“Remind yourself there are two people inside a relationship. If you started thinking it’s all about you, or started doing things for yourself, then it’s done.”

Jin opens his eyes as he felt someone’s in front of him, staring. And there comes that sunshine. His sunshine. “Taehyung.”

“Jin hyung, how long have you been here?” He asked worriedly, sitting beside me.

He tilted his head, trying to think when did he arrived at the rooftop. “About an hour ago? My class ended early.”

“What? But it rained earlier!” Taehyung’s widened eyes glared at him.

He just shrugged and bring out the two lunch boxes in his bag. “I just thought that I’d wait here for you. It’s our first lunch together after all.”

“W-Why do you have to do that… You should’ve just…” He fidgets and lowered his head. It was a really cute part of him, he did it the first time they’ve known each other. Yoongi and Namjoon were Jin’s friend and Hoseok, Jimin and Jungkook was Taehyung’s. Hoseok and Yoongi introduced them with each other (since that two were already dating) and since then, they started to hang out a bit.

“Aigoo, don’t mind me. Here, I cooked for you.” He said, opening the lid and offering him the food.

“Wow, these smells good.”

“That tastes even better.”

Taehyung mumbled a ‘thank you’ and flashed him a smile. And Jin thought that they are doing well even with unsure feelings.

~~~~

“Hyung, are you sure you’re okay?”

He nodded. “Yep. Thank you for walking with me again. Don’t worry. You should go home, it’s getting late.”

“O-Okay…” Taehyung looked at him with worried eyes and there’s hesitation about going home or staying with him. He had to smile at him so the frown in his face would fade and Taehyung smiled back before walking away.

“I’m gonna do fine.” He mumbled to himself as he stepped towards the house and dropped himself to the bed and slept, not even bothering to change clothes. Well not until he woke up and felt really cold, with his head like being hit with a hammer, and his throat dry.

I’m not sick. I swore I won’t get sick again. I don’t want this. I have to—

The door at his room suddenly flung open. He tried to stare at the figure with his heavy eyes and there’s… Taehyung.

“You said you’re fine and told me not to worry. Now here you are having a hard time.” He said as he went straight beside the bed and pulls out some things in a plastic bag.

“H-How… did you get in?”

“You left the door unlocked. Ugh. You haven’t even changed—Wait, I just bought you instant noodles since I’m not yet that good in the kitchen. I’ll just cook this, okay?”

He tried opening his mouth for protest, but he can’t. He wants to say he should just stay there. Just there. In his side. And then he was gone before he even dragged the words out of him.

After a while, he came back, with a basin and towel and gestured me to sit. Taehyung pulled Jin’s shirt over his head and started running the warm towel in his chest and arms. Jin chuckled, definitely enjoying the flush in Taehyung’s face.

“Yah, don’t laugh at me. Or I’ll put poison in your food.” He pouted.

“I’m not laughing at you. Why did you come back?” Jin asked, his heart hoping that maybe Taehyung was starting to feel something for him. Even just a little, it would be fine.

“Well, you really look like you’re about to faint earlier. I just bought those in the convenience store before I went here.” Then he grabbed a shirt at the chair, and told him to wear it.

“Thank you.”

Taehyung pouted. “We’re dating and I’m your boyfriend. This is something I really should do for you.”

Jin cleared his throat, trying to suppress the grin and then looked away to hide the redness of his face. The sound of them dating and Taehyung as his boyfriend was so nice that he was starting to find his melody. He was starting to find the form of his own song, his own feelings.

Taehyung walked again to the kitchen, holding the basin and then coming back with a bowl of noodles. “You should eat all of this before taking your medicine.”

After doing those, Taehyung helped him lie down again at the bed. “Sleep now, okay? I’ll go home. Call me tomorrow if you’re already feeling well. If not, I’ll barge in here again.” He smiled and turned his back on me.

Stay. His mind protested so before Taehyung could even take a step, he grabbed his wrist and pulled him gently. “Taehyung…”

“Why?” He asked, and squats beside him.

“S-Stay. Please, stay with me.”

Taehyung looked at him for a while and then nods gently. “Okay, I’ll stay here with you.”

“You won’t leave?”

“I won’t.” Taehyung said as his both hands held my hand. “So sleep now, okay?”

He sighed contentedly and nodded before closing his eyes and drifting back to sleep.

~~~

After some hours, he woke up again, feeling a lot lighter and better. His eyes automatically searched for Taehyung and there he was, sleeping beside him, his hands still holding his. He turned sideways and cupped his face.

“Hyung...?” Taehyung called sleepily and suddenly jolted as he realized Jin was already awake. He sat and bombarded him with questions. “Are you okay now? I’m sorry I slept here, the bed was really spacey and I’m sleepy. Do you want anything? Water, hyung? Or are you hungry?”

“…ou.”

“Eh? What?” Taehyung asked and leaned on him so he’d hear his words a little better.

“I want… you.” He whispered and suddenly pulled Taehyung in a kiss. He doesn’t know how to explain the feeling, but his heart was beating really fast like it could go out of his chest anytime. Not like the first time they met, or the times that Taehyung smiles at him. It was so different this time but he welcomed that strange feeling. He didn’t even believe at those butterflies and sparks until he kissed Taehyung.

He rolled on top of him and held both of Taehyung’s hands in his side. He nibbled his lower lip and tilted his head, trying to make the kiss deeper. However, he felt Taehyung wasn’t responding. He stopped.

“W-What are you doing hyung…” He asked, his eyes tearing a little.

“I’m…” Jin lets go of Taehyung’s wrist, leaving a red imprint of his tight grip. I’m sorry.

He backed towards the wall.

“Hyung… I am really trying to make this thing work out. But if you at least like me, then you’d consider what I wanted to do. Or the things that I’m still not ready for.” Taehyung said, his lips quivering.

“I…I’m sorry…” Jin covered his face with his hands. He felt an unbelievable weight in his chest. He hates himself. He just hated himself for not considering Taehyung in his decisions. Again. And maybe in the next days with him, he’ll do the same. So it’ll be better if he’s the only one hurting. Maybe it’s better to end this.

But then… he felt Taehyung’s arms encircled in him. “It’s okay, hyung. Just don’t do it again without asking me, okay? I told you, I’m trying to work this out. We can do this properly.”

…Why? Why are you being like this…? I was ready to let you go. But here you are again… letting me to raise the stakes some more.

…Or maybe he doesn’t really want to let go, he wanted Taehyung to say he’ll stay, that he’ll always be there. And that’s enough reason for him to keep holding on.

He raised his hand and hugged Taehyung back tightly. “Thank you.”

They can definitely make this thing work out.

And maybe he should start with realizing his own feelings.