Summer July 2017

 

Brian couldn’t take his eyes off of her. She was stunning, appealing in the most alluring way.

 

Park Jihyo wasn’t beautiful in the classical way, she didn’t have a veil of sleek black, poker-straight hair or ruby red lips; no piercing baby blue eyes, or skin as white as snow. She was of average height and larger than an ulzzang model, but in her ordinariness she was beautiful. Something radiated from within her that rendered her irresistible to him.

 

They lay in the bed of his truck. Blankets and pillows were scattered about making the surface more comfortable than it actually was. They had skipped school with a few other friends and were currently hiding out at a beach, the rest of the group wasn’t around but Brian couldn’t care less where they were. He had all he wanted laying right beside him.

 

“Why do keep looking at me?” Jihyo asked, her face grew a shade a red he was used to seeing these days and he chuckled.

 

“Because I want to.”

 

“Why?” She fidgeted under his gaze and he wraps an arm around her holding her still.

 

“Because you’re very pretty.”

 

Jihyo laughed, her body relaxing a bit under him, “I know I’m pretty but why do you keep staring? Aren’t you bored?”

 

“I could stare at you all day.”

 

“I doubt it, you’d get sick of looking at me after an hour or so.”

 

Brian shook his head, he looked her in the eyes and in all seriousness confessed what he had been feeling for a while.

 

“When I look at you, it's almost like time and space collapse into tiny particles and there is nothing left but the two of us here and now. I have no worries of the future, no care. My universe is consumed with you. I could run forever, hide forever, but in the end, every path will always lead me right back to you.”

Brian traces his thumb lightly over her bottom lip. It pouts slightly, and he has such an urge to kiss her he almost braces himself over her to steal her breath. He focus his gaze on her lips that are now rises in one corner. He doesn’t look up. If he looks up at her he knows he will find himself at the mercy of her warm brown eyes.

 

“I mean it. I could spend the rest of my life right here. Jihyo I… I think I’m in love you…”

 

Winter February 2018

 

Brian sits at the back of the class gazing longingly at the two love birds near the door. His classmate jumps up on her tippy toes and pulls the taller boy down to her so that she could whisper something to him.

 

He would do anything to have Jihyo whisper in his ear. She used to do it constantly despite the fact that she didn’t know how to be quiet. It made them all laugh.

 

Brian hasn’t seen Jihyo in months. Frankly he’d do anything just to catch a glimpse of her. Just to know that she was okay.

 

He leans back against his chair until it is leaning back against the wall and he relaxes into that suspended position staring at the plain ceiling.

 

Does she wake up on her own? And wonder where she is? Does she live with all her faults?....

 

Brian doses off…

 

 

 

Summer August 2017
 

“I’m pregnant.”

 

Jihyo’s words spill out of like venom and land in Brian's gut as stray bullets. The blood drains from his face and for a split second he thinks he’s passed out until he notices his discomfort comes from the pounding of his heart in his ears. He hasn’t fainted, he is fully awake, and his body feels light and heavy at the same time.

 

It’s during times like these when he would crack a joke to lighten up the mood but he is in no mood to fool around. He's deadly serious. He’s about to vomit.

 

There is a soft clattering sound of plastic on wood as the small device that was, moments ago in his hand, falls to the ground. It lands with the small window facing up, the two bright pink lines tormenting him. Neither move to pick it up.

 

“Brian? Are you okay?” Jihyo asks, she moved closer to him. Her intent had been to comfort him, hold his hand, pat his back, she hadn’t made up her mind before she made contact, but before she could do anything he jerks away from her. As if she was fire, making her stomach sink. She is hurt by his reaction. She hadn’t expected this, not from Brian. What is this reaction, she thought.

 

Brian doesn’t know he is holding his breath, in the moment he is trying to understand the words she’d said to him. Trying to make sense of what they meant and why they sounded so unfamiliar, so irrational.

 

“Brian say something,” Jihyo whispers.

 

What did she want him to say? What could he say? There was only one thing on his mind right now and that was getting out of this place. Getting far away from her.

 

“Brian-”

 

“Get rid of it.” He mumbles.

 

His words come out strained, he inhales finally realizing there was no air in his lungs. Brian swallows.

 

“What?” Brian meets her gaze and he can see the hurt in her eyes.

 

He didn’t realize it before but he can see now that she has been crying. Her eyes are puffy and red. Brian looks around the room trying to distract him from her appearance. He wanted to comfort her, he knew he should. But there was an itching in his soul, a need to run away and never return.

 

“Jihyo… we’re too young to take on something like this. I’m not ready, I don’t think I’ll ever be ready. Just… just get rid of it.” He repeats.

 

Then he turns to leave, heading out of her room, shoulders sunken, hands in his pockets. Before he knows what’s doing on Jihyo leaps forward and stands in front of him. A new set of tears collect in her eyes,