[Without You by G-DRAGON ft ROSÉ : Chorus & Verse 3] 

Normally, and that's like 2 years ago, staring right straight to those slightly brown and intense eyes could bring so much emotions in her. Emotions that only Jennie could somehow manage to pull off and those are happiness with a hint of playfulness and shyness that had traverse through the lenses of those cameras coming from either their fans, their own staffs, their own members and the media but now it's different. Staring at it causes pain, an agonising pain. 

Back in the past, her heart would soar up high whenever their eyes meet, you can call it whipped because that's what she was. Her heart would always go wild whenever the woman is around, it would pump so much blood that it triggers her senses to get so giddy and excited to be with her — is that scientifically proven? She had no idea but she can be a philosopher of her own life and emotion, can't she? Her young and fragile heart that seeked love and affection was brutally wounded that it stayed dripping for months before she forced to heal it. 

Jennie's voice used to be a lullaby, a wonderful symphony that relaxes her and at the same time excites her, it used to have such a warm feeling she couldn't somehow pin point what. That's how mysterious Jennie is for her because no matter how long they've known each other, Jennie still surprises her however — her life has full of however don't you think? — just like what happened to the way Jennie treated her after she'd confessed, the warmth and the symphony were replaced with coldness and dissonance.

It crushed her heart into a million pieces, she didn't even know where to start fixing herself because in all honesty, how can you fix something that is already beyond repair? Maybe you could but it will never be the same anymore.

Lisa ruined them, she ruined the friendship they've built for almost a decade all because that emotion called love. What is love anyway? Is it ruining and crushing yourself because you can't have it? Is it feeling sad and lonely because you were just being honest towards the other party and to yourself? If it is, love is then a feeling that has full of bull.

They used to be inseparable but now they've grown apart that it's hard to turn things back to normal. How long has it been since they even had a decent talk? Had a one on one talk? Had an alone time together? A year? Two years? Most probably 2 years. It's been so long because Lisa just can't pretend anymore. Pretending to have not love or hurting while hanging around with Jennie is tiring and very painful.

Despite all of that, she still finds Jennie the most beautiful person she'd laid her eyes on. Every imperfection is what makes her perfect. After all these years of hurting and avoidance, she still loves her. How pathetic, seriously. 

Just like right now with their eyes locked against each other, her beauty shines so much that it's getting really painful if she keeps doing so. She doesn't know how long has it been since the last time she'd exhaled but she knows it's already long overdue because she's already getting so dizzy.

Jennie eyes are the portals of her emotions. If you'd look at it closely, her eyes translate everything she can't express in words and actions but right now, Lisa couldn't somehow interpret what's in it and she's too tired and drained to even try deciphering it.

Her music stops playing. 

"Jennie?"

"Yes, unnie?" she keeps staring at her.

"Why are you stuck there and what are you looking at?"

Lisa. 

Lisa chants it towards herself while trying to keep it in Jennie's voice, it's been already too long since the last time. Her name was so beautiful to hear when it rolled out of Jennie's mouth and of course, Lisa is once again living in the past. She knows Jennie is not going to say her name when cameras are not rolling as if it's a word that could burn her entire being if she does so, it hurt her but she got used to it. 2 years worth of getting used to does wonders. 

So she pushes herself so she could stand up and breaks their eye contact. She removes her earbuds and walks passed by Jennie without sparing her a glance, like she always does. It's better to act first than to get hurt again because she waited.

"Me." she says as she meets Jisoo and Rosé in the living room. 

"Wha- since when did you arrive? We asked the ahjumma down stairs and she said she did not saw you at all."

"Long enough for her to forget it." she says with a small smile and pats Jisoo's head as she