Jiyong: you know

Jiyong: you'll be a hypocrite if you shut me down now

Seunghyun: I'm not shutting you down

Jiyong: you'll be a hypocrite if you shut yourself down

Jiyong: that counts, too

Seunghyun: now you're threatening me? guilt-trip me?

Jiyong: anything to make you talk

Seunghyun: at least act like you're ashamed

Jiyong: no

Seunghyun: what do you want to talk about?

Jiyong: anything

Jiyong: what you need? what do you want? I'll give it to you

Seunghyun: you can't give me what I want

Jiyong: you couldn't either, remember?

Seunghyun: I do

Seunghyun: I am a ing hypocrite

Seunghyun: I'm sorry

Jiyong: as someone who has been where you are right now, I promise

Jiyong: it goes away. It does get better. Also, it isn't as bad as you think it is

Seunghyun: maybe it's not always the same

Jiyong: maybe

Jiyong: but I had you

Jiyong: now you have me

Jiyong: that will never change

Jiyong: I already have tons of ty ideas to ease you back in

Seunghyun: I'm out, aren't I?

Jiyong: not for me

Seunghyun: I'm scared

Jiyong: I know

Seunghyun: I'm sorry

Jiyong: I know

Seunghyun: You don't know what I'm apologizing for 

Jiyong: I think I do

Seunghyun: you know the worst thing?

Seunghyun: after a while, I actually stopped feeling so bad 

Seunghyun: I do feel bad, but not all the time. 

Seunghyun: and I hide my shame. I act like I don't feel it

Jiyong: that is your self-defence instinct kicking in

Jiyong: you ed up. You feel bad, but you can't live the rest of your life beating yourself over it

Jiyong: let's say you'll live for another 60 years. You're not even halfway there. Just one third of your life

Jiyong: you can't let this be the thing that ends you

Jiyong: you did so many awesome things. you ed up. It shouldn't erase all of your life

Seunghyun: I ed up a lot with you

Jiyong: that is another matter

Jiyong: and this shouldn't be happening to you

Seunghyun: Yeah, well, I did that. I can't really complain about it

Jiyong: you could. I'll listen

Jiyong: do you know how mad Youngbae is? not at you

Jiyong: I didn't expect it from him, to be honest

Jiyong: and I feel bad about underestimating him like that but

Jiyong: I felt so proud and lucky

Jiyong: he loves you

Jiyong: he doesn't care what anyone says

Seunghyun: how am I suppose to face him now?

Jiyong: you weren't angry at me when I ed up

Jiyong: you weren't angry at anyone when they ed up. Again and again

Jiyong: there is no life without ing up now and then

Jiyong: it is just that ours get...known. 

Jiyong: but you're not done, you hear me?

Seunghyun: I think I am, Jiyong

Jiyong: I thought so, too

Seunghyun: I feel dirty. Like... I'm not worthy 

Jiyong: hey

Jiyong: come out

Seunghyun: to where?

Jiyong: anywhere

Seunghyun: aren't you busy?

Jiyong: no

Jiyong: really. come out. anywhere you wanna go, let's go

Seunghyun: aren't you afraid?

Jiyong: no, it

Seunghyun: I do wanna get out

Jiyong: I know

Seunghyun: you're acting real cool, you know that?

Jiyong: I know you

Seunghyun: don't you hate me?

Jiyong: no

Jiyong: you'll see. meet up now? where do you want me to go? 

Jiyong: I can pick you up if you want

Seunghyun: I don't know. I wanted to go out but I didn't really think about actually going out

Seunghyun: do you have any idea?

Jiyong: I do

Update on me. One

I decided to start writing little notes whenever I update now, hopefully at least one or two of you will be interested in my life lol

So I spilled coffee on my laptop and killed it. Nice, right? ^^ 

But I ordered a king size blanket just now. Along with a completely white sheet, which is gonna be a new thing for me. 

I started doing yoga. I love it I love it I love it. 

Dinner was so good, I ate way too much. Guh.