Yoo Young Geun stared. Rooted, mouth agaped. The woman at his doorstep, obviously oblivious to his countenace, attempted to do many things at once. Juggling with the many paper bags, parcels of food and God-knows-what, she smiled brightly, greeted him and merely let herself in, all the while huffing and puffing. He forgot his manners momentarily because of such sight and he does not know how his body automatically move to the side to allow her in without so much as offering to help.

But Mo Yeon had already brought the "stuff" to his dining. Closing his door and walking warily over, he briefly wondered how she managed to carry so many bags from her car to his front step with such a slender frame and nimble fingers. He eyed the paper bags and parcels now all over his table before looking at Mo Yeon, who is currently looking very pleased with herself and narrowed his eyes. 

Did she lose weight again?

Concerned, he lightly touched her arm, pulling her to attention.

"Mo Yeon-ah, are you eating well? You seem to lose weight again?"

She blinked and and he could clearly see she was caught surprised. It was just a brief moment the expression flashed, but he caught it. And it pull at his heartstrings. The seemingly endless vortex of ache, agony and anguish.

Yoo Si Jin's 1st death anniversary is in 2 weeks.

Of course she would bury it. "Mwo? Me? Of course! Ahjussi," she stressed, "I am on a diet. It is what a woman does when she wants to be slim and look beautiful."

He knew she knew he didn't buy it. And judging by her sudden embarassment, he also know that she knew he knew the actual reason. Not wanting to put her in such disposition, he played along and genuinely chided her. Worried.

"Mo Yeon-ah..You are beautiful enough. What are you trying to look like? A japanese bamboo?"

"Ani....Ahjussi...," she whined. "A japanese bamboo has no shape. I want to look like a Coca-Cola bottle,"she finished cheekily, her pointer finger drawing an S shape in the air.

He sighed, conflicted if he should just address the issue. She has already lost weight since the last time he saw her. He has no elequoence nor the way with words like Si Jin, whom got the gift from his wife and so this is really a tough one for him. Lifting his eyes from his wooden floor, she obviously didn't wait for him.

He sighed again. Torn between amusement and exasperation. She's really like a child.

Yoo Young Geun watched her excitedly taking out groceries after groceries like it was Christmas. He reached for a familiar paper bag. One he knew is from his favourite tea shop in Seoul and counted 8 boxes of tea. Startled, he thought, Is there a sale?

Apparently no. Because there are his other groceries now on his table but in large quantities. Is there a war coming? Did North Korea said they are going to launch a missile at Seoul? Was there a state emergency? 

Mo Yeon was still chattering away but his mind was lost in the shocking truckload of groceries and he is already dreading how he could finish everything and secretly wondered if Mo Yeon mind he share them with the nearby orphanage.

In the middle of his own lamentations and feeble attempts at solutions, one word brought him back.

"Albania?"

"Nae..I told you during my last visit. I'm leaving for Albania in a few days."

"Mwo? You weren't kidding about it?"

"Of course not, Ahjussi!" her face in mocked aghast.

She continued on about how her next few days will be so tediously mundane. Necessary paperwork after paperwork, dealing with her fresh new interns and leaving them with a pile of work, getting her own essential items, sending her mum on an Europe trip - this time, Paris. She grumbles how her mum spends her money like water and wondered out loud what is there in Paris. 

Her babbles were a little drown out at the moment as he draw his own thoughts in his mind. Albania no doubt a charming country and had only recently achieve some peace but still....where she will be sent, if he recalled from her last visit, is a small village very near to the borders of Kosovo which is still in the middle of conflicts. He often heard of raids and there was a bombing not too long ago too.

"Mo Yeon-ah..I don't think this is a good idea. Volunteering is good and noble but can't you pick a safer place? Why Albania? There are tons of others you could probably choose."

Surely she did not mean to risk her life. The horrid accounts of wars and torture cambers, no matter how muddled it is in his mind, he can recall them like day. Anything could have happen and it would take awhile for any military rescue to reach them. Getting in is a problem, landing on the terrain itself is another problem. 

"Don't worry, Ahjussi..." she assured him, a little short of breath and gave him a smile. She turned back to focus on her task at hand while tiptoeing slightly to move the stack cans of miso paste to make room for new additions.

He handed her a tin of cocoa powder, utterly unconvinced. Then several bottles of ketchup, his 8 boxes of tea, assorted packages of biscuits, 20 packs of ramen, some coffee...Oh god, did she intend to stay there a whole year? Because that has to be the only explanation judging by how she had bought him the entire grocery store. He glanced at the dining table. There's toiletries too. Yes. He could probably set up a grocery store right here in his own abode.

"Why Albania?" 

He wants to know. What is there in Albania that she is so dead set on going? 

Mo Yeon closed the cabinet doors and came down carefully from the stool with the help of his hand. She looked a little sheepish and embarassed. Biting her lips, she explained.

"I was out with Myung Joo and some of the Alpha team members were there. We were just out having dinner when Sergeant Choi mentioned in passing that Yoo Si Jin-ssi's last mission was somewhere near Albania."

Yoo Young Geun could only stared at her as she finds words to say. 

"His death anniversary...." And there. They both felt it. It is still an elephant in the room. The fact that Si Jin is dead. Of course throughout their meetings, they do sometimes talk about Si Jin. But having her actually uttering the word and how they are approaching the anniversary, it is still hard to swallow. His absence. The absence that bought them both together.

"His death anniversary is just around the corner. I gave it a thought about what I should do, or what can I do to remember him? And just then, an opportunity was passed to me by a senior. He could not make it to his volunteer trip as the doctor-in-charge and he was in an urgent need of a replacement. I took it. Yoo Si Jin-ssi has always wanted me to be a real doctor, not one that just goes on TV and make good money but one that holds her oath in her heart and I thought this is the best way to pay tribute to him. Besides.." She continued on a lighter tone. "Some changes of environment is good. I am so bored of the white walls and being constantly harassed by Dr Kim and her never-ending meds supply issue. Don't worry, Ahjussi. I will be back for Christmas. And we shall celebrate it together. There's this good restaurant I saw on the SNS that offers turkey."

Mo Yeon left after dinner, promising to text when she arrived but told him that reception there could be very bad. He gave her his blessings. How could he not after all the reasons she gave? 

Yoo Young Geun thought it ironic. Are the Gods being cruel or kind that they allowed him to meet Mo Yeon? Because it tortures him. The more he knows her. Seeing her was enough to throw him in despair, getting to know her and growing very fond of her reminds him so much of what Si Jin could not have. This wonderful, perfect woman to hold and to love. And her little "speeches", just like her most recent reason of going to Albania tears his heart out and batters his soul to the ground. How she love him. How she chose to love him. His son. Their son.

They say there is two sides to a coin. Yoo Young Geun cannot decide which side the Gods gave him.

It was a day before Si Jin's death anniversary and he was just about to leave the house for a meet with an old friend when his house phone rang. It couldn't have been Mo Yeon. She texted that reception is really bad and she would try to communicate with him over the weekends when she goes town. So who else could it have been?

"Hello..."

The words of the caller nearly had him dropped the phone handle. His mind went blank and he could not process what he had just heard.

"Hello...Hello....Ahjussi....Ahjussi....Did you hear me? Captain Yoo is alive...Captain Yoo is alive...Hello....Hello..." 

He grabbed on to the arm rest of his couch, feeling weak in the knees. His knuckles are turning white from gripping so tightly to the phone handle. It didn't bother him. It didn't register with him. All he heard are Sergeant Choi's words that Si Jin is alive. 

"Yes....Yes..." he croaked. His voice so hoarse and overcome with emotions.

"Ahjussi, Captain Yoo is alive. He called base. Where he is at, he is unable to make personal calls. He is coming home but is heading to Albania first. "

Oh, thank God..Thank God...Thank God...

He weep over and over and over. He forgot how long he wept or how many times he thanked the Gods and his wife in Heaven. By the end of whatever time he spent bawling out, he thought he could die in happiness.

In the end, he guessed, the Gods has given him the good side of the coin.