Cruelly, I’m growing apart from you too cruelly

What’s so hard about saying goodbye?

I can’t even open my mouth

Cruelly, I’m growing apart from you too cruelly

‘’Wake me up. This isn’t real.’’

‘’This isn’t real.’’

‘’Let me wake up.’’

I couldn’t be real. It had to be a dream. A horrible, horrible dream that would soon be over. She would soon wake up from the terribly false reality she was making up in her head and everything would be fine again. Because this was just a bad dream. Horrible dream. It wasn’t happening.

This wasn't happening. She was not at her funeral. She was not dead. She hadn't been hit by the car. Her Yong was still alive. If she picked up the call and called her, her Yong would pick up. She couldn't be dead. This wasn't real. This was all in her head, a dream made from her twisted imagination. It had to be. She was the problem. She had a problem, her head was wrong for even imagining something like this. This wasn’t reality. It was all fake.

Except it wasn't. No matter how much she tried to push it away she knew it was happening and at just the thought of this the tears pushed their way out of her eyes, like they had been doing for the last hour. It's been an hour since the funeral was done. Everyone had left, gone home to mourn and then move on. Yong was deep under the ground at this point, but Moon wouldn't leave the church.She couldn’t make herself leave.

So she sat there, alone and cold and crying, trying to handle all her emotions. Where would she go now? What could she do? She couldn't remember how she had lived before meeting Yong, how she had been able to go on with her day without her sun by her side. How did she manage to do that then? She couldn't imagine it. It was impossible. She needed her. She was her other half.

Without her, she was lost. Lost in this big, empty world without a mission. Without a goal. Earlier, she didn’t need those things, not when she had Yong. Now she had nobody and she was all alone. ‘’Why wasn’t I with her? Why couldn’t I have done something?’’ In her final moments, she had been alone. All alone on the dark, cold streets. With rain and unfamiliarity surrounding her, she had left this world, and she had left it without me.

‘’What do I do without you?’’ How would she continue living when she didn't have her reason to be alive anymore?

Moon was firmly holding around a pocket watch in her pocket. She was holding it so hard that if she took out her hand from the pocket and looked at it, her hand would most likely be white. She loved this pocket watch. The pocket watch her Yong picked out for her at a thrift shop, the pocket watch she had never let out of sight since. It would sometimes stop or show the wrong time but she loved it because Yong had picked it out for her. Her Yong. Just the thought of her Yong broke her scattered heart into a million more pieces and she had to gasp for air in her crying, desperately trying to breathe while crying her broken heart out. Why couldn’t it had been her instead? Yong had been nothing but good to the world, so why would the world take her away? She had loved her so much. The people that didn’t accept their love had said horrible things and many friends had cut contact, which had been hard. But to say goodbye to her was hundred and thousand times more difficult.

‘’What am I supposed to do without you Yong? I- I can’t be without you’’ Desperate words had escaped between her sobs could be heard echoing the almost empty church, before placing her forehead against the picture she was holding and let her loud sobbing continue.

If Moon had listened carefully, she could have heared the ticking. Tick, tack, tick, tack. Steadily. Like always. Those faint ticks and tacks could always be heard in her pocket when it was dead silent.

Until it suddenly stopped ticking.

A sound you hear when you rewind a toy could be in her pocket, before it started ticking again, with the same pace as earlier. Tick, tack, tick, tack.

But Moon didn't hear this. These sounds were so faint, and she was sobbing loudly, overlapping the quiet sounds from her beloved pocket watch. Listening at her beloved watch she was holding didn’t even occur to her right now.

Light hit her face. Through the church window, the sun was burning. Head lifted slightly up so she could look out the window. It was raining an hour ago. The world had been mourning Yong with them, dark skies with cries.

‘’You can’t be happy yet! She’s still gone! Why are you shining? Wh-why are yo-’’ Moon felt frustration and pain. How could the world get over her so quickly? Why was the sun shining when the world had lost it’s most precious sun?

Quickly, Moon stood up. She couldn’t be here anymore. Her cheeks wet with tears, nose stuffed and world spinning around her, she sniffed before placing the picture of her one and only sun down on the seat where she had just been sitting. Turning around quickly and clenching her fist, holding tight in her dress pants, she let her last sob escape her before walking out quickly of the church, wiping away her tears.

Eyes focused on her fast feet. She just wanted to get out of here and far away. So far away she could. In her own world, tears still running silently down her cheeks, as soon as she got outside the church she walked into someone. She could tell by the impact and the book that fell to the ground right next to her feet, her feet that she wouldn’t stop looking at. In a confused and sad state, without looking up at the person once, Moon bowed carefully.

‘’I’m sorry.’’ She mumbled, but loud enough for the stranger to hear her. She didn’t want to appear rude, so she knelt quickly, picking up the book and handing it to the stranger, still eyes glued to shoes. If the person saw her now she would wonder what type of person she was, running out of the church in this state.

‘’Oh, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it.’’

No.

No, it couldn’t be.

She recognized that voice everywhere, but it wouldn’t be. She had to be hearing things. This can’t be real.

Moon slowly lifted her head for the first time, letting her eyes following the body of who she thought was a complete stranger in front of her, but as she got closer and closer to her face her head was screaming that she was wrong. This wasn’t a stranger, this was h-

Moon’s eyes met hers.

It was her.

She felt her body fill up with an emotion she couldn’t describe even if she tried her very hardest and every part of her was telling her that this couldn’t happen but yet is was. Right in front of her stood a girl brighter than any other, her other piece, her sun. It was Yong.

Moon didn’t think twice before she threw herself around the older girls neck and hugging her as hard as she could. Tears started pressing out of her eyes again, but this time it was happy tears. Yong wasn’t dead. She was here, right in front of her. The embrace was that type that it seemed like if she let her go, she would disappear and she would lose her again, the world would take her away. She couldn’t let the world take away her only sun.

It only took seconds before Yong had placed her hands on Moon chest and pushed her hard and suddenly away, and just like that, everything Moon was thinking broke down as she flew into the wall behind her. Her eyes looked up on Yong with confusion filling them.

‘’What are you doing? Are you out of your mind?’’ Yong said, looking at Moon like she was a crazy person. The youngest didn’t understand a thing.

‘’Wai- wait wha-‘’ Moon tried to say before she was cut off.

‘’I don’t know you.’’ Yong said, before brushing off her dress and entering the church quickly, with a small ‘tch’ coming from her as she passed.

Moon felt like she had just been stabbed with pain and the bangaid that was put on her healing heart had just been ripped off. What did she mean, she didn’t know her? She had spent most of her life with her! Moon tried to look after her, but Yong had closed the door to the church. Confused, Moon set off. She knew her routine, and she knew where she would go after church.

Moon sat on a bench outside the building she knew Yong would come to around 1:20pm with a newspaper in her hands. At first, she had just picked up the newspaper to hide her post-cry face from bypassers. Then she had used it to look like she was distracted, when she felt her face heat down a bit. It was at that second moment se looked at the newspaper and realized something was wrong. She had seen this paper before. She had definitely seen it. Every morning she reads the paper in the kiosk next to the bus stop before she is yelled at, and she had read this front page before. Moon felt ever muscle tense up as she slowly moved her eyes from the head title to the date in the very right corner. It was the second time today she refused to believe something, because it didn’t happen.

Yet it did.

The date on the corner of the newspaper wasn’t today. Today was 18^th of July, but 18^th of July was two weeks in the future. Well, it was according to this newspaper.

Moon dropped the paper immediately and quickly checked the newspaper box, pulling out paper after paper. Every single one had the same date on it. 4^th of July.

Realization hit her.

She had been given a second chance. A second chance to save her one and only. With no idea how she had gotten that second chance, she fell down on her knees right there, thanking every single creature and thing that popped into her mind. Thanking the world for giving her the second chance to save her.

She couldn’t die this time. The world can’t be robbed from such a perfect person once more.

Then realization hit her once more.

Yong didn’t know who she was anymore. Yong only knew her as the lunatic who hugged her outside of church. How would she get her to listen to her? It had taken Moon years to build up their friendship, and then many more years to get her to return her feelings. It had taken her years, and now she only had two weeks.

Piano music. She heard the piano music she was waiting for. Quickly she jerked herself up from the ground and looked at the building she was sitting in front of. The music school. The music school Yong went to. She was brilliant at the piano. Moon had never heard someone play I more beautifully. Only hours ago she feared she would never be able to hear her play live again, never heard that sweet melody fill a room or a space and just disappear in it. But now she was.

A low sigh escaped , before she sat down on the bench and waited. Who knew how long she would sit there: when Yong first started playing, she could go on for hours. But it didn’t matter. Moon loved listening to her play, even if it was through a window two stories up from where she was sitting. She could spend hours just listening. As long as it was her playing.

The sun had started to go down, and streetlights were on. Moon had tried to check her pocket watch for what time it is, but it was gone. After searching for 10 minutes, she realized it wasn’t here, and at that point it could be anywhere, so she had given up and sat down, continuing her waiting. She just wanted to see her one last time today. The playing had stopped ten minutes ago, and Moon was patiently sitting and waiting for her. She would come out any minute now, she was su-

Just as that thought had run by her, a familiar person walked fast by her. Everything about her was so familiar. The way it smelled when she walked past, her clothes, her looking down on her phone, listening to music. It was probably classical. She adored classical. Moon didn’t, but that didn’t care because she did. She studied the girl walking straight forward towards the road while looking down on her phone. Peaceful, beautiful, alive. Moon felt happy. Happy because her sun was alive and well and playing piano again and that they would be friend again and go back to how it was before and she wasn’t dead. She was happy for so many things, watching the slightly older girl walking. She wouldn’t interfere. Not yet, she would let Yong finish off this day without having to see her again, so they could start fresh tomorrow.

That was until Moon realized the traffic light was red. And Yong was meters away from the busy road, with no signs of stopping.

Moon had never gotten up so quickly before, and it was like the distance between her and Yong was closed by a second.

Only centimeters away from the road and a second away from being hit by a car, Yong was pulled hard back, turned around and suddenly in the arms of someone. As this happened she heard the car driving fast right behind her. It wouldn’t have stopped. If she hadn’t been stopped, that car would have hit her. If this person, this stranger, holding around hadn’t pulled her away, she would have been injured. She could have been dead. Yong started shaking and the mysterious person embrace became a little tighter, as to calm her down. The slightly shorter girl felt the other person breathing out.

She slowly backed her head a bit away to see the face of her rescuer. She was met by a familiar face. A familiar face burning with worry. Yong was quick to recognize her. It was the girl from before, from the church this morning. This was the second time hugging her today, both times involuntarily but second time more thankful. She had saved her life. Yong opened to say something, but she was cut off by the black haired, taller girl taking a grip of her shoulders and looking her into her eyes.

‘’You have to be careful.’’ Those words came from the taller girl. Every word with such meaning behind it, such power, such worry. Yong didn’t know how to respond, she just looked into the others eyes. The mysterious girls eyes were talking, but Yong couldn’t figure out what they were trying to say. They had too many emotions at once, filling her up. Yong almost wanted to comfort this girl, ask her what was worrying her, what was wrong. ‘’Yong, what’s wrong with you? You don’t even know this girl and she shouldn’t be none of your business!’’ She was right, she knew that, but it still felt like she was. It felt like she needed her as much as herself had needed her right now. Her own thoughts was cut off when the mysterious girl continued talking, still with worry and other emotions she wasn’t able to understand filling every word.

‘’Promise me that. Promise me that you’ll be careful. You can’t get yourself hurt.’’

Yong nodded. She didn’t know why she would do that, she didn’t even know the girls name, but she still nodded. She had to, and she didn’t know why.

Cruelly, I’m growing apart from you too cruelly

Because you’ll be left in my heart deeper than a scar

I don’t think I’ll be able to erase you

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au: i don't want to write too much here, but i feel like i need to explain myself. i apologize this didn't come out before now. if you have read my other stories and used to read my au, you would know i have been in the hospital alot. it was starting to look really good and i had even been allowed to live at home again permenantly for the first time in three year. i created this fic and was looking forward to writing it, and maybe going back to school and all that. but then something bad happened, and i had to go back to the hospital (as earlier, i dont want to share my sickness or more detail than that). then it became very serious, and there were alot of things i couldn't do myself anymore. after that i dont feel comfertable sharing what happened to me, but i started recovering because i wasn't interested in giving up just yet and now im fine enough again to use a phone and things like that, so i'll try start writing again! 

ALSOooo, can you guess what song im basing this off? so many already know and commented. however, i wont stay 100% true to the mv storyline but use it as a bone structure, so don't think you know everything that will happen yet! also im writing this eventhough moonsun is practically dead, i will cling on you cant stop meeee
 

ok bye! i'll update as soon as possible!