Eyes Open

Jimin's Struggle

Jimin was the first to wake up.  It was 8 in the morning.  At first he didn’t know where he was, sending him into a panic.  When he moved, he felt something pull at his arm.  Lodged under his skin and taped down was an IV.  It was then he remembered.  He looked around and saw all the boys.  Hoseok was sleeping right next to him, his head resting next to his hand.  Jimin could see he had been crying; his eyes were all puffy.  He lifted his hand and placed it on Hoseok's hair.  He loved his brother a lot, and felt really sorry for hurting him. 

Hoseok woke at Jimin’s touch.  He had only been asleep for a couple hours, but it had been a light and disturbed sleep.  Jimin’s touch woke him immediately.  Hoseok looked up at Jimin, who smiled weakly at his hyung. 

“Hey,” Jimin whispered.  

Hoseok smiled. 

“Hey, how are you feeling?” 

Jimin looked around to see if the other boys were awake yet.  None were. 

“Uh, I’m alright, I think.  How long have I been asleep?” 

Hoseok looked at his phone.  “About 14 hours straight.” 

Jimin’s eyes grew wide.  “Really?  Wow!”  

Hoseok just watched Jimin, wishing he could fix everything in an instant.

Jimin remembered everthing that had happened the previous evening.  He stared at his wrist and watched the IV work.  His gut churned because of it.  He knew it was acting as a substitute for food, and he wanted to rip it out of his arm.  Hoseok noticed the look Jimin gave the IV and took Jimin’s hand. 

“Jimin, it’s ok.  It’s helping you.” 

Jimin looked at his hyung in the eyes, appearing sad and upset at the same time. 

“I know, I do, but you don’t understand.  I just want to rip it out hyung!  I don’t want to be the chubby kid anymore…” 

Jimin teared up a little, but remained calm.  Hoseok teared up too. 

“Jimin, you have never been fat!  You are perfect just the way you are!  Don’t you understand that all of us love you just as you are?” 

Jimin looked around at the other sleeping boys in the room.  His tears overflowed and traveled silently down his cheeks.  They always supported him.  He was so sorry for scaring them. 

Jimin looked back at Hoseok, who also had tears running down his face.  It took Jimin a moment to figure out what he wanted to say. 

“Hyung, forgive me.  I didn’t want to hurt you.  I didn’t want any of this.  I just, I, I don’t know…”  

Hoseok gripped Jimin’s hand tighter.  “Of course Jimin.  I’m always here for you.” 

Jimin smiled weakly. 

“Thank you, for everthing.” 

He remembered the way his hyung had found him the night before.  He must have really frightened him.  But he was so thankful for Hoseok and the way he had treated him with compassion. 

“Hyung, than you for not getting angry.  I deserved a lecture and a good smack, but you just held me and was quiet.  I really am grateful for that.”  

Hoseok smiled through tears.  “You’re welcome Jimin.” 

That was all that was needed. 

 

*********************

 

It wasn’t long after when the other boys woke up.  Each of them reassured Jimin that they weren’t angry with him.  They all shared their concern and love for him.  Jimin couldn’t believe just how much the others had worried for him.  He didn’t think he was that important.  Obviously he was wrong. 

That day was eventful.  The boys were supposed to be on a television show that afternoon, but it was cancelled.  Of course, word got out about Jimin’s condition, and it didn’t take long for Twitter to explode.  The boys searched their phones in that small room, reading all the ARMY’s concerned tweets.  There were a few that were insulting and hateful, but ARMY attacked them and told Jimin not to pay them any attention.  Jimin was overwhelmed with how much love his fans were giving him.  They were telling him that they loved him just the way he was, that he was beautiful and perfect.  Later that evening, he posted an update to comfort his fans.  It read: “Feeling much better.  Resting peacefully.  I’m sorry to have scared all my beautiful fans so much.  I was wrong, and will do better.  My brothers are all amazing, and ARMY gives me strength and hope.  Thank you for all the love.”

That tweet blew up Twitter.  Fans were eager to show their support for Jimin.  Never had he expected them to be so understanding and loving.  He smiled as he read all their replies, grateful for such an amazing ARMY.

 

Author's Note: 

Two chapters in one day!!  Exciting!!  Sorry this chapter is so short :(  I promise the next chapter will be longer.  Anyway, I hope everyone is enjoying this story so far!!  Let me know what you think, and feel free to let me know if you find any mistakes :)

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Comments

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ma_qiaoli
#1
Chapter 8: going to read taetae's fic now while preparing my feels :)
ma_qiaoli
#2
Chapter 8: This was really beautiful and well-written! I teared up at some parts because it hurts to read about chimchim's feelings about him being 'fat' (which he never is lol he's beautiful and more smol and adorable than me) but I loved how this fic felt like reality to me. It was melancholic, but I absolutely loved how it ended :) I wish I could show this fic to everyone with eating anxieties so they could know how much they are loved just for the way they are huhu ;-;
chewychoc-o
#3
Chapter 1: WOW! I LIKE THIS
Jinsoneandonly #4
Definitely ;)
johncenaisbae #5
Chapter 3: Sometimes I think it is your goal to make me cry