coming out
godmothernote: an enormous amount of ual references and swear words. chapter takes place in the past, before dani's birth.
It’s a well known fact that Kim Sejeong is gay. It isn’t hard to figure it out by oneself. Although she doesn’t have a particular distaste towards men, her incline towards women was and still is, very obvious.
Chungha was the first to find out, to confirm her suspicions, whichever you prefer. She cornered Sejeong in the locker room after one of their weekly basketball trainings as soon as the latter stepped out of the bathroom cubicle.
“So, tell me.”
“About what?”
“You’re gay, aren’t you?”
With Chungha’s arms trapping her against the wall, Sejeong was taken aback by the sudden question. She felt flustered, nervous, scared even. But what she noticed wasn’t that.
She noticed the water droplets dripping from the tip of Chungha’s wet locks, how her eyes ever so subtly flickered towards her lips, and the small bubbling excitement as her very attractive friend was inches in front of her. Sejeong was attracted to Chungha, she knew that. She’s sure the said girl knows that, too. But she never knew that she felt the same way.
“So what if I am? Does that bother you?” Sejeong admitted with a slight grin gracing her lips and Chungha smirked in response. Sejeong’s mind was devoid of anything but Chungha and she leaned forward in slight anticipation.
“Absolutely not.” And Chungha closed the gap between their lips.
Sejeong didn’t feel the butterflies in her stomach. She didn’t feel her heart start to race at the speed of light. But she still felt good, like she was on cloud nine. She was more than ecstatic when she felt like she didn’t have to hide that much from everyone. She felt relieved that she found someone just like her, someone she can relate to, someone who can understand her. She knew that Chungha felt the same.
And that person who had the ability to understand her happened to be one of her closest friends, and she felt even better.
“You know that I’m only doing this because I find you very hot, right? Apart from the fact that I’m attracted to girls.” Sejeong mumbled against Chungha’s lips, desperately wanting a break as the latter rested her hands on Sejeong’s waist, dangerously close to her lower hips.
Chungha chuckled and pulled away. “Great way to ruin the mood. But same here,” she twirls a strand of Sejeong’s hair and allowed herself to be pulled flush against Sejeong’s torso.
Chungha allowed herself to enjoy her time with Sejeong in the locker room, and Sejeong allowed herself to drown in Chungha’s lust-filled eyes.
For once, they allowed themselves to be free.
Coming out didn’t seem like a worry anymore. And Sejeong was more than glad that her friends could accept her. What she never expected was her closest friends to actually be on the same boat.
“Wait, so hold the up. All of you?” Sejeong stared incredulously at Doyeon, Chungha and Yoojung.
They were currently at the gym, as Yoojung refused to leave due to ‘very obvious reasons’. Sejeong didn’t mind, the students in the gym were scattered around, various small cliques focused on their own gossip and minding their own business- perfect for a conversation like this.
“Yeah,” the three of them answered simultaneously.
“When did you…” Sejeong trailed off, not knowing how to phrase her question due to disbelief.
“Yoojung told us a few days before you did, I just told them yesterday, and Doyeon came out a year back,” Chungha’s tone contained a twinge of amusement.
Sejeong placed her hands on her chest in mock hurt, letting out a dramatic scoff. “And you never told me? Who am I, the e next door?”
Yoojung snickered. “I thought that my actions are pretty obvious? I mean, half of the time I’m ogling at Jieqiong from the cheerleading squad.”
At that instant, the door to the sports hall opened, and there was Zhou Jieqiong with her fellow cheerleading teammates. She walked with a slight sway to her hips, her cheerleading uniform hugging her in all the right places. The four of them, along with the other students who were ‘studying’ on the stands, stared at her with awestruck eyes. Sejeong her lips as she opened to voice out her thoughts. Zhou-
“Jieqiong is so ing hot,” breathed out Chungha, Yoojung, Doyeon and Sejeong with their mouths opened. It was a rather comical and usual scene (usually without Sejeong), but this time Jieqiong actually heard the four of them, and their mouths snapped shut in an instant as soon as she whipped her head to their direction.
Jieqiong recognised Chungha, who was in majority of her classes. She waved lightly before heading towards the four of them, who immediately started to recompose themselves. Yoojung was sweating bullets, Doyeon was fidgeting like hell, Chungha was attempting to fix her hairstyle, and Sejeong was desperately trying to stop looking at Jieqiong like a dead fish.
“Chungha! It’s been a while since I’ve last talked to you,” Jieqiong flashed her ‘million-dollar smile’ (“it’s ing true,” Yoojung insisted) and Chungha internally swooned.
“J-jieqiong! It’s been a while,” she trailed off with an awkward chuckle.
Jieqiong turned to the rest. “And you must be… Yoojung?”
“Yeah, hi,” Yoojung squeaked an octave too high and Jieqiong giggles before reaching out.
“You’re so cute,” she lightly pinched Yoojung’s cheeks, earning a furious blush from the smaller girl.
“Thank you,” Yoojung said timidly and she smiles once more at her before turning to Doyeon.
“Doyeon, right? I’ve heard a lot from my friends, they said you’re a great dancer. Join the cheerleading team, yeah?” Jieqiong said while gesturing to her other friends who have gained a lot of spotlight as they warm up for their practice.
Doyeon nodded blankly, having not realised that the school year will be over in a few months. “Sure, n-no problem.”
“And last but not least, Kim Sejeong. My friends say that you are quite the charmer, and I had to see for myself,” Jieqiong turned to the last member of their small clique and smirked.
Sejeong swallowed. Zhou Jieqiong was, sort of, flirting with her.
She scratched her nape in embarrassment. “I’m not,” she said bashfully with a soft smile plastered on her face.
“Cute. Just like my style. Want to hang out sometime?” Jieqiong’s smirk widened and Sejeong knew that she had been hooked. And there’s no way back out.
“Sure,” Sejeong managed to choke out her answer coolly and Jieqiong leaned closer. She felt her breath lightly tickling her ear, and to top that a paper slip was tucked into her hand.
“Call me,” Jieqiong whispered before pulling away and she gave them a final wave. She then turned and jogged to join her friends for the practice.
As soon as she’s out of earshot, Chungha asked Sejeong. “Did she just ask you out?”
Sejeong stared at the small piece of paper once again.
“I think she did.”
It has been six months since that encounter with Jieqiong and Sejeong finally came out to her best friend.
“I’m gay. I’m seeing Jieqiong,” Sejeong blurted out before she could stop herself.
Somi looked up from her textbook to glance at her before looking down again in what seemed like disinterest. “Oh.”
Sejeong frowned. “Just oh?”
“Yeah, oh. Why, what’s wrong with that?”
“I expected a bigger reaction? You’re my best friend, Som.”
The said girl placed her book on the table before looking at her. “I figured from ages ago. You were pretty obvious. And Jieqiong wasn’t never quiet with her love life.”
It was Sejeong’s turn to stay mum. “Ah, I see.”
“You’re not the only one hiding your uality. I’m not straight either. I think I’m biual.” Somi sighed and looked at Sejeong carefully.
Sejeong’s head snapped up at the confession. “That’s all five of us. That’s… amazing. Yoojung, Chungha, Doyeon and I never told you about our… preferences in case you were uncomfortable with it. I’ve never had similar conversations with you, after all, so I didn’t know if you would react violently.”
“Thank the heavens then, this is a huge relief. The ‘Five Idiots’ are now the newest gay cult,” Somi snickered and the once-tense atmosphere was no more as Sejeong responded with a laugh. “Who did you first come out to?”
“Chungha, almost a year ago. She guessed it and I acknowledged it. We…” Sejeong trailed off.
Somi’s eyes were as wide as saucers. “You guys hooked up, didn’t you?”
“In the locker room after basketball, yeah,” Sejeong admitted sheepishly and Somi squeals.
“Classic. How was it?” Somi pressed on and Sejeong flushed red.
“Pretty good…” Sejeong whispered and Somi howled in laughter. It was a sight to see- Kim Sejeong being flustered and all.
Sensing Sejeong’s discomfort and embarrassment, Somi quickly changed the subject. “What about Jieqiong?” Somi asked out of curiosity.
Sejeong’s faced was now ten times redder and she fanned her face. “She’s good as well,” she mumbled. “But we don’t just, you know, have . We go out on dates and ,” she added quickly.
Somi hummed in response. “I actually didn’t ask you about how good Jieqiong is in bed. I was asking about her in general. But anyways, I like how were jumping freely from your flings to your girlfriend.”
Sejeong hid her face behind her hands in shame and scoffed. “You’re just being your usual self, you curious little prick.”
Somi winked at her in agreement and decided to interrogate Sejeong even more. “You think you and Jieqiong are going to last?”
Sejeong shook her head. ‘I don’t know, maybe. It’s our last year and there’s only a few weeks left till the end of the school year. Our relationship isn’t that serious, it’s more relaxed and we’re just… there for each other, I guess…” She glanced at her watch and yelped. “. Bad timing, but I have to go, date with Jieqiong.” She stood up to pack her belongings into her backpack. She placed a quick kiss on Somi’s forehead and left with a hasty “goodbye”.
Somi returned her goodbye with a playful slap to her .
“Let’s go, Kim Sejeong! Get in there!”
Somi earned a wave in the form of Kim Sejeong’s two middle fingers, and she erupted in laughter once more.
They’re curled up in Jieqiong’s room. A date was changed into an impromptu heart-to-heart session as they confide to each other like never before.
Sejeong expected small secrets, gossips, insecurities, something along the lines of that. Not a ing nuclear bomb.
“I’m leaving after I graduate.”
Sejeong’s heart stopped right then and there.
‘Fight it’, she chanted in her head as she felt the tears start to form. The tears forced themselves back down and she finally looked up. “Where to?”
“China. I… I won’t be coming back. Not for a while, at least.”
Sejeong felt her heart clench. This wasn’t supposed to happen. She wasn’t supposed to be that attached to the school’s goddess. “Oh. Um, I don’t know what to say.”
Jieqiong hugged her closer. “Never expected you to.”
A hum and all was quiet once again. It was way too tense for Sejeong’s liking, Jieqiong knew that. “I’m so sorry.”
Sejeong shook her head. “It’s alright, it’s okay.”
Nothing was okay.
“Pft, dramatic,” Yoojung scoffed, downing her fourth can of beer.
“Am not.”
“Are to.”
“Am not.”
“Are- ouch, ing hell, that hurt like a ,” Yoojung hissed and glared at Chungha, who sipped on her beer, acting nonchalant.
“Anyways, because I was rudely interrupted. It wasn’t okay then,” Sejeong continued with her dramatic storytelling. “When she left for China I was a mes-”
“Lies. Lies everywhere,” Somi hollered, waving her beer can as an interruption. “Bull, I say.”
Sejeong gaped at her. “That’s not true. I was very-”
“Disappointed because she couldn’t have anymore revenge fu-”
“Doyeon! Language!” Chungha butted in. “Kids, calm down and let the once-heartbroken girl finish her oh so tragic story,” her tone was dripping of sarcasm and the three girls snickered.
Sejeong huffed and took a swig of her beer before continuing. “It was pretty rough when she first left.”
“We know. You were moping around,” Chungha hummed understandingly.
“Point is,” Sejeong quickly said, “I got over it pretty quickly. I think it’s because I just liked her, but not to the point where I’d invest everything in her. It was the same for her. And plus, we parted on good terms and I don’t have any hard feelings. At all. I mean like, it’s been a year and we’re still texting each other.”
Doyeon nodded before adding a greasy wink. “Friends with benefits?”
Somi choked on her drink and Yoojung’s look was outrageous as she slapped Doyeon’s thigh. “Snap out of it, they’re literally miles and miles and miles apart,” she high fives Chungha as soon as the latter got the High School Musical reference. “Friends with benefits simply don’t work like that.”
Doyeon raised her fist before turning to Sejeong once again, the greasy smirk plastered on her face. “You guys are ting aren’t yo- ouch!”
Doyeon ended up with a slipper slapping the left side of her face, a fist connecting with the other side of it, a head lock from behind from Somi and a precious can of beer poured on her head. To top it off Doyeon’s ears were blessed with the catchphrase of the so called “Idiot Gay Cult”- “stop being so dirty!”
(“Guys, beer being poured onto my body is actually quite erot- ow! , Chungha!”)
Doyeon made a mental note to never, ever, have ‘Sejeong’ and ‘friends with benefits’ in the same sentence. Or make any dirty jokes. She’ll lose all of her brain cells at this rate.
A/N: sorry that i took another like two/three weeks to update. just a quick shout out to Heath23 and MercuryRose for upvoting. We're nearing 40 subscribers this is like, crazy... thank you for the support and the great response.
an update to celebrate the new year... HAPPY NEW YEAR Y'ALL :)))))) i sincerely wish you all the best and have a wonderful year :)
this has been Sesomislife and i will see you soon with another chapter :)
p.s. i love the pledis girlz's version of Adore U... absolutely cannot deal with them, they're amazing
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