips her head to face Seulgi, who is holding up her blank screen with her lips pursed. 

 

“Not my phone this time.” 

 

“Someone’s calling me?” Irene asks, surprised. She digs her bag for her phone and realises it is her phone ringing instead. 

 

Meanwhile, Seulgi has started to grumble to herself in her seat, with her arms crossed unhappily. 

 

“Whose great idea is it to have matching ring tones? Wait, its mine. Ugh, I hate myself.” 

 

“Sorry babe. Wendy’s calling me. That’s weird, she never calls me unless something is urgent.” Irene looks at Seulgi sheepishly. “Can I pick it up?”

 

“Does it matter if I say no?” Seulgi grumbles. 

 

“Nope.” Irene chuckles and gives Seulgi a peck for compensation. “You’re the best...Hi Seungwan, what up?”

 

Seulgi watches on to the conversation from the corner of her eye. She notices how Irene’s face dropped a little when she heard something and her voice drops to a murmur. “Oh-um okay. I’ll be right there. Thanks for calling. Bye.” 

 

“What’s up?”

 

“Prof Park wants to meet me now regarding my results. I have to go.” Irene replies, as a matter of factly. She tried her best to hide the fear in her voice. 

 

“Baby, don’t worry too much about it. You will be fine.” Seulgi reaches out and squeezes Irene’s hand for support. “You can always call me for moral support okay?” 

 

“I’m fine, silly bear.” Irene returns the hand squeeze with a small smile. “ I’ll make a move first okay?” Irene informs, ready to leave with her bag already ready in her hands. 

 

“Wait!” Seulgi panics and grabs Irene’s wrist by reflex, not wanting her to leave so quickly. Her heart is not ready to part yet. 

 

“Hmm?” Her girlfriend stares back at her innocently. 

 

“Um...Let me walk you there!” Seulgi blurts out. 

 

Irene bursts into a chuckle, “Its okay. The administrative building is in the opposite direction of the dance studio. I don’t want the captain to be late on her first day of competition trainings.”

 

Right. In that moment, the captain has temporarily forgotten her duties when she is around her lover. She mentally chides herself for being so irresponsible but the heart wants what it wants and it belongs to Irene. 

 

“Okay...” Seulgi sighs. 

 

“Goodbye for real.“ Irene gently pushes Seulgi’s hand away from her wrist, and pats her head. “Don’t miss me too much.” She instructs her kiddingly. 

 

“You know that is impossible. Wait, one last thing.”

 

“What else is there, silly bear?” The latter sighs for the umpteenth time. 

 

“Let me have one last kiss?” Seulgi requests, with a cheeky smile plastered on her face. She puckers her lips and the model student leans in to grant her wish for the final time. 

 

Once their lips touch, they both pull in a deeper kiss, wrapping their arms around each other’s body. 

 

At that moment before things heat up, they hear two knocks on Seulgi’s car hood. They both look up at the interruption, only to see Jisoo waving at them. When their eyes met, Irene felt her heart sank. 

 

“Luckily she stopped us in time.” Seulgi chuckles and waves back at her best friend. “Good thing she’s here as that means I don’t have to walk to the studio alone! Lets go out and meet her, Hyunnie!” 

 

Irene feels a wave of mixed feelings hit her, seeing how Seulgi is too enthusiastic about meeting Jisoo. 

 

Do you like her so much?

 

“Seulgi, can you do something for me?” Irene asks her solemnly, all of a sudden. 

 

“Yes?” 

 

“You haven’t opened the car door for me in ages. Can you do it for me now?” 

 

“That’s a strange request but sure, anything for my princess.” Seulgi shrugs and proceeds without any questions. She jogs to Irene’s side and opens the car door for her lady. 

 

“My princess, mind your head.” Seulgi places a hand at the edge of the car frame, before offering Irene a hand with her charming eyesmile. 

 

“Thank you.” Irene takes her hand and steps out of the car. From the corner of her eye, she notices the slightly sour expression on Jisoo’s face. It makes the girl smirk internally while walking to Jisoo, hand-in-hand with her captain. 

 

“Morning Jisoo!” Seulgi exclaims, unknowing about the tension between the other two. 

 

“Morning Seulgi.” Jisoo greets Seulgi with a warm smile first, full of affection. “Hi Irene, its been a while.” Jisoo directs it to the latter, with a more reserved smile. 

 

“Hi Jisoo.” Irene returns it, “Its good to see you too.”

 

The rivalry between the two girls is something that existed from the beginning. Whenever they see each other without any of their common friends’ presence, only polite smiles are returned, sometimes even none. 

 

Irene does not hate Jisoo but to her, is just like a ticking time bomb she can never dispose of. It frustrates her a little to be honest. 

 

Jisoo starts with a worried expression, “Are you alright? I heard you disappeared after seeing the results. I could only imagine that it must have been a huge blow to you.” 

 

Irene finds herself unknowingly tightening her grip on Seulgi’s hand. This is not a topic she has expected to be hit with first thing in the morning. 

 

Being the attentive girlfriend, Seulgi notices Irene’s discomfort immediately. She states firmly, “Lets not talk about it-“ 

 

“Its okay, Seul.” Irene pats her girlfriend’s arm and smiles. She shall respond to this gracefully. “I am fine now, thanks for your concern. But really, I am most thankful for this silly bear, who came all the way to Gyeongju to find me. Right, babe?” 

 

“Yep.” Seulgi replies with a sweet smile. She looks at her girlfriend and when their eyes meet, a feeling of warmth gushes into her heart. She remembers how they played on the beach yesterday and more importantly, how beautiful Joohyun looked in those moments. 

 

Meanwhile, much as Irene wants to be lost in Seulgi’s eyes, she could feel the imaginary daggers directed at her from the latter. And, she cannot help but slip out a smile, almost like a smirk. 

 

This serves Jisoo right for always threatening to take her Seulgi away. Seulgi, her adorable captain whom she is looking at, belongs to her only. 

 

Seulgi is mine. 

 

“Seul, we are late. Lets go.”

 

Seulgi checks the time and grins widely when she sees the new watch on her wrist, “Right. We should get going.” It is time for them to part, but having the watch makes her feel like Irene will never really be away from her. 

 

“See you soon, my princess.” Seulgi tells her softly, with a longing look that makes Irene’s heart ache. Irene nods with a hum, and lets go of Seulgi’s hand reluctantly to allow her to walk to Jisoo’s side. 

 

Once Seulgi steps over, Jisoo immediately interlock her arms, swift as a hawk. She gives an ambiguous smile to Irene, before walking away with Seulgi. 

 

Will we be truly alright? 

 

The captain turns around as if on cue, to give her one final wave happily. 

 

This image is something that will remain etched in Irene’s memory for a long time. 

 

 

———

 

 

“Wendy!” 

 

Wendy looks up from her seat and sees Irene rushing down the corridor. Irene glances at the small opening in the office window, before heaving a relieved sigh and sitting beside Wendy. 

 

“What’s with the sudden meeting?” Irene asks Wendy, who gives her an embarrassed grin. 

 

“I was going to tell you yesterday but you disappeared and we were all so busy finding you that I forgot about it. Joohyun-ah, I’m really sorry...Did I interrupt your make out session?” She teases Irene for fun, but the latter’s blush tells her she hit bulls-eye with her guess. 

 

“N-No. Shut up.” Irene could only deny, with her slightly flushed cheeks. Her blush deepens as flashbacks of Seulgi’s almost love confession came into mind. 

 

“I guess I really did! Haha! You two are so predictable.” Wendy deftly avoids the smack coming her way. She grabs Irene’s flying hand and smiles, “It’s adorable.” 

 

“Shut up.” Irene returns the same smile. 

 

“So how are you feeling now? Better?” Wendy holds Irene’s hand in her own and asks her friend with a warm gaze. 

 

“Hmm better,” Irene replies, while looking down at the ground. “I think I’m ready to doubly work hard again to earn back my position.” 

 

“About that I’m sorry...I-I felt really bad about it.” 

 

Her words touch a notch in Irene’s heart, but she suppresses the sour feeling and replies, “It is not your fault, Seungwan.” 

 

“I know but still, its your place. I know how much you hate losing, needless to say, losing to three other people.” 

 

“There’s only one person that irks me.” Irene grumbles to herself under her breath. She notices the uplift of eyebrows from Wendy and immediately adds, “It’s my own fault for being careless anyway. Actually in hindsight, it is good to falter once in a while. I needed this to remind myself to work harder.”

 

“You are already working really hard, Joohyun. Don’t burn yourself out.”

 

“I know. I will not. Thanks for the reminder.” Irene ends off with a firm smile, signifying this will be the last time they will talk about it. The heavy feeling in her heart begins to surface again. 

 

Why did I fail? 

 

The next moment, Irene could barely keep it together when facing her Professor. 

 

He leans forward and adjusts his steel-rimmed spectacles to take a good look at his best student. 

 

“You said your relationship wouldn’t affect your studies.” 

 

“It was not because of Seulgi.” Irene immediately replies, desperation etched in her voice. “I will work doubly hard and prove it to you in the next test. I promise.” 

 

“Irene, we had an agreement and I have already kept this from your parents long enough.” 

 

“Prof...p-please...” Irene chokes on her words as she is almost at the verge of breaking down. “Please do not let them know about us. Once they know, everything will be over...”

 

“That is for the best, Irene.” 

 

“No. no. Prof, please I-I...”

 

“Irene...don’t cry.” His heart softens. The professor offers a piece of tissue for the young girl to dry her tears. 

 

“Prof...”

 

“Fine. I will give you another chance. But if you do not improve, I cannot cover up for you any longer.”

 

“Thank you, Prof! Really, thank you!” Irene smiles brightly through her tears and bows down to thank him. 

 

He lets out a heavy sigh and looks into the eyes of his student who has changed so much that it hurts his heart. “Irene, you are so different from before. I’m worried for you. What if you regret all of this in the future?” 

 

“Prof, I know for sure that this is what I want.” 

 

He shakes his head and sighs, “It’s your choice, Irene. Don’t regret it.” 

 

“I won’t. Thank you again, Prof.” 

 

After she leaves the room, she sat outside for a while to collect her thoughts and dry her tears. 

 

Now, it is really success at all cost. The impending pressure makes her feel so miserable inside that a few tears manage to escape, just as she has wiped them away.

 

“Joohyun?”

 

Irene looks up to see Bogum looking down at her worriedly.

 

 

——

 

 

It has been two weeks since they last parted at the carpark. Irene has regained her position as first place in SM High and is steadily preparing for the next examination. 

 

Life has never been busier for both of them. While Irene is busy rushing between her supplementary classes and intense studying sessions, Seulgi is stuck in back-to-back dance practices every day. 

 

Seulgi has missed Irene so dearly over the past four days that she can barely stand still, while waiting for time to pass. All of her teammates would know how the captain has been losing her appetite lately. Other than losing her temper. 

 

The stress of being captain is starting to get to Seulgi, as she is now responsible for ensuring her team clinches the championship cup to continue the dance club’s five years streak. She stays back later than the rest to practice, choreographs late into the night but still, makes sure to do all her homework so that Irene will not be disappointed. This leaves her absolutely physically drained. 

 

“She’s out.” Seulgi’s fatigue face crinkle into a huge smile when she sees her girlfriend walking out of the classroom. Her heart turns in somersaults seeing that beautiful girl again. 

 

“There you go again. See you in class.” Jongin gives Seulgi a pat on the back and walks off to leave the lovebirds alone. 

 

Irene walks out with a dazzling smile, one that Seulgi has missed seeing. Her long silky hair flips in slow motion, as she turns behind to face someone she is talking animatedly to. 

 

Who is Irene talking so happily to? 

 

That is when Seulgi hears another familiar voice, and she sees the person’s face before she recognises it. He is spotting the same huge grin as his eyes focused solely on Irene’s. 

 

An unsettled feeling douses all the excitement she had in her mind. Seulgi walks towards them without a word to find out more. 

 

“Your notes really helped me a lot, Bogum. Thank you so much. I couldn’t have done it without you.” She informs him with a smile. 

 

“You are welcome. Let me know if you need any help. Shall we study together again this Sunday?”

 

“Sure.”

 

“Alright. I’ll pick you up and we can go to the library. Eh, Seulgi?” Bogum exclaims in surprise. Irene also gasps when she sees the long awaited person standing right before her eyes. 

 

“Seulgi?” Irene marvels at the sight before her. In just two weeks, Seulgi has changed a little. Her jawline has gotten sharper, making her features pop out even more. The captain now look so handsome that it sets off butterflies in her stomach when Seulgi looks at her. 

 

“Yea its me. Surprise.” Seulgi replies, a little unenthusiastically. 

 

Irene still cannot believe her eyes. “Wait...” She reached out to touch Seulgi and when she feels that it is really her, Irene has never felt happier. She marvels, “Babe...W-Why are you here? I thought you had class.”

 

“It ended early so I came here to find you. I seem to be interrupting something important huh?” She sulks.