Requested by: Darkday

“But Nayeon...”

”I said no, Chaeyoung. No means no. This will never work. We’re so far from each other and we can't be there for each other.”

”I..I need you Nabongs...please...”

”Chaeyoung, I said no. We must end this. This is ridiculous. Stop acting like you love me. Stop being such a baby and grow up! You can’t even take care of yourself! I told you to eat medicine but you won’t! I can’t bear being in a relationship knowing that you’re sick like this. I can’t, Chaeyoung.”

”Nay-“

With a big deep sigh, Chaeyoung had know that Nayeon already hung up. She tucked her phone inside her pocket and continued to study.

Chaeyoung was born with low immune body system. She fell sick very often and is not very fond of eating either. And because of this, every month she has to see the doctor at the hospital for checkup. 

Chaeyoung got together with Nayeon online, since two years ago. Chaeyoung was attracted to Nayeon through their online game chatroom. So she tried her best shot.

Since Chaeyoung is in college now, she’s living in a dormitory with some friends. But her roomate moved out so she lives alone now in her room.

These past few days Nayeon kept telling that their relationship won’t work. She kept denying whenever Chaeyoung said I love you to her. The younger thought Nayeon was only going through a phase. But this time, this phase is permanent.

”You..alright?” Jeongyeon opened the door slowly looking for Chaeyoung on her bed.

Chaeyoung lifted her head a little.

“Yeah. I’m fine. You can go now.”

Jeongyeon scratch her nape and walked closer to Chaeyoung. The older ran her fingers on Chaeyoung’s dried skin and lips.

”Your eyes are swollen...your lips and skin is dry..what’s happening?”

”Nayeon...she already broke up with me and I don’t know why...”

”You guys are so far from each other Chaeng...if it lasted long it wont even have a good ending...”

”I should’ve expect that earlier...”

Everyday, Chaeyoung will open her phone waiting for Nayeon to reply to her but one week passed and still Nayeon won't answer. She wait, everyday without fail, grabbing that little light she still see in her dreams. Hoping that everything can turn back again. 

The things Nayeon told her are coming back everyday without fail.

The scolding, the argument, the random things that will pop out out of the blue. The sweet messages, the virtual kisses, their relationship...

She's such a fool for not believing and listening to Nayeon. She just realized that Nayeon wants her to know how to take care of herself properly but she didn't believed her. She just go on with her life, thinking that she will not lose Nayeon even if she won't change the way she's living. 

"I miss you so much, Nayeon."

Bars, girls, drinks and smoke. The only things that matters to Chaeyoung, she didn't need anyone. She just want to enjoy her life. 

“If you start drinking again, I’m going to kill you.” 

Chaeyoung chuckled bitterly while reading to Nayeon’s old message.

“Well, I’m already drinking.”

All of the messages she sent to Nayeon were left on read, unreplied. Chaeyoung can't go on like this. She love Nayeon, she wants Nayeon and she's going to do anything to find her. Chaeyoung is a psycho. She will find Nayeon by hook or by crook.

 “I’ll find you, Nayeon. I’ll find you.”

Chaeyoung shivered when someone caress her shoulders.

”Hey hottie, are you ready for our hot session tonight?” The girl behind her bit her ear.

”Yeah.” Chaeyoung turned and layed the girl on her bed.

In one moment Chaeyoung went rough to the girl underneath her because of her anger, confusion, and her heartbroken.

As soon as the girl released, Chaeyoung told her to dress up and leave.

Chaeyoung grabbed her backpack and drove to some kind of private place which is owned by her friend, Mina.

Chaeyoung cleared and opened the metal door by entering the password “0324”

”Hey!”

”Hmm? Chaeyoung? Oh yeah I forgot you told me that you’re coming. Did you bring any latte?”

”Yeah I did. Some donuts too.”

Chaeyoung put the food on the desk and sat beside Mina where her full computer gaming set is.

”So, which chick you want me to track this time?”

”Here, this is her e-mail address and her phone number. Can you crack her password and her address from her gps?” Chaeyoung gave Mina her phone.

”Heh! Easy one.” Mina replied.

Chaeyoung bit her inner cheek feeling worried if Mina couldn’t do it. But nevertheless, Mina is a great hacker and she never failed.

”It says here she’s in Gwangju. It’s not far from here you know?” 

“Gwangju? Heh! Distance bulls. I’m going to hunt her down.”

Chaeyoung immediately go to Gwangju, to Nayeon's apartment. She knocked but no one answered. She saw someone approaching her. 

The person is wearing a black hoodie and walking towards her. She's looking at her phone and by the time she bumped at Chaeyoung, that's where she realized that Chaeyoung is there. 

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bumped on you. Are you okay?" 

The stranger help Chaeyoung to be on her feet because she just fall. Chaeyoung having exhaustion and loneliness filling her body, quickly get up and mock the one who bumped her. 

"Didn't you see me standing here? Are you blind? Do you want me to kill you?"

Chaeyoung held her in the collar. The stranger just silently stand in front of Chaeyoung and stay still. 

"Why don't you talk!?"

"Chaeyoung..."

Chaeyoung eyes widened when she realized who's in front of her. She quickly put down the stranger's hood and look at her face. 

"Nabongs..."

Nayeon blushed when she saw Chaeyoung's face brighten at her sight. She look away at Chaeyoung because she might do something to this cute baby. She really can't handle Chaeyoung's cuteness especially when she's now in front of her.

"W-what are you doing here...?"

When Nayeon look again at Chaeyoung because she didn't answer her, Chaeyoung quickly captured her lips. 

"Hmm." They moan in sync. 

Nayeon quickly pulled away and look around, she hope that no one saw even if it's night now. She let out a sigh of relief when she see no one. She will be roasted if someone from her block saw what they did. 

"Nayeon, I missed you." 

Chaeyoung hug Nayeon. Her wished did come true now. To hold Nayeon, to kiss her and to feel her warmth. 

"Wa-wait, Chaeyoung. It's cold now and you're only wearing light clothing. We should go inside."

Nayeon quickly released herself from Chaeyoung's hug and open her apartment. She didn't know how Chaeyoung found her but she clearly remembered that everything about them already ended. She doesn't want to hurt Chaeyoung anymore than this and she won't forgive herself if Chaeyoung won't safely go home.

"Sit wherever you want. I don't like cleaning that much so bear with me. And also what do you want?"

"I want you." 

Nayeon eyes widened when she felt Chaeyoung's hands roaming in her lower body. She was back hugged by Chaeyoung and really she's pissed because Chaeyoung's like this. 

"Stop or I'll let you sleep outside tonight." 

When Chaeyoung didn't stop herself, she grab Chaeyoung's hand and push the younger in the wall while gripping her wrist tightly. This little one is really stubborn. Nayeon look at the younger who's biting her lip and she can't believe that hungry look in her eyes. Nayeon sigh and just go to her little kitchen earning a groan from the younger. 

"Why did you leave me hanging, Nabongs? It's our long awaited reunion." 

Chaeyoung got closer to Nayeon and plan to but she saw Nayeon holding a knife and a little pissed so she back off. 

"Chaeyoung, do you not remember what happened?" Nayeon look at Chaeyoung. "Do you want me to stab you? Don't try anything to me now."

"What? You're not serious about that, right? Also, I'm here now. You can do want you want with me and I won't stop you."

Chaeyoung gave Nayeon a teasing smirk but the latter just ignore it and get back to cooking. 

"You might be hungry so just sit and wait for me while I cook and we will eat together." 

Nayeon opened the stove. 

"And?" 

"And what?"

"What she we will do after?" Chaeyoung won't give up. 

"I'll watch some movie and you will go home." Nayeon rolled her eyes.

"Fine."

Chaeyoung pouted and just sit on the couch, watching tv as she wait for Nayeon to finish cooking. 

"Chaeyoung, let's eat."

Nayeon seat on the couch with Chaeyoung and place the dish she cooked. Chaeyoung just silently grab some, she's still pouting because Nayeon rejected her.

When they finished eating, Nayeon get to the sink to wash the dishes. Chaeyoung followed her and hug her from behind. Nayeon just let Chaeyoung because she's not doing anything that can make her angry. Silence elope them, the beating of their hearts are the only things that do the talking. 

How much they missed it each other, those moments that they shared even just through a screen, the advices, the scolding. All of that plays in their minds as they continue to stand and indulging themselves in their own world. 

"Chaeyoung, I missed you." Nayeon's eyes widened when she realized what she just said. "Oh, for—"

"I missed you, I love you."

Chaeyoung voiced crack. Overwhelming emotions get to her as she remembered everything, every little things that Nayeon told her. She can't believe that she just let go of the only person who let her see the good in the world. Even in bad times, Nayeon helped her get over it and let it pass. 

Chaeyoung even tighten her hug, scared that Nayeon will again break their connection. She can't bear to face Nayeon at a time like this. She look pathetic and weak but even so she liked being like this with Nayeon.

"Chaeyoung..."

Nayeon hold Chaeyoung hands, the younger is trembling and sobbing. She turn to Chaeyoung who's head is bowed down because she don't want Nayeon to see her crying because she regret not listening to her. 

"Chaeyoung, look at me."

Chaeyoung shook her head, Nayeon just smile. Nayeon cupped Chaeyoung's face and make Chaeyoung faced her. She closed her eyes and kissed Chaeyoung in the lips. The younger was shocked because of what the older is doing at first but when Nayeon moved her lips, Chaeyoung grab the opportunity and kiss back. 

They're breathless when they decided to part. Nayeon rest her forehead on Chaeyoung's as they both shared the sweet silence between them. 

"I want to do that for a long time now." Nayeon said between her pants. 

"Me too." 

Chaeyoung hugged Nayeon and pulled her closer. 

"Umm, Nayeon. Can I stay for tonight?" Chaeyoung become embarassed right now. 

"Of course, princess." Nayeon look at Chaeyoung directly in the eyes. "But don't do something bad or you will sleep on the couch." 

"I-I won't do that!" Chaeyoung greatly denied.

She wished she can have Nayeon though. 

Later Nayeon huffed and was brushing her teeth at the sink and she took way too much time. She took a towel and wiped her face. She rests her hands on the sink and her forehead on the mirror.

”Is this real? Is she a ghost or it’s the wrong person?” Nayeon mumbled. ”But I kissed her..”

Nayeon traced her fingers on her lips feeling that Chaeyoung’s kiss is still warm and fresh.

Nayeon got herself back together and finally went out from the bathroom. She’s a bit surprised seeing Chaeyoung already asleep on her queen sized bed.

”That’s my side though...” Nayeon smiled.

She sat down and gave the pillow a few pats before laying down.She faced to Chaeyoung whom facing her back to her. Nayeon felt awkward but she wants to hold Chaeyoung in her arms so bad. 

She scooted closer and wrapped her arm on Chaeyoung’s waist as she bury her face at the back of Chaeyoung’s neck.

”God...”Nayeon inhaled Chaeyoung’s hair scent.

“I know I smell good as hell so don’t sniff me like that.” Chaeyoung mumbled. 

”I cant help it...I’ve been longing for this...”

”Well, you can do it all you want then.”

2 weeks later.

”Goddammit! Why the hell Chaeyoung didn’t answer my calls? It’s been two weeks she disappeared just like that!”

Nayeon threw her phone and let herself settle down on the bed.

Chaeyoung decided not to wake Nayeon from her deep slumber. She wants Nayeon to think that she's okay. She made the older worried for her like hell when they are together so she doesn't want to see Nayeon worried now. 

She just better head home and let Nayeon rest. Rest from worrying about her, rest for understanding her, rest from hurting herself because of her and her for loving someone like her. She will leave Nayeon as the cheerful Chaeyoung whom Nayeon met two years ago. 

Nayeon called again. Again and again.

”Yeoboseyo?”

”Chaeyoung!!! Finally you answered!”

"Uhh,  I’m not Chaeyoung. I’m her friend, Sana. Chaeyoung is currently not here..."

"Where is she?" 

Nayeon tried to calm herself. She get nervous suddenly and her heart started to race like crazy. 

"She's in the hospital. Lung cancer, stage four."

"What? What hospital!?"

Nayeon quickly hung up when Sana said where the hospital is. She need to see Chaeyoung, she need to talk to her. She needs her. 

"Chaeyoung is in room 0428." The station nurse said. 

Nayeon marched her way to the room where Chaeyoung is. She see a pale looking girl, in a white bed with a white hospital dress, barely hanging on dear life. 

"Chaeyoung..."

Nayeon's tears suddenly fell, the rush of guilt, pity and regrets flooded her mind. She hate herself for this. 

Nayeon slowly walk towards the helpless body in front of her. She caress the younger's cheek, waking her in a deadly slumber. 

Chaeyoung looked at her, the sparks in her eyes was gone. The cheerful and stubborn Chaeyoung that Nayeon always talked to for the past two years was gone. All she see is a Chaeyoung who only want right now is for the heaven to take her. The blankness of her stare as she meet Nayeon's eyes greatly stab the older. 

"Chaeyoung, I'm sorry... I'm sorry..."

Nayeon sob, she regretted everything that happened to her. She wished Chaeyoung would just be hers forever but she didn't believe. She didn't believed in that little chance that is left thus just ditched Chaeyoung alone. 

Chaeyoung wished that Nayeon won't see her at a state like this but she already did. She can't console the love of her life. She can't even wipe her tears because she's so weak. She can't even love her properly. 

She regretted everything that she did when Nayeon and her part ways. Those arguments that she caused because she don't listen. Those tears that been shed because of their own fault. All of that, she regret all of that. 

Still, she will be the first to go. She can't stay much longer. She don't want to see Nayeon like this much longer. She wants Nayeon to move on and forget about her. She wants her to be happy, she wants her to be satisfied which she didn't give even if she can. 

On her remaining time she wants Nayeon to feel special. She wield her last strength and wiped Nayeon's tears. She can't quiet talk but she will still try, for Nayeon. The one she loved the most. 

"I... Love... You... Im... Nayeon..."

"I love you too, Son Chaeyoung... Don't leave me." Nayeon said even if she knew that is Chaeyoung's farewell to her. 

The heartbeat monitor form a straight line, Nayeon cry her heart's out and kiss Chaeyoung's lips over and over again but she can't do anything now... 

Chaeyoung leave her...

One year later. 

Nayeon sat on the grass and feel the cold wind hitting her face. She came early because she want to spend her time all day with her special someone. 

She brought flowers and even have a picnic blanket prepared, she will spend her whole day talking and talking until she get tired of her.

It became her monthly routine to visit Chaeyoung and spend her whole day talking to her in the silent hill Chaeyoung chose to be buried. 

"You really pick a great place for our date, huh?"

Nayeon will always start her conversation with her with that phrase. She talk about all things that happened to her and some random stuffs that comes to mind. 

"I wish that you can kiss me though."

Nayeon jokingly said and laugh but her tears started falling. She missed Chaeyoung so much. She miss her. She miss her. 

"I miss you. I love you."

Nayeon curled herself up in a fetal position, crying herself to sleep next to Chaeyoung. Not caring if she will die from coldness.

Afterall, her heart already died along with the one she loves the most in the world. 

----

I finished it :)