Nayun took me to her convertible car and drive away. The wind playing with my hair freely is actually a mood right now.

 

We stop infront of the sea, taking out the beers we slip on the way.

"How did you know?" I ask her. Nayun just keep her gaze at the dark sea.

"I thought you already know I like you?"

Now that didn't answer my question right?

"I've been liking you since you transfer, Nancy... but you didn't seem to notice me so I watch and admire you from afar." Huh, really?

 

"I know you love Yeonwoo. I can see it by the way you look at her. Cause that's how I look at you secretly." I saw the side of her lips loop. It was a sad smile, I know.

 

"And I hope I'm not creeping you out but I actually saw you kissing her when she's drunk asleep."

What? That...that's.. wth!

"Like you are to her, I am always there for you too. This is actually the car who always rides you and a drunk Yeonwoo home. I guess you always thought I am a cab driver."

She chuckled. And I remembered I never really gave a fare before when Yeonwoo calls me because she's out at the bar, drunk. Oh gosh.

"And the person who get Yeonwoo out of trouble from teachers whenever she got involve in one because of you. Yup, Nancy. I'm in the student council." And the one taking all those blames. Nayun wants too add but decided not to.

 

 

Really? I am that focused on Yeonwoo? How come I didn't recognize her? Or thought about these things?

 

"And I guess you also didn't know that."

Then there's the sad smile again. Nayun, though  I just know her today, I am already at ease. I can relate.

 

Her confessions awhile ago don't really feel awkward at all.

 

I feel pity for her and maybe she feels the same way for me too.

"I really like you. And actually, there's alot of other who likes you. Yeonwoo, they were scared of her and she intimidates them."

Yeah right, Yeonwoo. I never really noticed anyone who likes me cause I know I will only like her.

"But I really, really like you."

I look at her and she look back at me. Her expression is so serene and her eyes so sincere. Why me? 

 

Then I wonder how is it possible that some people are born to give more love than they will ever get back in return.

Nayun and I, we're in our own shoes yet we share the same road to walk.

"Isn't it amusing? We want what we can't have." She started.

"We love those who hurt us and hurt the one who love us.Yup, ironic." And I continued.

She look at me and we both laugh.

Two lost people under the sky and pouring stars. It kinda feels good to know someone who understands, but I feel bad for Nayun.

 

"So that song earlier, you were lowkey singing that to me right?" She nods and I hit her playfully. 

A smile rests on our face as silence fill us again. 

Breaking the ice, Nayun sing a song softly.

I hope she breaks your heart.
I hope she makes you cry
I hope she lets you down and never treats you right.
I hope one day you see she's not the one you need.
'Cause I'll be there to love you when she tears your world apart

I hope she breaks your heart.

She stop singing and look at me now with a soft emotion in her face.

"That is actually the song I wanted to play for you. You know, wanna play the antagonist role sometimes."

She smiled at me. I already feel comfortable in her presence. How can I possibly ignore her before?

I was so busy with my feelings I didn't know someone was actually making me their priority while I am being treated as an option.

"That's savage."

"I know."

"And kinda cause that's actually what I'm feeling now."

"And sadly, I know too Nancy."

Silence and darkness plus brokenhearts. What a chaotic combination.

"Why didn't you told her you love her?" Nayun asks what probably the question by those in the same situation like me.

Why didn't I told her I love her?

"How can I possibly do that? When everytime I try, she always says how much she love her. Drunk and sober."

I look at the stars and let my feet play with the sand. I inhale a fair amount of air, just enough to make me brave.

"How about you? Why didn't you tell me?" I could've noticed her atleast if she did.

 

"Same answer."

 

We're so pathetic.

Maybe the shape of heart is not heart, maybe it is triangle. We always have that someone whom we love and somebody who love us.

I sigh.

 

"So what now?" I asked her and I know she's as lost as me too.

"I don't know."

"Can two people with a wrong timing ever get a second try?"

I look at her and she seems confuse.

"I mean, do you want to waste time with me? You see, we're both inked of love, broken but stitch together by pain."

I don't know if she's weirded by me or she's still confuse. When I try to open my mouth again, she speak.

 

"I know what you're saying, Nancy. But aren't you just broken to say these stuff?"

"Aren't you?" 

 

She thinks for awhile. The way her eyes travel at the line between the sky and the sea had me catching a breath of air, inhaling the thrill.

Were both broken, unintentionally. I loved a wrong person and I know it won't be easy forgetting Yeonwoo, she'll always have this place in my heart, but I want to give it a try with Nayun.

After all, love is not always about fighting for what you love. You have to appreciate those who love you too.

 

"You have no idea how happy I am hearing you saying these words." She look at me anxiously. She's cute when she's shy and nervous.

 

"But Nancy I don't want you to regret this decision later on. I will be the happiest but your happiness matters to me to-"

I grab her by her nape and planted a soft kiss in her lips. She blink her eyes thrice and I find it so adorable that I need to kiss her again. 

 

She pull away and we both gasp for air. Her eyes was still half closed and I smile putting my forehead against her.

"I know you'll make me happy."

She close the gap.

I was never comfortable with people the first time meeting them, but I easily give in to Nayun. And somehow I know, I know we can make it work.

 

Maybe tomorrow I will wake up and I will still have feelings for Yeonwoo. But I am willing, willing to write a new chapter with Nayun.

 Not just because I am broken and Nayun is my last ticket to sanity but rather because for the first time I feel loved. For the first time, I am not scared to try.

The pain of regret outweighs the fear to try.

Afterall.. in the end, we all become stories!

 

And I've come face to face with this conclusion.

 

Nayun? She is the risk I never regret taking.

 

She makes me happy everyday. I feel so loved everyday.

Our friends (Yeonwoo's friends) are actually nice people.

 

Yeonwoo and I? We're fine.

And the thing is, our story now is not just about Nancy, Yeonwoo and Taeha. The me, you and her. 

 

Because finally now, there's mine. Me, you, her and mine. Nayun.

 

 

She's mine.

 

 

Everyone was circling in the bonfire. Since first quarter exams are over, we decided to reward ourselves and go camping.

 

Besides, it was also Nayun and I's one month of being together.

We're staying in a retreat house.

 

Jooe was telling a funny story of her in her elementary days. Everybody was listening and laughing at her. Jooe is seriously funny.

 

Nayun was hugging me from behind. She keeps on kissing my head every once in awhile, while whispering soft I love you's and 'how lucky she is for having me' in my ears.

 

Yup, she always make me giddy.

 

I am roasting marshmallows when I suddenly feel the need to pee.

 

"Let me go with you" Nayun enunciate.

"I'm fine. It would'nt take long. Roast this marshmallows for me, please."

 

She nods.

 

"Come back quick." I kiss her cheeks before making my way inside the house.

 

I got out from the cubicle when I saw Yeonwoo looking at herself in the mirror.

 

I stand beside her.

 

"What's up?"

 

She didn't respond so I look at her through the mirror. She was looking at me intently. Her expression was just like before, it's empty.

"Nancy.."

 

"Hmm.."

 

I see hesitation in her eyes.

 

"Can we talk?"