It's funny how I describe my relationship with Yeonwoo as fine when all I have from her is stolen glances and unintentional eyes meeting.

I stayed with Nayun, she was with Taeha. It became like that.

I thought it was okay, we are happy.

But why do we say it's okay when clearly it's not?



"Can we talk?"


Yeonwoo asserts.

She look at me nervously.

Maybe she's expecting I will say no. But she wants to talk.
And why would I deprive her that?

"I thought we don't talk anymore?" I kid.

She was supposed to laugh and I was supposed to say it like a joke.

But I guess it didn't work that way.

I look at her.


"You stopped talking to me."


I know it was all so fast.

The night I finally confessed to her is also the night I commit with Nayun.


I thought she'll be happy. She don't want me, right? But why did she have to stop talking to me?


"Why talk now?"

"It's not like that-"

"Then what?!"

She's now looking at the floor as she let a deep breath escape .

"It's not that I don't want to talk to you."

Then she slowly averted her gaze from the floor to me. Her lips smile but her eyes doesn't.


"It's just that everything I want to say, I can't tell you anymore."


Yeonwoo is good with hiding and controlling her emotions. She is that someone you won't know what she truly feels unless you look at her eyes.

And as much as I want to know what she feels, I am confused on what she's trying to imply.

Or more like denying what she means. I don't want to expect anything.

I've come to learn that most people create their own heartbreak through expectations. I want to avoid going down that road.

I remain still, just looking at her. Trying to weigh what I should feel.

"Can we talk?"

She try again and again, why would I say no? I think this is not the right time to get confused, I smile at her and tried to lighten the ambiance.

"Sure. But can we go back first? They might be looking for us now. Taeha must be looking for you and Nayun must be worr-"

"No!"

"What?"

She avoided my eyes.


"I-i mean, I want to talk to you alone, Nancy."


Then she look at me straight in the eyes, Yeonwoo is beautiful but she's more beautiful when she's happy.

And I don't see a happy Yeonwoo right now.

"Here?"

She nods.

"O-okay? What is it you wanna talk about."

"I miss you." 

She trailed, voice cracking.

I sat on the sink to face and see her expression clearly. She was standing there beside me.


"Me too. I miss you"

And it's true.

Just because I am happy now with Nayun doesn't mean I stop longing for Yeonwoo.

I actually miss her more than I am supposed to miss her.


I waited for a few seconds to hear her next words but nothing come out from .

She just stand there, staring at me.

I used to stare at Yeonwoo. I can stare at her for a whole day and it will still be one of the best days in my life. I used to do that. And I used to melt in her stares too.



"Tell me what you want to say, Yeonwoo. Nayun surely is looking for me no-"

"Can you go back to the rooftop after every dismissals?"


She still stay there? But I thought she was happy with Taeha? Why is she still going to the place she goes to when she's sad?

Is she sad?

I look at her frowning.

"You know I can't do that, Nayun waits f-"

"Can you ing stop mentioning Nayun's name all the time!?"

I flinch when she hit the wall with her palms and shout at me.

Yeonwoo never shouts at me.

"You always mention her and it's damn annoying! So you base your decision on her now? You can't make your own choices now without Nayun? So it's Nayun this, Nayun that, Nayun whatever ?! Wtf, Nancy!"

I glare at her.

Nayun never force things on me. I do and choose things as I want, I just consider Nayun. How dare she judge my relationship with Nayun like that!

"I never interfere with you and Taeha. And so what if it's like that? Why the hell would you care?!"

I supported her with everything, why can't she do the same?


Yeonwoo seems to realize that she got into my nerves as her features became soft again and look at me apologetically.

"I-I'm sorr-y."


I can smell the alcohol in . Damn. I can't have a good talk with her when she's in this state.


"Let's talk when you're sober."

I retaliated and stand up to leave but she grab my wrist, close the door and pinned me in the wall. I hold at the hem of her shirt while she put her arms out, preventing me from escaping.

I try pushing her back but she's stronger

and tall.


"What's your problem, Yeonwoo?! Let go!"

I was still pushing her but to no avail. Everytime I push, she will just pull me closer to her and pin me more.


"You."

My heart crack along with her voice.

I stop fighting back and look at her eyes. The galaxy in her orbs where I used to let myself lost.


"You are my problem, Nancy."


Now I know she's sad.

Tears from those beautiful eyes are falling.



"Are you happy?"

"Nayun makes me happy."

I challenged her again by mentioning Nayun's name and I swear I saw her break.


"You love her?"

I nod.

This is making me sad too. Yeonwoo used to cry infront of me and it's a heartbreaking sight.


"I wish I can tell you that I am happy for you."

She softly caressed my cheeks.


"But I can't."

"I'm so sad Nancy, and I am so mad right now. I am so heartbroken" her lips quivered.

"I think I'm going crazy."

She trailed my lips with her thumb, I gulp.


"I don't like seeing you happy with her. It's hurting me."

She bites her lips. Her eyes never leaving mine.


"You're supposed to be mine."

She come closer. Now her body was pressing against mine.

"No, let me rephrase that."


"You are mine!"


Yeonwoo's breath was fanning my face. Her hands made it's way to my chin before she close her eyes, whispered I love you and planted a soft kiss in my lips.

Yeonwoo was kissing me.

It was my dream. It's my 11:11 wish.
But why? Why does it feels so wrong?

Her tears was wetting my face. Yeonwoo is crying while kissing me.


With the remaining sanity I have, I pushed her away.

She look at me guiltyly.

And now your guilty? Why would you feel guilty, Yeonwoo ? Why?


Because it was wrong.


"Nancy, are you there?"

We both heard Nayun's voice outside.

"Baby? What's taking you so long? Does your stomach hurts? Are you okay? "

My heart aches hearing Nayun's concern voice.

Nayun.

She's my unexpected blessing.


I look at Yeonwoo and harshly wipe my lips.


"No, I am not yours, Yeonwoo. Not anymore."


I finally said before opening the door and closing it again quickly so that Nayun won't see Yeonwoo inside.


Nayun welcome me in her warm embrace before checking my face. I snuggle at her.

"Are you okay? Anything hurts?"

I smiled. Nayun is the sweetest person I know.

Then suddenly I remember the kiss, I feel guilty.

I tiptoed and kiss her in the lips. Wishing it could erase Yeonwoo's kiss.

But sadly it didn't.

I pull away and hold Nayun's hand, intertwining it.


"I'm fine. Sorry if I worried you."

She smile at me. And I faded.

Afterawhile, Yeonwoo came back and she sit behind Taeha. She hug her from behind while looking directly at me. She smirks.

Now what was that for?

I sighed as I look around. Nayun excuse herself awhile ago and she still haven't came back.

My sight was blocked when somebody cover my eyes.



"Follow me, Nancy."

It was Jane. She motioned me to stand up and so I did.

My sight was blocked and Jane guide me to walk at wherever it is.

I can hear Jooe, Daisy and Ahin squels.

What's going on?

"We're here."

Jane slowly take the blindfold and I blink to adjust at the surrounding and wow.

My breath hitch.

The place was so bright with different lights. There are roses petals on the grass and not far from where I am standing, I see a table litted by candles.

Hyebin was there standing wearing a waitress uniform.

She smiled at me and I laugh at her. She's so cute, she look like one of those in the anime maids in her uniform.

I room my eyes around until I finally see the person I wanted to see.


"Happy monthsary, Nancy." She gave me a flower. Baby's breath.

I kiss her and hug her after. I am being emotional.

"Thank you so much, it is so beautiful Nayun."

"You're more beautiful and no, thank you Nancy. Thank you for giving us a chance."

I look at her.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Nayun kiss me. It was a long and sweet. I feel my heart beating erratically.


I heard claps and we both pulled away. Our friends was clapping and smiling at us, except Yeonwoo.

Yeonwoo.

"Shall we?"

I nod at Nayun.

We eat at the table provided for us while Hyebin served the food.

After eating, a mellow music was played and Nayun ask me to dance.

"It is so beautiful." I am still in awe. It is so surreal. Things like this only happen in fairytales and movies and here I am experiencing it.

Nayun is giving me my fairytale.


"Yeonwoo."

"Huh?"

"Yeonwoo planned this. She said it was you're dream date."

I buried my face at Nayun's shoulders.

I can't help but to tear.

Yeonwoo, she was actually listening to my pointless dreams.

And she's playing with my feelings.

We dance and afterawhile, our friends join us.

The dance is slowly becoming chaotic. What can you expect from Jooe and her funny dance though?

We're all laughing and dancing with Jooe, when I feel somebody holding my wrist. Before I can see who it was, I was being pulled.

"It's my turn."

She hug me and whisper in my ears.

"To love you"

"Nancy."