Do you ever blame yourself for what happens in your life? Do you ever just close your eyes and a flood of memories rush into your head? Does it ever hurt to think about your past? Or how your life is right now?

"Joshua Hong." 

Dark brunette hair, lightly tanned skin, eyes so pure that anyone can look into them and feel his sadness. 

"Yes?" 

"It's your turn, Dr. Elliot will be waiting for you inside his office." The woman behind the counter gave him a bland smile. Joshua sighed as he picked himself up from the chair he sat on. His feet slowly moved towards the pale yellow door, honestly, he didn't want to go in. As soon as his cold palm grasped the rusty looking door knob, chills were sent down his body. He clenched his jaw, closed his eyes, stood there for a second, and entered the door with a small smile. 

"Joshua, it's been a while, how have you been?" Dr. Elliot got up from his chair behind his desk. He fixed his suit as he walked proudly walked towards Joshua. He let out his hand which Joshua grabbed and shook. 

"It has been a while, Dr. Elliot." Joshua spoke softly as he scanned the familiar green leather chair he had seen a couple of years ago. 

"Have a seat." Dr. Elliot suggested as he already has been sitting down across from him.

Joshua slowly sat down and suddenly a rush of memories flooded his mind. He was interrupted by Dr. Elliot's question, "So tell me, how was it?" 

Joshua looked into Dr. Elliot's eyes and trailed to his hands as he noticed he was reaching for a notepad. Joshua sat back and cleared his throat lightly. 

"It was nice, it was something I needed for a very long time." Joshua still spoke softly and sat there in silence. Dr. Elliot scanned Joshua and nodded to himself. He began to write something in his notepad but Joshua didn't know what it was. 

"Tell me, what did you do there for four years?" Dr. Elliot asked as he crossed his legs and sat back as well. Joshua lifted his head lightly while his fingers tapped at the edge of the sofa. 

"Well, I went sightseeing often, read books by the window. My view was amazing, there were snow everywhere and it was beautiful." Joshua sighed to himself and smiled lightly as he looked at Dr. Elliot. 

Dr. Elliot smiled to himself and scribbled down some sentences. "Typical Joshua, always reading." he joked. Joshua let out a faint laugh and sat there in silence again. Dr. Elliot scanned him once more and began to pick at his mustache. 

"Have you visited your father ever since you came back from Japan?" Dr. Elliot said softly but sternly. He examined Joshua as his question left his mouth. Joshua raised his eyebrows quickly and fell back down. For reasons, his heart became slightly heavy, the room began to feel colder than usual, and his finger tapped against the sofa slowly. He heard Dr. Elliot's pen rub against his notepad.

"No." A simple answer left Joshua's lips. He turned his head slowly to look out the window. It was snowing the last time he came here as well.