“How did we get stuck in this situation again?”

Joshua took a step back to examine the disorderly arrangement of assorted cans and boxes of food lying across the counter. Every cabinet had been ransacked, the refrigerator emptied. The kitchen currently looked like the setting of an episode of Chopped, minus the professional chefs.

Jeonghan groaned, sinking into a nearby chair while shooting Joshua a glare. “I dunno, maybe next time don’t tell your folks we know how to cook when we clearly don’t?”

Joshua winced, remembering the unfulfilled promise he’d made to his mother that he would learn how to cook, and in exchange she’d let him move in with Jeonghan. What an absolute lie. The two of them had consumed enough ramen and fast food to have college students do a double take. Healthy eating be damned, the money and time they saved went to more important things like vip tickets to concerts. Totally worth it.

“Can’t we, like, order Chinese takeout and call it homemade?” Jeonghan asked.

“Trust me, my mother is a whole different species. She can tell if food is takeout or homemade in just one bite, my cousin tried to pass it off once and it did not go well,” Joshua countered, moments away from sinking onto the floor and letting the ground swallow him up. ‘Oh god, Jeonghan, what’ll I do when she realizes neither of us can cook? When she realizes how bad my eating habits are? Do you think she’ll take me back to live with her? Or–oh god–do you think she’ll try and live with us? What if–”

Jeonghan smoothly got off the chair and in an instant had a hand over Joshua’s mouth, his irritation overshadowed by amusement at Joshua’s ramblings. “Okay, that’s enough. I highly doubt she’ll force you out of your own residency, and why the hell would she want to live with two broke guys? Listen, let’s just try, alright?” He dropped his hand from Joshua’s face and pulled out his phone. “The Internet is our best friend, after all.”

♡♡♡

“Caribbean Red Rice Salad with Chili-Apricot Dressing and Pignoli Nuts, sounds simple enough,” Jeonghan muttered, rolling his eyes. “I asked for a simple rice recipe and I’m getting King Henry the 8th’s all-you-can-eat buffet.”

Joshua mixed the sauce, or what they hoped was sauce, on the stove, shaking his head. “Jeonghan, I thought you were tech savvy.”

“I am! But Martha Stewart here thinks she can just climb into my search results like some kinda lizard–”

“Okay, you do the cooking and I’ll research,” Joshua said, wiping his uncomfortably damp forehead with the back of his hand. Jeonghan sighed and approached Joshua, his lips quirked up at the corners at the latter’s appearance. “You have sauce on your forehead.”

Joshua wiped at the area but only achieved a more sauce doused forehead as his hands were also unfortunately stained. Jeonghan snickered and grabbed a paper towel, dabbing at Joshua’s forehead with a look akin to fondness as he got it all off. “You do this way too much, you know.”

“What? Get sauce on my face?”

Jeonghan grinned, taking the spoon from Joshua and shifting in front of the stove. “Yeah, that too. But I actually meant that you’re sometimes too cute for your own good.”

Well, if Joshua’s face hadn’t already been pink from the heat of the stove it sure as hell was now.

“Shut up,” he mumbled, grabbing Jeonghan’s phone (even though his own was right on the counter) and scrolling through recipes. Jeonghan only gave him an obnoxiously flirtatious wink before returning to the stove, periodically checking up on the rice in the pot next to it to see if it was done. Soon enough, the smell of food began wafting across their flat and Joshua almost felt proud that they, two absolutely incapable chefs, were able to pull this off.

♡♡♡

Joshua was currently at the stove mixing the milk pudding and being very careful to avoid having the mixture overheat and consequently overflow over the sides of the pot, when Jeonghan came up behind him, pulling him backwards into an embrace.

“Jeonghan…”

“Mm…”

“I’m cooking.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“My arms are trapped.”

“Yeah, I know that too.”

Joshua was spun around so he was facing Jeonghan instead, back to the stove. “We spent all day in this stupid kitchen,” the older pouted, brushing Joshua’s slightly overgrown bangs aside. “And you haven’t even kissed me once today. Not even once!”

Joshua chuckled despite himself, never one to be able to resist Jeonghan’s panderings. “Sorry sorry. I’ll make it up to you. Here.” He swooped forward and planted a kiss on Jeonghan’s cheek before pulling back with a smirk. “That’s all until I finish making this full course meal.” He attempted to turn back around but Jeonghan’s iron grip on his shoulders rendered that action impossible.

“Um, no, I’ve gone 12 entire hours without a kiss. Pay up.”

“I just did.”

“More.”

“You sound like a toddler.”

“And this toddler wants his kiss.” Growing impatient, Jeonghan leaned forward but Joshua couldn’t help but toy with him for a bit longer (after all, he was usually on the receiving end of all the teasing), placing his spoon down and covering Jeonghan’s mouth with his palm, while his other hand was on Jeonghan’s shirt, tightly gripping the fabric in an attempt to hold him off. Jeonghan’s eyebrows furrowed and he shoved his body closer to Joshua, pressing the latter against the stove with nothing but brute force.

Joshua pulled his arm back, which had the unfortunate effect of knocking into the pot of rice on the stove and tipping it over, sending its contents flying all over the kitchen floor. The good news was that both of them managed to steer clear of the disaster, although now there were heaps of rice strewn across the tile floor.

There was a moment of silence before Jeonghan sheepishly cleared his throat. “Sorry…?”

“Yoon Jeonghan...” Joshua said in a low voice, and Jeonghan almost felt like he needed to raise his arms in an act of innocence. Then Joshua sighed, dropping his head, and just when they thought this was as bad as things could get, he suddenly snapped his head up fast enough that it could’ve gave him whiplash, as his eyes widened. “The milk pudding!”

It was too late, as half of the pudding had overflowed and was now decorating the stove like icing. Joshua hastily turned the burner off and groaned, sinking onto the ground. “Guess I’ll just die,” he decided, staring up at the ceiling with a look of lost hope in his eyes.

“Ah…” Jeonghan voiced in dismay, warily eyeing Joshua in fear that the younger was mad at him. “Joshua….” He reached the mess on the stove and scooped some of the leftover rice from the pot in his hands and dipped it in the remaining milk mixture in the other pot.

“What’re you doing?” Joshua asked as Jeonghan approached him with the odd concoction in his hands.

“Say ah,” Jeonghan urged, holding it out to him.

Joshua looked mildly affronted. “What?”

Jeonghan looked at him, biting his bottom lip, as he said, “Get it? It’s rice pudding. Because I took the rice and put it in the milk pudding–”

Maybe it was the fact that both of them were sitting in the middle of the kitchen surrounded by rice with Joshua’s parents arriving shortly, and Jeonghan was offering Joshua a freaking ball of rice doused in milk, but something about the scene was enough to get the both of them up in hysterics.

“What–the hell–Jeonghan–” Joshua choked out in between laughter, wiping at his eyes. “I hate this–I hate you–”

Jeonghan beamed, although his stomach hurt from laughing to the point of no return. “The opportunity presented itself so I had to,” he replied, helping Joshua up. “Now let’s clean up and try making the rice again. Who needs milk pudding anyway, right?”

Joshua resigned, and the pair cleared up the place as fast as possible and set another pot of rice on the stove.

♡♡♡

“She’ll be here in 5 minutes,” Joshua announced. “Oh god, what if she sees how much fat I’ve gained–”

Jeonghan tossed an empty box of cake mix at him which Joshua narrowly avoided. “If you dare call yourself fat and disrespect the word one more time, I will personally invite your mother to live with us so she can stuff you up until you actually are,” he threatened. “You look fine, Joshua.”

“I bet my eyebags are more prominent–”

“Who cares? They make you look cute.”

“In what universe–”

The sound of the doorbell interrupted their bickering and Joshua squeaked, bolting in the opposite direction of the front door. Jeonghan shook his head but couldn’t help but smile. “Guess I’ll get it then.”

When Joshua finally reemerged from his bedroom, his parents were engaged in a lively conversation with Jeonghan which included them complimenting every aspect of Jeonghan in existence. After an emotional reunion which involved Joshua’s mother pointing out how thin he looked (earning a very obvious smirk from Jeonghan), they all sat at the table, and Joshua immediately made it clear that they made everything themselves.

Joshua’s mother smiled. “I know.”

Joshua raised an eyebrow and she pointed to the kitchen. “There’s milk pudding all over the stove.”

Joshua flushed, realizing too late that they’d forgotten to clean that part up. “Ah, well…”

She laughed. “I’m proud. You two really did your best for us and we’re grateful.”

Jeonghan’s overtly smug grin was not doing Joshua any favors, but nonetheless, he smiled, feeling grateful that things eventually worked themselves out.

♡♡♡

After a very lively discussion wherein Jeonghan managed to out both Joshua’s unhealthy study habits and his lack of calorie consumption (pointedly ignoring the kicks and glares Joshua sent his way), his parents finally left.

The moment they did, Joshua let out a sigh of relief as he collapsed onto the couch. It wasn’t that he wanted them gone, it was more along the lines of the fact that he was exhausted from the events of the day and was glad everything was taken care of.

Well, almost everything.

“Shua…”

Joshua looked up to find Jeonghan looking back at him with the most undisguised look of haughtiness on display. “What did I tell you? I knew you were worried over nothing.”

Joshua groaned. “Just for your little stunt, I’m not kissing you today.” He made to get up, but was forced back onto the couch by Jeonghan, whose habit was to cage Joshua between him and whatever thing was behind him.

“It was all in goodwill. You really do stay up too late studying and you often skip meals.”

Joshua kept his face as stoic as possible but all was lost when Jeonghan said, “Come on, don’t make me force feed you my homemade rice pudding.”

The moment he laughed, Jeonghan seized the opportunity to close the distance between them, resting his weight on the couch behind them. Joshua gave in and finally kissed back, wrapping his arms around Jeonghan and holding him in place.

“I hate you,” Joshua murmured as they pulled back, though still sharing each other’s breaths.

“You love me,” Jeonghan breathed, and Joshua smiled.

“Yeah, I do. You and your stupid rice pudding.”

“Me and my stupid rice pudding love you back.”

Needless to say, the pair avoided cooking (specifically anything involving rice OR pudding) for a long time afterwards.
 

 hello all i missed writing fluffy jihan so here i am~