[Author Note]

A long chapter to make up with the lack of the update.

As always, i didn't re-read to check any typo and grammar mistake because it was past midnight here lol.

***

The bright arctic hue that I expected to be around was now disappear; replaced by clouds. The day that I thought would be great turned out to be an uncomfortable one. Standing awkwardly at the sideway of roads, waiting for the green light to turn green, here I am few feets away from Sweet Treats. Besides me standing tall; Lee Taeyong, with the usual straight face he has.

The toller rang as I entered Sweet Treats; gaining attention from table number twelve.

“She’s back! Oh but--” I could heard Lina; with a hurry tone on her voice that changed into a bright one when she realized that I’m not coming all alone.

“Hi Taeyong! What’s bring you here?” she said. “Oh, Tae. I thought you refused when I asked you to come with me?” this time; Hansol greeted him, wriggling his eyebrows. “Just passed by” he replied in an un-amused tone.

After handing Hansol a copy for my notes, we sit there ina group of four and having a small chat. The atmosphere in Sweet Treats has been always cozy and comfy and so does this time. But without me knowing, my chest feels stuffy and my mind is lost in thoughts. “Hey! Are you going to stare at the road for the whole day and ignoring the existence of three of us?” Lina hit my forehead lightly and I finally gained my attention back. “What?” ; “See, you don’t even listening!” ; “Sorry, I- kind of have a mini-headache. What are you guys talking about?” ; “You shouldn’t have ordered a iced beverage, not when after you got some rain on your crown, little girl.” Hansol said, and I could feel Lina tensed up with the mention of the words Little Girl which Hansol referring to me. I only looked at him and give him a small smile that followed by an eye-roll. “Kidding; I know my place, right, Tae?” I don’t know what he was talking about but Lina is surely smiled this time but Taeyong gives no respone. “Anyway, I need to go right now, anyone wants a free ride?” ; “Lina needs it. Her parents aren’t home and she didn’t bring umbrella.” This time I answered in a speed of light. “How about you?” ; “I could-“ ; “Oh right, Tae is here. See you guys around.” I didn’t try to argue like I use to do, and with that; the two left us. Although so far the day hasn’t been the best for me, but at least I could make it better for someone else.

Seven minutes. Seven minutes has passed since I was left alone with Taeyong. None of us try to initiate a conversation; the atmosphere is sure comfortable in Sweet Treats, but the silence between us makes me feel even more stuffy. Sighing to myself, I looked up from my beverage cup to Taeyong, who is undoubtly have been staring right into me but not to bother to say a word.

“Taeyong.” I called out his name, but he didn’t budge and I take that as permission to me to continue “Taeyong, listen. I-“ only barely three words, but then turned away, now looking at the road aside. I didn’t really understand him, if he didn’t want to hear me, why did he stay? Why did he do not stop me from the moment I called his name? “Taeyong.” I repeated, and again he didn’t response. “Taeyong I- forget it, I’m going home.” I’m not really a cool person in this kind of situation, so when he decided to continue with the silent treatment, I decided to let him be. Just a second after I got up from my seat, he reach for my wrist, stopping me.

“Have you decided to not ignore me?” he said. “What?”

“That’s how I feel. Being ignored all the time. I do understand how annoying I could be in the school.”

“Taeyong-“

“But when I say I’m serious, that means I’m dead serious. You could ignore me when I’m just playing around. Do you know how do I feel for the past three days?” ; “Taeyong-“ ; “My friend is getting a reply in a mere minute and I don’t even get any, even after two days. I know it’s just a mere of text messages. I thought it’s because I didn’t tell you who am I at the first time, but when I did, you just continue to ignore it.”

“Taeyong, listen-“

“And the silent treatment I did for the mere ten minutes just now, that makes you annoyed and can’t stand it. That’s how I feel. Even worse than that because you clearly know that I have feelings for you! Don’t you get it?!”

By the end of his sentence, he was half-shouting. Not that loud but I could feel the person from two tables away is staring. I didn’t say anything in response, I just stared at him. Dumbfounded and shock obviously drawn on my face, and I only blinked for a few times. He let go of my now pretty red wrist, from the hard grip he did, and I took a step back. His expression softened after seconds; realizing what just he did, and also because he see the image of my face. A mix of confuse and fear. If in this world there are things that I hate and scared of; one of them are being yelled. “Sorry”, he tried to reach my shoulder, but then again I unconsciously took a step back. “I- I want to-to go home.” I said, stuttering without my will. Taking a few steps back, then I turned my heels to the cafe door. Only few steps after I exited the cafe, I could feel the same exact grip on my wrist again, but this time much more gentle. “It’s raining. Bring the umbrella.” With that, he handed me the dark blue umbrella, and I went home with that.

Monday came faster than it usually did. The first day of exam; Biology for the first period and Mathematics for the second one. Although I often found myself out of focus during studying on Saturday and the whole Sunday, I did make sure that I didn’t miss a thing for the exam. Biology was okay and I think I did good on Mathematics. My school has this system of getting our grade announced at the same day at the exam. We did the exam with a computer program which is make it easier for the teacher to do the scoring. We only need to wait for another thirty minutes after the second period of exam ends; and the score will be out. The students eagerly went to bulletin board where the scores are being shown. Either good or bad; your score will be shown together with your name.

Biology; 89/100. Mathematics 94/100. That’s a relief.

The second day was Civil and Chemistry. 82/100; 91/100. We don’t have an official exam for English since we got the project; but they also show the score on the board, together with another subject that was being tested that day, History. I and lina did great on our project; we get the highest point amongst our classmates; 99/100. And me myself; do not did really bad in History either; 83/100.

The fourth day was the most fun things to learn for me; Music and Chinese. 90/100 for music. And I’m pretty surprised when I see my own score for Chinese. 100/100. The highest score and I was the only one that got a perfect score on our batch. “How the hell you did really good on every subjects! I’m glad we paired up for English, so I got your luck a bit.” Lina nudged me after we went to the see the score. “You’re not so bad yourself; you got pretty high scores too. Besides; I’m not lucky, but I studied!” I smiled to her; jokingly sticking out my toungue. “Whatever. But I really didn’t expect you to got a perfect score on Chinese! I do understand your English is good since well; you lived abroad for few years, but did you secretly speak Chinese at Canada?” I laughed at her remark. “Me neither; didn’t expect the score would be perfect? I just for some reasons understand Chinese better and faster than you guys?” after small chat; we returned to our class; gathering our belongings and ready to leave. I was in a happy mood about my score until I realized that tomorrow is Physic’s exam. I started to get quite and I guess my anxious was visible enough to Lina. “Hey, what’s wrong?” ; “Nothing, just- Tomorrow, you know, physics. I barely understand about the materials and i-” I unconsiouly grow panic.

“Chill, baby. You did great the whole week and I’m pretty sure you will do the same for physics. Remember, what you said, you studied, right? Studying a little bit more of it and I’m sure you’re going to pass.” She smiled at me. She sure knew me; never once in my quizzes or regular exams; I got good score on physics. The best I could get was only 68, and that was from open-book exam, once.

“If you have problem with the materials; we could study together?” ; “Are you sure for inviting me..?”. She nodded in reply. Lina is a smart girl; her score might be lower than me, but she understands things easily. Like frankly speaking; if we both got the same score for our tests; it will only take her like three hours of study; meanwhile I need to focus for at least five hours straight.

“So, are you coming or not?” she asked playfully. “But Lin-“ ; “Nah, it’s okay. You’re coming to my house, okay? We could study together!” with that, she grabbed my arm and we went straight to her house. We both know that Lina is not the type to study together with other people; not when it’s day minus one to the exam. But she was really being so considerate towards me. I’m really blessed, am I?

We started at three and ended the study sessions at eight. Lina was extremely patient with me; she was explaining every little details that I didn’t understand. Since it’s getting late, I decided to go home. Besides, I’m pretty much sure that Lina needed a good sleep, she looked tired but still managed to gave her best smile. “If you didn’t understand any part, just text me, okay? Or video call me! And don’t force youself, your eyes and face screamed for a sleep! Be careful on your way home!” and again, she still managed to cheer me up. “Like you didn’t need one, Lin? Hahah thank you, anyway. I’ll get going then, see you tomorrow!”

That night, I continued to study till three in the morning. I didn’t want to miss any materials; even if I ended up with not understanding it fully, at least I need to know some parts of it.

The crisp sound of the little bird greeted my ears; indicating the morning has arrived. 06:07. I guess due my anxiousness; I even woke up before my alarm rang. I didn’t waste any time and started to get ready for the school immediately. The exam will start at 8:30 but I was already on my seat on 7:10. I put my headphones on; and started reviewing some materials that I still didn’t understand. I was too focused and didn’t even notice that class was almost full. Lina tapped my shoulder, “Hey, chill a bit. Just do your best, okay? You looks like you are about burts into tears!”  and it was only when I realized that it was only five minutes before the exam started.

The physics exam ended in a blink of eye, and I can’t think straight. I feel like I did my best but at the same time I also feel like I didn’t do enough. The noon arrived faster that it usually did; when the score was up on the board, most of the students were running to see theirs. I was usually a part of them, but this time I choose to wait. After the crowd loosen up, I made my way to the board. Quietly searching my name, I gathered my courage to look at the score.

49/100

Did I see it right? Yeah, I saw it right, and clear. I didn’t even get half of the questions right. Haha, what a failure. I stood there for a mere seconds, trying to accept that even with my best effort, I still failed the physics. Or was the physics that failed me?

Lina offered me to go out but I declined, I knew she was going to cheer me up without bringing up the subject matters, but I just need to be alone. I’m pretty much disappointed with myself. Why do I even  care that much, when it’s just a mere score or exam? It really matters. Since it was my last year on high school; the score will affect my future university entrance. I was aiming for a scholarship; and more than that it was for Faculty of Science and Technology, which is why physics is important.

I gathered my things and went straight to the school gates, unconsiouly ignoring my surrounding due my thoughts. “Hey!” ; a hand pulled my shoulder, making me turn around. Meeting the eyes of the hand’s owner, I was surprised with the sudden action and I don’t know why I took a step back, again. “Are you deaf or something? I called you-“

***

The next day, I went to Sweet Treats. The nerves stimulant of methylxanthine seems working on me; but it only gave life for my eyes and andrenaline, not my mind, the caffeine. Another cup of two shots of Iced Americano.

As a normal human being; I tried my best to keep myself to have a positive vibes, or a positive mind at least. But the things happened nowadays just seems not going on my way.

“Stop. It’s your fourth cup.” a hand snatched the dark cupped liquid from my hand. I didn’t even bother to look up. “It’s only an exam; more than that, it’s only one subject out of around dozen other that we have. You don’t need to be so depressed about it.”

“Don’t bother me this time, please? I beg you.”

“I’m not trying to bother you, I’m just being concerned. Do you hate me that much?” the last question made me shot my head up, looking at him straight into the eyes. The look on his eyes were sincere, and kind of filled with hurt.

“I don’t hate you, Lee Taeyong. Not even a bit.” I said, slowly. “But I can’t force myself to like you in an instant, either. You know, it takes time for me to get closer with someone, so-”

“Thank you.” ; “What?” ; “Thank you. Thank you for not hating on me. And I understand if you can’t like me in an instant.” he smiled, and I was puzzled. “I’m sorry for my attitude towards you. As what I said last week.. I.. kind of like you?” he was blushing, this was definitely another new thing of him. “Okay that was awkward. This is not a confession but at the same time it is? Well.. what I was trying to say is, I have this interest on you.. But you don’t need to answer- I mean- well, just give me a chance? Not that kind of chance but-” he was so sincere and was stuttering a mess, and that made me smile.

“Listen, Taeyong.” I cut him out, poor the kid. “Also thank you for understanding what I mean. I know our.. relationship? Have been not the best, but I do understand what you mean.”

That was probably the most courteous thing that happened between us.

“So.. will you give me a chance? I mean.. we could start at being.. friends? Like yeah normal friends?” he said. He was being extremely sincere, and I kind of surprised on how much effort he gave. “As long as it didn’t harm us, why not?” I replied and smiled. “But now.. I really need to study for the remedial. So if you excuse..” ; “Physics? I can help you, though. Didn’t mean to show off but.. I got 96/100.” I was dumbfounded with that he just said. Did he just say that he almost got all the questions right? Is that even possible?

“How did you-“

“Lina actually told me everything. Well, not everything but most of it. So are you going to accept my kind offer or just continue being your stubborn self?” he wriggled his eyebrows.

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier that you were an expert in physics- Oh my God-“

“You looked like you were going to kill anyone who bothers you. Do you even realize that I have been waiting like hours? Well forget that, shall we start?” again, he showed his genuine smile. “Do you understand this problem?” I waste no time and immediately asked him. “Wow chill; I didn’t say that we shall start with the physics, though. Shall we start.. of us?” he cheekily grinned. “Oh my God, Lee Taeyong.” ; “Kidding. Which number? This one? It’s pretty easy, you just need to calculate the temperature first and then..”

Maybe, Lee Taeyong wasn’t so bad. Maybe things will get better as the time goes on. Maybe.

***

Hi!!!!!

As what I said, it was a longgg chapter. 3k+ words yeay.

Sorry for the lack of the updates; school got me like o<-<

Please do comment and give me a feedback about the story!

I might need a beta reader to check my typos and grammar error because i was too lazy to double check

Thank you for reading and patiently waiting!

Enjoy!

xx