I am truly sorry, my best friend. We’ve known each other since we were kids. Practically we grew up in SM Ent. together. We were always hanging out together and practicing, we always helped one another, we knew each other so well…and I betrayed you.

I am sorry. I truly am. But…I just couldn’t help it. When you said you wanted to introduce to me your new friend, I immediately knew that there’s something going on. As I was waiting in the café the door opened and I saw the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. And then I understood – the friend that you were going to introduce to me was a girl, and not any girl, but the most beautiful girl in Seoul.

She was so cute when she was introducing herself, being all shy and blushing. But after 10 min we were chatting freely as if we knew each other for years. We had so much in common. I was happy. We exchanged numbers…secretly…. I didn’t want you to know. We were meeting secretly…without you knowing…because… I knew from the beginning that you had feelings for her too. From the way you were talking about that friend, from the way your eyes sparkled while talking about that friend, even your voice was different while talking about her…

I am sorry…I was being so sneaky in my actions…but I was scared, scared that I’ll lose her heart because you already had the upper hand as you knew her first, you knew her for longer. And I was scared that I was running out of time to win her heart and so I was acting like a coward. But we got close so fast, I just couldn’t help it. Every time I was near her my heart was beating so fast, with every smile it was skipping a beat, whenever she was grinning from happiness my mind was going black as she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

I found out a lot about her. That she liked the beach, the animals, sweet things, how childish she was most of the times and that she loved going to the amusement park and most of all the ferris wheel.

That one time that we went to a new amusement park and we took you with us, it was because she wanted you to be with us, because she wanted to be with you… I felt threatened and so I did everything I could to show you that I was the one for her and to show you that she wasn’t indifferent toward me. I acted like a child…and so I hurt you…I saw your look…it was empty…you were so hurt because we were so close with her….

Not long after I hurt you with my actions, I did something more worse than that…I asked her to be my girlfriend. She gave it a though and then agreed. I was so happy, we were so happy to be together officially. We went and said it to you so bluntly, we were so heartless, I was so heartless to do this to you. You smiled so brightly and congratulated us, but I could see the pain in your eyes, how you felt betrayed by us…by me… your so called best friend.

And the years passed by so fast, that I couldn’t even notice them. And then again, even when I thought that I couldn’t bring you more pain, I actually did as I proposed to her. We were engaged and soon to marry and these news just added salt to the wound that couldn’t heal. I was feeling guilty for the pain I was causing you, my best friend.  You even agreed to be my best man , even thought it was so hard on you…I really appreciate that. I wanted you to be there for me, how selfish I was !

The smile on your face never left and you were always there for us when we needed help. You kept on smiling…even when she was pregnant…when she was carrying my child…you still kept that smile that could make any miserable person smile too. I thought that…if we name our child after you, the fact that you sacrificed your happiness won’t be that painful, but then when we told you this I understood that it was the wrong choice…there was even more pain in your eyes…all this time I was bringing my best friend only pain…even when I was trying to make things more easy on you…I was actually causing you more and more pain.

I am sorry, my friend. I am truly sorry. I am sorry that I was selfish. I am sorry that I stole the one you love. I am sorry that you sacrificed your happiness. I am sorry that I was so cruel. I am sorry that I betrayed you. I am truly sorry, my best friend, Jong In-ssi. I was always thinking that you will forget her, that you will find someone else and fall for her, but you never did. You stayed sad, lonely, and miserable while I was being the happiest person on earth. And to know that I was the one that caused you this… I cannot do anything else but to hate and despise myself for acting like that. I stole the life that was supposed to be yours.

You don’t deserve this…you don’t deserve to be unhappy…you don’t deserve to be alone… you don’t deserve to have a sly “friend” like me…you are too nice, too helpful, too perfect…and I ruined your life… I am truly sorry my best friend. I never intended to do so. You deserve something more than this…you deserve to be happy…you deserve to be with the person you love…you deserve to have a best friend that won’t stab your back with a knife…

Jong in-ssi, I know that I caused you pain…and that I keep causing you pain…and I have to say that I despise myself for doing that for so many years. I truly hope that one day you will be able to forgive me for what I have done to you…and that you would live a happy life…the life that you deserve. I sincerely hope for that, because you deserve to be happy ... to smile from the bottom of your heart.

Farewell, my best friend…and once again- I’m sorry that I betrayed you.

Doll:

Hi, guys ^^ it's me again ^^ i thought that it would be good if i let you know the whole sad story ^^ i'll be looking foreward to your comments ^^ and thank you for subscribing even thought at the beginning was just a oneshot ^^ i really apreciate it ^^ well then, please look foreward to the next chapter ^^