Year 2006.

She was sitting quietly in the classroom as everyone was crowding around her desk as she was sitting beside Euna.

Just then, Mino came into the classroom as he smiled towards Euna but notices Hyerin sitting beside Euna. He walked over as the crowd was screaming out.

"You said you liked Jiyong Hyung, this an autograph from him." Mino smiled out as he handed her the album and Euna looked at him in surprise "You didn't have to really give Hyerin that album. I am also a fan of Jiyong oppa."

Well as usual, her jealously was there - online again. It seems like only she has to get the best and no one else should. The more Hyerin loved her as a friend, the more she would take advantage of Hyerin till there is nothing left for her. 

Hyerin once again handed the album to her "you can have it." But even without a thankful, Euna took it away from her and Mino looked at Hyerin; its your birthday gift babe. 

**

The long day ended and as usual, Hyerin accompanied Mino towards YGE for his training but this time round - it changes her fate forever. 

"Thanks babe for accompanying me for training." Mino brushed her hair and just as she was about to leave, she spotted Jiyong coming out of YGE and she paused her steps - Her beloved idol. 

"Hello Hyung." Mino called out as he bowed towards Jiyong, Seunghyun and Daesung as the 3 of them smiled and bowed as well. She was completely frozen as Jiyong smiles out to her, "Is she your girlfriend?" Jiyong teased Mino but Mino's reponse was always cold "she is not."

​​​​​​Till now she was still frozen on her steps but then Mino pushed her "Its Jiyong hyung. What are you doing? Say hi."

"Hi.. Hi." She was flustered as she quickly bowed down towards them. "Such a pretty girl." Daesung spoke out as Jiyong laughed "Stop flirting." And playful punch Daesung on his hands but now that she is looking at Jiyong, her heart was beating faster. 

"I am a fan of you Jiyong.... Can I get your signature?" Hyerin daring asked out and Jiyong smiled like a child and immediately agreed. Those days were the carefree days where no one needs to worry about the public eye nor fear would have happen if they were judged by the public. They were perfect and happier. 

"Yes sure, what's your name?" Jiyong asked out as she handed him their album as well as a marker, "Kim Hyerin" she smiled brightly as he signed the album with her name. After the sign, they were ready to leave but Hyerin passed him a letter that she has always carried with her and he gladly accepted it as he went away. 

**

"What did that fan girl gave you?" Seunghyun asked out as he took a cup of plain water from the kettle, "I have no idea." Jiyong responded back as he uses a pen knife to open up the letter. 

​​​​​​Hello Jiyong. 

You might or might not receive this letter... I have write and re write this letter for so many times that I couldn't even remember how many times I tried all over again. 

I want to thank you so much for being the pillar in my life, for being the light of my life. Throughout your debut... Even though it has only been a month old... You gave me so much hope. My life has always been tough and it will somehow just continue to be tough. 

​​​​​​There are times I really want to give up and walk away from everything... But Jiyong... You pulled me back. Your strength, your hope brings me back to life. I just want you to remember, when times gets harder, stay strong and I will always be there forever and I won't leave you no matter what happens. 

​​​​​​Love, 

Kim Hyerin (Your number fan girl)

He smiled as he completed the letter and placed it in his room whereby he would be able to see it all the time. Kim Hyerin, you just brighten up my day. 

 

Year 2017

"Princess." Jiyong called out in his sweet voice as he walked towards the entrance of dolce vita - where she is standing. "I am leaving Jiyong." She said as she walked towards her car but Jiyong was never planning to let her go. 

"Let's talk this out." as their eyes met and she immediately avoided the eye contact. "Baby please." Jiyong grabbed her wrist and felt her bandages. 

"! Why do you always have to do this!" Jiyong shouted out in anger and she glared at him and gave him one tight slap on his face. "Why I did this? You are ing asking me why I did this?" she screamed out and broke down into tears. 

"Why does it has to be Euna whom you cheated with! Why Jiyong, Why!" Hyerin screamed out even louder as she threw the stuff she brought for his parents on his face. 

"What the do you think I am Jiyong? I ing stayed with you all these damn bloody times but Park Euna comes in only at your highest peak! Are you ing blind Kwon Jiyong!"

She fell onto the ground as Jiyong carried her up and went into one of the rooms in the pension. She glared at him as her tears were still flowing down "Baby... I am so sorry. I was drunk and I..."

"Jiyong.. I can't take it anymore. I really can't-"

"No. I can't let you go." Jiyong looked at her; with his loving eyes. " you Kwon Jiyong." She slapped him again. 

"Slap me for all you want as long as you can stay by my side. I am willing to take the pain."

"You know what Ji..." Hyerin was crying so badly that she was now short of breath -"lets break up." The last sentence that she never thought she would be the one saying it.

"No no no no" he was pacing around the room with his hand brushing through his hair as she looked down on the floor "no baby no. It was a mistake. It was my fault. I am so sorry." Jiyong walked towards her and held onto her hands.

"I am so tired Jiyong. 5 damn years and I keep seeing you.. With some other women together, flirting, ing, affair. How many more chances do you want me to give you again?" Hyerin was still crying as Jiyong's hands is still intertwining with hers. 

"Last chance babe. I know I ruined this but don't leave me. I am so sorry but just don't." Jiyong was now on his knee's as she turned away to avoid looking at him. 

"I beg you... Don't leave me." Jiyong begged, cried and he knew he needed that one last chance from her. He stood up and hugged his crying girlfriend tightly "baby."

She broke the hug and looked at him face to face, "this is the last chance Jiyong.. It's really the last." As soon as she completed the sentence he kissed her on the lips and it felt like their love was back, but was it really back? 

**

​​​​​​The smell of a certain food woke her up from her sleep in the dolce vita pension, she turned towards her side and Jiyong was not there anymore. She sat up as she moved towards the drawer next to her with her bag in it and injected two kinds of medication. 

One is to cure her depression while the other one was to take her own life, a long term damage drug to her health. As soon as she completed her medication she tied up her hair and got off the bed and Jiyong was holding onto a tray into her room. 

"I cooked your favorite, bacon and ham and prepared a few side dishes." Jiyong smiled brightly as she smiled at him and walked over to the sofa to have her breakfast with him. 

​​​​​Somehow in the morning she was a little clingy to him, she was already lying down on his chest as her hands were holding onto Jiyong's arms. "What's wrong babe." Jiyong was brushing her hair gently as he kissed her forehead. 

"Nothing. I just had the feeling to hold onto your hands." She said as Jiyong asked out, "Did you took your medication?" If I said no, shouldn't I just have another shot in me and see what happens. Afterall, Jiyong is going to leave me and I won't survive it. 

"Not yet." She smiled as Jiyong went over to her bag and took out the normal medication she was taking and he gently injected the medication into her veins. 

​​​​​​Jiyong... Someday... Would it kill you if you ever knew that my death, my illness was all related to you? Would it kill you one day if you realize just how much pain you caused me....?

"When is your next appointment to the doctors?" Jiyong kissed her forehead once again as she was already eating the breakfast prepared by Jiyong. 

"I can go on my own. It's fine." Hyerin fed him with a piece of kimchi, "It's okay. I will accompany you over. I want to know how's your condition." Jiyong kissed her neck as she held onto his face "Ji, I am fine. Don't panic." What a lie. Just then Jiyong's phone rang and he took a peek on the messages and it was her - Park Euna. 

"Jiyong oppa.... I'm having a bad headache. My stomach hurts and I have no one to send me to the doctors, can you come along please?" Jiyong stared at the message for a moment while Hyerin looked at Jiyong's panic face, "Whose that?" she asked out as she put the kimchi into and Jiyong immediately locked his phone and Hyerin looked back at Jiyong, "You look really panic. Let me guess-"

She took out her phone and placed it on the table -"It must be.... Euna right." Her heart felt like a knife went through it but Jiyong knew that no matter what has happen he couldn't admit it because chances don't always come and it might just disappear when it happens, "No princess, don't worry." and she looked at him while he stood up from the sofa and took a towel from the chair, "Prepare up babe, I am sending you to meet the doctor later."

As he headed into the washroom to wash up he left his phone on the chair but she took a glance on the lock screen and it was "Park Euna." name on it and as expected she knew that it was her.. She sliently took a bottle of sleeping pills in her bag along with a few liquid drug substances and pour it into a glass cup and fill it up in red wine that was left in the fridge.

Before Jiyong came out of the washroom, she sat down on the sofa and drank the whole glass cup with all the substances enough to kill her, maybe I really just wanted Jiyong to feel a sense of gulit because of what he caused to me. Maybe, I am now finally scared that the fact.... Jiyong might leave me for Euna even after all I did.... yes, i requested for a break up but maybe I was also hoping for Jiyong to realize that he might really need me.

After drinking the whole cup that was enough to kill her, she sat the sofa for awhile while Jiyong was washing up in the bathroom as she is starting to lose conciousness on the sofa but it didn't took long till Jiyong came out of the bathroom, "Babe, are you ready?" but there was no response at all yet Jiyong found her lying down on the sofa with the glass cup shattered on the ground and there was empty sleeping pills bottle as well as other drugs substances.

 

 

 

(A/n: My apologies for a short-not-so-long update and I'm trying to do it on a daily basis! Love cha, hope you guys are still loving how this story is going. Time to time, each chapter for year 2006 onwards would get longer and the other matters will arise as it goes.)