Chapter Six

“Surprise!”

As cliché as it sounded, they were indeed doing a surprise party – which wasn’t really a surprise after Jongdae’s revelation – and it was quite embarrassing to see Mistress Park dressed in a somewhat ridiculous costume. Youngji bit her lips in order to prevent herself from laughing at the sight of Mistress Park struggling to walk towards her while efficiently avoiding from stepping on her lengthy skirt.

She casted a quick glance at Chanyeol, managing to witness the blush creeping on his cheeks. Somewhere inside her, she was really relieved to see that. When Youngji and Chanyeol were young, their mothers used to plan and organize birthday parties for the both of them. Chanyeol would usually feel really embarrassed because Mistress Park always chose the most outstanding dress – in a bad way. It seemed like nothing had really changed, because Youngji could see that Chanyeol was dying to disappear from the space and Mistress Park was gleeful in her Elsa dress.

“Blow the candle!” everyone chanted when Mistress Park arrived in front of her, holding a medium-sized cake on her hands.

She blew the candles, a smile plastered on her face as everyone was applauding. She didn’t know if the applause was genuine or otherwise, but she would like to keep herself composed in front of Mistress Park so she kept herself from thinking too much. It was a celebration meant for her, and even though she was quite opposed of it, it didn’t seem right for her to act like a brat and be all gloomy and sulky. What would Mistress Park think? That poor lady would probably be displeased and label her as an impolite individual.

“Welcome,” a voice whispered into her ear, and she was shocked that she immediately turned to the direction of the voice.

It was Jongdae, of course.

She replied with a smile, and he gave a light squeeze on her cheeks. Her eyes widened at the unexpected act, but she didn’t dodge it or push his hand away. She just simply stared into his eyes, trying to comprehend the meaning behind his randomness. She regretted it as soon as she reached the barrier though, because she saw guilt.

Jongdae broke the eye-contact. “Sorry for ruining the surprise.”

“It’s fine,” she said, eyes immediately searching for the person who was wearing a bright blue dress: Mistress Park. Mistress Park’s dress alone was enough to astonish her. “I hope that you’ll enjoy this party.”

“I guess I will,” Jongdae said. Like the automatic navigator planted on his heart, he was quick to find Chanyeol’s figure among the small crowd. “I’m not sure, though.”

Youngji knew that she needed to do something about this Jongdae-Chanyeol situation. “Jongdae –“

“I’m sorry.”

She blinked her eyes. “What? I mean – what are you sorry for?’

Jongdae was miserable, but he figured out that as long as he kept his lips sealed, no damage would be done. “I’m so sorry because” – his eyes lingered around the house, and the he found Joonmyeon – “I’m gonna accompany Joonmyeon now. He seems to be lonely,” he said, and then he ended it with a wink which Youngji found to be terrorizing. “I’m sorry that I have to leave you.”

He gave a playful salute at her before he approached Joonmyeon and pulled the guy towards the balcony. Youngji felt uneasy looking at them, but she didn’t dare to cross the boundaries she had set for herself. Though, she got a feeling that she would regret the fact that she was neglecting the fact that she was actually doing something bad to fulfil her own aim.

Jongdae wasn’t just merely an acquaintance of hers anymore, because the moment she decided that she needed to save her image, he got turned into a victim. She assured herself that it wasn’t her problem that Jongdae was ruining his own chance, but she still couldn’t help but to feel something heavy on her shoulders.

He wasn’t sure if his grip on Joonmyeon’s wrist was too strong or too rough, because he was too busy distracting his thoughts. It was only when Joonmyeon whimpered and forcefully pulled his hand away from him that he realized that he was far too distracted.

Joonmyeon rubbed his wrist slowly while frowning. It really hurt a lot. “That hurts a lot,” he complained, giving Jongdae a glare. “Come on – tell me what’s wrong.”

Jongdae sighed while leaning his back against the fence. The wind was quite strong today, and he was happy that he got his jacket to cover his body. From the balcony, the colourful lights of Seoul could be seen. It was beautiful. He thought that it was somewhat fascinating that even at this time of the day, people were still awake and doing their own things. When he put it that way, he suddenly missed to join in the liveliness.

“Nothing,” he replied, voice came sounding hoarse. “Just stuffs.”

“What stuff? Is it about the girl?”

“Youngji? Actually –“

“Are you afraid that she’ll tell your friends about what she saw the day before?” Joonmyeon inquired.

Jongdae didn’t give an immediate reply, and he was singing along to a song instead. His voice was small, and he liked the feeling of the wind bringing the sound of his voice to somewhere else. “She hasn’t told anyone yet; I got a feeling that she’s not even interested to speak about it.” He looked at Joonmyeon who was looking monotonous, arms resting on the fence. “I told her about Chanyeol.”

Joonmyeon’s shoulders were immediately tensed. “Seriously?”

“Yeah.”

“Isn’t she’s like living in this house together with Chanyeol?”

“That’s true.”

Joonmyeon grunted. “Are you dumb?”

“That’s a really hurtful accusation.”

“,” Joonmyeon muttered in displeasure. “You’ve been trying to hide that even from your roommates, and now you easily told a person who you don’t even know that well about it. That’s like an insult to your endurance of two years.”

“She seems to be a good person.”

“And a good person doesn’t commit mistakes?”

“See,” Jongdae said, “’mistakes’ and ‘purposely’ are two different things. I don’t know, but she’s really trustworthy. If she wasn’t, then she would have told Chanyeol about it like a long time ago.”

“Do you like her?”

“Funny but no – my heart’s only for Chanyeol.”

“You really need to stop saying stupid stuffs like that,” Joonmyeon retorted. “It’s only a question, so don’t get all too worked out.”

Jongdae laughed heartedly while giving several playful punches on Joonmyeon’s arm. “I feel good around her, though. Because she’s just like Chanyeol. Her mannerism, the way she talks, her personality, that certain stiffness and the calmness she possesses. Everything is almost the same that sometimes, I forgot that I was talking to her, and not Chanyeol.”

“Does that mean that you like her?”

“I just answered that like a few seconds ago.”

“As your best friend and your buddy, I have the obligation to interrogate you until the truth is spilled.”

“Don’t be so harsh,” Jongdae replied coldly.

Joonmyeon feigned a shocked expression, both hands pressed against his cheeks. “Where’s my Jongdae?” He shook his head while curling up his lips. “You are far too into this. You need to go back.”

“I won’t,” he whispered. He gazed at the colourful lights, witnessing at how several of them were turned off, leaving that certain spot to be dark.

“I didn’t actually think that you would make it this far,” Joonmyeon said, using the same tone as Jongdae. “Sometimes, it’s hard to call you my best friend anymore. You feel so foreign.”

“I won’t go back,” Jongdae said, and Joonmyeon immediately knew that the words were meant to himself – not Joonmyeon, not anyone, but ‘Jongdae’. “Because it will hurt a lot.”

It was dark now.

She saw Joonmyeon approaching Sehun, talking a bit about something before Sehun gestured for Joonmyeon to follow him. Sehun grabbed his bag, eyes wandering carefully around the house – and it was just on time when his eyes were about to meet Youngji’s, and she fortunately managed to pretend like she was immersed on doing another thing. Like enjoying the cheese cake, as an example.

From the corner of her eyes, she saw Sehun taking something out: liquors. She was immediately worried and then she averted her gaze at Mistress Park who was talking with Chanyeol. She hoped that the liquors were not meant to be consumed by anyone, because Mistress Park would be really enraged. The most Youngji could do to lessen the damage was to prevent Joonmyeon from giving it to anyone. Most of them were under-aged for God’s sake.

She stood up from her seat, happily leaving the overly creamy cheese cake and led her legs towards Joonmyeon. She saw him disappearing on his way towards the balcony, and she was about to go there as well – before a voice so familiar greeted her. She was lying if she said that she wasn’t taken aback by that – especially in this situation, when all of her old friends were here.

“Mom told me to talk to you,” Chanyeol explained. “I can’t say no.”

Youngji was about to make a clean escapade, but then she caught the focused stare from Mistress Park. She was wise enough to give up her attempt. “Well, I understand.”

A long silence followed after that, and Youngji kept looking worriedly at the balcony. It wasn’t Chanyeol or Mistress Park’s rage that was on her mind now – it was somebody and something else. If she was right, Jongdae was at the balcony. If Joonmyeon brought the liquors to the balcony, then that only meant that he was sharing it with Jongdae. Drinking at the balcony where you could fall over and end your life out of all places, she cursed mentally.   

“Jongdae and you look so close.”

Youngji raised a brow. “What made you think so?”

“You were talking to him before and” – he paused – “he did this thing on your cheeks. You see, this is not jealousy –“

“You don’t need to explain every single thing,” Youngji said. “There’s a reason why I – never mind.”

“Right,” he murmured. “There’s a reason why you graduated earlier than the rest of us.” He glanced at Youngji. “Because you’re smart; a genius.”

She grabbed a glass of orange juice from the nearest table and took a sip. It was sour.

“You’re not saying anything?”

“What do you expect me to say?” she asked.

“Jongdae’s a nice guy,” he randomly blurted out, and she almost spilled the juice from . When he saw that she was really surprised by that statement – it was obvious from the way she was desperately searching for a tissue – he offered her the tissue from his pocket. “But you see, I...”

She wiped her lips while looking at him. “You what?”

“It’s nothing,” he said, dismissing the topic. “He’ll tell you later if he wants to.” 

She hunched her shoulders. “I guess.” She saw Mister and Mistress Park retreating into their bedroom, and she was sure that she wasn’t hallucinating when she could hear the fireworks. “So,” she looked at Chanyeol, “this is the end of our conversation.”

“It is,” he replied.

“I can’t believe that you got drunk this easily.” Joonmyeon’s comment was that loud to reach Youngji’s hearing – and the others’ too, apparently. The only difference was, the others were still too pumped up to bother about anything else but their own matters. She was really shocked to see Chanyeol bringing up the action faster than her. Perhaps, there was fear too, because who knew if Jongdae’s tale about not being able to express his fondness of Chanyeol for two years was actually a myth.

But that wasn’t possible. Not Chanyeol. She knew that. There was something else – not the mutual feelings for Jongdae, for sure.

Joonmyeon was as equally as drunk as Jongdae, actually. Scratch that – they were just a bit tipsy, not drunk. They were even still capable of holding a civilized conversation – she overheard Jongdae talking about wanting to graduate with good grades. She wasn’t aware that she was smiling, until Chanyeol’s skin brushed past hers.

Chanyeol was about to step closer towards the guys, intending on sharing his thoughts. But Youngji was fast to pull his wrist, not forgetting to grip it tightly. In her eyes was ambivalence, and slight doubts, too. Perhaps there was the realization as well.

“Don’t,” she said, and he was immediately grounded on the floor, eyes sunken deeper and staring at her. He was confused, and was left wondering. “Not yet,” she added, and she wasn’t even thinking about how much she should avoid Chanyeol when she fidgeted with the hem of his shirt and brought him away from nearing the balcony.

If only she was braver.