Today was Friday and a few of my co-workers invited me to join them at a happy hour on St. James Square. Naturally I said no, I wasn’t one for crowded places and I wouldn’t be having fun if I was anxious; yes I know that I shouldn’t feel anxious in social situations but I disdained the idea of an unfamiliar location, with unfamiliar people, doing unfamiliar things like dancing, the heavens know that I was born with two left feet and thus I was blessed with a nice bottom so I could plant my happy in a seat and not move unless I had to use the bathroom. It took a lot of coaxing from who I would consider my closest friend at work, Sarah, who told me that she had the perfect cure to rid me of my anxiety for the night. I know what her cure was, it was alcohol; lots and lots of alcohol.

       “I think I’ll pass,” I said, grimacing at the memory of the last time I went out with Sarah for her Bachelorette party, I was so out of it that apparently I ended up passing out in the walk in pantry of her parent’s house. Imagine the next morning when her mom found me sprawled out on the floor holding the bag of double milk chocolate Milano’s in one hand and a half eaten Milano in the other. What could I say, double milk chocolate Milano’s were my downfall even when drunk.

Sarah leaned forward against my desk with a smug expression on her face, “what if I told you that your cutie who lives on the floor on top of yours is there every Friday night with his friend?” 

My hands froze over the keyboard and I glanced back at her momentarily before continuing to type a memo, “I’d say you’re bluffing.” Sarah clicked her tongue as she walked around my desk, dragging the tip of her finger across the smooth wooden surface, “that’s too bad, because I know for a fact that that restaurant is his groups designated hangout because of his friend’s parent’s own the restaurant.”

     “And you know this how exactly?” I asked in exasperation, she was relentless when she wanted something and I knew that I was bound to cave in just to shut her up.

     “I know the bartender there, his name is Toni, we go way back from our college days.” Sarah said, a proud grin on her face, “you can’t say no, Mills, this is your chance to talk to him outside of the usual ‘the mailman misplaced some of your mail in my mailbox’ conversation which the boy is bound to find out that you’re breaking into his mailbox to steal his mail and then give it to him as an excuse to talk to him. Not gonna lie, it’s kind of pathetic and suuuper creepy.”

My eyes widened at her words and quickly glanced around the office, “Jeez Sarah, any louder and I think all of Seattle will her you. “ I spat sarcastically, “if you really want me to go then fine, I’ll go but only to shut you up. I will only stay for an hour and then that’s it, I’m going home.”

Sarah pumped her fist in the air at her clear victory before she sashayed out of my cubicle with a wave of her hand, “meet you there after work, don’t forget to fix yourself up before you get there, a little lip stick and blush should do the trick.”

Before I knew it the clock struck five and it was time to head out, picking up my bag and water bottle I was out of that office faster than you could say apple pie. “Hey Mily, heard you’re joining us tonight for happy hour at the square! Need a ride?” Asked Jerry, the office sweetheart who doubled up as the office heartthrob thanks to his deep blue eyes and his muscular frame; if only I could like Jerry instead, “No, thanks, Jerry, My car is parked in the garage.”

“Okay, then I guess I’ll see you there!” Jerry waved after me with a handsome smile, yeah I should like Jerry, at least he was more my age compared to HIM. The “him” I’m referring to was none other than Jeon Jungkook who had recently moved into the apartment just above mine, I was in B7 and he was in C7 as I would come to learn through our first mail exchange which was truly an accident the first time around. It was then that I came to learn that Jungkook was four years younger than me and I had to go home and wash away the sinful thoughts I had of him, he was a baby, not even of legal drinking age yet. Then again, here I was having a school girl crush on him and resorting to steal a piece of his mail in order to have more encounters with him. Sarah was right, it was pathetic and incredibly creepy of me to be doing that kind of , I’m a grown woman for goodness sake! I should just be able to talk to him the way any normal human being would, but no, my stupid anxiety has to go and complicate things for me.

When I finally arrived at the square, Jerry, Sarah and few other familiar faces from the office were already sitting at a high top table glancing at the alcohol section of the menu. I glanced around the restaurant and my eyes caught sight of a familiar coconut hairstyle at the far left corner by the window, it seemed that Sarah’s informant was right, because in the flesh Jeon Jungkook sat with his friends munching on French fires and laughing at something funny. My heart fluttered with anticipation at the sight of him, I didn’t know how to feel about him being here, I was both relieved and mortified at the same time. Questions of doubt came to surface and ‘what if’ scenarios played out in my head; what if I fell and embarrassed myself in front of him? What if he has a girlfriend and she is going to meet him here?

All of those thoughts were silenced as Jerry and Sarah called out my name in an unnecessarily loud volume, no doubt to get someone else’s attention on me. I walked up to our table and Jerry instantly pulled out the seat between himself and our co-worker Jose, my seat had a good view of Jungkook and his friend’s table despite the walking traffic of waiters and guests getting to and from the restroom.

     “Nice to see that you actually came, Mils!” Jerry laughed delightedly, placing his arm over my right shoulder and squeezing it a little before removing his hand. I felt my face get a little warm as a response to his words. It’s true that every time there has been a happy hour, Jerry and Sarah would always try to get me on board and I would always give them the response of “next time.”

     “Stop busting her balls, Jerry,” Sarah said as she raised her hand over her head to flag down someone who was behind me, “Hey, Toni! We’re ready to order!” she called out.

By the time our drinks got to the table we were already immersed in a story about the time Jerry was at the night club just a few blocks away from here and he saw a cute girl he wanted to talk to. I had to admit the story was indeed one of hilarity, “and then I ask her, ‘what’s a cute girl like you doing in the corner all yourself’ and she says plain as day like it was the most obvious thing, ‘I had to fart.’ Of course, I laughed, hard, to the point that I was practically wheezing as I clutched onto Jerry’s arm for support afraid that I was going to topple to the ground in laughter. From the corner of my eye, I glanced over at Jungkook’s table and for the briefest moment, our eyes met, though I’m not entirely sure; it could have been wishful thinking, or that he was looking past me towards the door. I down the first chocolate martini and I’m feeling fine, my alcohol tolerance had improved greatly since Sarah’s Bachelorette party three years ago. If I stuck to just Chocolate Martini’s, I should be just fine for the night, no hangover tomorrow morning and no regrets.

   “Okay ladies,” Tara called from the right end of the table, “it’s time to play a game!” She flagged down Toni and ordered six shots of tequila for each of us, on her tab of course since she was probably the most well off of all of us as the CEO’s secretary. “We’re going to play ‘Never have I ever’ and for every situation that you have done, you down an entire shot.”

Toni brought out the shots with the assistance of a few other waiters and I reluctantly looked at mine, I thought I was going to have a nice and easy night, but apparently I spoke too soon and now my anxiety was starting to get to me. I sighed as I glanced back up at Tara as she read off the first statement, “Never have I ever been kissed on the lips.” The entire table groans in unison as we all down the first shot of Tequila, the alcohol leaving a burning sensation down my throat. “Next, never have I ever had ” again everybody drinks the second shot, my head already starting to feel a bit funny. “Never have I ever made out with someone in a public area” I breathed a sigh of relief, I was spared this round but Sarah, Jose, Jerry, Tara, and a few others downed another shot. “Never have I ever flirted with someone at work,” Jerry snorted as he glanced at me and gave a wink, “I’m guilty as charged,” then downed another shot of Tequila while I was still spared for another round. “Never have I ever liked someone younger than me,” my head snapped up and my eyes came to focus on the very reason why I had to down this next shot. “Oh, Mily, I think you have some explaining to do!” Tara said as she not so subtly tilted her head towards Jerry for reasons that are far beyond my comprehension. “