Now it’s spring. Trees put on their pretty green coats again. Sun shines and the air is full of the scent of flowers. Birds sing again and the wind comes happy children voices from the near playground through the opened window. I' m looking at the specks of dust that swim in sunbeams, we, people are just like them. Sitting on the shelves we wait for somebody to run over his/her fingers on us and make us fly. Just like bonbons waiting that special person who really wants to know us without our wrapper and hopefully loves us.

                When I talked to Youngmin hyung about my ”bonbon theory” he said: „I like sweet things so you must be milk chocolate...because I love you too much.” He my lips. „Yes...now I’m sure you’re the sweetest of all. I get you.” He is that person I have waited for.

            It’s sad that we have to hide our relationships and pretend we are still only a simple hyung and dongsaeng, but it’s okay as long as I’m with Youngmin. Now I know how hard to keep this secret. I’m such a person who loves physical contact, touching, hugging and kissing too. You know I grew up in a family that was a little repressed. No one argued, in front of anyone else, there was hugging, kissing and lap sitting, but how can I say it.....it just wasn’t enough for me. We are not all the same. I always needed more hugs than my twin. He didn’t like physical contact as much as me. I am sure he hated when I cuddled up to him. I always felt something lacking, and loved other kids’ homes where people shouted and ran and hugged a lot. I loved movies about those kinds of people. So I grew up to be a boy who really wanted affection and touch.

             Now it’s natural that I would like to touch my boyfriend, hold his hand and hug him, but I know I can’t do them in public, because cameras are everywhere. Despite fans love fanservice (bromance moments) but I don’t know how would they react if we announced our homoual relationship.

                Maybe because of that I also became a little introverted and love being at home where I can freely cuddle up to Youngmin hyung while watching movies. He really spends a lot of time with me now. When I read a book, he would sit next to me and play games on his phone. Once he said he didn’t like touching people, now I know he lied because he also loves to hugging and kissing me. He even sticks on me in his dreams. So you can see both of us changed. Thanks to me Youngmin hyung became more sociable and I became calmer because of him.

             Nevertheless now everything is perfect between us, I still don’t know that he is the hero of my whole story or just a special character of one chapter. But there’s one thing I’ m already sure that it’s the best chapter till now and I hope it will last long and if it’s not then I will never forget and I will always remember it as the first step of a wonderful travel.

           „What are you thinking about? You are smiling like you won the jackpot.” Speak of the devil. Hyung peeps into my room. „Well....something similar....I’m just thinking about how pretty you are.” I say and give a peck on his lips. He puts his large palm on my forehead. „Again.....Did you get a sunstroke again?” he asks me. „Nooooo...” I whine, hugging his waist. „I have already told you. It’s the truth.....you are.....yeppo.” I say giving a little aegyo. „I am not beautiful...Don’t forget I am a man....Look! I have stubble.” He rubs his chin. „Being beautiful is not only about the appearance.” You are a beautiful person, because your soul is pure. I cuddle up to him tightly just like a lost puppy to his beloved owner. My nose brushes against his neck. „Well I don’t know what happened to you....but anyway... you are so pretty outside and inside too.” I hear what he says but at this point I can only focus the warmth of his body and his sweet scent that turns me on. „You know if you are such longing, I can’t resist you.” He tilts my head and my neck with his lips. „How much time do we have until the dance practice?” he asks suddenly. I jump into his arms. „It’s quite enough.” I whisper into his ear. He kisses me passionately while walking with me to my desk and makes me sit there. „Wait.....wait.....my lyrics....” I beg. „What...?” he breathes. „Nothing...” I reply short and hide the papers into the drawer. „What’s that?” He blinks at me. „ In time you will know it.....Where did we stop?....Ah...I know.....” I say pulling him close until our lips meet. „Here.” The rest of the story you can imagine ;)

You look beautiful

It wasn’t that I liked you from the start,
I gradually started to like you.
You who’s like a friend, no, like family
You look pretty.
Being stuck together every day,
Watching movies, going around together
Practicing together, eating, and even going out to play
You, who holds my hand when I’m upset,
Looks into my eyes, and comforts me
You look pretty, really pretty
Are we unable to be more than friends?
You look too pretty, look pretty
I must really be crazy
Worring that we might become awkward
But you look too pretty, look pretty,
I must really be crazy.

To my most beloved hyung, Lim Youngmin. Let’ stick together a long, long time❣

Kim Donghyun

Happy Ending ;)

Bonus pics

Lyrics translation credit: @woojinprk