Artificial smoke. Flashing lights.  Her heart beating along with the thumping of the bass. Blaring music surrounded her and it comforted her enough to ignore the smell of sweat and alcohol that permeated the dance floor. The crowd was ecstatic, dancing senselessly to the music.  Some are too busy flirting to dance. Some too happy to flirt. Some too drunk to even care. 

Tiffany smiled to herself and thought if only she could have this all all over again.  

In the sea of lost strangers, Tiffany felt like herself, even just for a moment.

And then, she remembered.

--

Pushing through the plastic curtains, Tiffany stopped on her track and stared at the sea of bodies crowding the dance floor. She saw familiar faces and quickly looked away, afraid of getting their attention. Suddenly, being there made her feel small. Gathering herself, Tiffany gulped down the fear and got back to business. 

It's okay, Tiffany. This used to be your scene.

Self-consciously, she started bobbing her body to the music, eyes boldly scanning the dance floor until she saw that specific face in the crowd she was looking for.

Her heart skipped a beat when their eyes finally met.

Tiffany gave her a hesitant nod.

The girl answered it with a middle finger.

Tiffany gulped and hurriedly looked away.

Clearly, she didn't have any idea what she had gotten herself into.

--

"How's the party, darling?"

Cursing under her breath, Tiffany let go of the door behind her and straightened her body from her silly attempt to tiptoe her way inside their house. The door closed on its own with a thud. There's no point trying to be sneaky now.

Her mother gave her a worried look before folding her sleeve to look at the time. "You came home early tonight. Was it boring at the party? "

Immediately, Tiffany sported a sheepish smile, intentionally making her eyes smile to support her facade. "No. ma. It was fun. But I started feeling nauseous so I thought I'd call it a night. " She went to give her mother a hug. Expertly, she changed the subject, "How about you? Aren't you supposed to be at the airport by now?"

And immediately the expression on her mother's change from concerned to just tired. She always looked tired. 

"Flight's delayed by two hours. I was actually just about to leave when you came in. But how are you, darling? Are you feeling sick? Should I get you some soup and some medicine before I head out?" As if instinctively, she turned back to the kitchen but Tiffany stopped her. 

"I'm okay, ma. I can take care of myself." She nursed the most reassuring smile she could muster. 

Her mother, despite still worried and unsure, stopped and gave her wristwatch another look before sighing under her breath. "Okay, then. Well... I need to go." She went to pick up her luggage and slung her jacket on her arm. Tiffany crossed her arms against her chest, watching mother walk around the house to check if everything was in place before finally going to the door. As usual, a feeling of dread and urge to cling on her mother's feet filled Tiffany as she watched her mother head to the door. The door opened and Tiffany shivered. It's not even the breeze that did it; just the thought of being alone again always made her feel cold.

But she'd get used to it. 

Standing by the door, her mother gave her a warm hug before pulling away to look her in the eyes. Tiffany looked down instead, doing what to her is the most convincing indifferent expression she could. To avoid being caught. She knew how perceptive her mother could be when she really tried and Tiffany hated to be poked where it hurts.

"Are you sure, you'll be fine by staying here by yourself? They know you just moved to a new school, darling. I'm sure they would try to understand if I cancel on this one."

She grimaced, "You don't have to, ma. I told you. I'm fine. You make it sound like I'm a child. I'm basically an adult now. I can take care of myself." She could call herself a master in it now. Besides, she had always been frequently left at home to thrive by herself since she was 13. Financial matters aside, Tiffany was independent. At least, after her own definition of the word.

Her mother gave her an intent look; observing, before finally letting the topic go. "Okay, then." Adjusting the strap of her bag on her shoulder, her mother gave her a little smile, "I trust you. You can always invite Bora and Taeyeon over if you get lonely."

The names made Tiffany want to squirm. That reminded her she still hadn't talked with her mother about it.  She fought to control her expression, finger fiddling on the beads of the bracelet on her right hand. "Sure, ma."

"I left some money on top of the fridge. You girls can use that to buy whatever food you want." Her mother turned to leave before catching herself, suddenly remembering something. She added, "Now, I don't mind you, girls, drinking a little bit together but you have to do that in our place. The last thing I want is for something to happen to you while I'm away."

One look and Tiffany knew what her mother was talking about. There was one night when Tiffany got very wasted. Taeyeon had to drag her by the shoulders just to get her home. She made a very big mistake that night. Alcohol really s things up sometimes.

"Okay, ma. Don't worry. We won't do that."

Her mother gave her a nod before finally turning away.

"And ma? Thanks.... for the money, I mean." 

She could see the disappointment on her mother's face after she said that. Despite that, her mother managed a small smile. "No problem. That's what I'm here for." 

'No, it's not. You're more than just that to me,' Tiffany wanted to correct her. But the satisfaction of seeing someone else's night get ruined, just as much as hers did, stopped her from saying anything. 

Tiffany watched her go. Saw the lights of her car lighting the garage. The roaring of the car into life temporarily filled the silence, before her mother finally pulled the car away from the garage. 

And then Tiffany was alone again. 

The silence dragged but Tiffany couldn't make herself leave the doorway. She looked over her shoulder and checked the clock.

0200H

After trying to stop herself multiple times, she gave in finally and took her phone out. 

-Hi, Taetae. Are you awake? 😅

The screen told her the message had been seen. Tiffany stared at her phone screen nervously.

It took a few minutes before ellipses were shown on the screen and then Taeyeon finally replied.

- I am. Sup? 😊

- Ma's away. I'm ordering pizza. 🍕 🍕 🍕 😉

- I'm on my way. 🏍  😎

--

This always felt like home.

Tiffany in a breath when Taeyeon's mouth found the spot on her neck that always seemed to put her body on fire. She pulled her even closer and held her tighter.  She chased those beautiful lips with her own when Taeyeon pulled away to give them some space. She always hated it when Taeyeon did that. She gave her girlfriend's lips a bite as a punishment and smirked after hearing the moan that came out of Taeyeon's throat. Small but strong hands gripped on her hips and pushed her against the gated wall.

"That's foul, you sinful woman," Taeyeon growled under her breath which seemed to only ignite that fire that's already started on Tiffany's stomach even more. 

"Yeah? And what will you do about it? Give me a red flag?" she teased.

Taeyeon only held her eyes, gaze intense and yet playful. Pulling away, Tiffany stared at Taeyeon's swollen lips, watched the heaving of her breath whilst letting her fingers run on Taeyeon's disheveled hair. "Tackle me to the ground? Give me a piece of your ing mind?"

Tiffany smirked when Taeyeon gulped unconsciously. 

"Looks like I got that last one right."

 Laughing under her breath and shaking her head hopelessly, Taeyeon dipped again for another kiss before muttering against Tiffany's lip, smiling. "How about I give you more than that?"

Tiffany groaned when she felt the latter's hand slithering under her shirt, She braced her hands on the wall behind her to keep herself standing. Just the feeling of Taeyeon's skin on hers made her knees weak.

Now it's Taeyeon's turn to smirk. That damn little devil. She knew so well Tiffany was helpless against her.

"Now."

It was a demand. The satisfaction in Taeyeon's face said she understood but she still asked just to tease Tiffany more. Her face now only an inch away from Tiffany's "What do you mean now?"

"Give it to me now." Tiffany could barely get the words out, staring at Taeyeon's lips like a hungry lion.

"Okay." That smirk again.

Tiffany closed her eyes and waited for the lips that never came.

Instead, the salty and rough surface of a plastic folder met her lips.

"What the-"

Tiffany opened her eyes and almost screamed when she came eye to eye with the fish eyes printed on Jessica Jung's folder. Jessica said she had it customized just for her, so Tiffany should feel special.

Instead, she gave the girl a glare. "Jessi, what the hell??!" 

Jessica nonchalantly pulled the finger she stuck in her ear. She definitely expected Tiffany's loud shouting. Ignoring Tiffany's glare, she turned to Taeyeon who's grinning like a small child, clearly finding Jessica amusing. "Hi, Taeng."

"Hi, Sica, you're early."

"Duh," Jessica just rolled her eyes. "Don't sound so surprised. You know I got in trouble for being late yesterday." Jessica Jung, the girl known for her icy stare, porcelain-like skin, and stunning face that made her look like a walking greek statue, broke into a malicious smile, side-eyeing Tiffany. "Looks like someone else also came early today. Hi, Tiff."

That earned a laugh from the eavesdropping students, who happened to walk past them. Tiffany frowned. All she wanted was to punch that Cheshire-grin off Jessica's face. 

Taeyeon looked down embarrassed and let out an awkward cough. Tiffany, cheeks turning red, wished she could choke Jessica. "I hate you!" 

"Do I care?" 

She could hear even more laughter from behind them. 

Tiffany wanted to shrink and disappear then. This was usually what happens when Jessica hangs out with them, even back to when they were still at their old school. She attracts people's attention without trying. It always makes Tiffany feel smaller. 

Tiffany figured she probably looked too bothered by Jessica's childish act because Taeyeon noticed it and reached out for her hand. They both know Jessica was just joking. It's the way she was and had always been. Taeyeon thought Jessica was funny, and sometimes, even Tiffany did so. Despite that, Jessica's directness tick Tiffany off more times than necessary.

Trying to stop further damage, Taeyeon changed the topic, ignoring Tiffany's glare, "So, Fany and I are going on a hike on the weekends. Do you want to come?" 

Tiffany's eyes went wide. She opened to complain but the look she got from Taeyeon said she should keep shut. 

Jessica raised an eyebrow at Taeyeon's suggestion. "Why would you invite me? Ms. Loudmouth over there looks like this is not part of her plan. You know I hate to look like a party crasher."

Taeyeon denied it, sending Tiffany a look as if that would make Tiffany understand. "You're not crashing any party. We wanted you there. So, what do you say?"

Jessica looked at Taeyeon curiously, and like they finally made an unspoken understanding, nodded. "Okay then. I'll be late, though. I have things to do in the morning." Jessica explained more to Tiffany than to Taeyeon. She gave Taeyeon a knowing look and the girl smiled even wider in return.

"No worries. That sounds good enough for us." 

"Thanks, Taeng. To you, too Tiffany."

Taeyeon already answered before Tiffany could let out a word. "Anytime." 

"Well, I need to go. Donghae's probably already at the class, waiting for me. See you in History, Taeng." 

"Sure. And say hi to Donghae for me."

For a moment, there was something in Jessica's expression that looked off. Taeyeon clearly didn't see it but Tiffany did. Jessica cleared ; a nervous habit, and looked down to her bag, pretending to check on the contents of it. "Will do." 

When she looked up again, her composure was back.

"And don't worry about getting some on the weekend, Tiff. I'll take the couch." Jessica gave Tiffany a teasing smirk and winked.

--

"But Taeeee, we've been planning this trip for us for two months!"

"I know, but I don't like the idea of Jessica staying home for the weekends, Fany. At least not until club activities start next month," Taeyeon zipped her bag close, finally stopping to face Tiffany. "You know how her situation is."  Taeyeon almost hissed the last statement, giving their surroundings a cautious scan for any curious ears that might be tuned in on them.

No.Tiffany had an idea but she didn't really know. Jessica had always been just a friend of Taeyeon in Tiffany's eyes. She didn't like digging deep into other people's business, especially to the people in the likes of Jessica. She tolerated her because she's Taeyeon's friend and that was all. 

"But I've looked forward to this all month! And the cabin is my mom's. I get to decide who can come and who couldn't." Fany insisted, almost stubbornly so, crossing her arms on her chest like that would help convince Taeyeon to change her mind.

Taeyeon just looked at her as if she's a lost cause and then shook her head tiredly before taking her bag and heading to the door, walking fast and sure, leaving Tiffany to scamper to gather all her things to and run after her.  She was already a couple of meters away when Tiffany managed to get out of the room, "Hey! Wait for me, Taetae!" 

Taeyeon didn't so Tiffany hurried towards her, determined and unrelenting, ready to chase after Taeyeon until the girl finally gave in. Her adrenaline was already kicking in when suddenly  Taeyeon stopped on the corner of the hallway, her face losing a bit of color and maybe started looking a bit surprised. Curious Tiffany joined her slowly where she's standing and saw what made her girlfriend pause.

Bora. 

Taeyeon grabbed her hand as soon as she’s near enough to hold it. 

Tiffany only managed to get a glimpse of her and her snickering friends before Taeyeon pulled her away from there. 

--

There was a time when Tiffany was one of the cooler students. She followed fashion trends, liked by everyone, befriended almost everybody, attended the best parties, dated only the best looking guys, and had the world's sweetest and most caring best friend. Staring out the window, Tiffany watched as students flock into groups by the courtyard and wondered why she wasn't there with them, enjoying the lush greens, the vibrancy of the sun, and the refreshing breeze from the coming of spring. She should be out there making new friends. What happened to her?

"Hi!!! Your name is Tiffany, right?!" 

Tiffany almost jumped from surprise. She turned to the all too cheery voice behind her. 

"I'm Key," a guy with shaved eyebrows, blonde short-hair, and a bandana on the forehead, and "this is Seohyun," a timid girl, with a face half-covered by her own hair, were smiling at Tiffany in a way that made her want to run away.

"Uh.... Yes?" An awkward smile, "That's me. What is it?" 

--

"Okay, Taetae. Jessica can come with us  but in return, can you come with me tonight?" 

"Come where? And, what's happening tonight?"

"It's the school's welcome party for the new students. For us, basically. My new classmates asked me to join their group later. They seemed nice. In fact, I think you will like them! So.... Come with me, please? It will be fu-un," said Tiffany hopefully. 

"Who's coming with us again?"

"My classmates. Remember those kids from the theater club?"

"Fany, you don't like those classmates," Taeyeon deadpanned.

"But, everyone's coming! We're the only ones who are not! Come on, Tae. Come with me. Please, please, pleeeeeeeeeeeeaase," Tiffany wouldn't have a problem dragging the 'e' for hours if that means Taeyeon would come. "Besides, we never go out."

Taeyeon gave Jessica a knowing look, which the latter only shrugged at before Taeyeon turned apologetically to Tiffany. "I'm sorry, babe. Not this Friday night. Jessica and I will watch a documentary together. It's research for the article we're writing. "

"But the newspaper club isn't even officially open yet! Come on, Taetae. Pleaseeeee." She gave Taeyeon the cutest puppy eyes could come up with and ignored the fact that Jessica was making barfing noises beside them.

Taeyeon just shook her head. "I'm really sorry, Fany. I know the club isn't open yet, but there's a schedule we need to follow. We really can't be behind again with this one. We'll do it next time, okay?"

It's settled. The decision was final. Tiffany heard it clearly on Taeyeon's voice.

Dejected, Tiffany took her bag and left. 

--

- Fany, can we talk? - Taeyeon

Rolling on her stomach, Tiffany reached for her phone. She stared on the text really hard before deleting it. She didn't have time for Taeyeon right now. She knew she would just end up getting more pissed. Taeyeon hated confrontation while Tiffany believed that it's a normal part of any kind of relationship. Their arguments almost always got resolved on a bed or Taeyeon would find a way to avoid talking about it until Tiffany ended up forgetting it. Talking, after its meaning in Tiffany's dictionary, never works when it comes to her and Taeyeon. 

Bored and hungry for diversion. Tiffany clicked on Instagram and scrolled lazily.

Watches-

Puppies-

Taeyeon's puppy-

Pasta-

Another pasta-

Kwon Yuri-

#WelcomeParty

Spring fashion capsules-

And Bora.

A picture of Bora and her friends on tonight's Welcome Party. They looked so happy in the picture. Tighter more than ever. United because of one natural enem-

- Are you pissed at Taeyeon because of me? - Jessi

A message from Jessica. It surprised Tiffany even when it's so very typical of Jessica to ask things like this out of the blue. 

- Yes. But obviously, you're not the only reason why. 😒 

- Great.

Told Taeyeon we're chatting. She's harassing me right now.

Can you guys, like... talk?

I don't like playing the messenger.

-🙄 Will Taeyeon ever realize you're the worst spy in the world? 😟 

- I'm still waiting for that day. I hate having to contact you.

- Ditto. 😛 😛 😛 

Tiffany bit on her lower lip waiting for Jessica to reply. She wasn't the best on it but it's better to talk with her than be left alone with her thoughts. She texted again when it felt like Jessica couldn't care less about replying. 

- Hey, about the cabin this weekend.

Sorry on how I reacted. I don't really mind... just... Taeyeon didn't tell me beforehand. Was a bit surprised, I guess.

We're okay, right?😇 😇 😇 😇 😇 😇

She wanted to mention Jessica's mom and why she understand it perfectly. But then, she remembered how Taeyeon warned her never to talk about it. 

All Tiffany received was a thumbs up on her last reply then Jessica logged off. Typical Jessica. Sighing, Tiffany closed her Messenger's tab and went back to stalking Bora's Instagram before finally going back to her feed. All the while she wondered, how in the world did she end up from going out every Friday night to this.

This boring person who stayed at home every Friday night, lurking on social media, blaming her girlfriend for everything that went wrong about her day.  

Scrolling along her feeds on Instagram further, Tiffany accidentally clicked on one of the posts then a song started playing. 

♪As you walk, maze that gets even more complex

Life is like that

(Sometimes) Is that okay?

(Keep tryin’) Don’t question it

(Rise) Encounter the unknown in front of your eyes

You are the one and only

There’s only you

Like you, every single day

Spread your dreams splendidly

Every moment, oh it’s beautiful

That’s LIFE, c’est la la vie

You are the one and only

There’s only you

Like you, every single day

Spread your dreams splendidly

Fill every moment with you

That’s LIFE

C'est Là la vie, c’est la la vie ♪

The song made something in Tiffany click. 

When did one failure ever enough to make Tiffany give up?

Hurriedly changing into her party clothes and putting on some make-up, she twirled in front of the mirror for one final check before strutting out the door. 

Tiffany Hwang is back. 

AN: The song is called C'est La Vie by SNSD's Kwon Yuri. You know what I did there, folks.  ;D