hello everyone.

i know this is very spontaneous and out of nowhere but I do log in occasionally with the recent events, I wasn't able to cope being anywhere near to anything that reminded me of her. It was just too painful. When you grow up as a lonely and introverted kid in your very young teen years and followed an idol as your strength, happiness, key to smile and laugh with, and as your own personal friend even if you never really actually met her in person, it's hard to suddenly lose that key of sunshine in your life. Sulli was and always will be a big part of me. She's a reminder of my childhood, my choices, and my ideas. She inspired me to do so many things and believe things based on what she taught me, she will always be a role model to me.

With that being said, it's been really hard. I couldn't afford to be anywhere near to her since it was just so hard to accept... it's still not something that has completely gone into my head. There are days that I am totally fine and smile and laugh to her older videos. But there are days that I can't afford to see anything with her without feeling horrible or on the verge of crying. 
 

I decided to log in today and saw a recent update by a fellow minsul author, foreveralwaysKV. Their update along with the comments of some of you guys made me smile and really opened my mind a bit about things. Like one of you said, us writing keeps her legacy alive and memories of her going. We wrote about her for a