chapter twenty-four

I Remember You

At the end of February, Shinhye and I were in the 7-Eleven parking lot with hot chocolate on the brain when Shinhye put a hand on my arm. "Stop," she said. "We can't go in there."

"We can't?"

"I just saw Taejoon."

I could feel my eyes widening. If you can scream and whisper at the same time, that's what I did. "Here?"

Shinhye nodded.

"What is he doing here?"

"I have no idea." You should be able to guess, though, I thought. Ever since Las Vegas, he'd been calling a lot.

"Are you sure it was him?"

"Maybe?" Shinhye said.

We decided that since Taejoon had never met me, I'd go into the store and try to figure out if it was him. Shinhye said I could tell by looking at his left wrist. He wore a braided leather bracelet - she said he never took it off.

This 7-Eleven was pretty big. There was a circular counter in the center for the cashiers. Off to the left was the togo food - with counters for coffee and tea, the ICEE machines, shelves of sandwiches, yogurt, and drinks. On the right there were aisles of chips, magazines, pantyhose, replacement windshield wipers, and a gallon jugs of washer fluid.

I felt like a spy as I noted a dark head of hair in the mayonnaise, cereal, and dish soap aisle.

But the man reading the ingredients on a box of Honey Nut Cheerios was way old. He was wearing a suit with the tie loosened. He could have been forty. Or sixty. It was hard to tell.

"Can I help you?" he said when he caught me staring.

"Um . . ." I turned in embarrassment. But then I spotted another dark head of hair, clear across from the store by the coffee. Trying not to appear to be hurrying, I made my way over to the donut case and pretended to study the options, every now and then sneaking a look at the guy busy reading the tea bags and then putting them back.

That had to be him. He looked rich and young. He had thick eyebrows and conservatively cut black hair shot through with highlights. A strong jaw. Broad shoulders, but not as broad as Jin's. Everything he was wearing looked like it had just been washed and ironed.

And the tea drinking confirmed it. I mean, a guy our age drinking tea is weird, right? And so was Taejoon. That had to be him.

But when he reached with his left hand for a cup from the dispenser, the cuff of his shirt pulled away from his wrist: no bracelet.

Shinhye had said left wrist, hadn't she? I turned from the donut case, walked past the checkout and through the double doors, and rounded the corner of the building, calling out "Which wrist did you say?" before I realized that Shinhye was not alone. Standing close to her - way too close - was yet another male figure with dark hair. Compared to the cut guy inside, this new version of what it took my brain a full minute to understand was the real Taejoon was a mess.

He looked to have a few days' growth of beard, and he was wearing a thin gray sweatshirt that hung off his shoulders like it hadn't been washed recently. His dark hair was shaggy in the back and long over his ears. But because he was leaning against the open door of his car, one elbow cocked, the loose fabric of his sleeve had slid down and exposed his wrist. His left wrist. Where I could see a braided leather bracelet, plain as day.

"Are you Suzy?" he asked, and smiled in a way that was a little sad and a little scary at the same time. There was something about his eyes that made me wonder how long it had been since he'd slept.

Shinhye looked at me and shook her head slightly to let me know that I shouldn't answer his question, presumably because she had this under control. "What are you doing here, Taejoon?" she said, her jaw tight, her arms folded over her chest.

Taejoon blinked hard, but he didn't shift his gaze. He was still looking at me like he was hoping he could read something in my surprise, get access to information that Shinhye wasn't giving up.

"Well?" Shinhye said, stepping between us. Finally. Taejoon met her gaze.

"I just want to talk to you," he said. "You aren't answering my letters, texts, calls. Did Las Vegas mean nothing to you? How can you not want to see me again? I thought maybe if I drove to your house -"

"My house?" Shinhye said. "You mean the one where my parents live? My dad will call the cops on you."

"You could introduce me," Taejoon said. "I mean, I'm not a bad guy. He might like me."

"Taejoon, you aren't my boyfriend." I could hear the frustration starting to crack through Shinhye's calm. "I'm not going to introduce you to my parents. I'm not going to talk nor text you. It's over."

"No," Taejoon siad. "In Las Vegas, see -"

"I do see," Shinhye said. "I see that you're acting crazy. You have to stop texting and calling me."

Her words were harsh, but maybe they were what he needed, because suddenly, Taejoon was standing up straighter. he tucked his chin like he was literally swallowing her words. "I guess I should go," he said.

Shinhye nodded. She didn't relax her jaw. She uncrossed her arms only to put her hands on her hips. As she did, her half-zipped hoodie shifted slightly. At her neck I could see the glint of a gold chain. She was wearing Taejoon's necklace.

I saw Taejoon notice it only a half second after I did. This was bad.

"You want me to go?" he said, smirking now. "It's what you really want?" Later, Shinhye swore she hadn't heard any kind of smirk in Taejoon's tone. After all, she pointed out, he probably say only the chain. Without the diamond, how could he be sure?

But he knew. I'd seen it in his eyes.

"I do want you to go," Shinhye said. "It's what I really want." So Taejoon got into his car and with a roar of the engine backed out of the parking lot and zoomed off down the street. Shinhye and I jogged back to the school.

I didn't tell her how scary I thought this whole situation was getting, because I didn't want to open the door tot hat kind of conversation. I didn't want to hear how afraid she was for me. But later that night, I found myself teasing out an understanding of what exactly had gone down. I was worrying. Like Eomma must have been worrying about me.

Here's what else worried me: something about Taejoon's gaunt face, his desperate attempt to hold on to Shinhye, reminded me of Jin.

In the locker room after jogging, Shinhye had thrown her running shows into her locker in frustration, saying, "Why can't he see that it's never going to happen? Why do people insist on forcing the impossible?"

I could have answered her, but I didn't. I could have explained that until she fell in love she would never know that people in love almost always try to force the impossible. They cannot imagine letting go of what they have. Or what they wish they had.

Like Taejoon, like Jin, like me, like Jaehwan - none of us could imagine changing the way we felt. And yet Jin had told me that for him and me, that's exactly what would happen. We would separate. He would enlist. I would go to law school and have a good life.

It seemed impossible. I couldn't accept that that version of the future could be real.

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arnicutie #1
Chapter 30: Please make it a happy ending just like your other stories..
arnicutie #2
Chapter 17: I like it so much! Please do more jinzy stories..
Baek-me-a-Kookie
#3
Chapter 2: I don't know if you're aware, but this story has been uploaded to a copycat site, without giving you credit. It's happened to me and a friend of mine too, and many other hardworking authors.
fireworks95
#4
Chapter 14: It took me an hour to read all the chapters. Some of the parts were too precious i keep on reading them again and again. But then suddenly Jin is breaking up with her? Though I could make a guess through his weird action and constant headache.. is it because he starts to dream again? That he could see the future again? I'm scared for him.. he must feel miserable and alone on the inside. Wish someone could help and be there for him.. pushing Suzy away is not a good choice. He needs someone.. and now I'm left hanging T.T thanks for an amazing story once again. Can't wait for the next chapter~
fireworks95
#5
Wait what!? I'm so late not to know that you already upload a new story! This is going to be good like the rest of your story T.T I'm going to catch up later. So exciteddddd
MissSpring #6
Chapter 7: Omg! They kissed! Hewhew. I'm waiting for the next update!
MissSpring #7
Chapter 6: Omg!! What is it that he want? What is it??! I need more TT hewhew