Yerin both dreaded and anticipated Potions nowadays.

This was because it meant she would see SinB. SinB who, against all thoughts of reason, Yerin missed so much. She dreaded Potions because SinB wouldn’t even look at her, like Yerin didn’t even exist, while Yerin spent most of class sneaking looks at her. At the same time, she anticipated because Potions was the only chance Yerin ever got to see SinB now.

If you had told Yerin at the start of school that she would miss SinB’s flirting and banter and insults, Yerin would’ve taken you to the hospital wing. Now? Yerin couldn’t help but feel a sense of loss. SinB was still kind of an , but there was something more to her that had Yerin yearning to talk to her.

Since that night she’d run into SinB in the halls and that day where Yuju had scolded her and Sowon, Yerin had taken to thinking more about SinB. She wondered just who SinB was. She wondered if SinB was every bit Yerin had seen then who was SinB as whole. Yerin wanted to know now, desperately so. The thing was, Yerin thought, when she did figure out who SinB was, would Yerin accept her?

Resolving to try and talk to SinB today, Yerin took her seat for Potions fifteen minutes early. As it got closer to class time, more people trickled in, but there was no SinB. When Professor Jung started class, the seat next to Yerin was still empty.

Worry tugged at Yerin’s nerves as she sat through class, fighting the urge to leave and look for SinB. There was a list of reasonable excuses for SinB missing. She could’ve been feeling ill, she might’ve overslept, she could’ve just skipped. However, Yerin couldn’t help the sinking feeling that weighed her down. The feeling only worsened when she chanced a look over her shoulder and saw Eunha wasn’t in class either.

Yerin met Sowon’s gaze. After a brief moment of silent communication, they nodded. They’d discuss this after class. This proved to be easier said than done. While Potions has never been Yerin’s favorite class, she always found it moderately interesting. However, today Yerin couldn’t bring herself to focus on a single word Professor Jung said.

Yerin was so distracted that she didn’t even notice when Professor Jung dismissed class. She was still staring at her blank sheet of parchment when Sowon walked over and shook her shoulder. Yerin startled and fumbled with putting her things up, ignoring the worried look Sowon gave her.

Once they were in the hall, Sowon pulled Yerin to the side. Yerin saw the way Sowon’s eyebrows were knitted together, the way they did when she was particularly anxious. Apparently the bad feeling Yerin had wasn’t just her.

“Do you know why they weren’t in class?” Sowon asked, voice hushed like they were talking about something secretive. Maybe it was a secret. Yerin wasn’t really sure anymore.

Yerin shook her head. “I have no idea, and we don’t have any more classes with them until our next Potions class.”

“Do you think–” Sowon stopped herself short, eyebrows furrowing even more if possible. “Do you think something happened to them because of the paralyzed students?”

Although it had crossed Yerin’s mind, Sowon having the same fear as her just made Yerin nervous. “We’ll look for them later,” Yerin suggested. “If we don’t see them even after dinner is over, we’ll look.”

Sowon agreed, but she still looked like she wanted to go looking now. Yerin wanted to as well, but she knew it would be suspicious for her and Sowon to just disappear in the middle of the school day. Not to mention, they were far more likely to get caught during the day. So instead, Yerin and Sowon went through the rest of their day, paying little attention to what was going on around them.

Yerin knew she should feel guilty, but what if something really had happened to SinB and Eunha?

After dinner, Sowon went ahead to wait outside the Slytherin dorms while Yerin lingered inside the Great Hall. People continued to walk by her, but there was no sight of the one person Yerin wanted to see. Yerin sighed and turned to grab Sowon and herself some tarts to sulk over. Just as Yerin did so, she saw out of the corner of her eye a flash of unmistakable hair.

Without thinking, Yerin dropped the tarts and followed SinB into the hall.

“SinB!” Yerin called as she chased after her down the empty hall.

SinB slowed to a stop, allowing for Yerin to catch up to her. She was carrying a bag full of food in one hand and a blanket in the other. When SinB turned to face her, Yerin felt small gasp escape her lips.

Over a month ago, Yerin had thought she’d seen SinB at her worst during that trip to Hogsmeade, but that couldn’t compare to what Yerin saw now. SinB before had been tired but still lively enough to crack jokes. The SinB in front of Yerin looked dead, not the tired she was at Hogsmeade but a sense of devastation and hopelessness enveloped her instead.

“SinB,” Yerin whispered, scared if she spoke any louder that SinB would shatter. “What happened?”

Yerin always thought SinB was so good at her masks, but she felt her heart break as SinB’s carefully composed expression crumbled into sorrow. “Umji…” SinB could barely say. “She’s been paralyzed.” SinB looked away hastily as tears fell onto her cheeks.

Without thinking, Yerin hugged SinB. SinB stiffened for a moment before collapsing into the hug, muffling her cries into Yerin’s shoulder. Yerin hugged her tightly, rubbing soothing circles on SinB’s back as she cried. There was no telling how long they stood there, but Yerin felt like she could’ve stayed there for years. Yerin had wondered if SinB was human, but she never wanted confirmation in the form of something so tragic.

When she was done, SinB pulled away, wiping away her tears and avoiding eye contact. “I thought you hated me,” SinB mumbled.

“I thought so too,” Yerin replied with a helpless shrug, “but now I’m not so sure.” She looked to the bag of food and blanket that SinB had dropped while crying. Hesitantly, she bent down and scooped them into her arms. When SinB tried to grab them from her, Yerin took a step back. “Are you going to the hospital wing?”

Confused, SinB just nodded. The she frowned and explained, “Eunha and I have been sitting with Umji. I only came to grab food for us and an extra blanket for the night.”

“Let me carry these for you.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Let me,” Yerin insisted softly, “please.”

After a moment of silence, SinB nodded. She walked in the direction of the hospital wing, and Yerin followed after her dutifully. Even without seeing SinB’s face, it’s impossible not to notice the harsh air of misery surrounding her. Yerin felt like she should say something, but she didn’t know what so she stayed silent.

The hospital wing was dimly lit, and the nurse was out. There were lines of beds, most of them empty. However, there was a part sectioned off by curtains and with a lurch of nausea, Yerin realized that was where the paralyzed students were. She ignored the churning of her stomach and followed SinB to the back left corner of the room. This was also blocked off by curtains, but when SinB drew them back, Yerin was relieved to see the bed was cut off on all sides, preventing them from seeing the other paralyzed students.

SinB took the things from Yerin’s arms, and Yerin would’ve helped her but she was too busy staring at Umji. Yerin didn’t know Umji well. All she knew was that she was SinB and Eunha’s friend as well as Yuju’s new friend. From the few interactions Yerin had with her, Umji had been quiet but still a bright person. Now, she was still and deathly pale as she laid in bed.

Yerin tore her gaze away from Umji to see Eunha fast asleep in a chair next to the bed. Eunha was hunched over, her head cushioned by her arms that were folded on top of the bed. She looked peaceful as she left but every so often her face wrinkled like she remembered where she was.

“Sit.”

Yerin blinked in surprise, not having noticed SinB pulling over two more chairs for them. She sat down without question and watched as SinB draped a blanket over Eunha’s shoulder and ran a hand down Umji’s arm, fingers trembling. Yerin pretended not to see that and looked down at her hands. She was surprised once more by a soft blanket landing in her lap. Yerin looked up at SinB questioningly, but SinB ignored her and simply sat in the chair beside her.

They sat there in silence, and as time passed, Yerin felt herself getting sleepy. Her eyes fluttered open and shut, and she had to stifle a yawn. She snuck a glance at SinB to find her already watching her. Yerin flushed and quickly averted her eyes.

Yerin was debating on excusing herself when SinB said, “Umji was the one who came up with the name SinB.”

Yerin waited for SinB to continue, but when she didn’t, Yerin asked, “How did she make it?”

“It means mystery,” SinB explained softly. “She said it suited me. I was a mystery to her at first. This strange Slytherin who had no business saving the weird prodigy from a bunch of bullies.”

Yerin was surprised to hear that was how they met but also grimaced at the mention of Umji being bullied. She couldn’t help but wonder if she could’ve been one of those bullies once upon a time. Rather than going down that road of distressing thought, Yerin asked SinB a question she’d been wondering since she heard of her.

“Why did you change your name?” Yerin asked. “What was wrong with Eunbi?”

SinB didn’t say anything for a long moment, and Yerin feared she’d gone too far. She opened to apologize, but SinB cut her off with a dry, humorless laugh. Yerin looked to SinB, surprised. SinB was slouched in the chair and curled in on herself, eyes glazed over and staring in Umji and Eunha’s direction.

“Hwang Eunbi was a scared eleven year-old who couldn’t defend herself,” SinB said blankly, like she was reciting something from memory. “SinB was someone who was tough enough to hurt others before they could hurt her. I changed my name because I could never hurt others as Eunbi, and I convinced myself it wasn’t really me if I was called SinB.”

Yerin carefully crafted her response and replied, “I want you to know I’m not attacking you. I’m just trying to understand. Was it really necessary for you to attack others first?”

“It was necessary,” SinB said and turned to meet Yerin’s gaze. She looked lost, like a kid who lost her parent in a crowded place. Yerin tentatively reached out and was surprised when SinB met her halfway to hold hands. “My mother cried when I wrote her that I’d been sorted into Slytherin. She’d been a Hufflepuff when she attended, and my father a Ravenclaw, but it’s wasn’t that she was disappointed. Rather… She was afraid for me.”

SinB looked away from Yerin but held her hand tightly as she continued, “She was so worried about the prejudice that I’d face from being in a house known for producing ‘evil’ witches and wizards. Because of that, I never told her about school. Of course, I write her about grades and quidditch, but I never dare tell her about how people avoid me in the halls, how people call me all sorts of nasty things, and how in my third year, someone hexed my broom before a quidditch game, making me break my leg when my broom threw me off from thirty meters in the air.” SinB regarded Yerin seriously and said, “Imagine being so threatened by a thirteen year-old that you had to break her leg. To this day, my mom still thinks I broke my leg while helping Hagrid with some creatures. So yeah, I’d say me attacking first is necessary.”

“I’m sorry,” was all Yerin could think to say.

She hadn’t expected a response, so when SinB sadly said, “I know,” Yerin felt like the tiest person in the world. All Yerin could do then was hold SinB’s hand as they sat by Umji and Eunha.