The horizon shone in bright orange light as the wave sound tickled his earlobes. Wind danced around him as the blue sea made his heart shuddered of such a beauty. The scene felt so completed yet they’re not. In his way to find freedom, he had lost so much. He felt so incomplete and empty so suddenly as a tears almost slipped out from his eyes corner.

“What’s wrong?” a voice startled him as a man approached him. He shook his head and hid his teary eyes behind his knees; he hated seeing him when he was in this state.

“Is there anything I can do for you?” he asked in warm voice. No, he had done more than enough. Even after asking his self so many times, he still couldn’t find a reason why he felt such an emotion. Maybe, maybe the guilt was still there, eating him alive slowly.

“Jae, seriously, you’re freaking me out,” the man spoke as he secured Jaejoong in his arms. Trembling a little, Jaejoong hugged the man with all his strength and whispered to never let he go or else he might lose his sane mind. The only thing that kept Jaejoong sane was the man’s presence after all.

“I won’t ever leave you. I promised, didn’t I?” the man Jaejoong’s hair and it calmed him. They hugged each other tightly as they watched the sun set beautifully, sitting on the sand, in front of their new home. It was bought few years ago and it had nice view, facing the blue ocean.

[FLASHBACK]

“NOOOOO!!!” Jaejoong could only shout his fear as he saw Yoochun was ready to crush Yunho into nothing. Yoochun was ready to kill Yunho but then, why he stopped?

“Chunnie, please stop this…”

Yoochun couldn’t believe his eyes or ears. Junsu was standing in front of him, shielding Yunho, asking him to stop. 

“Please Chunnie, don’t hurt them…They’re not at fault at all…No one killed me…I killed myself”

“No! That’s not true!!! You wouldn’t die if Jaejoong didn’t ask you to leave!” Yoochun was shouting to himself. Jaejoong took this chance to get Yunho away from Yoochun, securing the injured man in his embrace.

“Chunnie, please…don’t hurt me more than this…I don’t want to see you like this…”

Junsu was crying, Yoochun froze. Had he really hurt, Junsu? Had he? What had he done? Then, the voices went back into Yoochun’s head; the voices that told him to kill Jaejoong, to kill Yunho, to hurt everyone. 

“Shut up! All of you! Stop screaming inside my head! Leave me alone!!!” Yoochun shouted as he put his hands on his head. He began to make ice sword and attacked without a target, making the stoned wall fell on the ground and the cave began to shake. Then, he lost his strength and dropped on his knees. It felt like forever till Yoochun finally stopped shouting; Yunho and Jaejoong watched the entire scene in horror. 

“Chunnie…” Jaejoong was the first one called the name. It hurt him a lot to see Yoochun in such a state. Jaejoong was about to come closer to Yoochun but stopped when Yunho grasped his arm.

“You should listen to Yunho, Jaejoong ah,” Yoochun’s voice was finally back to normal. His eyes were warm and not cold anymore. His voice wasn’t filled with anger or hatred anymore.

“Can you stand up?” Yoochun directed the question to Yunho as the man nodded,” Then, get Jaejoong out of here…”

Without hesitating, Yunho used all his strength to get up and pulled Jaejoong. Of course, the other man refused to leave. The ground began to tremble and shake in violently at the time Yunho managed to drag Jaejoong out of the cave.

“Chunnie, please, come with us!” Jaejoong shouted desperately as he caught the last glance of Yoochun’s smiling face. It was vaguely clear that Yoochun mumbled ‘I’m sorry’ to both of them before the rock began to crumble and shut the cave exit completely.

[END OF FLASHBACK]

“Yunnie,” Jaejoong called as he leaned on Yunho’s shoulder,” Do you think…they’re together now? I mean, in heaven? Are they still blaming me for everything? Do Yoochun still hate me and Junsu still hurt because I blamed him? I know I don’t deserve a forgiveness but---“

Yunho silenced Jaejoong with a sweet kiss on the lips and then he spoke,” I think…they want you to stop blaming yourself for everything. Rather than regretting and drowning in guilt, we should do our best living for them, don’t you think?”