Words couldn’t describe how happy Jayoung was to be back in Youngbae’s apartment. The place just felt like home to her. Her heart felt at home. She pulled on the sleep clothes Youngbae gave her, momentarily bringing the collar of the sweatshirt to her nose and inhaling deeply. It smelled just like the male. Not just like his cologne, but like the male in general. His soap, his shampoo, his home. He smelt of old books and cinnamon lattes, and she couldn't have loved the combination more. A slight blush on her cheeks as she let go of the shirt, suddenly understanding how weird this looked. She turned off the lights to the bedroom, climbing into the bed and pulling the blankets up. Even the bed smelled of him, and she was so happy she didn’t know if she could sleep with how fast her heart was beating. There was a small smile on her lips as she thought of the male, fingers trailing down the soft sheets. There was a slight longing in her heart, for him to still be here with her. Jayoung stretched out an arm to the far side of the bed with a wistful sigh. There was so much room, it was a big bed. Both could fit comfortably in this bed together. . .

Jayoung’s cheeks flushed at the thought of Youngbae being in the same bed as her, quickly retracting her arm. It was stupid to think like that.

But. . .

Her fingers tangled in the bedsheets as her mind flashed back to the moment before Jiyong burst through the door. His warm, calloused hands had grasped hers ever so gently, a small giggle in and her nose scrunching. His breath had smelled like garlic, from the pizza. But she could get past that. She could still feel his presence, eyes closing like they did when he had leaned in. What would have happened, had Jiyong not shown up? Would they have kissed?

Would it just stop at kissing?

She had murmured this last thought underneath her breath, her blood growing cold at the thought. Her only experience was with her abusive ex, and that wasn’t the most pleasant experience. Her breath hitched in as she tried to shake away the memories. It had gotten a bit hard to breathe, her mind reeling over the thoughts.

“No. No, no no no no no no no” She muttered repeatedly, fingers clutching the bed, refusing to give in to delirium. “He can’t hurt me anymore. He can’t hurt me anymore. He. . .”

“He can’t hurt you anymore” A soft voice interjected, fingers running through her hair to show her face, strands clinging to the tears that she was unaware had fallen. She turned her head, focusing on the figure. A familiar scent clung to the male, one she had begun to identify as home. Jayoung slowly sat up, arms wrapping tightly around the male as she rested her head against his chest, regulating her breathing.

“Wh. . .when?” She tried to gather her thoughts, mind still fuzzy as she looked up at Youngbae. She cradled his hand to her cheek, eyes closed. Youngbae could feel the wet tears, but her shaking was slowly subsiding.

Youngbae sat down in the bed beside her, free hand gently tugging her over into his embrace. “I wasn’t asleep yet, and you sounded distressed. Plus, Daesung was hogging the bed” A soft chuckle left his mouth, stopping short as he felt the tears beginning to flow again. “Jayoung?” He questioned, slightly panicked by the tears.

“Why haven’t you been answering my calls?” Her voice wavered as she sniffed, wiping her nose on her hand. “You blocked my number. You. . .you pretended like I never existed in your life, and now you just show up out of nowhere” Youngbae was confused, running his fingers down her arm.

“Jayoung? What do you mean? I didn’t block your number. I just saw you for the first time. . .” He broke off when her hand hit his chest, although it was like a feather.

“Don’t lie to me! You know what you’ve been doing!” Jayoung was beginning to grip his arms tightly. “Why did you do that?”

“Do wh-” He was interrupted yet again by her ranting.

“I tried to visit you. I tried to apologise. But you. . .you just slammed the door in my face. You left me crying on your doorstep. Why. . .why did you do that, Seunghyun?” Youngbae’s body chilled when he heard the name, tilting up her chin to look down at her. Her eyes were closed. Was she dreaming? Did she sleep talk? As he tilted up her chin she leaned in, pressing a kiss to his lips. Her lips were just as soft as he hoped, so tender and full of love. But not for him. This kiss was bitter; this kiss wasn’t intended for him. This kiss was for Seunghyun, the name that now held so much hate in his heart. He couldn’t understand as to why she still pined for him. He gently pulled back from her kiss, placing a hand on her cheek to stop her from chasing after his lips.

“I’m sorry” He mumbled softly, gently laying her down on the bed. “Go back to sleep, Jayoung. We’ll speak in the morning” Youngbae doubted she would remember this when she woke.

“Will you stay with me?” Jayoung asked, her grip still tight on his arm, shifting to hold his hand.

“Of course. I’ll always be with you, darling” He her cheek with his free hand, sitting down beside her on the floor. Tears escaped as he rested his forehead against the side of the mattress, dampening the sheets. Even now, far after the seeds of disappointment had been planted within her, Youngbae was still not the one she wanted. Not after tonight, not after all she was told about Seunghyun’s recent behaviour, she still hadn’t let go. In Youngbae’s eyes, Seunghyun wasn’t much better than her ex. He still mistreated her, treated her like dirt, acted like she didn’t exist. But maybe that’s why she loved Seunghyun; he loved her the way she knew love. Youngbae was the opposite; he loved her the way she should have been loved. Her grip slowly loosened on his hand and his hand slid out of her grasp as she rolled over. Finally bringing himself to stand, one last heartbroken glance was casted at the sleeping female before he exited the room. He came back into the spare bedroom, slipping into the free space beside Daesung. It was silent as he settled under the cover, turning his back to the sleeping male.

“I’m sorry, hyung” Daesung murmured softly, shifting to stare at the male’s back. Youngbae blinked in surprise, quickly dashing away his tears.

“So, you heard it?” He mumbled, turning to look at the other. Daesung nodded solemnly, reaching out to grasp his shoulder gently.

“I. . .I can’t begin to comprehend the pain you’re in. But. . .I’m here. I’m sorry you must go through this. But I’m here” Daesung tugged the elder into a hug, squeezing him tightly as he pretended to not notice the tears, knowing Youngbae would feel ashamed. “She feels love for you too, I can tell. Maybe. . .she’s just not used to the kind of love you have for her” He let go of him, smiling his kind-hearted smile at him. “Go to sleep now, yeah? Get some rest. It’s going to be an interesting morning. I feel it in my heart” And with that the younger rolled over, eyes closing as he soon drifted back off to sleep.

Youngbae repeated Daesung’s words in his mind, fists clenching. He was determined to show Jayoung that his love was real, it was a healthy love. He was damned if he was going to let Seunghyun scare her away this time. With those thoughts he fell back asleep, his heart slightly eased from pain.