a/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for the longest time, oops. /it's i'm sorry/ but anyway...

I’ve known unnie since I was little. We've watched each other grow up with the joys and pains that came with it. Every first day of school, every birthday, every moment - we had each other. I’d cuddle close to her whenever she cried over loser boyfriends, fake friends, on days she almost gave up on her dreams & especially on days when she felt like giving up on herself altogether.

Sometimes I felt so useless because I couldn’t do much for unnie while she did everything and more for me. But I stood by her and tried to give her the comfort she needed in my own way, even more so when she fought with eomma and appa.

"Are you crazy? Why would you throw away your education for a silly dream like this?!" I heard eomma yelling one night.

Of course I came running into the living room where the three of them were. I sat next to unnie who was shaking with anger as tears poured down her face, "Eomma, this is my life! And I think this is what I’m meant to be doing, to put a smile on others’ faces through my talent!"

Unnie, don't cry!

"Yes we know you have talent -lots of it- but it won’t be enough to make a stable living out of!"

"Why don't you have more faith in me? I really want to do this and I'll do everything I can to make it happen," unnie answered back in a calm but firm tone.

"Go ahead! You'll see, you'll come running back to your father and I just as quick!" 

After that big fight, I started seeing unnie less and less. She’d leave early in the morning and come home late at night, sometimes not coming home at all except to change her clothes before she had to leave again. Everytime she came, she hugged me just a little bit tighter and told me not to worry because she’d be home soon. I missed her a lot and I knew she was still hurting; I was hurting too because I couldn’t be there for her even if I wanted to.

One day unnie came home with the brightest smile on her face. I met her at the door and hugged her, wondering what made her so happy but thankful for whatever it was that did.

Unnie! What’s got you so excited, huh?

“Jjing-jjing ah, Unnie’s going to debut soon! Unnie is going to live out her dream!”

Wah, daebak! I’m so proud of you, Unnie!!

“Unnie’s going to sing in a group with three dongsaengs, Jjing-ah. Remember I told you about them? My friends? Wheein-ah, Hyejin-ah, and your Byulie-unnie!” 

Omo, that hamster-looking unnie you were complaining about to Yonghee-unnie? Tsk!

Unnie must’ve noticed my confused expression because she just started laughing at me and hugged me harder.

“I know, it’s hard to believe, right? But they're all really good people, Jjing-ah. I'm sure you'd like them once you meet them, too."

—

“Yah! Could you please eat slowly? Chew your food properly or else you might get indigestion!”

Aish, leave me be, Noona. You don’t see me telling you how to eat!

“Daebak-ah, promise you’ll be a good boy and listen to eomma, appa, and your noonas while I’m away, okay?”

You’re leaving me again?! Where are you going this time!

“Noona is going to debut soon so I need to stay in Seoul now full time. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be living with your Wheein, Hyejin, and Yongsun noonas so i’ll be okay.”

Hmpf, you’re leaving me for that weird noona you always talk about and keep fighting with? Aigoo, that sounds like disaster if you ask me.

Byulie-noona wrapped me up in a big hug which I tried wiggling out of to no avail. As annoying she could be sometimes, I really was going to miss her a lot. She'd barely come home to Bucheon anymore once she started training to wiggle around and "rap" down in Seoul with her new friends. 

“Don’t be sad and never skip your meals. Also, don’t fight with your Seulgi and Yesol noonas!”

I could say the same thing for you, Moonstar-noona. You and Yongsun-noona need to stop being weird so you don’t end up fighting each other!

Once noona had met her friends, she didn't stop talking about them to eomma and Seulgi-noona. She always especially mentioned this girl she called 'Yongsun-unnie' whome she spent all her time with. Noona always says that she was weird in a cute way, had a loud dolphin-like laugh, and really squishy cheeks. I'd never met her before but when I do, I'll remember to thank her.

Byulie-noona was always a quiet and shy girl but after these last few months in Seoul with her new friends, she seemed much more confident and alive. Now she always, always had a big smile on her face when she talked about them and their adventures together. Although she didn't think I noticed it, there was a special twinkle in her eye when Yongsun-noona came up in the conversation. And she came up in the conversation a lot, like she was the only topic Byulie-noona could ever talk about most of the time.

Aigoo, what will I do with these two dumb noonas?

—

“Jjing-ah, I’m home! I missed you so much, baby! I got so lonely without you.”

Hmm, that’s not what I heard from Yonghee-unnie. She said you’re doing just fine with your dongsaengs, and you have that puppy-looking unnie with you anyway!

“Yah, why are you looking at me like that? It’s true! I miss my favorite roommate and cuddle buddy.”

I know for a fact you’ve found a new cuddle buddy, Kim Yongsun. Aigoo, even on those vlives you’re so clingy! Gross~

“I love the girls and all but sometimes they’re just so…annoying. Aish, especially Byul. What do I do with that kid? I think she made it her life’s mission to tease me endlessly, Jjing-ah.”

Oh unnie, no wonder they call you Yeba. Yeppeun-pabo, indeed.

“She’s so greasy! And what’s with all the skinship? She’s more of a koala than a hamster at this point with all her clinging to me.”

As if you don’t do it, too. Besides, I know you like it anyway even if you pretend you don’t.

“For all her greasiness and teasing, I won’t deny she’s such a good friend. She always listens to me and tries to cheer me up when I’m sad or I miss you guys too much. You know she’s always willing to accompany me everywhere and she even surprises me with tteokbokki or snacks from time to time!”

I tilt my head and give unnie a knowing look that she doesn’t seem to catch.

"I don't know what it is but she makes me feel so warm and annoyed and giggly and safe all at the same time," unnie sighs while running her hands through my fur. 

There's a four letter word for that, unnie, that you don't want to admit to yourself just yet.