He Doesn't Want Me Either

Another Brick Wall (To Break Down)
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“Jungkook, please be seated.” The Red Queen’s tone is warm and inviting, and Jungkook can’t help the small smile that plays on his lips.

“Nae, Mama,” Jungkook answers his mother-in-law to be with a polite bow before sitting down.

“Now that I see you up close, you are indeed very handsome,” the woman says, and Jungkook blushes at the sincerity in her voice.

“Thank you, Your Highness.”

She stares at him for a moment longer, as though sizing him up, and then continues.

“This a great responsibility that we’ve placed on your and Hoseok’s shoulders. Marriage is daunting enough without the added pressure of uniting two tribes, but the King and I knew you were the right choice the moment we saw you,” the Queen informs him.

He stares incredulously at the woman for a moment, the words she’s spoken orbiting around the outskirts of his mind but never landing. They’re just too unbelievable to be true. Jungkook decides he needs clarification.

“Y-you chose me?” She nods her reply to his query. “Why?”

“I think it was about a year ago,” the Queen starts, “I’m not sure which function it was now, but your family attended, your parents, you, and your four older siblings. A few days prior to the event the King and I had discussed a union for Hoseok, one that would unite our kingdoms and hopefully put an end to this feud that has gone on for far too long. Your brothers were all very poised and stately, but you, you were wide-eyed and curious. I enjoyed the event so much more just watching you learn and take everything in; I decided then and there that you would be the right mate for my son.”

The Queen answers so casually, as though her words were standard and no big deal, as though finding a spouse for your child is as simple as buying new socks or underwear. In the same breath, Jungkook’s stunned that she sees something in him that is unique, that she believes he is worthy of her son, whom he knows without having to ask, the woman loves very much. A sting of something, jealousy perhaps, pricks at Jungkook’s insides. He wonders if his mother has ever had that look of pride on her face, the one he sees on Hoseok’s mother’s face now, when talking about him. He supposes not.

“I will do my utmost to make him happy, Mama.” Jungkook means it; he wants this marriage to work. He wants to feel loved and cared for, wants to belong somewhere.

The Queen smiles, and it tickles the inside of Jungkook’s soul, birthing hope.

“I know you will, Jungkook-sshi. Now let’s talk about the future, shall we?” He nods. “First we will have to make arrangements to move you into the palace so that we can start your training. Our customs and traditions differ from yours somewhat,” she says matter-of-factly. “I hope this will not be an issue. If you want to live with your family until the ceremony, we could arrange for a tutor, I suppose.”

“No,” he answers too quickly, much too quickly. The Queen angles her head, staring at him curiously for a moment. Jungkook inhales and exhales slowly, regaining his composure. “I mean, immersion is the best way to learn. I don’t want to be distracted.” He hopes he’s covered his earlier overzealousness, but the thought of spending more time with his family than he needs to has his stomach in knots.

“Ahh,” the Queen replies with a nod. “That is very wise and thoughtful. Yes, living among us would make the learning process somewhat less chaotic. Very well, I shall have my Minister of Culture start the process of getting you moved. How much time would you require to say proper goodbyes to your family?”

Jungkook can’t fight the bitter laugh bubbling inside of him, like a volcano of sorrow. Apart from his eldest hyung, he doubts his family cares he’s leaving. It hurts that Hoseok’s mother, a stranger, cares more about him than his own blood.

“Not long, Your Majesty,” he answers. “No longer than a few days.”

“Ahhh,” there’s something in her response that tells Jungkook she’s caught on to his real reason. “Very well, is three days sufficient?”

“Yes, that should be more than enough time, Mama.”

She smiles again, and this time Jungkook swears he sees pity in her brown eyes.

 

 

“Dude, what’s with an arranged marriage in the twenty-first century,” Eli asks, flopping down in the desk next to Hoseok’s.

“Nice to see you too, Kim. How are you this morning?” Hoseok deflects the question. It’s a game he and Eli Kim have been playing since Hoseok entered his first year of university and met the boy.

“I’m lovely, as always. However, not sure I can say the same for you.” The man arches his brow, and Hoseok sighs.

“Such are the trials of royalty, I suppose,” he says with a shrug of his shoulder, hoping that Eli will just drop the matter.

He doesn’t.

“What about Mara?” Eli asks, and Hoseok can feel the smug challenge in the question.

“What about her?” he asks tightly, lips drawn in a line.

“Well, she can’t be too pleased with the fact that your marriage isn’t to her, and to a male, no less.”

Hoseok cringes at the statement. Mara’s not his girlfriend; they’re not dating, but she has been his love interest ever since he walked into the wrong classroom his Junior year and met the sassy Communications major.

“You have a point, Kim?” He wants to smack the man; he always wants to smack the man.

“Leave him alone, Eli.” Hoseok looks up at the sound of Won-sik’s voice. Hoseok sighs in relief. The cavalry has arrived. “Why are you always starting with him? Give it a break.” Ravi, as his friends affectionately call him, turns to face Hoseok, concern on his face. “You okay?”

“Does it matter if I am or not?” Hoseok responds with a forlorn sigh. “What I want doesn’t factor into my future. The needs of the country trump all.” The words come out more biting than he meant them to be. “I have to go. I have a schedule.”

He bows to the men before leaving the room; they’re not his friends, but they're not mere acquaintances. They’re more like floaters, people who enter into his life for a period of time for a specific reason, and once their purpose ends they leave and Hoseok is once again alone. Loneliness is par for the course of a royal. The term 'it’s lonely at the top' is apropos.

Glancing down at his watch to check the time, he breaks into a slight run. He’ll be late if he continues to walk, and Royals are never late.

“Oh , sorry,” he says to the figure he nearly knocks over in his haste.

“S’okay, hyung.” The newly familiar voice has him taking a step back.

“What are you doing here?” He doesn't mean to sound angry. He’s not, not really.

“I-I,” Jungkook stutters, and Hoseok feels guilty but ignores it and waits silently for the boy to answer. “I had to register for classes since I will be moving here,” Jungkook says, his head down, studying his feet.

“M-moving?” Now it’s Hoseok’s turn to stutter.

“Yes, to start my training for the, uhm…so I can, uhm-”

“S’okay, I get it,” Hoseok answers, finally cutting the tongue-tied prince some slack. “What classes?”

“Uhm, photography,” Jungkook says shyly, ears turning red.

“Ahh,

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lsgrlr
Yes, I did just write 2k of sad Jungkook. Yup, I did cry.

Comments

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robin5
#1
Chapter 4: Wiping tears while trying to type is a pain. Why do your stories keep doing this to me? How are your characters so real and relatable? Please feel free to mess with my emotions any time. As long as you keep writing - I'll keep reading! Sending love your way :^*
robin5
#2
Chapter 3: "Live life as a guest in the hearts of people you care about' - wow, that's beautiful and sad. Come on Kookie - you can win your place in his heart.
1111116 #3
Chapter 4: omgsssss im sobbinggggg i love thissss! need more though!!
realmdreamer #4
Chapter 4: soo sad TT.TT the angst got me crying. Loving Taetae though
worldofmyown
#5
Chapter 4: Awww ♡ Hoseok knows how to hold such a delicate flower. I really liked this chapter and hope Jungkook finds his self worth despite his experiences
Isolemlysweariloveme #6
Chapter 4: Also Taehyung you're the best
Isolemlysweariloveme #7
Chapter 4: I' M CRYING AND IT'S YOUR FAUL
aarya93
#8
Chapter 4: Poor Kookie, but now it's gonna be alright, I can see Hobi falling for him!
Umin92 #9
Chapter 4: Hoseok will fall hard, no one can ever resist our bunny
Big_Mama
#10
Chapter 3: Please update soon author-nim. I can't wait to read the next chapter.