I was a little dizzy when I left the bar. I didn’t care about how wobbly my feet were. I wanted to escape and run but it felt like I was stuck in the same place. 

 (credits to: Kimmeiei)

  I reached my apartment and felt something like there was something missing. Must be my heart.

               This morning, I woke up feeling sick. My head was throbbing and hurting like HELL. I’m never gonna drink so much beer again. My empty stomach grumbled for food. Ugh. Depression is not my thing. It’s not healthy. I can’t be an emo forever, can I?

                I searched for food in the fridge and found nothing but rotten cheese. Life hates me. I just decided to order pizza at Liggy’s (nearest pizza house and my favorite). I the TV while I was waiting for the delivery when my doorbell rang. Great! I’m so hungryyy~

                I opened the door and said, “Wow that was…quick.” I was expecting the delivery boy. I didn’t expect to see a woman, wearing a blue, medium sleeve length shirt and black jeans standing in front of my door. She had a big, black bag on her. She opened when she saw my confused expression.

                “Good morning. I’m Sooyoung, one of the managers of SM Entertainment.” She was businesslike.

                “Uh, what can I do for you?” I asked; my mind still chaotic.

                “Are you Lee Jinki?”

             I didn’t know how to answer. A tall, pretty girl is standing in front of me. And she’s a manager of SM Entertainment. She should have been a celebrity, not a manager! A beautiful girl like her should be seen on TV. She didn’t wait for my answer and asked again.

                “Can I come in?”

                “Y-yeah. Sure.” I stuttered as I let the door open wide.

                “Mr. Lee Jinki, I am here to pick up some stuff.”

                “Stuff?  What stuff?” Just what is this girl talking about?

                “I have been asked to pick up Ms. Jessica’s CD's.”

                “Why?”

                “Because our company needs it for documentation. Those CD’s contain the songs sung by Jessica.”

                They need those CD’s? I don’t understand these people. I excused myself and went to my room. Hmmm. Which box??

                 SICA’S.

             Oh. Found it. It was at the upper right side of my cabinet. That box contained a lot of Jessica’s things. She brought things here in my apartment and never took them back home. It was okay for me because she was my girlfriend. I wanted her to feel that she has a place in my home.

            I took the box and opened it. There was a bear, a notebook, her old toothbrush (I don’t even know why she still kept it. She said everything has a sentimental value.), books, a toy microphone, her CD’s and many other things. For a second, I thought, “Why should I give these CD’s to that manager? These things were Jessica’s. I can’t just give them away.” But I’ve realized that I should get over her. I haven’t heard from her since our break up. It’s been a week and a half already so I decided to give Sooyoung the whole box.

                “Here.” I said as I let go of the box in her arms.

                “Woah. This is… heavy. She must have been addicted to recording songs.” She said.

                “Those are all of Jessica’s things. You can take them together with the CD’s.”

                “Nonono. I only need her CD’s. I-“

                “Please take them with you and give it back to her. Those aren’t mine.”

                “O-okay. Thank you Mr. Lee Jinki.”

                “Sure thing.”

                She left with Jessica’s things and brought the memories of the girl I loved with her.

             The pizza arrived and I ate the whole box. "This will be the last day that I’ll be depressed", I told myself.  Life won’t be the same without Jessica, but it must go on. I must move on. I realized that the world will keep turning and the hands of the clock will keep ticking without her. There will come a day that I will find someone new. But I don’t know if I could love somebody more than I loved Jessica.

              I woke up early and went to work. One and a half week was a long leave.

“Wow. Look who decided to show up.” Jonghyun, my friend and my officemate, said.

“That was a long leave, hyung. I could use a leave as well and take a vacation.” Minho said.

“Oooh. Take me with you, Minho hyung!” Taemin grabbed Minho’s sleeve.

“No, Taemin. You have a lot of paperworks to do.” Key told him. Taemin pouted and just gave up.

“Uh guys, I’ll be in the editor’s office.” I told them. Clearly, I was not in the mood to talk about vacation.

…

SOOYOUNG’S POV

          Aish! That stupid Sooman. He always asks me to do things that are not involved in my job. If the promotion thing will not work out well (I’m aiming to be one of the top managers of the best entertainment company in South Korea. Duh.), I’m gonna catch some cockroaches and put it in his closet! This is not the reality I wanted! GAAH. This is so stressful! S-T-R-E-S-S-F-U-L.

          I’m getting hungry and I want to eat.  BUT I CAN’T! I have to find that Lee Jinki! He was not home so… he’s probably at work (according to my sources). Where the heck is his work place?

…

             FOUND IT! HA! Lee Jinki, why did you have to be so good-looking and talented? Now SM’s hunting you.

            I picked up all of Jessica’s stuff and gave the CD’s to SM. One of those CD’s that says ‘Jinki and Jessica’s Cover’ contained a cover of the song Banmal Song. It was really good. Sooman liked it so much; he told me to talk to Lee Jinki again and convince him to be an idol. Who would refuse this kind of offer? Many people would trade their souls to the devil just to get in SM Entertainment. Congratulations, Mr. Lee Jinki. You’re really lucky.

…

SOOYOUNG’S POV

             After driving for almost 45 minutes, I found the magazine publishing company where Lee Jinki works. ‘DIVA’

             Really? DIVA? Who comes up with these names?

…

JINKI’S POV

             Finally, I found peace. Being the assistant editor-in-chief gives me the privilege of getting in and out of this room. This room is peaceful and SOUND PROOF. The editor-in-chief is not here so I can sit and relax for a while.

Just when I thought I could finally have peace, the phone rang.

“Yes?” I asked.

“Hyung, there’s a… there’s a beautiful woman looking for you.” Jonghyun said from the other line.

“Huh? Who is it?”

“She said her name’s Sooyoung.”

“Sooyoung?” I furrowed my brow, thinking who could Sooyoung be.

“Let her in.” I told Jonghyun.

Seconds later, the door opened.

“Hello again, Mr. Lee Jinki.” The woman smiled at me. Now I remember. She was the woman who picked up Sica’s stuff.

“Did you forget something in my apartm-“

“No. I’m here to discuss some things with you.” She cut me off.

“What things?”

“Well…” She then told me how Sooman discovered me.

“So what are you trying to say?” I frowned.

“SM wants you to be a part of the SM family.”

“What? Look, I’m busy here. I still have a lot of things to do so I don’t have time for this.”

“I’m serious.  This is an offer made by Sooman. The founder and the chairman of-“

“I know that. I know who he is. What I don’t is why you’re here telling me all this.”

“I already told you. He wants you to be an idol.”

“Why me? There are a lot of talented singers in South Korea.”

“Yes, but are they good-looking?” She tilted her head as she smiled.

…

JINKI’S POV

              Next thing I know, I already agreed to what she was saying. I've been training for two weeks now and Sooman said I was a fast learner. He said I was good. He said I was really good. 

             “You don’t need to train anymore. You were born a singer. But... you know you gotta learn how to dance” Sooman said. I know must learn everything what an idol is  supposed to. Even though this was the reason why Jessica left me, I still wanted to try being in her world and see things the way she did.

             Unlike other artists, I learned everything fast. I know that I’m good at this so I quit my job and decided to be a singer. With Jessica gone, I felt like changing my lifestyle. And this is a good start.

…

JESSICA’S POV

            It’s been almost a year since I got here in Japan. Work has been good. But I missed Korea. I missed home. A lot of things happened last year. I got everything I wanted. My dreams came true. I am now the most famous Korean celebrity in Japan. I made it here and everyone’s proud of me. But why do I still feel like there’s something missing? Did I really choose what’s best for me?

“Hey, Sica.” Teukie Oppa, my manager, tapped me from behind.

“Hey.” I greeted back.

“Well… Sooman called me and he wants you back in Korea.” He coolly told me.

“Wait, what? What about my projects here in Japan?”

“He said that you need to be exposed in the Korean industry this time. You’ve stayed here for so long already. It’s time to go back.”

“Do I have projects to go back to?” I asked him. This concerned me. I didn’t want my career to die.

“Yes. There’s a project waiting for you. You’ll be singing a duet with Kyuhyun. Since you’re still busy with your projects here, he’ll go to Japan to practice with you. The three of us will go back to Korea together and then…” He paused to catch his breath.

“Then you two will record the song and sing it on a cultural festival that will be held in Daegu.” He continued.

             “Great. I can’t wait to go back to Korea.” I was half happy and half sad. I was happy because finally, after almost a year, I will go back to Korea and visit my family, but sad at the same time, because I know that Jinki won’t be there to welcome me home.