“What’re you doing last night? Did you even sleep?” that is the first thing TOP hyung asks me in the morning when I was walking to the table for breakfast. The other hyung look at me but not him. Dear tears, please be good.

“Were you studying till late night? But you’re not home last night.” Youngbae hyung looks at me, “Oo? Where were you last night?” he asks me. Daesung hyung just smile at me because he knows why my eyes are swollen. He might not know why, but he knows who.

“I was going out with Dami noona.” I say and reach for the toast. “You mean you’re clubbing with her.” TOP says and he seems to be displeased. Why? Is there anything wrong? What did I do? “Were you having fun? I guess yes. The picture says so.” TOP hyung adds.

I frown, waiting for explanation. “Dami noona post your guys pictures last night.” Daesung hyung says. “by the way who is the guy next to you? he’s not from our school. Do we know him?” Daesung asks as he pours me some hot chocolate. “Joon. Noona’s friend.” I say, make it simple as possible. I don’t want to recall about how uncomfortable I was when I’m with Joon last night.

TOP hyung eyes on me. as if want me to elaborate more. But I have nothing to add. “He must be someone to you when you let him to take picture with you like that.” I want to ask what he means by but our eyes on Jiyong when he suddenly stand and take his beg. “We’re late.”

*

I try not to think why Jiyong hyung is so cold to me. why should I care?!

He now is busy with Sonia. It’s not like they’re dating or what. They have some discussion for their assignment. And, they happen to be in the same group.

That make, our gap become bigger. We’re getting awkward. I have to admit that sometimes, I’m the one who avoid from talking to him.

Can I go back to the night I ignore him? Because I want to explain everything to him. I want to tell him that I don’t even know Joon aside of his name. and I was just sitting there, waiting for Dami to done with her dance. And hoping at some point he will came with the other hyung.

I’m try to distract myself with my assignments and other project. I listen to music while doing them, when Hanbin comes in front me. I stop my playlist. “Can you help me with this?” He says and l smiles at him. “Of course I can.” I whisper to him. We’re at the library, so, yeah..

Hanbin is my coursemate, though he is younger than me. I’m his senior. I start with asking few basic questions, to see what he doesn’t understand.

“Do you join any club sunbae?” he asks me as we walk. we had done with the discussion and now we’re on way back. “I join the athlete club. Why?” I ask him back. I joined it because Jiyong hyung say he loves to see me running. Don’t call me silly, because I like it when he looks at me.

“Nothing. I just want to know about sunbae, since the other lecturer always mentions your name. I really look up to you. you must look good running, aren’t you? you must be one of the sprinter!”

I laugh. I don’t know why, but I find his words funny. He looks puzzle. I calm myself down, “You’re funny! Anyone look good in whatever they do.” He smiles shyly at my words. He suddenly bows to somenone, “Hello sunbae.”

I didn’t manage to turn around when ‘sunbae’ drags me. oh, it’s Jiyong. I wave to Hanbin and say good bye. Jiyong hyung push me into the car.

When he gets in the car, he looks at me as if he wants to eat me. and he look so angry. What did I do wrong this time? I did chat him, saying that I’m going to be late today. I don’t think it necessary but I still do it.

He comes near me and I move back a bit though there no enough space in his car. He buckles the seat belt for me. “Why did you do that? it’s hurt baby.” He says and I notice he clenches on the steering. He steps on the gas, and I can’t help myself from not looking at him. I’m so confuses right now.

“Hyung.. where’re we going? This is not the way home.” I say as I notice he takes the other turn opposite to the suppose one. He says nothing, it becomes more awkward. You know, to be in the same car with someone that you rarely talk almost a month though you’re living with him. All you do was nodding to one another. Plus, your last encounter you gave him bad impressions, which result awkward situation right now.

“Hyung…” I try, but he gives no response. Ok. I give up and sit there quietly.

*

He takes my hand and walks to the elevator. I’m not sure where this is, but I think, this is one of a condominium building, or is it hotel? What’re we doing here? His hand grips me tight and when I look at it, our hands, they intertwine. It fits perfectly, they stick together as if don’t want any other thing come between.

We reach the 18th floor and walks to door 1812. Jiyong hyung enters the password. Whose house is this? Sonia? I don’t want to witness any sweet moment between them. Not now. Not ever.

“Hyung, where’re we?” I try my luck to ask him though he doesn’t speak to me the whole journey. He smirks at my question before pushes me into the house.

“Our home.”

The house is so beautiful. It has mix of vintage and modern. I did think red can’t be mix with vintage, but somehow, this house proof it’s wrong. It gives out mix of young and classic vibes. It has kitchen islands but it not as big as at TOP hyung house. I guess there are two rooms.

He brings me to seat on the couch. Is this hyung house? is he planning to move out? He’s in his final year, so, maybe he has his own plan. Who will he stay with? Sonia? Why he brings me here if all this belong to Sonia? Do I have to give my opinions after this?

“Why’re you frowning?” Jiyong hyung caress my cheek. I look at him. Just ask me hyung, so that I can go now. ask me. before my tears fall. Please.

He lets go my hand before pull my waist to be closer to him. His other hand hold my hand that he lets go just now. can we stop the time here? He pulls my head to rest on his chest. I can hear his heartbeat. It feels so comfortable to be with him like this.

“Do you like the deco? Are you comfortable with it?” he asks me. I look at our hands. I want to cry. His action is confusing me. Why he asks me something that other person don’t like. I like this house so much especially the deco but why should I say so when I’m not the one who will stay here?!

I bury my head on his stomach. He pulls my head, does he hate it when I lay on his stomach?! “Move in with me.” he says when I meet his eyes.

I blink repeatedly. “What?” He asks me. seriously. Is he asking me to move in with him? Living together? He and me? “What did you just say?” I ask him.

“Move in with me. Here.” I sit straight. Waiting for any further explanation. “Here?” I ask again. “Yes, here. but we’re not moving now. after we finish the final. Then, we move in. that’s why I ask do you like the deco? We have few weeks before move in. you might want to change this and that.”

I am blank. I can’t process any yet. What I know is he’s hugging me and I smile as I hide my face at the nape of his neck. “I can’t wait.” He says softly.

Is he serious? But, why me? is this some prank that he and the other hyung do to me? is..

His phone rings. I look at the caller ID and reality hits me. “Hello, Sonia? What is it?” hyung asks and the caller says something. Hyung frowns, what is it? I tighten my grips on hyung clothes. I don’t know what they’re talking about because I choose to ignore it. I lay my head on Jiyong hyung chest and pray that my tear will not fall now.

“Baby I got to go.” He says. Ooh? Has the call ended? He looks at me and I can see he looks guilty.

“Can’t you stay?” I say. Honestly me myself shock it when I say that. I can say it. I can beg. I can do anything as long he’s not going to that girl. Not when we have this time to ourselves. A big no!

“I’m just go for a while. You, stay here. don’t go anywhere. Wait for me. ok?” Jiyong smiles as he caresses my cheek. He kisses my forehead.

Ohh? Now I’m alone here. what should I do? I still shock with all this. I can’t even move. I feel cold. Oh no! I know this cold. No! my eyes getting blurry.

Many thought come through my mind and the top is, what if, Jiyong hyung just practising his dialogue? What if, he means to say those to Sonia? Is he going to Sonia to say what he just say to me just now?

I feel so ashamed. He must be disgust on me. he must know by now, that I have feeling for him. No! I can’t have him feel disgusting on me.

But, was he just playing with me? is this really just a joke?

*

The music bang loudly but it still can’t make me forget that Jiyong left me. I’m in the club. Alone. After Jiyong left me, I took a taxi without knowing where to go. I’m not going home, not now. What I know, I’m at the club right now. I want to forget the pain being played by my own best friend.

! It’s hurt. Really hurt when I think about it. Will Sonia accept his idea to move in together? She should, if she dares to hurt Jiyong! I’ll..

Why do I even care!

“Yoo! Seungri! Where is Jiyong?” Now, who is this?! Oh! It’s Dami noona. “Hello noona. No. he’s not coming. He’s busy with some other girl.” I say.

“Seriously? Where’s the other?” She asks again. I shake my head to her question. “What?! You’re alone. In club? Does Jiyong knows this?” I choose to ignore the question and let her makes her own assumption.

“I’m going to dance.” I say. I don’t know how to dance but I guess this is the only way to distract myself from Jiyong. My body goes along with the music. I don’t care if people laugh at me.

Suddenly a pair of hand wrap around me. I struggle to free myself from that person. It’s Joon. Dami noona friend, I shouldn’t be rude right? “Hello.” I shout at him, try to make him hear me because the music is too loud.

“Are you alone?” He asks me and I nod. I was about to go to the bar when he grips my hand. It’s tight. And it’s hurt me. why do I have bad feeling about this?

“Let’s get some privacy.” He whispers softly but it makes me shiver. Oh no! This is not good.

He walks me up to one of the VIP’s room. He tells me to sit as he pours drinks for us. He gives me one of the glasses. Should I drink it? “Let’s make a toast.” He says. “One what occasion?” I said and he smiles, “For meeting you again. I was looking forward to meet you because I find you’re interesting.”

He clinks his glass with mine and drinks. His eyes on me and it make me insure that I drink the wine he gave.

He touches my arm, try to bring me closer. My eyes wide open at his action, “What’re you doing?” I push him. Am I being rude? He is Dami noona friend.

“You really interesting. I like it. It turns me on.” He says and on cue I run to the door but he much faster than me. He grabs me and pushes me to the couch.

I feel dizzy. Is this because of the wine? Now I know why Jiyong never let me drink. Ohh..Jiyong. I need him. Aren’t I’m the one who want to forget him? Now I’m begging for him to come.

Jiyong…

Joon caresses my face but it doesn’t make me feel warm as Jiyong does. It makes me disgusted and I know, I have tears running down my face right now.

He runs his fingers through my hair. It makes me have flashback how much Jiyong like when I play his hair. He traces my eyes and forces me to look him in eyes. What I see is all lust.

I miss looking at Jiyong soft eyes that can calm me down. Jiyong. Can you hear me?

Joon pins his body with mine and make me hard to breathe. I can do nothing because I feel so dizzy. My eyes getting blurry. It’s becomes black. No Seungri! You can’t blackout right now. you must fight. At least for Jiyong. Fight!

I try to push Joon harder with Jiyong in my mind. Jiyong is waiting for me. but, where is Jiyong?

But, Jiyong is with Sonia. He doesn’t need me anymore, and I guess what happen to me now has nothing to do with him. So, does it means I can just let this happen? Maybe I should just let Joon to do whatever. But, Jiyong…

All of sudden I can breathe. I try to find why, I see he been punches by Jiyong. Jiyong kicks him with TOP hyung and Youngbae hyung hold Joon not to fall. Daesung comes to me and hugs me. am I shivering?

All I can see there’s anger in Jiyong eyes. He punches Joon non-stop. “Hyung stop..” I say weakly but he still doesn’t stop. “Hyung..” I plead. “Jiyong, stop! You might kill him!” I shout to him as I stand before I fall again on the couch.

“I don’t give a if he dies! He touches you! nobody touch what’s mine!” He says sternly as he kneels in front me. He tries to touch me but I nudges. “Baby..”

“Shut up! Stop it! just stop playing with my heart! Stop calling me with name like I’m precious! When you have no feeling on me! just stop it hyung!” I shout to him and he looks so shocked. I don’t know where I get the guts, but I guess the wine help me. I think I should thanks Joon in future.

Where is Joon? Where did TOP hyung and Youngbae hyung bring him? Where is Daesung hyung? When did he get out?

“Stop confusing me with your kindness. It’s hurt me when you give me hope and you smash it later on. You can just go to Sonia, because I’m tired of all of this. I’m so tired of worrying where’re you, what you’re doing with her, why you come home late.. I’m just tired. I’ll stop liking you.” I plead to him with tears stream down my face.

I expect him to say something. Just anything but no, he hugs me. he can’t hug me, I’ll defeat. But I can’t push him away when his warm calm me. it makes me forget how much I’m scared just now.

“You’re shivering, baby.” He kisses the top of my head.

*

I feel dizzy and hot. Something is around my waist. I try to open my eyes but the light make me more dizzy. I groan and the thing around my waist been remove.

“Have you wake up?” it’s Jiyong. He caresses my face, “Hey, morning baby.” I open my eyes and I was shocked when we’re so close to each other. His leg tangles with mine.

How did we end up in like this? The flashback of last night incident comes in my mind. didn’t we fighting?

“I need to go.” I say and try to get up but he holds me down. it’s hard for me to get up. “No you don’t. where’re you going?” he says. “Class. I got class today.” I state the obvious.

“not in weekend baby.” Oh? Was yesterday was Friday? “I have some group discussion. You know, final is around the corner.” But he ignores my excuses by lay his head on my stomach.

There is silent between us. It’s a comfortable silent. but I need to end this before.. I can’t stop.. I need to put an end to all this.

I clear my throat, “Ermm, hyung. I mean it.” he looks up at me, maybe waiting for some explanation. “I mean about I’ll stop liking you. I’m sorry if you find it disgusting because I like you.” he says nothing but he looks he’s in horror. He looks scared.

“I’ll move out after final. If you want, I’ll move back to London. I’ll stop..” Jiyong kisses me hard. His hands hold me, he forces me to open my mouth. The kiss is so rough and hard. I try to pushes him but his hold much tighter.

We both breathless, “Don’t you ever dare to stop like me. don’t ever thinking of running away from me. don’t stop obsess on me. just don’t. you’re mine.”

“Hyung, stop it, will you? can’t you see you’re hurting me? just stop with your pranks. you have got yourself Sonia. Please, stop giving me hope. I’ll pay on your behalf for the bet.” I get up from the bed but Jiyong flips me on the bed.

He’s on top of me, “You love me idiot.” I roll my eyes at his words, “Yes, I am but you’re not so can you please stop doing this?” I push him but he kisses me again. A peck actually. “So do I. I love you baby.”

What? What did he say? What?! Did I just confess? And did he just say that he loves me? for real? Am I dreaming?

I froze, “Stop making that face, it makes me feel like kissing you more.” He says but I say nothing. I’m in shock. “Do you think that I’ll ask other people opinions for my house? do you think I care on what they say?”

I shake my head, “so, why do I ask you?” he chuckles when I still quiet. He lays next to me before hugs me. I rest my head on his chest, I don’t know why, but I feel comfortable.

“Because it is our home. I need you to be happy to stay with me. I thought I had told you this is our home.” he says. He runs his fingers through my hair and that make me remember Joon. I hug him tighter. “Why?” he asks me softly. I just shake my head.

“Tell me.” I look up at him, “Joon.” At the mention of the name I can feel his hand around me become tighter too. “Just don’t go around alone like that. just don’t go every without me. ok?” he’s furrowing his eyebrows. “But you’re the one who busy with other person.” I mumbles.

I thought he can’t hear it but he suddenly laugh. I look at him, “So you’re complaining? Are you jealous baby? Because I like it. it means no one else in your mine except me.” he says. He is psychotic.

Then, there is silent. “Baby, I’m sorry for not confessing to you my feeling. I thought action speak louder than words.

TOP hyung bets that I’ll never fall in love with Sonia because he knows my feeling on you. He told me to control because I’m getting obvious day to day that I have feeling for you.” I’m shock, no wonder TOP hyung seems displease when he saw my picture with Joon.

He reaches for my hand and intertwines them. “I was busy with the group assignment with Sonia and little that I know you’re jealous on her. I need to focus because this is my final year. Besides, I also busy designing the decorations for our house. I’m sorry for being late and make you waiting. We always caught up with the time.

I was so angry when I saw your picture with Joon arm around your shoulder. You don’t know how much I want to rip them. I’m angry at you when you’re not telling me the whole picture why you’re at the club. I thought you in relationship with him. I’m sorry for ignoring you, I’m such an idiot. That whole month teaches me how much I need you. I miss you.

I was so happy yesterday when they called me telling me that they had complete decorating. But when I reached school, you’re laughing with whoever. It’s been so long you’re not laughing like that when you around me. you keep avoiding me. you hurt me when you avoid my touch. I thought we’re fine after I told you that I want to move in with you.

But you’re gone when I came home. I called you, but you’re not answering, I called the other, in case you’re with them. Then, Dami called me saying that you’re at the club. I was so nervous when I can’t find you last night. It’s killing me. to see you in that situation was a nightmare. I don’t want to rewind it. so, please don’t do that again.”

I’m stunned with his explanation, I can hear he is stuttering. I look up at him and I see his tears. Is it real? “I’m sorry.” I say as I hug him. “But you go to Sonia when I beg you not to.”

“Baby please, believe me. I have nothing with Sonia. We got problems with our assignment. She can’t find it when she wants to check before submission. I went to her and fix her laptop before we find the work. I was so happy going home but you’re not there.”

“I’m an idiot, so you need to tell me directly. I’m sorry. I’m such an idiot for making such assumption and not realising that you love me too.” I say softly. He cups my face, “No, I am. I don’t know that you’re hurt when I’m busy with Sonia.”

“No, we’re idiots for not confessing.” I say and I believe I’m smiling. “My idiot.” We laugh and he looks deep into my eyes.

“I really love you. I really love you baby. Don’t do that to me again. You can’t imagine how much it hurts me. I want you to tell me if there anything wrong. I will fix it. just don’t give up on me. and baby please.. don’t love any other guy. If it possible don’t let them even come near you.”

“I'm sorry and I promise that I won’t give up on you. We will fix it, if there anything wrong. Together. I can promise you that, but to not love another guy, we’ll see it.” I act as if I’m thinking. He frowns at me.

“you know,” I put my hands around his neck. He still waiting for me to continue.

“It depends, who know I’ll find someone more handsome than you. more charming, more…” I but he kisses me before I can finish.

“Don’t try me baby.” He says and I can feel he’s smiling when his kisses trail to my neck. I close my eyes when I feel he bites my neck, I’m sure there will be hickey. Idiot!

But, he is my idiot. And I.. am his idiot.

 

 

That's the end. thank you to all those who read my story. to those who subscribe,comment,upvote and for those who are the silent readers, thank you so much. i do really hope that you're enjoy reading my story. till the next time.. :)

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