When Jiyong looked into her eyes, it was the eyes he determined to himself that he would never cause it, the eyes full of sorrow. Now he did it, or something did it, and he blamed himself all for making her worry.

As much as he wanted to tell her that everything was going to be alright because he would do anything to take care of it, he felt like if he ever did tell, she would do something else. He was scared as if she was trying to find a way to run away from him, or maybe he was about to lose her. He knew it too much to know what was the price for being publicized, what was the price for being loved by too many people, and right now he couldn’t even have someone for himself. Was it the price for demanding so much love from people and he couldn’t give it all back, so he couldn’t have someone he loved?

He couldn’t say anything, his body moved close to her. Jiyong hugged her tight, put her in another embrace and closed his eyes. He just… didn’t want to answer. Maybe he just… didn’t want to accept that something was wrong.

“Kwon Jiyong..” She gasped in between their breathes, her body still felt his warmth under his embrace. “Say something.”

Jieun had lied to herself. She supposed that she wanted to know things, but she didn’t allow herself to comprehend the situation. In fact, she didn’t want to hear anything about these presentiments. Whether it was wrong or right, she just wanted the moment to last for a while. For a while, she meant, for-e-ver.

(Somehow, she was just still afraid of that word. So, in her mind, she replaced the word hoping it had the same meaning.)

In the end, Jieun never figured out what was wrong. She decided just to go with it, whether how bad it could be.

And Jiyong never really wanted the next day to come.

When Jieun still immersed herself with the books, Jiyong was just too tired. So, he suddenly grabbed her hand, pulling the girl to bed.

“What are you doing?” She seemed stunning, and shy, but still she followed his movement.

“Let’s go to bed.” Jiyong still didn’t look back at her, finding the way to her room since he was not too familiar with this place yet.

“You’re going to sleep here tonight?”

She was taken back when she saw his nod.

They never did this before. Sleeping together. He never stayed at her house, he’d rather left at midnight or he’d visit her for just several hours. Something unnatural happened like this made she worry. She’d always foreseen things so negatively, so she supposed all this thing looked like a last farewell scene.

“Wh..Why?” Jieun stood at the side of her bed while Jiyong was already on the bed.

But, Jiyong grinned.

“Why are you so serious? I’m not doing anything to you.” Jiyong, however, swallowed his saliva as if he was thinking of something else. “I just want to sleep next to you.”

“But…”

She was left unspoken when he pulled her over him with another embrace. Whenever he did this to her, Jieun felt like she was giving anything up. Sometimes, she wondered how powerful he was when he could do all of these things to her mind, to her heart and to her body. She could never reject him. Sometimes, Jieun was scared of the feeling of loving someone so much, but when she was with him, that fear somehow was just too similar to the feeling of happiness that she could not distinct it.

“Jieun ah…” Jiyong tucked a hair above her ear. “Please don’t look at me with those eyes again.”

“H..huh?” Did she look too obvious?

“You are still thinking if something is wrong right?” Jiyong took a deep sigh before continuing. “Your eyes, I hate it. It looks like you’re going to run away from me. Please, Jieun ah. Don’t ever think of running away from me. You can’t leave me. Even if something is wrong, I will fix it.”

It was not a surprise if he could look through her, she assumed.

“Do you trust me?” Jiyong put his fingers in between her fingers. “I’m going to protect you, no matter what happens.”

When he kissed her again, Jieun found herself crying, but not with sorrow. Somehow it was happiness. Why did such a dramatic line, which was always used in those fairytale Korean dramas to make the female flustered, now work with her when she never believed in those illusory ideas? She was surprised with herself, for opening her heart to let this man in. Why did she open her heart to him, she tried to remember the reason, but maybe she had already let him in since the very first encounter. Somehow, she just didn’t know that she did.

“I promised, didn’t I?”

And he saw her smiling again. He still would crave for that smile every day.

(It'd been a while that Jiyong had again found his peace of mind while sleeping.)

When Jieun suddenly opened her eyes, she found herself the only one in the room. It was only 5:00 A.M in the morning. And then, she found a note that he left behind.

“Morning lovely, I’m sorry I can’t be with you until morning. And you look so sound asleep (with some snoring) and I decide not to wake you up. (Somehow, I make a lot of noises while waking up and you’re still deep in sleep.) Have a nice day and see you soon, love.

Your Kwon Jiyong.”

And he ended it with a heart, to which Jieun chuckled. And when she tried to put the letter back to the counter, a small white box left there somehow intrigued her. When she opened it, guessing it was something left by him, a silver object caught her off guard.

Not too long after that, a small beam on her face appeared. It was an earring, not a pair, but only one earring.

(Jieun: What is this?

Jiyong: A gift

Jiyong: insert a sticker

Jieun: For what?

Jiyong: You know, that earring has more than the simple meaning.

Jiyong: It’s a mark. You’re mine.

Jieun: You’re so cheesy oppa

Jieun: Thank you Jiyongie)

When Jiyong found himself walking to the YG building on the same road that he used to wander around after work in those old days, he reminisced all of those years working hard and training hard to look forward to a present life. He wondered if he had achieved his goal, being so successful, living a life that he had always wanted, and he did put a goal like that. But, what he always hoped for his life was to find something made him happy, and at that time he had supposed living a luxurious life like now could make him happy.

But, he wondered if this kind of life would make him happy, or happy enough to achieve his goal. Maybe, he was too busy chasing his goal, and his goal slowly changed into something else, with the power and the greed of fame and money.

Jiyong admitted he did all of this, one part was because of the money, and the fame. Nobody didn’t want fame, and he was not the exception either. He knew it right beforehand that fame changed people, and when he stuck that to his goal, he hoped he wouldn’t change. Somehow, he did, but he supposed he didn’t.

There’d been things to regret during the time, but Jiyong tended to look forward instead of looking back. Because he knew, changing things in the past would not change what he was going to change in the future. So maybe one day, he supposed his goal would change again, and he supposed that he still had so many things to do. Maybe, he would find his true happiness. And maybe, his goal would change back to his ordinary goal, to find what made him happy.

Somehow, he supposed it was changing now. Because, these days, he felt like his heart was happier than before a little bit, day by day.

“Come in, Jiyong.” His voice startled Jiyong by how he knew if it was him.

“H…hey hyung. You’re here this early?” Jiyong slowly closed the door as soon as he stepped in.

The office was still the same, and the feeling of walking through this door still somehow left Jiyong with moments of fears in the past. But, somehow, going in and out between this door seems so much easier for him, since he was not just an ordinary trainee.

“Have a sit.” Hyunsuk still looked as serious as before, but his voice tended to loosen. “Why are you so early today?”

“Ah..” Jiyong felt stuck on his tongue. “Just… because.”

“Alright.”

Hyunsuk started to make a sound with his throat, not looking at Jiyong. Then, Jiyong saw a small grin on his face.

“What do you want to talk about?”

“Ah…” Jiyong never felt this way before, that it was harder to even talk to him in person than talking on the phone. “I heard from Taehee…”

When the room was deadly silent, Jiyong felt his heart beating fast hoping that the person in front of him couldn’t hear it. Hyunsuk should be saying something, but to what Jiyong had expected, he only continued grinning with his half-serious and half-unknown face.

“Oh. Your dating issue?” Jiyong was surprised at how his voice sounded so calm right now.

“How… How long have you known, hyung?”

“Well…” Hyunsuk looked pretty calm and it bothered Jiyong even more. “I think they sent me the photos not too long ago? 3 weeks? Or 2? I don’t remember.”

“Hyung, about that…”

“Don’t worry. I’m taking care of it.” Hyunsuk suddenly cut him off, and the content of his words somehow surprised him even more.

“Hyung…”

But when Jiyong looked at Hyunsuk, his face no longer remained calm as before. Hyunsuk was worried, whether for the sake of his career, or for his best student, best companion, and best brother.

“Jiyong ah, I’m asking you this time, again. Do you want to expose it or not?”