Mingyu rest his head on his table, his music blasting in his ears.

It was 7:43am.

There's was still 17 more minutes before first period but there were already a couple of students chilling in class.

Mingyu’s seat partner, Wonwoo was sitting beside him, his nose deeply buried in the spine of his new book. Minghao, who sat two seats in front of him, was in deep slumber and Joshua who sat by the teacher's table was busy revising for next week's Math test. Seungkwan was sitting on Vernon’s desk, chatting excitedly about a new song he had came across during the weekends. As for Seokmin, who sat four tables diagonally to the right of Mingyu was happily texting on his phone.

Mingyu watched as a wide smile spread across Seokmin’s face after receiving a new text. He watched as the boy happily typed in his reply, still grinning from ear to ear. Mingyu rolled his eyes and let out a deep sigh before burying his face in his arms.

There the two were, not far from his seat by the wall. It was the Mid-Spring formal. Seokmin was dressed in a fancy black tux and his date was in a navy blue one.

Mingyu watched the two of them, just barely inches apart, slow dancing to the music. He felt torn inside. He was happy for Seokmin, but how he wished that he was the one who was able to make the other boy the happiest in the world.

He wished that instead of Soonyoung, it was him with his hands on Seokmin’s waist while they danced in the moonlight.

God how Mingyu wished that was him.

Mingyu felt a gentle pat on his shoulder. He lifted his head up sleepily, rubbing his eyes while he let out a soft yawn. He glared at his best friend for breaking off his dream. The other boy nonchalantly pointed his finger, eyeing Mingyu for a short bit before returning to his book.

Mingyu removed his earpiece in irritation and followed the direction that Wonwoo was pointing to. His eyes fell on the couple.

Soonyoung was smiling down at Seokmin who was still sitting in his chair. Soonyoung had leaned against Seokmin’s desk, his fingers interlocked with Seokmin as the two chatted happily. Mingyu watched as Soonyoung gently caresses the back of Seokmin’s hand with his thumbs.

Mingyu died a little.

The loving gaze shared between the two didn't break even for a second.

“Why couldn't he ever look at me like that?”

Mingyu sighed as he dropped his head back onto the desk, replacing his earpiece into his ear, allowing the music to drown the world around him. He felt Wonwoo’s hand rubbing his back gently, in an attempt to comfort him. Mingyu let out a deep sigh.

_______________

~5 years ago~

“Yah Mingyuu can you please catch that Seokmin, he's embarrassing us!” Minghao whined, tugging onto Mingyu’s sleeve like a little child.

Mingyu laughed out loud, as he watch his best friend half a football court ahead of them, doing a weird impersonation of a pigeon. Minghao buried his face in his hands out of embarrassment. Mingyu jogged up to Seokmin, stopping short a few feet from his friend, holding his hands up, pretending that he's a hunter who's about to take the shot at the bird.

“YAHH! I SAID STOP HIM! NOT JOIN HIM!!” Mingyu ignored his friend's pleadings.

The two acted out their hunter and prey act for a bit before Mingyu suddenly dashed towards Seokmin, grabbing him by the waist, making the two fall to the ground. Mingyu toppled over Seokmin, holding himself up on his hands and knees. The two were laughing hard.

As he open his eyes, Mingyu looked down at Seokmin, who was trapped beneath him. Seokmin was smiling widely to Mingyu, in hopes that Mingyu would spare him and let him go, tickle-free.

Mingyu’s heart froze.

“Wait what?”

Seokmin’s smile slowly disappeared as confusion filled him instead, not understanding why Mingyu was just staring down at him and was not attacking him.

“YAH GUYS! MAY I REMIND YOU THAT WE'RE STILL IN A PUBLIC PLACE! WE'RE IN SCHOOL! LEAVE THIS FOR THE BEDROOM!” Minghao’s voice boomed as he single handedly grabbed Mingyu’s forearm, pulling him up and off Seokmin.

Mingyu staggered a bit, as he tried to steady himself.

“What was that?” Mingyu muttered softly under his breath.

He placed his hand over his heart and felt it beating hard against his chest. He felt a gentle tug on his arm. He turned to face Seokmin.

“Hey.. Are you feeling okay?” the boy questioned him, his worry was clear in his words.

Mingyu nodded his head, waving his hand in the air.

“Yeah, I think that the sudden dash on an empty stomach was a bad idea. Let's go eat now.” Mingyu said hooking his arms with Minghao’s and Seokmin’s, standing between the two, leading the way to the new cafe they wanted to try.

Months passed and Mingyu’s feelings have yet to disappear. Whenever Seokmin walks by he'd try to say it. But right at the moment he was about to, he'd never do it.

He had tried, countless of times to try and get it off his chest. He'd call for Seokmin’s attention. The boy he called for turned to him, smiling his signature toothy grin that makes his eyes disappear.

“Yep?” Seokmin asked raising an eyebrow to the boy who had called for him.

And there it goes, his confidence, it flew straight out of the window. He froze and the words failed to come out. His tongue gets tied, trapping his words.

He would hear the beat of his heart getting louder, whenever Seokmin was near him.

Mingyu then spent the next few weeks pulling himself away from the group, denying himself the torment of being so close and yet so far away from him. That created the cracks in their friendship. Slowly, the trio grew apart, as Mingyu trailed Wonwoo around school, and Minghao started dating Jun. Poor Seokmin was left wondering about alone, until the day he was paired with Soonyoung for an English project.

The two started spending more time together, aside from the times they've met up for project discussions. Mingyu noticed the way Soonyoung looks at Seokmin. It kills him inside to see how easily Soonyoung was able to slip into Seokmin’s life and heart.

Mingyu watched as Soonyoung slipped his arm around Seokmin’s waist as they walked down the hall. He watched as Soonyoung hugged Seokmin from the back, reading his work as the boy continued to finish his overdue work. Soonyoung does all the things that Mingyu knew that he could, if only he could just turn back time. Back to the day he first felt the tug on his heart strings.

Because there were three little words that he's always been dying to tell Seokmin.

How he wished he could turn back time.

______________

Mingyu leaned over his locker, waiting for Wonwoo to finish keeping his books in his locker. His eyes trailed the smiley boy walking closely with his boyfriend.

Soonyoung reached his locker and took out a single stalk of Sunflower. He gave the flower to Seokmin, giving the boy a quick wink.

Mingyu watched as Seokmin eyed the flower in glee. Sunflowers were Seokmin’s favourite after Mingyu had pointed out to him how similar he was to a Sunflower. Mingyu had explained how in the name itself there's two words combined. “Sun” and “flower”.

“Sun” reflects Seokmin’s sunny personality, always bright and cheery. “Flower” represents Seokmin’s inner beauty, how the boy is able to bloom nicely with great kindness and purity.

Seokmin smiled lovingly at the flower. His heart broke a little remembering the initial reason led to his love for the flower. His smile slowly fell.

His eyes searched for him.

There he was, leaning by his locker. Waiting for his dear Wonwoo.

His heart felt heavy.

He has yet to understand why his best friend had left him so suddenly. He constantly questioned himself, trying to reflect back, wondering if it was his fault.

“It must be. He's clearly avoiding me. Maybe he found out about my feelings for him and felt grossed out by it.”

“Yah.. Seokie~ Why are you crying? I thought you said that Sunflowers are you favourite?” Soonyoung’s voice cut off Seokmin’s train of thoughts.

Seokmin shook his head and wiped off the tears in his eyes. He smiled up to his boyfriend.

“It's nothing. I really love Sunflowers. Thank you for remembering. I love you.” Seokmin leaned in and pecked Soonyoung’s lips.

The two walked down the hall hand in hand, their fingers intertwined.

Mingyu turned back to watch the couple.

“Oh how I wish that was me.”

His eyes fell to the flower in Seokmin’s hand.

“I would've been the one to give him that flower.”