Chanyeol called Baekhyun’s family after he got a chance to, and he talked to Baekhyun’s mother.  The hospital paramedics were still working on Baekhyun then.  He was being given powerful medication by IV, they had sedated him, and they were giving him two units of blood.  He was not out of the woods yet, by any means.  He had regained consciousness once, briefly, but the last time Chanyeol had seen him, he was unconscious again. 

           Baekhyun’s family was very thankful for what Chanyeol did, and Chanyeol insisted to stay at the hospital, helping Baekhyun’s parent to take care of the boy.  At first Baekhyun’s parents were reluctant, yet since Chanyeol was very persistent, they allowed the young man to stay by Baekhyun’s side. 

           Suho called to Baekhyun’s number that evening.  They had exchanged their numbers to update each other with their beings, and how surprised Suho was, to learn that it was Chanyeol who received his call, and he was even more shocked, to get the news that Baekhyun had been hospitalized in a sudden.

           “What exactly do they say is wrong with him?”  Suho sounded desperately worried as he listened to Chanyeol, and the boy sounded sober and scared beyond belief.

           “He has an ulcer apparently.  They think the bleeding has stopped now.  But if I hadn’t gotten him here fast as we did, he could have died.”  Chanyeol swallowed, his voice hoarse.  He could not imagine if he were too late.

“I know,” Suho said quietly.  “Thank God you did.”

           “Thank you for calling.”  Chanyeol muttered, though to be honest he did not really know well who Suho was, but he remembered Baekhyun mentioning about the man once or twice.  That Suho was a friend of Sehun in his workplace.  “I appreciate your attention for Baekhyun-ssi.”  He said, sounding drained.  “I’ll call and let you know how things are.”

           “Call me anytime.”  Oddly, Chanyeol could almost see Suho smiling dimly at the other line.  “You take care of yourself as well.  Get yourself enough food and rest.  Baekhyun would not want to wake up and see you sick because of him.  Don’t hesitate to call me if you need my help, I’ll grab the phone as soon as it rings.  Sehun’s friends are my friends as well.”

           “Thank you.”  Chanyeol said again, before they ended the call.  He went back to Baekhyun.  The nurse told him that Baekhyun was sedated and would sleep for hours, and they offered him a bed in the waiting room, for the night. 

           Chanyeol did not want to leave Baekhyun alone in the hospital, and seemed grateful to be able to stay.  And as soon as he lay down on the cot they had given him, he fell asleep.  He was exhausted from the strain of worrying about his best friend, and by then it was the middle of the night.

***

           Baekhyun was sleeping more peacefully by then, and he had not vomited again.  His blood pressure was slightly higher that it had been, he was getting much more normal, and the nurse came in every twenty minutes to check his vital signs, and they were satisfied that he was not about to die.

           A bit exaggerating, he thought.  But he knew it could not be helped, not after one saw the amount of fresh blood he managed to spill out.  He thought of Chanyeol now, and realized how bad his friend might feel when he had to witness all of that.  He made a mental note to apologize to Chanyeol later, once he could get out of this hospital.

           They left him alone in the room after the last check-up, and Baekhyun soon found himself drifting off to a deep sleep once again, and his sleep began to fill with complicated dreams.

           He was in the middle of nowhere, boundless by time and space, not even a horizon lining where he stood at.  It was only a mixture of blue and black fogs, garnished with several silver lights — yet Baekhyun found it was calming to be there.  Like he was in a serendipity and nothing could harm him, not even the misery that haunted him lately.

           A mesmerizing lightning attracted his attention, and he decided to search for where it came from.  He could not tell where the dream was leading him, but after a while, walking on a blurry path, suddenly he was aware that there was someone else walking by his side.

           His face turned to have a look. And there, he saw the very person whose existence he longed for the most.

His Sehun.

His beautiful Sehun.

           He was staring back at him, beaming brighter.  He seemed happy and at ease, and after a heartbeat, they stopped, motionless, only staring at each other.

           Baekhyun felt his heart pounding faster — as fast as his tears racing down from his brown eyes. 

“Hi, Hyung.”

           And more tears streaming down freely.  Uncontrollably.  He missed him.  Every pore of his being screaming that he missed his presence.  He missed embracing him, kissing him, or just simply holding his hands — yet none of them, he could do.

           Baekhyun blinked his tears away.  It was just the way Sehun had looked every night when he came home from Suho’s place after work, and Baekhyun had dinner waiting for him.

           “Hi,” Baekhyun swallowed.  “How— how’ve you been?”  It was hard for him to speak, but he knew he had to say something.  Anything.  Now that he was aware he had given a chance to be able to talk to Sehun in the dream — was it even a dream?  It felt so real — and he noticed how well and cheerful Sehun looked, and he was glad for it.  

           Baekhyun felt more awake than asleep, but he realized he had to be asleep if he was seeing Sehun.  And he knew very sure, he did not want the dream to end.  Not so soon.  Not forever. 

           “I’m fine, Hyung.”  His Sehun beamed.  “But,” slowly his smile was fading, “you’re not in such a great shape yourself.  What have you been doing to yourself?” 

           Baekhyun could see the worry in Sehun’s lovely eyes.  Sehun was wearing a clean light blue shirt, and jeans, and his favorite sneakers, and Baekhyun wondered how Sehun managed to take them with him.  He distinctly remembered, even in his dream, burying Sehun in a different pair of shoes, and Sehun was in a dark suit.  But the mystery of what Sehun was wearing seemed too deep to solve.  And another mystery was, how on the world Sehun could stay fashionable? 

           Wait.  Was this even important to think about at this particular time? 

           “I’m okay,” Baekhyun reassured him.  “I just missed you a lot.”  He had an odd sense that he was not actually saying anything, but talking to his Sehun in his head.  Yet he was not sure how.  Telepathy?  Since when their story becoming a science fiction one?

           “I know you miss me, Hyung,” Sehun said gently.  “But that’s not an excuse to fall apart.  You’re turning everyone sad because of you, and your health is a mess.”

           “I—“  Baekhyun paused.  Wait.  Did Sehun just scold him?  And since when this boy had the courage to advise him?  Baekhyun felt he wanted to pout.  A health advice from the same person who refused to take his medicine every time he caught cold was totally invalid.

           “You should try playing your online games again, just remember to play it wisely.  Though I’m sure you’d never be as good as I was, but it can help ease your mind.”

           Did he really have to listen to this?  Baekhyun squinted his eyes.  Not sure he should put the matter of who played better into a debate, because it surely looked ridiculous to fight over that issue...  now?

           “And why don’t you talk to your parents?”  Sehun said sensibly and smiled.  “They are sad to see you like this.  And the fact that you don’t sweep and mop your apartment since I’m gone.  But seriously, Hyung, since I’m not there anymore, you’re the one who’s responsible of the whole place’s cleanliness.”

           And...  again, said someone who always left the leftovers on the dining table until they smelled. 

           “Why don’t you talk to your family, too?”  Baekhyun attempted to see how Sehun’s brother and sister reacted when they heard Sehun’s words of wisdom.  He bet they would feel the same way as he did.

“They can’t hear me, Hyung.  You can.” 

           Baekhyun knew Sehun was right after all, because this was his dream, not anyone else’s.

           “And there’s nothing wrong with their life anyway.  They were grieving, too, but I could see they still try to move on.  Even with my mother.  Unlike you, Hyung.”

           One more time, Baekhyun felt he wanted to pinch Sehun’s cheek and pull it as far as he could.

           “You’ve got to get well now, Hyung.  You can’t do anything for anyone until you’re well.  You have to be healthy and go home and back to your lessons.”  

Baekhyun could hear Sehun’s voice with perfect clarity in the stillness in his head.

           “And I remember you haven’t done your project.  It’s overdue for too many days already.  You’re lucky to have me as your excuse, but I’m not sure you can still use the same excuse for a long time.”

           Okay....  this was far too real.  The way Sehun talked, his choice of words, his annoying behavior, every single thing was a perfect match.  This dream was too surreal.  Was this the result of the sedative he was taking in his blood?  He was surely getting afraid of the effect.

           “Get well soon, Hyung,” Sehun said, smilingly, “and go home.”

           “I don’t want to go home,” Baekhyun started to whine miserably.  He felt like he was going to start crying also in the dream.  “I hate being home without you now.  It makes me too sad.” 

           Sehun stood watching him for a long time, not sure what to say to Baekhyun, as the boy cried and blew his nose. 

           “I’m never going to get used to this,” Baekhyun said, trying for an explanation, as though it would make a difference now, that Sehun would or could change his mind, and come back if he talked sensibly to the boy — which was of course impossible.

           “Yes, you will,” Sehun said emphatically, “you’re very strong, Hyung.”  He sounded very firm.

           “No, I’m not,” Baekhyun sobbed.  “I can’t be strong on my own.  I need you.  I need you to be beside me, because you are my strength.  I don’t have anything left to give or live with.”

           “Yes, you do,” Sehun insisted.

           And then there was another sound in Baekhyun’s dream, like a voice trying to talk to him.  And it seemed it came from far far away, and he did not recognize it. Whose voice was that?

           Baekhyun fluttered his eyes open to see who it was.  The nurse?  And as she looked at him, his sense of Sehun talking to him disappeared.

           “You’re having mighty busy dreams tonight, aren’t you?”  The nurse said pleasantly, taking his blood pressure again, and looking pleased with what she observed.  Things definitely looking better for Baekhyun again.  Though for a while earlier today, it had been a close call.

           The nurse did not stay for long, right after she was done with her task, she went out and left Baekhyun all alone again.  Baekhyun closed his eyes and went to sleep once more, and as soon as he did, he found the dream. 

           It was comforting to find Sehun again as if Sehun was really waiting for him to come back to talk to him.  Sehun was sitting on a low wall, swinging his feet, as a little kid used to do.  And he hopped off the wall as soon as he saw Baekhyun again.  But when Baekhyun spoke to him, he did not like what he heard.

           “Sehun-ah, I want to come with you.”  Baekhyun had been wanting to say that to Sehun for a month now.  And now finally he could — in the dream.  It had been in the back of his mind for a while, but he had never actually formulated the words, or admitted it to himself. 

           He wanted to be with his Sehun.  He could not live without his Sehun anymore.

           “Are you out of your mind, Hyung?”  Sehun looked shocked.  “And leave your parents?  Your friends?  They need you too much.  I don’t make the decision around here, but I can tell you no one would buy that idea.  Forget it, Hyung.  Shape up.”  He sounded angry at Baekhyun.

           “I can’t do—  I can’t live my life without you.”  Baekhyun said unhappily.  “I don’t want to be here anymore.”

           “Listen up.  I don’t care.”  Sehun rasped.  “You still have your life.  You still have work to do, and so do I,” he said, sounding far more grown-up than he had when he left.

           “What kind of work are you talking about?”  Baekhyun asked him, sounding curious, yet Sehun shrugged.  He was back sitting on the wall again, swinging his feet.

           “I have no idea yet.  They haven’t told me yet.  Something tells me it’s going to be a big job, given your attitude and the shape you’re in.” 

Baekhyun frowned.  What’s that supposed to mean?

           “How can you be like this, Hyung?  You’ve never been a quitter before.”  Sehun sounded disappointed in him, and Baekhyun looked up into a familiar eyes and wished he could touch Sehun’s face, but something told him, he could not.  He knew instinctively if he did, he might wake up. 

“You’ve never been dead before.  I can’t take this.  I just cannot.” 

           Sehun chuckled.  Of course nobody had been experiencing death twice.  Death could only come once, and so did life.  He hopped off the wall again and stood looking at Baekhyun as the older boy said the words. 

           “I don’t want to hear you say that again.”  Sehun sounded like he was older than Baekhyun.  He seemed angry and very firm when he spoke.  “Behave yourself.”   Suddenly Sehun turned to be very grown-up.

           And even Baekhyun was aware that it was very unusual.  A very odd dream.  It had a strange feeling of reality to it, as though he were in a different world with Sehun.  Which was yes, they were.

            “Okay—“  Baekhyun felt like a small kid as Sehun scolded him.  “You don’t know how hard it is, being here without you.”  He had wanted to say that to Sehun for a month, and was relieved that he could now.

“I know.  I hated leaving so fast, so sudden.  It came as a surprise, even to me.”

“What happened anyway?”  How did—

           “I’m not sure either, Hyung.  It was all a blurry memory to me.  All I could remember that it was drizzling, the wind was blowing quite hard, a sound of a car honking—“  Sehun paused, his brows furrowed.  “That’s all.  The next thing I know, I was looking back at my own body laying at the side of the pavement.”

           Baekhyun winced.  Even after a month passed, it was still horrible to imagine what had happened. 

           “And poor Suho-Hyung.  I hate leaving him, too.  Nobody would help him at night shifts.” 

           Sehun looked worried as he thought of it, Baekhyun understood.  Suho was indeed a nice person, and he was very sad also when Sehun was gone.

           “He’s doing a little better now,” Baekhyun reassuring him, and Sehun nodded as though he knew more about it than Baekhyun did. 

“And you should learn from him, Hyung.” 

Baekhyun was about to open his mouth to object—

            “If you’d just do what you have to do to get over it, things might get better a little faster than they are.  You’re not making this any easier for me.”  Sehun grumbled, looking tired and very concerned.

            Baekhyun noticed that Sehun seemed to be fading a little as he talked to him, as though Sehun had stayed long enough and was worn out.

            “I’m sorry, Sehun-ah,” Baekhyun breathed, “I didn’t mean to let you down,” he said apologetically, hoping the dream was not going to end.  He had a strange sense that he was going to slip away and he was about to wake up. 

Wake up to the reality...

           “You never have let me down, Hyung.  And I know you won’t either now.”  Sehun smiled at him.  “Right now, just get well, and then we’ll talk about other stuffs.”

           Other stuffs?  “When?”  Did it mean he get to see Sehun again in the future?  In the dreams?  If it was true, he wanted to know when he would see him again.  He was afraid he would never have a dream like this again.  He had never had one ever since Sehun died.

Except for tonight.

            “I told you, when you get well.  Right now, I don’t want you to worry about anything.”

Baekhyun muted.

“And it’s morning soon, you better sleep well before you wake—“

“I don’t want to wake up.”

“Why not?”

           “Because I would not be able to see you, to talk to you. I could only see and talk to you in my dreams, so I don’t want to wake up from my dream.”

           Sehun laughed at Baekhyun’s words, and it was the laugh Baekhyun remembered so well, and the smile he had missed so much.  It felt so good to see his Sehun again, and made Baekhyun feel more than ever that he did not want to wake up.

“I think you’ll be seeing me a lot.”

           “What do you mean?  Does it mean I’ll be dreaming of you more?”  Baekhyun wanted answers from Sehun, and promises that he would see Sehun again in his dreams.  Tonight had been a gift from Sehun.  It was exactly like being with him.

“I think you are seeing me now.”  Sehun said comfortably.

“Of course I can see you now.  I’m still asleep—“

“That’s not what I mean.  You can see me now.”

Baekhyun lost his understanding. 

“Even if you open your eyes now.”

“Now?”

Sehun nodded. “Yeah. Now. Open your eyes.”

            “I’ve told you, I don’t want to open my eyes.  If I wake up now, you’ll be gone, and everything will be awful again.  I refuse to wake up.”  Baekhyun said stubbornly, and wanted to squeeze his eyes shut as tightly as he could.

            Sehun laughed.  “You’re acting ridiculous, Hyung.  Just wake up.  Open your eyes.”

            Baekhyun tried to resist at first, and then found that he could not.  Because Sehun seemed to be compelling him again and again to do as he said.  He should have known this, Sehun and his super power in nagging.  So after a few moments, Baekhyun’s eyes fluttered open, and he could not see clearly at first in the darkened room, but when his eyes adjusted, he could sight Sehun sitting at the end of his bed, looking just exactly as he had in his dream.

             “Wow, this is awesome.”  Baekhyun said, looking at Sehun with a grin.  “It must be the drugs.”  He was amused.  Maybe it was a hallucination after all, not a dream.

             “No, it’s not the drugs, Hyung,” Sehun said confidently.  “It’s just— me.”

             “What do you mean, it’s— you?”  Baekhyun was suddenly staring at him, and his eyes were wide open.  It did not make any sense to him.  It was no longer felt like a dream.  He was wide awake, he could see Sehun talking to him, which was completely weird.  It did not make any sense.

             “Just what I said, Hyung, it’s me.  This is pretty cool, Hyung, isn’t it?”  Sehun looked thrilled, and there, there was a look of panic in Baekhyun’s eyes as—  as— he saw his Sehun begin floating in the empty air, up and down, weightlessly.

“Too bad, I haven’t earned my wings.” Sehun smiled wider. 

Baekhyun frowned, feeling shock.

Had he been talking to —

A ghost? 

***

TO BE CONTINUED~

Author's Note:

Thank you so much for reading, subscribing, upvoting and leaving wonderful comments. I am so overwhelmed and excited! :D I'm sorry if I reply your comments a bit late sometimes, but I make sure I respond asap. Please stay with me for the next chapters, and please send me some comments if you're available, because it's always great to know your insights about the story. See you soon!