I never really like open forums because rather than solving issues it creates more issues; it creates more conflict. Like what is happening now. I know I should have not said that to her. I should have not let my emotions go over me or the peer pressure. Now she had found herself to someone else, someone who reciprocates what she gives and I? I just stand and watch her smile to everyone. I have never felt winter as cold as she treats me. It all started that night, the night when Nayeon Unnie and Jungyeon Unnie was having some sort of issue about something I barely remember, they were being cold to each other and Jihyo Unnie noticed it so she called everyone in the living room for a meeting. Everyone attended wearing our sleeping wears; I brought Minjoo with me and hugged him because it was past my sleep time. Dahyun Unnie brought her book with her because she was still studying while Chaeyoung sat beside me half asleep. Jungyeon and Momo Unnie were sitting side by side and Sana and Mina Unnie were talking. I was observing everyone and I stopped my head from moving and focused on Sana Unnie, she might have felt that I was looking at her so she gave me her cute smile and I nodded as my response.

“Tzuyu – yah are you sleepy?” She asked with her alluring voice as she went on my side and ruffled my hair. She is always like this, sweet and touchy. Well, I really don’t care if she does those things to me.. Or maybe I actually do. I don’t like what it makes me feel as if I feel butterflies in my stomach and it is confusing to be honest, so I rather not respond to her actions. I nodded and she smiled at me and pat her shoulders asking me to lean on it, I paused to look at her, then she smiled patting her shoulder once more.. and offering that sweet caring smile….there it is again a sort of feeling that I don’t know where it is coming from. I gulped before I did, and she pats my head lightly, I like the feeling she makes me feel, I can’t explain what her touch does to me. I feel my blood rushing in my veins for no reason and it only happens when Sana Unnie is near me.

“Okay.” Jihyo Unnie appeared like a real leader with soda and some food followed by Nayeon Unnie. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at Jihyo Unnie. I paid my gaze to the leader’s direction too. “What it is Jihyo? I need to do something.” A bitter tone came out from Jungyeon Unnie which is really rare. I feel that she was glaring over to Nayeon Unnie, who felt embarrassed.

“Yah! Jungyeon talk to her with respect she is our leader duh.” Momo Unnie said. Too much for having problems with leadership huh, yeah, the interview with a lie detector test says it all.

“Thanks Momo but I still remember that interview so stop trying to act like that.” Jihyo answered. We all chuckled with the comment as Momo Unnie lower her head and put her hand on her face as she shook her head.

“Are we going to watch some movie? I need to study really.” Dahyun Unnie stated and she was to stand up.

“Yah Dahyun. Sit!” Jihyo Unnie ordered, I have never seen her like this, then she took a deep breath. “Mina! Stop using your phone!” Jihyo Unnie ordered and Mina Unnie did as what she said after glaring. Sana Unnie chuckled.

“I am not joking here Sana..” Jihyo Unnie looked at her and I felt that she feels guilty so she bowed and she held my hand for support I guess and I hold it back. Intense heartbeat is happening gosh... what is this?

“I called everyone because we need to get ourselves together, I mean we act so close with cameras but we really act differently at home.. We have some issues to each other that we feel awkward or just keep on minding our own business we need to be who we try to project for our fans and also for ourselves.” Jihyo Unnie stated.

“I suggested this to her so we can know what are the things we should improve on interacting to each other, like an open forum because I, for one, often gets mad at some of you guys and I don’t want it to become such a big issue, it is like tell us what you not like at each other and we can probably improve ourselves?” Nayeon Unnie said looking at Jungyeon Unnie.

“Oh okay, this sounds exciting.” Dahyun Unnie said like she was going to watch real housewives of New York in 4D.

“Who wants to start?” Chaeyoung asked and she smiled too, suddenly she is no longer sleepy.

“I will start!” Mina Unnie said. We all look at her, we were so shock that she initiates to talk about something which she rarely does. “Actually it is solved.” She smiled with her gums showing. “What was your issue Mina Chan?” Momo Unnie looks so much concern. “I hated it when no one looks at me or listen to me when I talk but now everyone is looking at me so it is solved.” She smiled with her crescent eyes. Everyone laughs.

“That is noted every time Mina Unnie started talking or open we should listen.” Chaeyoung said and nodding and everyone laugh, well she just looks funny.

“Mina you should also louden your voice because you may feel bad again, but to be honest sometimes we cannot just hear you.” Sana Unnie said smiling to her. “I will try that too..” Mina Unnie answered and she smiled back as Sana Unnie played with her fingers under her chin. I kept my head on her shoulder, I kind of not like the sight of Sana Unnie treating Mina Unnie like that.

“I hate when you guys eat and don’t throw your left overs I need to clean them.” Jungyeon Unnie said.

“No one asked you to do that though.” Nayeon Unnie said.

“But no one wants roaches here right? So you better start cleaning your mess!” Jungyeon Unnie countered.

“I will do that Unnie sorry, I was so tired that night.” Dahyun Unnie said smiling like Pikachu to her. Jungyeon Unnie just let out a loud sigh. “I will, I promise if I did not do that I will clean the whole house!” Dahyun Unnie said in exaggeration, well she does not want to clean this whole house for sure.. “Okay, Just next time.” Jungyeon Unnie said like a mother who believes her daughter. Then Sana Unnie met with Jungyeon’s eyes and she offered her a Y smile?! Really?! What is that for? I wanted to glare to Jungyeon Unnie but Chaeyoung who was sitting beside me started talking.

“Dahyun Unnie should clean starting now got that too!” Chaeyoung stated as if she is really notating everything.

“You should remove all the batteries of those stuff toys you have because it wakes me up at night when you stepped on it.” Dahyun Unnie said looking to Chaeyoung. “I will! NOTED.” Chaeyoung said and everyone laugh again. To be honest everything seems to be a petty stuff and it seems that all of us getting where Jihyo Unnie wants us to be, understanding each other.

“If you cannot sleep Dahyun ssi you can visit our room and sleep next to me.” Sana Unnie offered and Dahyun Unnie smiled so wide that I hate it, “Okay, I like the “fluffy you” like a bolster, so I think I can do that again...” WHAT?! HAD THEY SLEPT IN ONE BED? I know, I should not care about it but suddenly I feel mad at Dahyun Unnie.

“I hate it when everyone calls me stupid and clumsy, Sana is clumsier than me.” Nayeon Unnie stated, she pouted and we laughed.

“That is one thing we cannot change Nayeon Unnie, It is a fact .” Jihyo Unnie said. Sana Unnie and I were just listening to all the complains that our members have, well basically there is nothing much, I think we should do this often as we have a bunch of things to laugh about.

“I hate that people call me gay.” Momo Unnie then mentioned. “I like guys too it is just that I like girls more.” She added and Jungyeon Unnie laughed because whatever she just said means that she is really gay, whew in denial. “You are too touchy that is why people call you gay.” Nayeon Unnie said almost laughing. “But fans like that.” Momo Unnie countered. “Such a player.” Mina Unnie commented and rolled her eyes. “She is not Momo if she does not touch or flirts with anyone of us. Besides she is being shipped to everyone so just let her be it increases our popularity.” Sana Unnie said, the whole time she has never let go of my hand being laced to hers. Gosh, here it is again the confusing thud in my heart; I hugged Minjoo more to release some tension. But one thing I have hated is that she had been defending and being touchy to everyone. Gosh!

“So Momo chan just don’t mind them arraso?” Sana Unnie said winking at Momo Unnie.

“Sarangheo Sana Chan.” Momo Unnie said blowing a kiss to My Sana Unnie, oh I mean to Sana Unnie. I feel a little mad at Momo Unnie on what she did. “Oh Sana chan is the sweetest.” Nayeon Unnie then went to Sana Unnie’s side and hugged her, I put pressure on my head so she can only use one hand but that did not stop them from hugging. “Why are you so touchy?” I said lifting my head, I was supposed to have that in my mind but it slipped out, I was irritated and even glared at her, I can see she was so shock even all our members. As if everyone was so quiet and all of them was looking at me. I am the only one who raise a voice tonight and to someone older than me, nice one Tzuyu.

“Do -- you hate it when I am touchy?” She asked in a confirmation manner but as if she was struggling to deliver her words, I look at her and her hands are still around Nayeon unnie’s waist. My eyes fired up and said. “Yes! You always do skinship to everyone! Off Cam, On Cam.. Too much fan service it is suffocating!” Her eyes go around the place and she lets go of Nayeon Unnie and put her hands inside her jacket pocket. Then there was a moment of silent once again. I really don’t know what gotten in me. I feel sorry for shouting at her and for my outburst I opened my mouth to say something but I was cut off with her smile. “Okay Tzuyu yah, I will not be touchy to you anymore.” She said smiling but her eyes were glittering, as if she is abo