Minwoo was sitting on his couch after practice, an empty bowl on the coffee table. He came home instead of going out with the guys afterwards. He’d showered and put on sweats and a t-shirt and cooked some ramen. The news was droning from the television when suddenly there was a knock on the front door. He stood and walked to the door. Once opened, the door revealed Eric, whose whole body shook as tears streamed down his cheeks. Minwoo was shocked to see him in such a state and he moved so Eric could step inside.

“He…..Hyesung……he wants a divorce.” His face was swollen from crying and his arms hung uselessly at his sides, hands clenched into loose fists. He looked at Minwoo and reached for him but Minwoo grasped his arm and led him to the couch. Eric sat down and his head dropped into his hands as he started to sob brokenly, each sob so heart wrenching that they broke Minwoo’s heart but he stood and watched him, no clue how to comfort him.

He finally sat down on the coffee table in front of Eric and placed one hand on his head and Eric’s hair gently. He’s never seen his friend this way and it made him feel useless. His hand kept moving as he watched Eric’s shoulders slowly stop heaving and watched him lean back against the couch, his eyes swollen and closed. He watched Eric for a moment before he moved to sit beside him and waited for Eric to speak. The room was silent except for the sound of Eric’s labored breathing.

“He said……he said he isn’t happy anymore. That he can’t pretend to be oil and water anymore. He’s not leaving Shinhwa but he can’t be with me anymore.” His voice had a deadness in it, like his sobs had stolen all his emotions. “He told me that he only married me because of the way the fans ship us.” His fists clenched tight as he said this.

“What did you say to him, Eric?” Minwoo turned to look at him, his face neutral as he reaches to unfold Eric’s hands from the painful fists they are in.

Eric laughed, but it was a bitter sound, completely devoid of any joy. “I begged him to stay of course. Said it was okay if he didn’t love me as long as he stayed. That I couldn’t let him go.” His voice shook as he spat the words out like a foul taste he couldn’t stand. “I said I loved him and he laughed at me. He threw his head back and laughed like it was the funniest thing he ever heard. Then he walked out of the restaurant.”

Minwoo sat silently, his brain spun and his stomach churned like a storm at sea. He didn’t speak for what seemed a long time before he put a string of words together carefully, like he was stringing beads.

“Maybe it’s for the best, Eric. You can’t keep him like a bird trapped in a cage. No sense in making two people miserable.”

Eric nodded and brought his hands together, twisting them, his gaze down as he absorbed Minwoo’s words. “Can……. can I stay here tonight? I can’t go back to that house, our house, where we have so many memories together.”

Minwoo simply nodded, standing. “Of course, Eric. You know you can stay here as long as you need to.” He headed for the bedroom to get Eric something to sleep in and spare pillows and blankets so Eric can sleep on the couch. He came back to the living room, where Eric was staring at the television, watching but not really watching at the same time. He handed him the things.

“I’m going to bed now, Eric, if you need anything let me know,” Eric nods, the clothes sitting on his lap.

Minwoo headed to his room and laid down on the bed. He listened carefully, to see if Eric called to him before closing his eyes.

Eric laid on the couch in the living room, the clothes Minwoo gave him crumpled on the floor. He’s got the pillows clutched in front of him, his arms squeezing them tight. His eyes stared at nothing, even though the television is still on. His body trembled as he tried to fall asleep but his mind kept going back to the look on Hyesyung’s face. He never dreamed he would see such a look of contempt on the face of the man he loved. His hand scrubbed across his face, trying to erase the image like words on a blackboard. He sighed and sat up, the blanket draped around his shoulders like a cloak. After much internal debate he stood and walked slowly to Minwoo’s bedroom. The light was off and he crept in slowly and stood by the bed before he carefully laid down next to the smaller man’s sleeping form. He laid on his back staring up at the ceiling, trying to fall asleep. Slowly, carefully, trying not to move the bed too much he rolled over and put his face close to Minwoo’s and watched as he slept. He reached out one hand and ran a finger along Minwoo’s jawline, feeling the stubble. Minwoo’s eyes flicked open and he turned his head to look at Eric. If there had been more light, Eric would have seen the longing in them.

Minwoo spoke softly, as his eyes tried to gather whatever available light they could so they could see the man beside him. “What do you need, Eric?”

Without a moment of thought, Eric moved his head and pressed his lips to Minwoo’s and waited for him to pull away. To his surprise Minwoo reached over and placed his hand on Eric’s cheek and pressed his lips to his and a strangled moan slipped from his lips and it made Eric tremble. He moved over Minwoo quickly, his body pressing Minwoo to the bed gently. The kiss deepened and Minwoo’s head spun. He’s wanted this for as long as he can remember. He rolled swiftly, Eric’s body the one now pressed against the mattress as Minwoo continued to kiss Eric, his hands by Eric’s head as he braced himself over him. Eric’s hands moved to Minwoo’s back and slipped under his shirt, running lightly up the warm, firm skin of his back. His wedding ring, cold and hard, brushes against Minwoo’s back. Minwoo felt the cold metal on his skin and pulled back, panting, his mind suddenly very clear. He took Eric's hand gently and slipped the wedding band from his finger and threw it over his shoulder and the sound of it hitting the floor rang through the room. He smiled softly and leaned back down and kissed him one last before moving to lay beside him as his heart raced. Eric laid there, totally still, as he panted hard. He whispered sadly as a tear ran down his cheek.

“You…. you don’t even want me. I need comfort and you won’t let me have it, with you, one of my closest friends.”

Minwoo heard the sadness in his voice and rolled over onto his side and placed his hand on Eric’s chest.

“More than you know, Eric more than you know.” He whispered, the words that have been held back for years, the words he buried deep inside. “But not tonight, Eric…. not like this. I want to be more than a comfort to you. I want you to want me the way I have wanted you all these years.”

Eric opened his mouth to speak, “What do you….” But Minwoo pressed his finger gently to Eric’s lips, shushing him.

“We don’t have to talk about it tonight. Tonight we sleep. Tomorrow is a brand new day.” With this he rolled over and rested his head on Eric’s chest. “Just close your eyes and sleep, Eric. I’ve waited this long, I can wait a little longer.”

They lay there silently, their breathing soft as they both play the scene over and over in their heads until they at last fall asleep, their breaths matched and their hearts beating together in unison.