The ceiling still doesn't give him answers no matter how long he stare at it but somehow manages to fill his bladder. He slides off the bed and exits the bedroom, only to be standing at the hallway with head looking toward the living room.

He had gone blank, it seemed, the moment his eyes met with Joonmyeon's black ones, that he found the student had fallen asleep with his own arm supporting his head at the other end of the couch when he finally uttered his plea. The feeling of disappointment was bigger than the relief and he could only switch off the television and covered Joonmyeon with a blanket before retreating to his room.

He brushes off the few strands of hair that have fallen on the small forehead as slowly leaning back against the coffee table. It wasn't sure when Joonmyeon dragged August out of the classroom and it could be when Joonmyeon accepted to have dinner with him and it was comfirmed when his heart broken at Joonmyeon's still unknown wherebaouts on the the third day.

It was assurance and worry mixed together when Joonmyeon didn't push him away from his hug earlier. Being the person Joonmyeon goes to after his disappearance tells him that he trust him, that he is safe with him and that he is a place he could return to, and that means a lot to him.

That was why he called Minseok, agreeing to tell what he can when the Math teacher doesn't mind his request of staying at his place for the night. He wanted Joonmyeon to keep thinking about him like that because if they stayed together tonight, he might do something that he wouldn't be proud of and worst, something that make Joonmyeon won't even spare a glance at him anymore.

But the small body looked so fragile that Yifan's heart might be the one breaking instead if he leave him alone in the middle of the night. It will break though, when Joonmyeon leave him tomorrow but he hopes it won't be that bad since he get to be with him like this.

"Stop," the horse voice entering Yifan's ears as the pair of eyes fluttering softly before they look tiredly at him.

'Being creepy and go to sleep?' He smiles. "I will."

The small pair of eyes are staring straight into his own as if trying to figure out what Yifan is thinking. "I won't."

'Leave in the middle of the night and we will never see each other ever again?' He nods. "Just making sure."

A sigh comes out from the small mouth as the tired eyes slowly close and he chuckles. Joonmyeon had gathered all his strength to shoo him to bed and he has no other choice than to follow. He pulls himself up on his feet, eyes never left the student before he leans down, burying his nose on the black locks and kisses it.

Vanilla.

-----

"I can go by my own!"

"Are you sure?"

Sophia is nodding eagerly and Joonmyeon just has to agree. Yifan watches the girl patting her new purse where she put the money Joonmyeon had gave before running towards the direction of the concession stands. "She will be fine." The comment earns him a glare, a tired one, and he just shrugs, leaning his back against the bench.

He stares at the clear sky that is slowly revealing its orange color. He had pushed himself to follow Joonmyeon even thought he clearly object it when the student went to meet Sophia and couldn't help smirking when Sophia was thrilled to see him as well as she with Joonmyeon. He himself hasn't been to an amusement park for a long time and was glad Sophia is still a little kid because that roller coaster does look scary.

She was alone, when they arrived, and it looked like it was for a couple of days too. Joonmyeon had told him there are people with similar status as Sophia and her mother living on the abandoned neighborhood and they were the one who helped her before she and Joonmyeon met.

Without them, the cut on Sophia's arm could have been worst. Yifan almost freaked out when he saw the tiny arm in bandages but Joonmyeon stopped him before he could say anything. He just followed from behind as his student led Sophia to a pharmacy that didn't look like it was their first time there.

He was afraid of disappointments. The look on Sophia's face if he had come there without Joonmyeon and the sinking feeling of his heart if Joonmyeon still hasn't visit her. And he might have scared her too by making a fuss about her injury when it was nothing to her, which it shouldn't be to such a small kid like her.

"Don't go," Yifan utters under his breath as he looks at Joonmyeon. It's almost a whisper and he doesn't know it was unintentionally or not but his student still hears it as their eyes meet with the straightest stare.

"I don't know how to take care of little kids like Sophia. I can't do a decent job even with you that can take care of yourself. We might die from some unknown reason if you left us to take care of each other. Please. Stay."

He doesn't know how desparate he sounded but it doesn't work. Joonmyeon is still staring deep into his eyes before he leans closer, putting his arms around Yifan's neck and breathes out into his shoulder, "Thank you."

Sophia's voice can be heard from a distance and he is being let go, feelings jumble around inside his body as he watches Sophia feeding Joonmyeon her ice-cream. Being torn like this. Better he didn't come with. Better he threw away his feeling. Better he didn't stalk his own student. Better he accepted that other school.

"Teacher, ah~"

Yifan blinks, before opening his mouth and letting Sophia feed him, earning a beautiful smile right after.

Those would be awful.

-----

"Take care of yourself too, okay?"

A smile finds its own way on to his lips while his hands open the door as he remembers Sophia's words. Joonmyeon seemed to have told her about his leaving and that Yifan won't visit her anymore. It is better like this since he isn't staying long. He will move to another school after he has finished here anyway.

He closes the front door and goes straight into the kitchen to put away the groceries he bought. It was something that need to be done since he only left with one egg in the fridge and zero instant noodle in the cabinet but also an excuse to leave Sophia and Joonmyeon together.

How is the little girl is stronger than him in dealing with goodbyes, he will never know. The hug he received after those words was so soft and warm, tugging his heart but he know it would make everything difficult if he cried then. He could only smile when Sophia kissed his cheek, saying her last goodbye before going to Joonmyeon.

Joonmyeon.

He was done for that very moment he acknowledged that anyone could develop the same feeling he is having so why wasting his time denying it. It is not like he dismissing the fact that a relationship between a student and a teacher is prohibited but Joonmyeon won't be his student forever and it is impossible for other people to know after he transfer to another school.

He has accepted his feeling but it was so sudden that he forgot it might not be a real one after all. He might just have a crush on his student. Joonmyeon is unpredictable and that intrigued him, making him following him around claiming his action is just that a teacher taking care of his student as an excuse to stalk him. He already lucky that Joonmyeon didn't report him to the police.

A crush will go away eventually and he just have to wait. He is totally not consoling himself from the fact that Joonmyeon rejected him. It is the truth as he nods to himself while walking to the front door at the sound of the doorbell. But apparently fate doesn't like its work being mock of as the sight of his student holding a knife and covered in blood greets him.

"Sophia..."